In the middle of the night, Allen was extremely busy. Moving from one place to another and fighting monsters wasn’t an easy thing to do.

Although he wasn’t the least bit exhausted, however, it was very troublesome to do so.

And dawn finally appeared.

All the monster activities finally ceased. All of them instantly retreated after their eyes returning back to normal, regaining their sanity.

Allen stretched his arms and neck while walking towards his quarters. On his side was the [ Sigbin ], following like a loyal dog wagging its tail happily.

Along the way, Allen could feel the strange stares directed at them. Not once did he received a ‘Thank you’ and was instead only given odd and fearful gazes… but that was fine.

When Allen arrived at his supposed to be room, he was greeted by a woman.

But what surprised Allen was that it wasn’t Aileen or the others but Ms. Grace who he hadn’t seen for so long.

“Miss Grace!”

“Allen!!” Ms. Grace jumped from the bed and immediately rushed towards him and happily hugged him.

“I heard about a strong black clothed youth coming here. I thought it must be you so I came here. And I was actually right!”

Allen was happy to see her again being cheerful like this. Sitting on the table, they happily spend the time talking about Ms. Grace days in this place.

Although it seemed like, her mother wasn’t in this place.

Hearing this, Allen felt a very bad premonition.

However, he shook his head. Even if that’s the case, he can’t tell her this kind of thing. Besides, Ms. Grace wasn’t a kid anymore; she should have already realized it herself and even if she hadn’t, this thought should’ve appeared even once in her mind.

The atmosphere instantly turned heavy.

Allen noticed that she was enduring it and tears had even already started to appear in the corner of her eyes but Allen pretended that he didn’t saw it and tried changing the topic.

Listening to Allen’s adventure along the way managed to brighten her mood slightly. Of course, Allen hides several important things and only those things that were alright to be known by anyone.

“So that’s the monsters I heard about…” Ms. Grace cast a glance to lightning who was leisurely munching a bread and the [ Sigbin ] sleeping beside Allen’s feet.

Ignoring their strange appearances, they really looked like normal pets.

“Yes, these are my friends. The [ Lightning Mouse ] over there is called lightning while this kid is, Silver.”

Ms. Grace looked at them for a moment before returning her gaze to Allen. She appeared reluctant for some reason.

“Allen, you know…in my way here, I…” Ms. Grace bit her lip in hesitation.

“…I heard about some people talking about you and they…”

“It shouldn’t be some good stuff, right?” Allen smiled while drinking the milk coffee.

He already knows about this.

“Yeah,” Ms. Grace nodded.

Her expression was filled with sadness and bit of anger.

“They keep calling you monster here and monster that. They don’t even know you and yet, how could they criticize you like that?!”

Ms. Grace voice started soft but from the middle, it transformed into a roar of anger! If she was holding a pillow, she must have torn it to pieces by now.

Allen felt moved looking at her being angry for him.

The teacher he knows before was still the same teacher.

“It’s alright; I don’t really care about stuff like that. Just let them say what they want; people tend to live their lives bound by what they accept and cursed something they can’t… they would feel tired later on.”

“But, ”

“Anyway, it doesn’t matter. I’m already used to it.”

But in response to his words, Ms. Grace shook her head unhappily.

“No, it’s not good at all.”

“Why?”

“… won’t you remained being misunderstood then-“

Allen raised his eyebrow in disbelief but after a moment, he just gives a wry smile: “Doesn’t really matter.”

“That can’ be!” Ms. Grace couldn’t accept Allen’s views and unconsciously raised her voice. “That’s irrational and inexplicable. I do not understand what reasons they are calling you such ridiculous names when you have saved and protected them! That’s very selfish of them!!”

“But they’re the ones who form the society, Ms. Grace. Those who can’t be understood by everyone are no different from non-existences; this is the rule of this society that we are part of. That is the very nature of a human being.”

…After a long silence, Ms. Grace unhappily spoke,

“I admit it that I find it very vexing for you to say those words naturally, Allen, but I do admit that what you said makes sense.”

Ms. Grace responded with a downcast expression. A painful expression colored her pair of eyes.

Allen scratched the back of his head and with a gentle tone as if he was comforting her, he said, “Besides, it’s not like I was doing this because I wanted to get praised or idolized by anyone…”

Because, to be honest, he had no interest in it after all.

He didn’t desire to become strong for something like sympathy or praise.

A case of theft: this story is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.

He didn’t even think of wanting such things.

At the start of the Apocalypse, Superhumans who possess power and strange abilities that were out of human understanding would either be treated good, like a savior, a hero but on another hand, some were treated like evil, a demon.

Especially those powers and abilities that are too powerful that it could destroy anything. Humans will fear it, no matter how you show goodwill and kindness. This was still new to them, after all.

That is why he had no intention to hide, whether it was his own abnormality or his anomaly.

It was fine even if he was hated.

It was fine even if he was feared.

Thus, this was something he deserved. It was troublesome, but he could not salvage anything.

If he could change things with his own hands, saved and protect those people whom he treasured, then compared to it, something like admiration and praised is nothing.

That was Allen’s reason -- Although this might just be his way to console and protect himself from this nonsensical reality…

However, that was fine.

But Ms. Grace was not convinced.

“Allen, even superheroes like Superman wanted to be praised. They wanted to be acknowledged by anyone… that was why they wanted to become superheroes.”

“But I am not a superhero, and I never wanted to become one. For me, nothing really matters when I have a code.”

“…then what is your code, Allen…”

“… …” Allen paused for a moment and looked at the dark orange colored sky.

“My code…”

The reason why he kept on fighting in his previous world and this world…

Why he kept on pursuing power…

Was it for praise? Was it for kindness…?

At this moment, he suddenly understood something!

…it wasn’t for that kind of good reason…

It’s already a very, long time ago when he realized, he has no purpose in life at all… except for pursuit for power.

At first, he wanted revenge… and that was his goal all along.

However, the moment he killed the very creature that killed his sister, he realized… he was empty.

No ideals, no wishes, and not even knowing how to lead a life. I’m completely empty inside, with no purpose to go for…

He wandered and drifted, walking without a compass, a course or a map.

He had traveled the globe and it didn't matter if he was in a crowd or alone, he found nothing but emptiness and futility.

He knew happiness for brief moments of time, depending on the circumstances, but no lasting joy.

Only fighting battles with his life on the line while bearing a makeshift belief that he existed to become the strongest makes him complete… but was that really so…?

Maybe that was the reason why he followed Mia and the others back then.

Because he was attracted to their light, their goals and purpose.

They are shining so dazzling he was almost blinded… he was very jealous.

You’re strong indeed, but what can you gain after doing this…?

Fight with us…

They finally made someone like him, with no true purpose at all, an indispensible existence…

No matter what sorry state this world becomes, to me, to someone like me who only knows how to fight, this kind of world is much, much better compared to whatever it was before… I know, it sounds like a complete lunatic would spout off.

But…

In this kind of world, I have a role to take part in.

It’s not like the plays I did back in school, when I was just someone from the backstage, or just a tree or grass on the stage…

I’m not someone like that anymore who only watched people becoming the spotlight.

I had a role!

… and that makes life so damn bearable!

When he died and transported in this time, although he felt aggrieve and pain because of his friend’s betrayal but a part of him was also happy.

Indeed, Celty’s betrayal gave him a huge shock.

He trusted Celty the most as she was one of the most important people he had and even vowed to protect her but she still betrayed him. Her betrayal has left a deep wound in his heart. This kind of pain isn’t something an ordinary person could understand.

And that pain caused something within him broke.

But he was reincarnated to another him! He felt bitter about it, but at the same time, he welcomed it.

Maybe with this, he wouldn’t be someone without a purpose anymore?

He would be able to change the outcome and save the world.

I would become a Hero!

That became his drive in this new world.

… but I was wrong.

I thought that I already changed from the ‘me’ before I met Mia and the others but in fact I did not. I felt something inside of me squirming and bubbling as if it wanted to come out.

And then he realized, all along he didn’t change. He realized something after fighting Alkrasha and the words Mia had told him back there itch on his heart.

He was weak! That is why he needed to be strong! Stronger than any existence in this world!!

With that power, he could acquire everything and not be taken by anyone.

However is that really alright? That mindset… isn’t that just selfishness?

Then Allen remembered when he met Flor. At that time, wasn’t there also people hiding in fear and in need of saving…?

Why did he not save them and just left them to their fate…? Why did he not care about them…?

Then I realized…

He was still the same ‘him’ he thought he had already forgotten.

A self-righteous bastard that wouldn’t care about the lives of many people. He held neither compassion nor sympathy for his fellow humans and thought that… whether they live or not is not his concern.

As long as the people around me live, that is all that matters.

Even if many people die, he wouldn’t care.

As long as the people close to him don’t have to die, then he doesn’t mind having bloods on his hands no matter how much it is.

He’s fine with being dirtied, feared, and hated… as long as he can protect them.

That’s how selfish and self-centered I was!

But that was fine…

“My code… is to live life bound by nothing. I will shake the fetters restraining me and become the most powerful existence alive.”

He made his conviction. And this conviction would never change! He will stick it to it no matter what happens.

… Even if he found out in the end that this path he had taken was wrong!

I won’t mind becoming something like that.

Ms. Grace eyes widened her eyes.

She was surprised but even more so shaken by the strong will she felt from those words.

“I want to become even stronger. I want the power that could force this world to change. Change to my own convenience, to my own desire!”

Let me be selfish and self-centered.

“… isn’t that the power to protect? To save the people, the world…?” Ms. Grace asked worriedly.

“Whatever it is… is fine by me…” Allen said resolutely.

As long as I become the most powerful existence that nobody could ignore at.

Demon king? He would become at my mercy.

Demons? They would kneel before me.

Betrayal? I don’t care if you betray me but the moment you do so, I will crush you!

At this moment, Allen completely made up his mind and his eyes shined sharply with firm will and determination.

I won't waver anymore!

“… …”

“… as long as I could achieve that. I wouldn’t care about anything."

With absolute power, he can protect and save.

With absolute power, he could become freer than anyone else.

He wouldn’t be betrayed, be hurt and be crushed by anyone.

"... And with power, I might be able to find the reason of my existence…”

“Allen…” When Ms. Grace heard those words, for some unknown reason, she felt a pang of pain stabbing in her heart.

She suddenly wanted to console him, comfort him and told him that he didn’t need to… that such existence is a lonesome existence.

But she couldn’t form any words.

Her mouth opened and then closed like a fish out of water.

What should she say in this kind of situation? What were the right words that’s need to be said.

Allen had noticed the woman’s ambivalence and could only smile wryly.

He didn’t need to force his ideals to others. He knows that his views are ridiculous and unreasonable.

“You don’t need to say anything teach, I know how unreasonable my thoughts were and I’m not planning on forcing it to someone else. I also don’t need any kind of comfort or console. This is what I wanted, and would never bend no matter what anyone else says.” 

“… …”

“…People might call me a monster or a devil along the way, but that doesn’t really matter. If need be, I shall live and die as a monster.”

“That is the path I choose to take, and the path I choose to walk.”

“Whether this will become my regret in the future, only my self is to blame. Wrong or not, I will follow my own path.”

“……”

Ms. Grace’ expression showed that she still couldn’t accept it, but there was nothing else that she could ask or speak of anymore.

To accept being feared like it was only natural while still continued walking forward.

Carrying out great exploits that should be extolled while not wanting for any praise at all, he sacrificed himself for greater goods.

Such thing… that way of life of him that only got burdened with loss.

What a pitiful man…

… This moment, Ms. Grace suddenly has a premonition that if she doesn’t say anything right now, she would regret it in the future. She would lose a chance to change something that should have still be changeable…!

However, it’s already too late.

If that is the case… then I will …

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