When Star E. Skye heard the words, 'lights, camera, action,' little did she know it would be lights, camera, murder instead!

Against a star speckled backdrop reflecting the infiniteness of space, she stood upon a massive paper mache asteroid, dressed in a light green space warrior's outfit. Her bulging muscles and toned midriff emphasized her super hero physique and large, spherical green planetoid earrings and a poofy blond pompadour showcased a fashion sense that was out of this world. As an acclaimed actress, she had been contracted to play the heroic Venus from the hit space serial, Venus Warrior from Mars.

Directly opposing her, on the extended arm of a diabolic space station was a nefarious, cone headed, blue skinned alien. His eyes were colorless, his mouth full of fangs and he sported a sinister black robe with a cape. He screamed as loud as he could in a shrill and squeaky but no less threatening voice.

"Venus Andromeda, my sworn enemy, not even the cosmos could foretell this clash of intergalactic proportions!"

His actor clearly enjoyed the hammy approach, which Star agreed was the perfect foil to her sassy character. She grinned mightily and replied, "Oh please, you're such a mondo dork, Emperor Zork. We fight each other every space week and I always win!"

"Gah," Zork howled, recoiling. "Your insults truly bend this space time continuum, but this time, I've come prepared!"

Zork reached into his robe with a wide and manic grin. "Unfortunately, this will be your final destination, galactic girl!"

He removed a light green gun with a yellow ball on the top. "With this superphasic cosmic lazer, I will explode you like a star across this galaxy."

Star rolled her eyes and drew a matching laser beam from her utility belt. "Are you done?" she taunted. "I swear your evil monologues bore a bigger hole in me than the blackhole in sector Z."

"Where did you get that?" Zork howled. "Did you go to the same space mart as me?!"

"No!" Star smirked. "I stole it from your estranged evil clone, Emperor Gork."

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"...Never mind," Zork answered and he giggled flamboyantly. "Let's end this once and for all!"

Star took a battle stance and aimed it right at him. "Today is the day I finally save the galaxy from you and your triangle head!"

She angled her finger on the trigger. Her mind completely focused on earning her salary and the epic ratings she'd draw from this episode. But first, she'd have to utter her world famous catchphrase that everyone loved but her. With a click and the sound of a laser beam filling the air, she shouted, "Ziggity Zap!"

Faster than the relentless pull of hyperspace, (or so it seemed) a projectile fired from the gun and ripped a hole in Emperor Zork's cloak. He clutched his chest with a high pitched scream and tumbled from the space station.

Fortunately, he was wearing a safety harness so once his body tumbled, he hung suspended on a long rope.

Star watched as his body remained motionless.

"Cut!" the director shouted across from the studio.

He was a stocky man with a swathy black goatee, a bright red vest that resembled a cross between a life preserver and a high fashion item and a purple beret. He immediately rose from his chair. "Zork, baby! That was ingenious acting on your part. I was 110% sold that Miss Hero had shuffled you off the mortal coil!"

Zork did not grace the director with a response. He continued to hang motionless.

"But," the director shouted. "You missed out on screaming Zork's classic line. 'Zarg! What a planet!' before you died."

The director crossed his arms. "Zork is cornier than a corn full of cob, baby. He absolutely needs to say it before he gets resurrected next week!"

The director adjusted his glasses. Zork continued to hang from his harness like an execution victim.

"Excuse me," he said. "Dirk? Mr. Dirk Lord?! Are you alright?"

He turned his head towards Star. "Uh Star, honey, can you check on him?'

Uh oh, Star thought, the boss is using our real names. He really means business here. Dirk really needs to stop kidding around.

Dirk Lord, the actor of Evil Emperor Zork, was a notorious jokester in the studio. If someone's can of soda exploded or there was a turkey sandwich in someone shoes, it was 99.9% the work of Dirk.

"Sure," she nodded and hopped down on her own safety harness.

Her radiant gold skin felt a chill as she moved towards Dirk's body.

I didn't shoot him ..she thought. I couldn't shoot him. It was just a prop. Dirk's just hamming it up as usual.

Her first reflex was to check his pulse. She placed her two fingers in the bottom of his wrist. Her heart sunk into the pit of her stomach.

"Artie…" she cried to the director, strangely mortified for a muscular woman.

"Yes?"

"Dirk isn't acting. He's dead!"