Dear Diary,
So weird discovering shit about the interconnectedness of the Body, Mind, and Soul, then wondering how much of that shit would have applied back where I came from.
I mean, some of it seems pretty straightforward, and probably would. Like, if you're in constant pain, it's tough to focus on personal growth and becoming your best self, because every fuckin' thought you have is painted with a liberal dose of 'fuck that hurts', to the point that even when you're healed, or medicated, or whatever, the 'fuck that hurts' becomes kinda habitual. Not great when you're trying to establish new healthy thought patterns and shit. I guess the same goes the other way? If you've got chronic depression, or unmedicated ADHD, or any other neurospicy shit that doesn't work and play well with the day to day world, getting into any kind of solid workout routine or maintaining a healthy diet is just not in the cards.
Yeah, I get it, there are people out there who have done it. Become Zen Masters while dealing with terminal body wide cancer and shit, or established a gym routine despite not being able to remember to eat. I ain't even mad about it. Seriously, go them! If the chronic pain Zen Master ever manages to find, y'know, some kind of cure for what ails them, everything else is gonna be easy mode. If that poor bitch who can't sit still unless she's hyper focused finally gets the right combination of medication, she might be the next Olympic whatever. But, and this is the important takeaway, those folks are the exceptions, not the rule. Having some kinda physical problem makes mental challenges that much harder, and having some kinda interfering mental issue can set physical challenges to hard mode too.
So I guess my real question is about the whole 'Soul' part of things. Obviously I've got a Soul here, because I can Shape Mana and shit; according to something I heard Doctor Glass in Advanced Healing Studies say, that's the part people use to interact with Mana. Shape it, detect it, generate it, store it, whatever. Which makes me kinda weirded, what with me not being able to detect it very well. I mean, shit, just think about the Ley Lines; anybody with the knack for seeing Mana avoids looking at them just like they avoid looking at the sun. Meanwhile I'm over here going 'yeah, I think I see something, maybe'. Then again, I can see Souls just fine, which I'm not sure is because Souls have a huge Mana density, if the folks in Advanced Healing have particularly powerful Souls, or if it's just a perk of being a Psychopomp.
At any rate, I've got a Soul here, but did I have a Soul back there? Is that what came across? Mana is Energy and Souls are Mana, so I guess it's possible? I can Scry on people back there and watch over their shoulders to catch up on my web shows, so it looks like information can cross that barrier. This way at least. But, like, if Loki somehow got himself to the far side, could he make a fortune giving Soul Shiatsu to folks whose Soul Alignment is desperately out of whack?
There are many ways I could make a fortune in the world of your birth, Tabitha Diaz. Had you asked me a year ago, I would never have even considered 'being a Healer' as one of them.
How 'bout now?
It's grown on me. I'd probably grow bored eventually, but it is soothing, and watching you walk away after is satisfying.
And watching me stumble around the next day like a geriatric?
That would definitely increase the time it would take me to grow bored with it.
That's my Boss. You're the best.
I know.
So yesterday after a full day of playing with Souls like some kind of stress ball filler, Marie wound up kinda zonked. Like, not 'unable to walk' like I've wound up sometimes, but definitely 'less energetic than normal'. Seriously, on our walk back to our rooms? She slouched. Everybody's seen Marie in her normal 'this is what Lancasters are trying to emulate with those rods' prim and proper Maid posture. A few lucky souls like me, and apparently plenty of Dionysus worshippers back in the day have gotten to see 'ready to party' Marie. Apparently so many people have seen her 'ready to fuck shit up' posture that unironic use of the phrase, 'This. Is. Sparta!' comes with a deep seated phobia about it. But slouching? Absolutely not, this would not stand. Like halfway to our rooms I got in front of her little cart and stopped it.
"Saffron? Get the cart, please?"
She shrugged and moved in between Marie and the cart, looking absolutely adorable getting ready to push a Maid's cart that came up to her mid-chest. Meanwhile I gently took hold of Marie's arms, pulled her hands from her cart, then put them over my shoulders and laced her fingers together while she stood there half-stupefied. Once I had her hands situated, I said, "Okay, up up!" and waggled my hands.
She didn't get it. Honestly, just another sign how tired she was. I stepped back toward her, crouched, and grabbed the back of her thighs, lifting her onto my back. When I finally levered her feet off the ground, my hip sent in its resignation, but other than that my biggest problem was that she just kinda slumped there. Then she started purring, and I silently vowed that my hip could fuck off, die, and take my back with it, Murder Mittens was getting a piggy back ride all the way to bed.
On the one hand, I think she's a little lighter than I half expected. On the other hand, given that she's over seven feet tall in stocking feet, I expected something that would break the suspension on a light duty pickup truck. Instead? Honestly, if she hadn't been so limp it wouldn't have been that tough. DuBois PT for the win. But she still weighed more than me and Saffron combined. Probably like twice that, if I had to guess. Don't get me wrong, she not chonk, but she big grrl. As I carried her, I got reminded how while a lot of her volume was fluffy fur? The rest was absolutely dense as fuck muscle. Like, back in my old world she could make ultra-bank on OnlyFans, what with the Ultimate Triple Combo of Maid, Catgirl, and Muscle Mommy. She wouldn't even have to get naked or screw on camera. Just, y'know, point a camera at herself while cleaning up the room. Shit, she could do a whole 'creator collaboration' with other OF creators, visiting their rooms and straightening up while they, I dunno, put their pajamas on and pretended not to be engaged in mad pearl polishing.
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I mean, there would be spicy content if I had anything to say about it. Not that this surprises anyone.
By the time we made it up to our room, my body had turned in its resignation, and I had told it to shut the fuck up and soldier. Menace leapt off the cart and ran forward to get the door, because my girl is awesome helpful like that. I didn't want to just dump Marie on the floor, but with the bed right there inside the door I didn't have to. I collapsed sideways, because if I'd faceplanted into the mattress I'd have suffocated with her on top of me. As we both lay there, her purring, me pretending not to groan from all the achy soreness, I groaned, "Kitten? You mind getting the lights and blankets?" After a second to do something vaguely resembling thinking I added, "and the clothes?"
She huffed as she turned from the cart. "I suppose. I'd hoped to get some work done tonight, but needs must."
Then my Menace hammered all three of our mutual proud mama buttons by stepping in Saffron's way, holding up her hands, and saying. "Na, Ma. I gad dis."
Saffron, being the only one of us able to do so, scooped Isnomi up and nuzzled her, cooing out, "thank you, my girl!" Then, when she set our Menace down, we got to watch as Isnomi shepherded her mom out of the room to her desk, at one point putting her hands on the backs of her mom's thighs and pushing.
When she came back, she'd already ditched most of her own clothes into the dirty clothes pile, and she just stood there staring for a little bit. Between one moment and the next, my back went from covered by my linen uniform shirt to being covered by fuzzy purring Marie front. With my brain wandering from exhaustion and sleepiness, I pondered the idea that apparently Dionysus was enough of a Furry to make his ever expanding Murderfuck Cult exclusively out of upright Siberian tigers, but not so much that he forgot to rearrange Maenad mammaries to match more typical humanoids. Also, I got a sudden weighty reminder that what would look like an athletic B cup on a normal sized woman? Is like, bigger than grapefruit sized. Melons? Yeah. Melons. Cantaloupe. Because if you're already married, and the only way you can get more married is bringing them home to meet the family, then you really can't elope, can you?
What can I say, I'd started the whole piggy back ride tired and a little sore, by the time Menace slid the lights down I'd hit the point of giggling inanely at my own awful boob jokes.
Mimic apparently decided that Mom had stopped looking for her, returned to contemplation of the night sky, didn't see Domnu anywhere, remembered that you see Domnu by not seeing her, then covered what passed for her eyes with her tentacles and went back to trying to hide under herself. I'd be embarrassed, but really, do I have any room to talk after that cantaloupe joke?
Woke up once in the middle of the night when Saffron wormed her way in between Menace and I to complete the full set of nested spoons. My 'oh, no, Menace is on the outside' was summarily mocked and shunned by my recently developed, 'if they try to steal her, I'mma watch, point, and laugh', then I went back to sleep, pleasantly nested right in my proper spot.
We all woke up late. Marie seemed to have nearly as much not-want-to-get-up as I did, so while Saffron and Menace got their stretch on, I half turned and said, "doing Psychopomp stuff really takes it out of you, huh?"
She went still, giving me her 'please wait, response buffering' look for a bit before saying, "Rusty." Then after another pause, "Pausing."
"Yeah, I guess it's been a while since you had to give some lucky bastard the ride of their life." Then I realized what else she'd meant. "You pretty much pulled them out and then did your thing before, didn't you?" When she nodded, I asked, "is it that much harder to, y'know, not pull it all the way out? Or to just hold it there?" She gave Menace a very pointed look, and I thought, Hey, Kitten? Could you go on ahead to Loki's, let him know we both need realignment more than therapy today?
Of course, love.
Both of you? What has Saffron been up to?
Not Saffron, Boss. Marie.
I got the distinct impression that Loki's twig and berries were taking an unaccustomed trip to the interior of his body. Marie.
Yeah, I think she pushed herself a little too hard. She needs it.
What does Dionysus think about me laying hands on one of his Chosen?
I dunno why exactly that pressed my 'all the pissed off' button, but I growled back, whatever the fuck I tell him to think. Why you worried about this, Boss? It's just D.
Daughter, while I appreciate your confidence in me, I am but a Trickster who spent most of the time since the formation of the Pact confined to this cave.
And?
Dionysus is not a Trickster to run and hide. He has, in fact, defied the lords of his own Pantheon. Successfully. For millennia now. With you showering me with Glory recently, I might not be beneath his notice, but I am still, perhaps, less than eager for us to find out which of us is more powerful.
At that point? My pissed off reached just the right levels. Mom Powers Activate. If he has a problem with you and won't sit his ass down and talk it out politely? He can get exactly as fucked as Sengann and Apollo. I get that not all my friends and family might be best buds, might get feeling some kinda way at each other, but if somebody escalates shit, I will de-escalate it. Permanently if I have to.
At that point, Menace and Saffron, both dressed up, disappeared, I assume to Loki's cave. I turned to Marie. "Okay, sweetie, what did you want to show me?"
With a smile and a growl she proceeded to take half an hour or so to demonstrate exactly how torturous 'holding something halfway' could be before I conceded her point to her satisfaction. I instachanged myself into The Dress, and Marie into her uniform, then rolled us both over onto the floor of Loki's cave.
"Sigyn?"
"Yes, my daughter?"
"Could you maybe stick around today? I don't think Marie or I are really up to getting ourselves onto the table."
With a laugh she came over and hefted me up onto the table, Loki banishing The Dress as she lay me face down for him to start working. Then, as if realizing what I'd said, she stuttered, "M. M. Marie? Maenad Marie on my husbands massage table?" Then her jaw shut with an audible snap before she went over, hefted Marie up over her shoulder not unlike what Larry had done with Bonnie, and walked her back to the table. The thing was a feast table designed to seat nearly a dozen people, it fit both of us just fine, and Sigyn started in on an old fashioned regular massage while Loki manhandled my Soul back into place. Before I passed into a sort of blissful state of non-thought, I heard her mutter.
"New item atop the list of 'oddest things I've done for Victory."