Dear Diary,
"Judge others not where you stand,
But where they stood when they chose,
To judge them Equitably."
Doctrine of Tabitha, Book of Egalitarianism
Yeah, I'm really thinking I've milked this as much as I can without repeating myself. If future me isn't back by tomorrow, I'm gonna have to wrap it up and move on. The next section is about Redemption, I guess. I have no idea what I was thinking when I decided that. Like, reading what's gone before, it's like 'oh, hey, make choices, judge people on their choices', and now, what, let them walk away from the consequences or some shit.
Okay, yeah, rereading the bits I didn't write, I guess if somebody cleans up their mess you let them move on and do whatever. Although I gotta wonder if it's a good idea to let them just go back and do the same thing again. Maybe if they're gonna try something new, like, okay, they screwed up and burned the chicken, but they cleaned up all the pots and pans and shit, so now they're gonna try to cook some hamburgers. Look, I don't know from cooking. I eat. I can maybe make sandwiches without screwing them up, if the ingredients come in sandwich appropriate portions and shit like that. You hand me some chicken breasts, a block of cheese, and a loaf of artisan bread, I'm gonna wind up eating two bites of rubber microwave chicken before throwing it away, then nomming down uncut cheese and bread.
Yeah, there's a reason my trunk has junk. Had junk. Because apparently, according to Raven's picture, I am fuckin' ripped. Like Jason Momoa as Aquaman ripped. Or Chris Evans as Captain America. Or The Rock at the height of his wrestling career. Or Dwayne Johnson walking to the grocery store. Mmm... Dwayne Johnson.
Where was I?
Oh, yeah, so spent yesterday evening just kinda staring at the picture of Marie and I. Then looking at her. Then the picture, then back at her. Utterly blew my mind. "Is that really you?"
Marie frowned, and Raven's eyebrow shot up. Saffron led Siobhan around to look at the sketch, nodded, and said, "that captures our Marie, just about perfectly." She looked at Raven with a little throwing away gesture. "I'm sure you could do better with paint, but given you used, what, nothing but charcoal?"
Raven barked out a laugh. "Do you see anything but grayscale on either of them?"
Marie rested her nail tips, her claws, I guessed, on my cheekbone right beneath my eye. "Eyes."
Raven threw her hands above her head, tossing the stub of charcoal. "You asked me for a picture of her. Not of her Soul." Saffron leaned over and whispered something to her, and Raven glanced first at Saffron, who nodded, then back to us. She pointed at us, one finger at each. "I expect an apology when the time comes."
"Uh, sure?" Marie just nodded.
Siobhan reached up and carefully detached the drawing from the easel. "I think it's beautiful." She looked at us. "Might I have it for the Infirmary?"
"Really?" She nodded. "Uh... You can have it in the morning?"
What? I wanted to know who I was canoodling with. With that in mind, I leaned over to whisper, "bed?" In Marie's ear.
Fun night, even if it wound up being a little weird. Like, okay, looking at a picture of somebody while messing around with somebody else is messed up, but what about looking at a picture of the person you're doing the messing around with? Yeah, I get it, weird, but none of the others seemed to think me wanting to look at what Marie really looked like was weird just then.
Recurring dreams of Saffron Dumplings, Marie Pasta, Siobhan Popsicles, and... beans. So weird. But then, dreams are. Dunno why I thought a bunch of cephalopods were watching me eat, either, but... dreams. Fucked up weird. Par for the course.
Woke up with some weird soreness. Probably from trying to hold some really unnatural positions last night. Worth. So, so, worth. Snuggled in to Marie and she responded by gently running her claw tips along my back. I swear wherever she skritched, the soreness just dissipated like it hadn't ever been there. Magic fingers. Magic claws. Whatever.
Saffron took her time waking up as usual, and I found myself watching the whole process, bemused. When she finally opened her eyes with some coherence behind them, I said, "good morning, sleepyhead."
She snorted. "Just because I don't spring out of bed on waking, or go directly and instantly from dead to the world to leaking frenetic energy into the room, or somehow remain awake whenever anyone else is awake to check, does not mean I am a sleepyhead." She then pulled herself up me to give me a good morning kiss. When she pulled away, she said, "love, do you think we should put our art in public spaces, like our dining room, or have a gallery set aside for it?"
"Uh... our dining room?"
She shook her head, pinching the bridge of her nose. "Goddess, forgive me. Along with your Black Dragon and our suites at the Academy and Lancaster House, we've also a small house in Camden Yards and a fairly substantial homestead in the northwest of Lancaster lands."
"Is there a reason we're staying here rather than there?"
She chuckled. "Other than the fact that we finished little more than the foundation before whatever Fae is responsible for your condition cursed you?"
"Oh. Well, fuck. Wait, you make it sound like I'm responsible for the construction work or something?" She just looked at me. "No." She nodded. "Me? How am I doing construction?"
She opened her mouth, then said, "You know, I think it might be productive to pay a visit to the site, for more than one reason. Would you mind awfully?"
I shrugged. "I got no place to be, and nothing to do but you three. Which is a pretty high priority."
"Okay then. Today we'll visit the site."
After that we got up and started in on bath time. I don't know whether future me liked it, but I found it really soothing. Of course, it got a little less soothing when one of the very adult women wriggled like me drying her was definitely not an innocent bath time activity. Before I could say anything, Saffron's voice whispered in my brain. Just ask Devorah if her mead is ready yet.
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When the... okay, dunno if she qualified as someone I wanted to, but I'm sure somebody thought of her as a MILF, because she definitely had the curves, woman turned to face me, leaning in like she intended on necking, I caught her by the shoulders, looked her in the eye, and said, "so, Devorah. How's the mead coming along?"
Good lord but the woman had the perfect chubby face for pouting. "How am I to make mead without a proper brewery?"
I just shrugged, spun her around, and propelled her toward Marie. Trying to keep things quiet, I kinda mentally whispered back, the fuck is up with that?
She's a brewer, and she intends to move into our homestead when it's ready.
As the next woman in line came over to get toweled dry, I replied, dunno, feels like she intends to do a little more than move in.
Oh, she absolutely intends to brew mead strong enough to get you drunk, then celebrate by Reveling with you. Perhaps with all of us.
That got a bit of a pause out of me. The woman in my arms looked up at me, questioning, but I just shook my head. "Thought of something." As I went back to toweling, I thought back, you almost sound like you're cool with that.
Why wouldn't I be?
I kept drying, chewing that over until I joined Saffron in the tub. "You're really okay with her, uh, her and me..."
"Having sex? Why wouldn't I be? We've had plenty of fun with the boys, and with Devorah there's not even the chance of an accidental pregnancy. Not for us, at any rate." She smirked, and for half a second I had Siobhan in the tub with me.
"The... the fuck?"
"Shapeshifting, love. I guess you haven't quite come to viscerally understand the implications of that?"
I blinked. "I, uh... I guess not. You're not worried I'll, I dunno, run off with her?"
She tilted her head. "Should I be?"
"Oh, hell no! I'm not an idiot." She just smirked at me. "Okay, I'm not that kind of an idiot."
She put her arms around me. Very distraction. Much soft. Wow. "I don't think you're any kind of an idiot, love. What you are is lusty beyond mortal ken."
"I mean, I'm a horny bitch, yeah, but..."
She kissed me, and when she pulled back, said, "I meant that literally, love. You are a Goddess of, among other things, sex, and while I am greedy enough to call you mine, I am not so stingy as to not share your bounty."
"That's... Yeah, that's gonna take some adjustment." She sighed. "What's wrong?"
She shook her head, a sad smile on her face. "It took nearly a year for you adjust, and now it seems we're back to square one. Still, maybe we can take some shortcuts this time?" She whipped out that grin again, and I decided right then to take whatever shortcut she wanted to.
Of course, when we finally got ourselves out of the tub and dressed, both of us in the same kind of uniform that Isnomi'd worn the other day, we discovered pretty much everybody who'd slept over in the living room waiting for us. "Anna," Saffron nodded to one of the women, "I assume there's a reason for this?"
Anna nodded, took a deep breath and took a tiny step forward. "Yes, Imperator. All of us intend to join your homestead. If you'll have us. Yes?"
Saffron nodded. "I've spoken with most of you about that, and so far I've no reason to exclude any of you. I assumed you understood that, but to ease your mind, yes, all of you are welcome once we've shelter for everyone."
Anna nodded. "That's what I wanted to talk to you about. What we wanted to discuss. All of us survived in the wild. Survived in shelters we crafted with our own hands. We want to help."
Saffron frowned, then without breaking eye contact with Anna turned the slightest amount and said, "Marie, please fetch Siobhan?" A few moments later, as Siobhan stepped into existence behind Marie, Saffron said, "we'd intended to visit our homestead today, to take stock of what needs to be done. Would you all like to come with us, to see our new home?"
Everybody in the room froze, like they hadn't expected that offer. Anna nodded and said, "yes, please, Imperator," and everybody in the crowd... they didn't relax, but the tension changed from worry to anticipation.
At that point the kids charged into the room with Isnomi in the lead. "Ma! Mama! Mawa! We wanna go wif!"
Saffron sighed and held out her arms, which Isnomi leapt into. Acrobatic little tyke. "Do you promise to stay together, not just with the other children, but with at least one adult?"
"Yeth?"
"That means no hide and seek. No tag. No games where you get out of sight of one another."
The kid looked a little rebellious, then seemed to realize Saffron wasn't having any of it. She slumped a little and said, "ah tay."
"In fact," Saffron said as she handed our daughter... Our daughter, still not used to that... Over to me, "I want you all to stay in sight of your Mama today. Understood?"
Little Daya looked less than pleased, but she still nodded and joined the chorus of, 'yes, Ma' from the assorted kids.
That's when I noticed an extra blond head in the crowd. While some of the women staying with us had little boys, they were all, like, barely old enough to walk This one had to be Maze's age. "Do we have permission to bring him along?"
Saffron looked and asked, "Liam, go ask your father. In fact, ask him to come along, please?" When Anna looked some kinda way, Saffron explained, "the lands around our homestead are far from tamed. Marie and Lachlan killed a dire bear on one of our visits. I'd rather have too many escorts capable of fighting marauding wildlife than too few."
"Of course, Imperator."
A few minutes later, Liam strode back into the room leading a fuckin' Hollywood leading man. Shit, a pair of them, really, although the dark haired guy in the back looked more 'rugged ugly-handsome' than the fuckin' third Helmsworth brother in the lead. "You had need of us, Imperator?"
"We're visiting the homestead today, showing our future tenants the land and our progress. Some of them have experience with construction, and might be able to help."
"Oh, so no, uh, tunneling today?" I swear the dude looked straight at me, and good fuckin' god did that look make it very clear exactly what tunnel he wanted to explore.
Loki's voice whispered through the back of my head, from what you've discussed with Sigyn and I, it would be more a revisiting than an exploration.
Holy fuck, really?
Loki's laughter rang in my head. Literally, in your case.
Wow. Uh, thanks for the info. He sighed, but didn't reply.
A while later, after confirming that all the kids had hit the toilet, and had shoes or boots with decent leather soles suitable for outdoors, then confirming that all the women had the same, we were ready to go. I may still have been more than a little intimidated by watching Marie cut quarter inch leather with those fingernails of hers. Okay, yeah, intellectually, claws, but even there, claws able to straight up slice boot leather were still pretty fuckin' impressive.
Everyone got in a few concentric circles, kids in the middle, women, including Saffron and Siobhan, in a circle around them, and the Maenads, the boys, and me in a circle around that. I realized right then that for every half dozen people in the circle, there was a Marie. Not just another Maenad in a Maid outfit, but Marie. Weird as fuck. All the Maries shifted, and we stood in the same circles on a broad stone... courtyard, I guess. A hill to the west had a stubby tower atop it, and the east end of the little valley with the big flat stone in the center had been cut away, obviously artificially. Straight lines aren't a natural thing. The mountainside to the north had another cut into it started, and the valley wall opposite that on the south had the stone exposed, dirt piled up to either side, but hadn't been cut into yet.
Right about then Isnomi climbed up her mom, leapt to Devorah's shoulder, then leapt for me, yelling, "Mama! Les go!" I barely managed to catch her before she faceplanted on the stone.
"Go where?"
"Thplore!" She swept an arm out and pointed toward the tower.
I looked at Saffron, who just smiled and nodded. "If you and Marie can keep watch over the children, I'm certain Siobhan and I can show the rest of the ladies around."
I'd like to say some shit about how annoyed I was at being relegated to babysitting duty all day.
But honestly? I loved the shit out of every fuckin' exhausting, chaotic minute of it.