Dear Diary,

Y'know, a lack of action is supposed to be restful. Soothing. Positive vibes even. Instead? Every step I take without something jumping on me winds me just a little bit tighter.

So after Isnomi did her dancing with wolves routine, I scooped her up. The wolves' ears perked, and I caught the edges of a rumble, but the menace looked at it and I felt that rumbling growl vibrating through me, puckering everything that had the ability to pucker, and making everything that couldn't wish it could. "Did Marie teach you that trick?" I asked.

She turned to me, shook her head hard enough to make her curls bounce, and smiled. "Sy an Grace!"

I had no idea who the fuck Sy nor Grace was, nor how they'd taught our daughter how to growl in a register that rivaled Marie's. Still, if she could stand off an entire pack of fuckin' Dire Wolves, I wasn't gonna look a gift horse in the mouth. "You wanna go get some dinner or something?"

"I don't know about Isnomi, but I'm not feeling terribly hungry at the moment. I think I'd rather lie down and get some sleep."

I turned to see Saffron swaying side to side, almost like she didn't realize she was doing it. "Oh, shit. What happened to you?"

She blinked, and that's when I noticed her right pupil was way bigger than the left one. "Translocation failure." A pained smile crept across her face, and she followed that with, "we bumped heads."

"Oh, shit. Are these wolves going to stay cowed if I take you home, Menace?"

She turned to the wolf she'd patted, and its eyes popped open like somebody'd just given it a liquid nitrogen enema. Then she turned to me and nodded. "Oh tay."

I called out to the units clustered behind our dirt wall and moat barricade. "I'll be right back." Then shifted the menace to my shoulders and scooped Saffron into a princess carry. I stepped back to the Academy's Ladies' Infirmary; thankfully Siobhan sat at her desk shuffling some papers around. I lay Saffron on the nearest bed and said, "Sister? I really could use your expertise with Assess Health."

As she stood smoothly and walked over, Saffron tried to sit up. "Ahm," she slurred, then started over again, "I'm fine. Just a little dizzy."

I ignored her and turned to Sister Siobhan. "I think she might have a concussion." I cudgeled my memory for what I'd read it meant. "A... brain bruise? I think?"

Sister Siobhan wove her hands through her little diagnostic prayer, then looked at me, "it seems that she does. Possibly a severe one."

"Will I fuck anything up if I use a Heal Injury on her?"

The Sister shook her head. "No, although I would generally recommend a Stabilize first."

"Time to get down, Menace." Before I could reach for her, she shoved herself backward off my shoulders. I didn't hear her land, but I figured either Sister Siobhan caught her or she managed to land someplace soft. I fired up the biggest Stabilize I could do quickly, then looked Saffron in the eyes and said, "hold still, this might sting a little, Kitten."

I hit her with the Stabilize and she arched her back until only her heels and the back of her head touched the bed, screaming, "OH, FU..." Her scream petered out when she passed out, then flopped back to the bed.

I glared at the Sister. "That didn't look healthy."

She shook her head, "you do put rather a lot of Mana into your Stabilize. It won't kill someone, but it might be a little shocking."

I nodded, turned around, and Shaped a Heal Injury. I poured Mana into it until it glowed, then lay my hand on Saffron's head before releasing it. Her eyes popped open, glowing gold for a moment before slowly dimming to her normal deep brown. I leaned over her; her pupils focused normally, as far as I could tell. "You okay, Kitten?"

She nodded. "I'm a little worried that might have been more than a concussion, but I suspect that much healing would fix anything not immediately fatal."

I sighed, relieved. "Glad to hear it. What the fuck happened?"

She chuckled ruefully. "It seems you and I had the same response to seeing Isnomi standing in front of that wolf. The exact same response, in fact. We both tried to Translocate to the same spot at the same time."

This book was originally published on Royal Road. Check it out there for the real experience.

"Huh. I wonder why I don't seem to have a concussion?"

She just grinned up at me. "That seems obvious, really."

I waited, but eventually broke down and asked, "okay, so what is it?"

She broke down laughing, but managed to force out, "your head is too hard to break."

I snorted once, then broke down laughing myself. "Yeah, that tracks." I turned to Sister Siobhan. "Just to be sure, could you and Doctor DeLeon both double check that I didn't miss anything?"

The Sister nodded. "Of course, Tabitha." She had what looked like a suppressed booger look on her face.

"I don't doubt your ability to Assess; shit, its way better than mine. It's just... she's my wife. And, y'know, the Imperator. I want to make double sure."

The booger look mostly cleared, enough that I couldn't really see it anymore anyway. "Of course, Tabitha. I'll hold her here until both of us have examined her and are sure she's fully healed."

"Can you keep an eye on the Menace until Marie or Grandma," I stopped when the door opened, Marie pushing her cart through ahead of her. "Never mind. Hey, Marie, can you keep an eye on Menace until Saffron's on her feet?"

She nodded and replied, "Yes."

I turned back to Saffron, bending down to lay a gentle kiss on her forehead. "I want to stay..."

She shook her head, "but you need to be back with your troops, to make sure they aren't wolf chow, at any rate."

"Thanks. I love you, Kitten."

"I love you too, Goof."

With that I stepped back to the camp, it turned out that however she'd done it, the wolves hadn't attacked. Looking out just past the light from our campfires, shadows lurked, moving from tree to tree once in a while, but other than some faint crunching which might just be snow settling, I heard nothing. I walked over to where Lancaster stood, right in the center of our troops. "Hey, Larry. Good news, the menace convinced the wolf pack that we're not food. Or, y'know, a threat to their territory or something."

Lancaster just stared at me, disbelief warring with resignation on his face. "Your daughter can talk to wolves."

I grinned at him. "Looks that way."

He facepalmed, but I saw resignation wipe the disbelief from his face. "Of course she can." He raised his voice and barked out, "back to camp. Apparently our little mascot has convinced the wolves not to attack us tonight." A little quieter, but loud enough for me to hear, he motioned one of the Sergeants closer and said, "double watches tonight anyhow. Just in case."

I nodded. "Probably a good idea. Thanks, Larry."

He just nodded, said, "Commander," and walked back toward his units.

No change on the dreaming front. Apparently Mimic likes moss?

The following day, the wolves lurked just within sight, at least some of them. I watched while the soldiers broke camp, and every direction I looked, I saw at least one sitting, laying down, or slowly padding across the snow. From his position in front, Lancaster shrugged his shoulder in an exaggerated 'what do we do now' gesture. I replied by making a 'move out' gesture by waving my hand in a circle once then pointing toward our line of travel. He nodded and his units moved out to start breaking trail.

The wolves shadowed us all day long. At lunch, a few of them actually came up close enough to whine at us as we ate, so I pulled one of the wrapped bundles from my backpack, undid the folds that held it shut, and underhanded it to the nearest wolves from the edge of our rest stop. One of them picked it up and carried it back under the trees. That started a small wave of wolves coming up and whining, and each unit tossing them a few wrapped bundles. At a guess we forked over around fifty bundles. I didn't hear any fighting past the tree line, and none of our soldiers got bit, so I figured that if they were polite enough to ask, it kind of behooved us to share what we had. Better that than becoming wolf chow.

When we headed out after lunch, the wolves kept pace with us again, shadowing us from just beyond the tree line. While we didn't see any wild game, nobody got attacked by wandering predators either, so on the whole I'd call it a good day.

At the end of the day, as we set up camp, Lancaster came back to talk with me. "Shall we feed them again tonight?"

I shrugged. "Seems like a better idea than fighting them if we can avoid it."

That got a weird look on his face, like he felt some kinda way about what I'd said, but didn't want it to show. "I am concerned, however."

"Why?"

He shook his head as if arguing with himself before saying, "this is a big pack; big enough that they felt confident enough to try to scare us out of their territory. But even a pack this big should be out of that territory by now."

"Okay, so they're going a little above and beyond. Why's that a problem?"

"There's still no game."

I sucked at my teeth a second. "Ouch. Hadn't thought of that. You think we should keep double watches out?"

He sighed, but replied, "yes, ma'am, I do."

I tugged at the bottom of my jacket and said, "make it so." He saluted and walked off with not even a suggestion of amusement. Worst part about being Isekai'd? Nobody gets your funny references.

Saffron and Isnomi came around again after dinner. She greeted me with a kiss, then leaned back with her arms around my neck. "Thank you, Goof. I wasn't tracking very well last night. From what Doctor DeLeon tells me, you saved me from death. Or possibly even worse, idiocy."

I smiled down at her, "idiocy is worse than death?"

She shrugged. "If I die, my soul goes to my Goddess. If I get brain damage and no one can heal it, I'm useless."

I shook my head. "Not to me. Never to me, love. For better or worse, I'll always love you."

She smiled up at me. "I know that, Goof. Just like I know that if I die, I'll see you on the other side."

I didn't really have a response to that, so I just kissed her until it left us both breathless. When we came up for air, Saffron looked around, a little puzzled and a little concerned. "Where's Isnomi?"

An awful suspicion gripped me, so I took Saffron's hand and led her to the edge of camp. Where we were greeted by the sight of the big wolf from the day before, running as fast as it could in loops around the camp, with Isnomi clinging to its back and squealing with glee.

I barked out a laugh, and Saffron looked up at me. "You're far more sanguine about this than I am, it seems."

"Nope. Just remembering The Mother's Curse."

She gave me a look and drew back a little. "What's that again?"

"I hope when you have kids, you have one just like you."