Dear Diary,

"Before you pursue Vengeance,

First you should seek out Justice,

When Justice fails, then Vengeance."

Doctrine of Tabitha, Book of Vengeance

Yeah, maybe not the most elegant way of saying that, but then I'm not the one who came up with this weird ass meter. But I definitely want people looking for the best solution before looking for the worst one. Shit, I'm not even one hundred percent sure what Justice is all the time, but I gotta say it's gonna be better than Vengeance, at least in terms of what's going to be better for the most people dealing in good faith in the long run. Like, yeah, Vengeance feels good. It makes you warm when everything's gone cold, but it does that by lighting the fuckin' world on fire.

Which... yeah. Maybe. If the world has turned into some kind of people hurting machine, and the only way to stop it is to set it on fire? Sure. Okay. I'll be right there with the Molotovs. But... that's just it, most of the time the entire world isn't a people hurting machine. Yeah, there's always gonna be a machine in that abstract metaphoric sense, and holy fuck do I now want to look at the inside of the halls of government to see what they look like in so-called Metaphoric Space, but Victorian Britain aside, it's pretty rare for somebody to build a machine just to hurt people. Usually they're building it for something else entirely. Yeah, a lot of the time the something else entirely is 'more money and power for people with money and power', but ever since the invention of Madame Guillotine, the smarter people with money and power have learned that there is in fact a reason to build, say, Disneyworld instead of the Soylent Green factory.

But sometimes you do get times where whoever is in power has turned the world into a people hurting machine. Sometimes it's incidental, sometimes it's a side effect of somebody's grab for power and wealth, but sometimes the cruelty is the fucking point. At that point, the machine has to go. At that point, if asking to have the machine disabled, dismantled, destroyed doesn't work, it's time to pull out the cookbook and get to burning shit. And sometimes, that means somebody diving into the machine and wrecking everything until everybody who isn't being fed to or by the machine gets so upset that they shut the machine down just to get some fuckin' peace and quiet.

Yeah, nobody's gotta tell me 'life is shitty'. I'm doing my best to make life here in the new world I've found myself in less shitty than the amazingly more shitty version of life they'd produced here. Honestly, I'm not sure why I'm doing it, but my gut tells me that's what I want to do, and other than 'I might get hurt', my brain can't come up with a good reason not to. And when it comes to getting hurt? Been there, done that, amazingly do not have a forehead scar to memorialize it.

So yesterday after legitimate sadness about no longer being able to see or feel my Murder Mittens' murder mittens, and vocal complaints about not seeing any Trolls, I focused on keeping all my fuckin' tentacles back behind... Okay, I picked the biggest one and dragged its tip along the ground like maybe a quarter its length away from where my smallest tentacles sprouted from the ground. Then I stepped to the Mortal Realm, nearly shat myself as gravity decided to be a bitch about things, stepped back to M-Space and caught myself, stepped to the ground, stepped back to the Mortal Realm, used one tentacle to pick myself up, which was really stupidly difficult for some reason, then used another to turn the faint disturbances into an actual line in the ground. I'm pretty sure that line was closer to Rich Man's Port than Calverton, and I could kinda see both from this altitude, but at that exact moment I did not give a shit about that, only about giving my tentacles a literal line they weren't supposed to cross.

No idea if it would work, but... Due diligence done, I stepped back to Saffron and pulled her into my arms. "Let's go home."

Marie scooped Siobhan up, and a moment later the four of us stood in the bathroom, where the Maenads had already begun combing each other. The ladies, who'd been putting bath time together, gathered around when we arrived, and I think the only reason we didn't get a cheer was the size of the room. All of them gathered around like they wanted to touch us, like seeing us wasn't enough, wasn't confirmation that we were, in fact, back.

After a few minutes of that, Saffron hopped to the edge of the tub and clapped her hands. "Everyone, the water is ready; we can talk to each of you as long as you need while you're bathing. Anyone with any health concerns please speak with Sister Siobhan."

I'd say nobody looked happy about that, but honestly they all looked pretty happy just to have us back, and there wasn't any of the grumbling you'd normally expect. Just some quiet sighing and shuffling into something resembling a line. The kids came through first, although tonight Maze went first and Menace brought up the rear for our six and the dozen other kids; over half of those belonged to the women who lived with us, but at least four others had joined us tonight, including a blond boy about Alex's size. Definitely had the whole 'Lancaster' thing stamped on his face, and I vaguely wondered if he belonged to Larry, Lachlan, or their dad.

Of course, when I heard Maze call him 'Liam', that just confirmed my Lancaster suspicions without telling me which Lancaster had spawned him.

The kids each gave Saffron a big hug when they got in the bath, which didn't really surprise me. All but Menace and Maze did the same with me, which did, kinda. Menace leapt up to cling to my shoulders and rubbed her face across mine, and Maze waved me down and bumped her forehead against my chin, then my forehead. Then the women started hugging Saffron, and I surprised myself by not getting bothered, either of the jealous or 'hot and' variety. Then they came to me to get toweled dry, and I got the same kind of treatment; a firm hug where they leaned their face against my chest for a bit, almost like they wanted to listen to my heart beating or something. Really weird, but not in a bad way.

Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

Then Devorah got in the tub, and I swear to fuckin' god Saffron dommed her right the fuck down into behaving rather than turning the tub into a literal fuck tub.

That would be because your collective agreement is for after she's delivered her first batch of mead.

You're shitting me. Really?

It is, in fact, something we spoke briefly about once. Well, you spoke with Sigyn while visiting me. The 'collective agreement' was between yourself, Saffron, Marie, and Devorah. I don't believe Siobhan had yet joined your family.

Oh. Wow. Uh, maybe I should talk to her about that?

If you wish, it couldn't hurt anything. I'm told communication is key in maintaining healthy relationships.

Good advice. Thanks, Dad. You're the best.

I know.

Then Devorah swayed her way across to me, and I caught her with a towel between us when she 'slipped' and almost faceplanted into my tits. "Devorah," I said, quiet enough it wouldn't get everyone's attention.

"Yes, Champion?"

"How's that mead coming along? Ready yet?"

She frowned, and I got the idea that vague anger was all that kept her from sorrow. "I've not even collected the honey. I'll still need equipment for a proper brewery."

"Just a minute." I covered her head with the towel and rubbed her hair dry. Kitten? Do we have enough money to get her brewery set up?

A throaty chuckle reverberated through my head. Eager for after, are you?

NO! I panicked a little. I just want... she's upset. Sad. I don't want her to be sad.

So kind. She sighed, but not like she was upset. More a sigh of satisfaction. Tomorrow, then, I will take her to acquire her brewing equipment.

Really? Cool! Thanks, Kitten!

In response she just grinned at me as she scrubbed Anna's hair clean. I pulled the towel down from Devorah's mostly dry hair and wrapped it around her, trapping her hands before they could wander. Then, as I rubbed her dry, I leaned in and whispered, "tomorrow the Imperator will take you equipment shopping."

Weird, how even with somebody I wasn't really all that attached to it made my whole day better when she smiled like that, like someone had just told her that everything was gonna be right with her world. Or maybe I was more attached to her than I realized, but I couldn't remember it. Or maybe I'd taken a little trip to a river in Egypt when I wasn't looking.

When I finally got my turn in the tub with Saffron, with Marie combing out Siobhan's hair and everyone else gone off to bed, I murmured, "what's going on 'after' with Devorah, again?"

She just grinned at me and said, "what do you think, Goof?"

She scrubbed at me playfully, and my cheeks warmed as I thought about it. "Really?" She nodded. "Really, really?" She giggled a little, nodding again. "You're not jealous?"

"As I've told you before, and no doubt will again, you are mine, now and forevermore. And I am yours. Whatever just happens," she snickered, "with anyone else affects that not at all. Anyone else partaking of our bountiful appetites can, at best, share in our joy." She spun me around and went to work on my back, which felt incredible as knots loosened under hot water and kneading. "Every time you've done anything of the sort, even in the most offhand of ways? It has only served to heighten our enjoyment." Her hands found the perpetually stiff spots at the juncture of my neck and shoulders, the ones I hadn't even realized were there, and I kinda melted back into her. "Really, you've totally missed the question you ought to be asking."

"Asking who?" I murmured.

"Yourself. Me. Marie. Siobhan."

That tried to perk me up, but the combination of hot water, deep massage, and Saffron proximity totally ruined any chance I had at coherence. "Whassat?"

She leaned in to my ear. "Will our Devorah be a passing fling, an occasional dalliance, a sometime Revel partner, like our boys Lachlan and Linus? Or should I plan on making our sleeping quarters just a little larger?"

So many parts of my tried to tense up at that. I really wanted to be all 'oh, no, must do something, say something, anything', but then Marie walked by Siobhan tucked into one arm, and ruffled my hair with her other hand. Eventually my eyes slid open as my head slipped half under the water, Saffron running her fingers through my hair to wash away accumulated grime. "D'ya care?"

She smirked at me. "Of course I care, love. But to answer the question I think you meant, rather than the one you could force out of your mouth at the moment? No, I've no opinion. She is, after all, not to my normal tastes. Although..." she pondered while she scrubbed my scalp. I think I fell asleep for a while. When she hoisted me up to pour water over my head to rinse me off, that woke me up just enough that when she turned me around to face her, and pulled my lips down to hers, I understood what she meant when she thought, but she is sort of to yours, though, isn't she?

Dreamt of being really annoyed at myself for stopping myself from stealing the neighbor's edibles. Also, had the munchies, and totally nommed all available High Priestess Treats. Worried about that a little, but only in a vague sort of way. Weird dreams.

Today, while Saffron took Devorah shopping, and Siobhan went to work at the Academy, I travelled with Marie and the rest of the women to the Homestead. I spent the morning slicing out chunks of the caves we'd been cutting into all three hillsides, then using the stones produced to fill molds small and large with molten rock. In the afternoon, as they cooled, the Maenads took me around to show me how they'd been cutting slots into walls for steps. Like, straight up using their claws to carve out two-inch deep slots in the shape of the smaller blocks I'd made, then shoving one end of the block into the hold. When I asked Marie how they'd keep them from coming out, she said, "Bond." Then looked at me expectantly.

Kitten? How do I bond the steps into place?

Oh. Here, let me. Pay attention. And she used my hand to Shape Mana into what looked like some kind of magical superglue. I'm sure she'd shown me that before when we were putting the basement roofs on, but my brain hadn't grokked it. I really hoped I was just, y'know, being a dumbass and not forgetting new shit because of the curse. Still, it was nice doing my part to build stuff. No idea why bonding shit together felt like 'making stuff' where turning piles of rocks into big stone slabs didn't, but it did.

Felt nice.