I rolled away from the bare-fisted, animalistic brawl. Phlegm grabbed at Nigel barely scratching his leg. A scratch, however, is not what I felt. The moment the goblin’s claws scrapped across the gnome's skin the bone in my leg cracked. I howled in agony, my head filled with shrill screaming as the black and red dots came to dance, hiding the night-darkened yard from view.
I’d put so much effort into keeping Nigel safe on the long trek from Oliver’s Rest to Stanthorpe. The single point from my There’s No Place Like Home quest, ‘every scratch he sustains you will feel tenfold’, played over and over inside my head on the long journey. He’d not gotten so much as a splinter or a bruise the entire time, unlike the rest of us. I’d let my guard down in the warm safety of the inn. Now I was paying for that distraction.
I crumpled to the ground in a ball, clutching my broken leg as the goblin and the gnome hissed and howled and swore and batted at each other. Nigel shot fireballs at Phlegm’s ass and in response the goblin slapped the little man in the pointed hat across the face.
I whimpered as my jaw dislocated. The pain was almost as intense as my leg breaking but it was joined by the uncomfortable sensation of my teeth being misaligned. I tried to yell at the pair to quit their useless feud but all that came out was a garbled slur.
My health bar was dropping fast. A claw sliced Nigel’s arm and suddenly mine was hanging on by little more than a thread of muscle and skin. Blood spewed from the near stump, soaking into the dry ground below me.
“Stop it!”
Nora charged across the short place and snatched Nigel and Phlegm. Her muscles bulged as she kept the pair at arm's length from one another. The creatures fought her but neither was strong enough to break free of her hold. Phlegm let out a string of curses and Nigel retaliated with another finger bullet blast. Nora screeched and shook the gnome to force him to stop.
I moaned and coughed up bile as the world spun around me in warped patterns that were far from natural.
“Can’t you see what you’re doing to Joe, stop it right now!”
A cool hand pressed against my forehead. “He’s burning up.”
“Theo, get him to Sob, now!”
The voices sounded very far away. Something heavy was laid across my chest and then suddenly I was flying. Is this was it felt like to be on a roller coaster? I’d never been on one before. Whee! The dancing dots shifted enough that I could see Theo’s chiseled chin above my head.
I reached up with the only hand that would listen to me, poking the sharp line. “You’re so pretty, like a superhero.”
“Ahh, thanks I guess.”
“How is he?”
I knew that voice! My head swiveled and Jacob’s blurred image came into view as he ran out of a building followed by an enormous black smudge.
I giggled. “Jacob! I’m as blind as you now, see?” I waved my hand in front of my face making myself feel dizzy. “Now we both need glasses.”
The pain came back in a vicious wave I’d not been expecting. It felt like someone had jammed a knife into the place just below my ear where my lower jaw joined the rest of my face. The stabbing pain grew, traveling down my body, and turned to burning as it passed my leg. Give me loopy and weak of agony any day of the week.
I groaned and closed my eyes wishing the darkness would hurry up and take me. I couldn’t stand the waiting, or the not knowing when or even if it would end.
The welcome blue flash of Sob’s healing magic brought me back from circling the brink. My eyes popped open and I struggled out of Theo’s hard grip, landing hard on the ground. My leg was no longer broken and my jaw, while still very tender, was back in place. I worked it a few times, testing the way my teeth lined up. My health bar wasn’t full but it was at least over half which was nice.
I turned my thumping head and reached up to stroke Sob’s nose. “Thanks.”
The horse snorted and swung his tail, looking at me with an electric blue eye. I scratched my head. Were his eyes always that color? Satisfied that I was well enough now the horse turned and returned to his stable, shoving his long face into a sack hanging from the door. I turned and muttered thanks to Jacob and Theo as we walked around the building together.
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Theo gave me a sharp nod but Jacob ignored me completely. His thin brows were dipped and his eyes were staring far off into the distance. I wasn’t sure what had put that look on his face but I wasn’t about to touch it.
Nora was still standing where we’d left her, her arms still held out like rods of steel as she kept the two small creatures apart. Miranda wasn’t far from her, using the corpse of the Common Striped Cobra to keep a suddenly feral Taki away from the others. No matter how the goblin sunk his tusks into the cobra’s coils, the snake didn’t so much as flinch. I don’t know why Miranda’s magic still surprised me. I guess it's just something you never really get used to.
What was odd though, was that the carriage driver didn’t seem at all interested in joining the fray. He sat up high in his comfortable-looking seat and licked his finger to turn another page in the book he was reading. I was grateful of course, but it was still weird.
I walked to Nora and grabbed the little gnome that was my problem and mine alone. I walked to the fence and took a single step past the boundary. I turned back to face Phlegm and Taki.
“The gnome is off your property, you don’t have to worry about him anymore,” I said.
“The hell they don’t! Let me at ‘em. Let me go your giant pink toad! I’ll kill all of them and take their stuff.”
Phlegm straightened his vest and rose to his full height; it wasn’t much, maybe half of Theo’s. He pointed at Nigel and hissed, “step one gnarled foot over that line gnome, and I’ll stuff you full of garlic and roast you over the fire!”
“Don’t you threaten me with a good time you mutilated sentient snot rocket!”
Phlegm’s cheeks turned a little greener at Nigel’s screech. The goblin spat on the ground and marched back inside, tugging a still-thrashing Taki with him. My party members hesitated as they all looked between the inn and me.
“Go on. Eat and sleep. We’ve got a whole new Croc-infested city to explore come morning,” I said.
Nora’s eyes burned with indecision until she threw up her hands and followed the pair of goblins into the inn. Everyone followed her. Miranda tossed me a sad smile and Theo a wave. I smiled like I wasn’t furious that I couldn’t follow them. Stella, my ever-faithful girl, trotted out to stand beside me. I bent and stroked her head before turning and eyeing the building beside the inn.
The door of the whitewashed place was blocked and the windows bared, but the roof was a relatively flat design and there was a sturdy-looking drainage pipe leading right up to it. I looked from the pipe to Stella and back again. Somehow, I didn’t think a sling was going to help me much this time.
“Oh for fuck sake, start climbing. I’ll tether her to us,” Nigel snarled, yanking on my ear.
I shook him off and without a word started climbing. For whatever reason, I didn’t doubt that he’d help me. We had a bit of a love-hate relationship going on. Or maybe angry dependency would be a better term for it. Whatever it was, we were stuck with each other until I dropped his ass on his doorstep in Perth.
I glanced down when I’d made it halfway up and bit back a laugh. A golden band of magic streamed from Nigel’s finger, curling around Stella’s neck like a fancy collar and lead. She floated not far from my feet. There was concern in her brown eyes but she was unharmed and focused on me, her paws paddling at the air like she was trying to swim.
I scurried to the roof of the building and rolled behind the towering chimney. Stella dropped down beside me, the golding lead disappearing as Nigel cut off the magic. I spread out my swag, hoping the chimney was sturdy enough to keep me from accidentally rolling off the roof. It was only two stories even if I did. A few broken bones, so long as it wasn’t my neck, were survivable with Sob so close.
I yawned and curled under the stiff blanket. Stella rolled onto her back beside me and snugged up against my side. Thankfully, there didn’t seem to be too many mosquitoes about; it was getting a little chill for the devilish little blood-suckers.
Nigel stole a corner of the swag for himself, still muttering quietly to himself about the fiasco down below.
“What’s your problem with goblins, anyway?” I asked, not really caring much if he answered or not.
“The idiots think we stole their magic. No matter how we told them it was their own God that stole it from them, they didn’t believe us. No skin off our nose though. Who wants to play nice with a horde of green, two-legged boars anyway?”
“That’s stupid,” I mumbled, closing my eyes against the blanket of stars overhead. “Stealing magic isn’t even a thing.”
“Of course, it is, you fucking dunce. How do you think Melumek filled this place with magic? He sure as hell didn’t give up any of his own, no, he stole it.”
“From the goblins?”
“No, urgh, shut up. It’s too late for talks like this.”
“Agreed. Good night.”
My stomach rumbled noisily. I pressed my hand against the small pain, willing it to go away. Food would have to wait. I pictured the roasted boar inside the warmth of the inn and my mouth began to water. It was almost like I could smell it. There better be some leftovers for me come morning or I was going to start backstabbing people left, right, and center.
“Stop moving,” the gnome grumbled. “You’re a shitty bedpartner.”
“Never seemed to bother your mum any,” I said.
“Fuck off.”
“You started it.”