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Outback Joe vs the Toilet Croc Invasion
Chapter 102 – An Underground Foray

Chapter 102 – An Underground Foray

You’re not going to believe this but halfway through the string of my best swear words Kendrick walked out the door. I know, crazy, right? I didn’t know the man knew how to use a door. I muttered to myself and followed him, my frustration growing when the man disappeared along with his fox friends. I followed the footprints they’d left behind but all three pairs stopped a few feet from the door like they’d somehow taken flight.

“Shut the hell up!”

I reached up, stroking Frank’s chest. “Don’t worry, Buddy. If I ever see him again I’ll let you peck out his eyeballs.”

Frank seemed happy with my plan and settled back down. I eyed the sun in the sky. It was still a few hours until sunset. Long enough to start searching for my friends. None of the quests, not even Kendrick’s, interested me right now.

There had been no clues left behind for me in the old safe house so that meant moving forward. I had the semblance of a plan. Nigel had told us where he lived, a little island named Rottnest. Nigel might not be with us anymore but if I found his home, there might be clues there.

I reached the fork in the road and very carefully chose the one that would lead very far away from Ruby’s den. I was never going to walk into a spider monster's web ever again. Even if it belonged to Red. I didn’t need the merchant's goods that badly.

The Croc's dilapidated tower came into view faster than I thought it would. I crept in the short shadows around the edge of the buildings, being careful to stay out of view.

The Crocs were meandering along the paths in the scrap metal they called home. Some of them had donned metal plates as makeshift armor and a few had picked up a two-by-four as a weapon. I’m not sure why enormous monster crocodiles, some of which could literally blast my ass off with giant fireballs, needed another weapon, but here we are.

I waited until the sky became painted in deep reds and deeper purples. One or two stars were visible but it was far from the blanket of constellations of true night. The Crocs were walking in patterns, I could see that clearly from here, but their paths overlapped a lot, meaning there was no direct way I could sneak through without being seen.

I sighed and looked at the rooftops instead. The buildings were close together. Not surprising given the crazy price of land before the Croc invasion. I’d still have to make some pretty impressive jumps but it was doable. It would mean I would miss out on whatever the Crocs were guarding but maybe I could live with that. It was Rottnest Island I was interested in not some unknown treasure.

I found a cozy spot by a few empty barrels (Yes I’m sure they were empty, I checked) where I could see the tower but still remain hidden.

I almost jumped out of my skin when the first explosion hit right as sunset turned to night. It lit up the sky on the other side of the Crocs tower and was followed by another and then another. The first blast was red and each one after a different color. Along with the roars of the Crocs and the thunderous blasts came screams and the sound of steel on steel.

I rose to my feet. I’d seen, or rather heard, something like this before. I tried not to let the excitement get to me as I eyed the darkened street in front of me, looking for the darker patch I knew was there. The smell of burning wood and something akin to burnt hair tickled my nose. Whatever the people were doing on the other side of the tower, it was turning into a real bonfire. Luckily it wasn’t bushfire season or this whole place might have gone up in flames.

I spotted the solid steel manhole cover when it began to move. The sewer people were making another raid on the tower.

I watched them as they made their rush. It took even less time than it had before. They ran in and ran out clutching heavy-looking sacks. The smile dropped from my face when another explosion lit up the street casting a brief beam of light over the small group of six. I recognized the skinny rogue dressed in dark green with a longbow strapped to her back.

Gabby.

Just like the last time, a mage lifted his stick into the air and shot a red firework into the sky before disappearing down into the sewers.

The noise on the other side of the tower switched off like someone had hit the standby button on a stereo. I ran out into the street, grunting as I shifted the manhole and hurried down the ladder hidden within. I paused my mad rush only long enough to replace the manhole cover, throwing myself into impenetrable darkness.

My feet splashed into filth at the bottom of the ladder. I ignored the slime on the walls, keeping my hands there so I didn’t stumble. The next time I found myself whisked off to another Goddess’s realm I hoped it was the Goddess of cats. At least that way I might get a night vision skill.

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Far in the distance, a dull glow disappeared around a corner along with the sounds of pounding feet. I followed as quickly as I could, not bothering to wait for my eyes to adjust. I tripped a few times, sending myself into the stinking sludge that made me rethink all my life choices. I rounded the same corner and paused, frowning as I looked for evidence of where they’d gone.

The sounds of the group's escape echoed down the long tunnel, sounding as if it came from every direction at once. There was no light to guide me this time and once the sounds had faded to nothing I stood helplessly lost in the darkness.

“Well fuck,” I whispered. “Where do we go now?”

Frank pecked my ear but didn’t offer up any solutions to our problem. I’d call him useless but let's be honest, he’d saved my ass more than once.

The sound of steel-clad boots splashing through the water had me pressing up against the cold slimy wall. Light appeared behind me, followed by a string of warriors led by none other than the giant that was Theo.

I focused on my Shadow Eye skill and found a bunch of silver sparkles lighting up a hole in the wall surrounded by loose bricks. I ran to it and shoved my bulk inside, pinching Frank’s beak shut to keep his protesting shrieks at bay.

I stayed there in the groove of stinking damp soil as the warrior party raced past. Not a single one of them saw me. When they, and their many lit torches, passed me I climbed out of my hiding place and followed them at a distance in the shadows. The loud clanking of their armor hid any noise from my pursuit.

They rounded so many bends I started to feel dizzy. We crossed a high bridge over an endless pit of darkness and then down more of the same tunnels. Somewhere in the distance, I heard the roar of rushing water. The further we ran into the sewer the less broken, smelly, and layered in filth it became until it could have been a hall in the bowels of Condamine Castle if you added a few windows.

“Watch your step up ahead,” Theo's voice rang out. “Don’t need to lose another to the drop.”

I had thought his words had meant we’d come to another bridge but instead, it was another pit crossed by a long wooden plank barely wide enough for a single foot. The group formed a single file and gingerly crossed the plank one by one. There were more than a few swear words tossed around as they made the deadly crossing. I stood back, watching from my place in the shadows with a smirk on my face. Seeing a bunch of heavy, iron-clad warriors trying to perform a gymnastics routine was hilarious.

Frank ruffled his feathers and shifted his feet, the barest of sounds leaving his beak before I clamped my fingers down on it, silencing him. Theo stiffened at the noise, rising to his full height and looking back our way. I shifted quietly, pressing up hard against the wall so he wouldn’t see me.

“Captain, aren’t you coming?” one of the warriors called from the other side.

“On my way,” Theo said, frowning as he turned and made the crossing far more expertly than the others had.

He turned back on the other side, holding his torch high to light more of the cavern before the stiffness in his body left and he took the lead once more.

I slipped from my hiding place and shot across the plank with ease. A simple trap like that wouldn’t bother a rogue or even a warrior, but it would keep a Croc at bay. I assumed, given the crumbling remains of what must have been a bridge that I could see on the edge of the abyss, that keeping Crocs out had been the main purpose of the downgrade.

I followed them for what felt like a long time before I slowed at a bend. The clustered torches lit up the tunnel ahead in a bright light and I could hear the group gathered about. When the light began to slowly fade I peeked around the corner. Theo stood at the end of a short hall, holding open a heavy iron door, ushering his teammates through it ahead of him.

He looked a little different than he had the last time I’d seen him. His armor had changed from silver steel into something made of jet-black metal. His enormous double-handed sword had been replaced by the same type of weapon only now it was spiked along its length like the bill of a swordfish. The biggest change though was a long scar traveling from his left temple down through his eye down under his nose and over his lips. It was healed over but was still a deep red color highlighted by the glow of the torch he held. He wore a black eyepatch over his damaged eye like a pirate.

I used my Identify skill on him, my mouth dropping open at the dancing golden words it revealed.

Theo Thundershield – Level 35 Champion warrior

I guess I wasn't the only one who had gained a few levels.

I hesitated, not sure if I should just go out there and face him or if I should stay low and scope out the situation first. Frank decided for me.

The moment the last person had run through the door and Theo was spending a silent moment watching the hall for any stragglers, Frank screamed.

“Shut the hell up!”

I flinched as the shout echoed around. Theo slammed the door shut and jammed the torch he held into a bracket on the wall before drawing his enormous deadly sword.

“Who’s there?” He bellowed, slowly easing his bulk in my direction.

I swore quietly under my breath and flicked Frank on the beak, not much caring if he pecked me or not. Theo was the last member of my group I had wanted to see first. Gabby would have been a much better option.

I sighed in my defeat and stepped into the light, lifting my hands to show they were empty. “Hiya Theo, long time no see.”

“You son-of-a-bitch!” The man roared, charging toward me with his sword raised high.