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Outback Joe vs the Toilet Croc Invasion
Chapter 114 – More Secrets, More Lies

Chapter 114 – More Secrets, More Lies

So I’d lost Frank, and Theo had betrayed us all. My friends were either kidnapped or long-dead. I was covered in the god-awful stench of human excrement. The pipes were dark, leaving me practically blind. The sound of rushing water intermingled with a dull hissing sound was beginning to irritate my ears.

I don’t think my situation could get much worse unless a Toilet Croc rushed up behind me and chomped on my tootsies.

I sighed and rolled onto my back, regretting the movement immediately. No amount of spitting or swilling the stale water in my canteen could get rid of the taste of foul muck. How I hadn’t developed some type of infection in all these months, I’ll never know.

I’d given up on the idea of getting through those thick metal bars and breaking into Theo’s quarters. I’d even given up on watching the main hall where Ryan liked to sulk and bellow about. The grate beside my head let in a blast of muggy air from down below. I wished the scent of the plants would make it up here, too, but they weren’t quite potent enough, it seemed.

The growing room was by far my favorite place. It was safe, useful, quiet, and it was beautiful. It reminded me of Mrs. Foggerty’s garden. The crotchety old hag had been a nightmare when I was a boy, especially when she’d caught Rory and me raiding her vegetable garden. I sat up in the branches of the tree that filled up almost the entirety of our yard, staring over the weathered and beaten wooden fence. Mrs. Foggerty must have been some sort of witch. Her yard had been broken up into sections, part of it housed tropical plants, and another held desert dwellers. There was a section for exotic flowers and another filled with nothing but natives. My favorite by far had been the fernery, with its pond full of fish. I’d told myself that one day I would have a matching fernery at my own home. That plan had failed just like all the others.

I wasn’t just here to reminisce about the small joys of my childhood, though. I was here because it was where Tanya seemed to always be. If anyone could draw a little more information out of Theo, it was her. It might not seem that way after the way he’d rudely kicked her out of his quarters, but I’d seen the way he looked at her the last time I was here. When he was done wallowing in self-pity, he would come here. He would seek her out like a starved man did a meal.

I could hear Tanya humming as she moved about the growing room. I had wondered before what kind of skill she had that made her Ryan’s equal in The Outsiders. Now I knew; she was a gardener. Not just any gardener, either.

I glanced through the bars of the grate, using my Identify skill on the powerful woman.

Tanya Miller – Level 48 Divine grower

Most players with a crafting class had the word ‘crafter’ in their title. She didn’t, which implied her skill was something else. God-given if the divine part of it wasn’t lying to me. I already knew at least three gods were using us like playthings; why not one more?

Her level was what fascinated me, though. Here I was, a lowly level twenty-nine, and here she was, closing in on fifty. She put me to shame like no other. Well, maybe Nora could. I was still kind of scared of that curly-haired brunette. I had this sinking feeling in my gut that when I finally found her, she’d kick my ass for taking so damn long to set her free.

I wasn’t looking forward to that day. Or maybe I was. I don’t know; I’ll get back to you on that one.

“Tanya, are you alright? Pete told me about your meeting with Ryan.”

I stiffened, almost shoving my face against the bars to see the newcomer stepping into the room. I recognized her as one of the higher-level crafters. She was standing outside my Identify range, but I was pretty sure she was one of the builders.

Tanya’s humming stopped as she straightened, tucking her pruning shears into her pocket. I wondered about the woman’s storage space. She was wearing nothing but her plain robe and simple boots. No pouches or satchels or even a pretty bum bag like I had. I couldn’t imagine going back to the tiny amount of inventory spots I’d had at the beginning. I had so many now. Every time I found another pouch, I added it to my collection, desperate for extra space. At this point, I was just a big walking pocket instead of a man.

I shook my head, trying to focus on what was being said, cursing quietly under my breath when I realized Tanya had been talking for a while now.

“… to worry about. May I ask a small favor, Kelly?”

The other woman took a step closer, holding her hands folded by her thighs. “Of course. How can I help?”

Tanya didn’t answer right away. She walked to the desk that I’d claimed as my own before I left. She picked up a yellow flower and a small flask of some concoction she’d made herself. The flask was fancier than the ones I’d been given for my poisons. It even had a decorative stopper. She turned back around and walked to the woman, holding out the items she’d collected.

“Give this to Theo Thundershield for me.”

The other woman frowned and looked at one object and then the next. “I know the pair of you were friendly, so I should probably not say anything. I heard the man screaming at someone in his room and throwing things. I don’t think he’s the same man you were friends with.”

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I clenched my teeth together at the thundering look that washed over Tanya’s face, bracing myself for what was to come.

“The man has done nothing but fight for all of us since the moment he appeared on our doorstep. Since that day, he has lost every one of his friends to vicious monster attacks, and now, when he is already stressing over Joe’s disappearance, his daughter goes missing, too. Do you think you would fair any better, Kelly? Do you think you could resist the bottle if you lost Carl?”

Kelly was shaking in her Croc-skin boots as she stared at Tanya with reddened cheeks and tears in her eyes. “You’re right, I’m sorry.”

Tanya straightened her robe in a not-so-subtle attempt to calm herself before she spoke again. “Tell him I am here for him when he is ready. Whenever that might be.”

Kelly bowed her head and turned, shouting over her shoulder, “Of course, right away.”

She’ll never look at you the same way again, I thought to myself. Tanya seemed to agree with my unspoken musings because she swore like a sailor and dropped her head into her hands.

Want to see a cool trick I figured out while bored out of my gourd? Of course, you do.

Feeling bad for Tanya, I stuck a hand into the deepest patch of shadow wrapped around me and closed my eyes. I called for some help. Nothing too serious, I mentioned to the aura on the other side. I wouldn’t want to summon the big guns when all I needed was a mouse.

When I drew my hand back, a small glob of shadow came with it. The little spot whirled and fell in on itself like fog confined in a ball. I lifted the glob to my mouth and whispered what I wanted before dropping the shadow through the grate.

Don’t get too excited. This was a party trick at best. It didn’t have any practicality in battle that I could see, but it might be useful for scouting missions or the like.

I watched as the glob slithered through the shadows cast by the clustered plants. It plucked the orchid I had my eyes on and dragged it with a black tendril as it moved to the desk. It had barely placed the orchid atop a notebook there when its time ran out, and the glob vanished without a sound.

It was an odd new trick that didn’t come with any type of skill. The Goddess hadn’t been lying when she’d told me I could command the shadows. I would have to keep practicing to see how far I could take it. I’d also have to be careful not to piss off the Goddess. As much as I hated her, I didn’t want her to take away everything she’d given me.

Tanya found the orchid almost immediately. She fell into the chair at the desk and picked it up, running her fingers carefully over the smooth stem and delicate petals.

“Why won’t he confide in me?” she asked the orchid as though it were a person. “He doesn’t have to do it all alone. I know he was upset about lying to Joe, but he shouldn’t just toss me aside like this.”

I clutched at the bars. She knew! Theo had had the gall to tell this almost complete stranger but had not confided in any of us, not even his own daughter. Come on, Tanya, tell me more.

Tanya reached out and placed the orchid in a jar filled with water at the edge of the desk. She stood and walked over to one of the human-sized flowers that seemed to want to chew on people. The petal shook and dove toward her, but with little more than a gentle stroke, Tanya avoided being eaten. She even gave it a scratch near its stem, like someone scratching a pet under the chin. She left the room at a slow pace, her mind clearly elsewhere.

I rolled onto my back again, this time a lot more carefully than I had before. What an unbelievably distended asshole Theo had turned out to be. I’d thought highly of Tanya before. Now it felt like I should be lumping her in with Theo in the betrayer category. I needed to focus on making better friends. Clearly, that was something I was bad at.

I rubbed at my aching eyes and stifled a yawn. It had been so long since I’d had a proper rest. My mind wandered to the big beds in Theo’s chamber. Maybe I could just give in and walk straight in there. All I had to do was pretend that everything was okay, that he wasn’t responsible for my friends going missing.

I needed more information before I made my strike. I just couldn’t figure out how to get it. My brain wasn’t working. The sweet, hot air pumping through the grate was strangely soothing. I should have been sweating like a pig, but instead, I found it cozy.

“Tanya, are you still in here?”

My eyes flew open. I clamped my hand over my mouth to hold back the snort that tried to escape my lips. I rolled again and blinked through the crust that had built over my eyes at the scene below me, wondering just how long I had been asleep.

Kelly had returned, but this time she looked different. She’d exchanged her simple clothing for dark robes that covered her head. Three others dressed in the same way Kelly was, followed the woman into the room.

“Come on,” Kelly whispered to the others. “She’s not here. Let’s get the stuff and get out.”

“This is so dangerous. If we get caught, we’re dead,” a man whispered in the dim light of the growing room.

“Shut up. If we want to join the Fellowship, we have to do what the big guy said,” a man snapped back.

“I’m still not sure about this, guys. The Outsiders have been pretty good to us.”

“Enough,” Kelly growled. “If you can’t shut your gobs, I’ll shut them for you and go alone.”

“You’re not the boss of us, Kelly. Stop trying to act like you are,” the only other woman said as she followed at Kelly’s heels.

Kelly lashed out with a stiletto knife, jamming it into the woman who had dared question her. The thin blade sunk deep. Kelly twisted it in every direction as the player's health bar plummeted at an alarming rate. Finally, she yanked it free, painting the floor with a spray of crimson. The woman’s lifeless body dropped, her golden hair spilling from the hood as her body sprawled over the ground at Kelly’s feet. A pool of blood quickly formed around her, staining the stone floor.

The two remaining players that had followed her into the room were clutching desperately at each other. Kelly turned to them, angling her blade toward their hood-covered faces.

“Does anyone else want to question me?” she snapped.

Very slowly, so I didn’t make a noise, I drew out a bolt from my bum bag and slipped it into my crossbow, locking it in place. I wasn’t tired anymore. What hunter could be drowsy when the deer had wandered so naively into your camp?