Legendary-level challenge dungeon defeated!
25,000 exp points received.
Level 19!
Level 20!
Level 21!
My head was screaming like I’d just spent a night on the piss. I groaned and rubbed at my temples as I sat up. I gasped, my eyes flying open as I jumped to my feet and hobbled to a tree to let loose the most violent and glorious stream. I groaned again, squeezing my eyes shut and embracing the shiver that moved through my body at the end of it. I felt like I’d been holding that for an eternity.
I zipped my trousers after a hearty shake and turned blinking in the harsh sunlight. I should be more disturbed about being thrown from realm to realm like a tennis ball bouncing across the court but by now it felt like the norm.
It took me a moment to orientate myself. I recognized that building over there. If I followed this path it would lead me back to Ruby’s den and the other way would lead me to the ramshackle Croc tower. I was back in Perth.
I would have hooted my joy but I’d learned a thing or two about making unnecessary noises. Frank flapped his wings from his perch over the building that had once been my crew's hideout. I took the hint, dodging inside and slipping from room to room, looking for danger. The building was empty, which is a good thing because my stomach would not stop noisily grumbling.
Damn, I was hungry.
I crawled into a secure corner and sifted through my inventory, grumbling when I didn’t find anything to eat. I did yank out my canteen and take a long draught, though. It soothed the uncomfortable dryness going on in my mouth.
I was starting to miss the luxury of having no bodily needs. Only the Goddess had the power to take that away. I never thought for a moment that I would rather be there than here.
Frank waddled across the floor and climbed up on my knee as I sat criss cross apple sauce on the hardwood floor. I stroked his feathered chest and looked around. The room was empty and covered with a thick layer of dust. No one had been here in a very long time. I’d hoped it would be different. After the Djinn’s sick marionette game, I found myself desperately wanting to see my friends alive and well. I couldn’t get rid of that haunting image no matter how I tried.
I fingered the crossbow on my wrist, happy that it had made it back with me. It was a nice addition to my growing arsenal. I fingered the hilt of my blade over my shoulder, wishing I had its twin back. It just wasn’t the same with only one. I liked my twin fang style. It made me feel powerful. Like a viper just waiting to strike its prey. From behind of course, where it was safer.
I touched the three lines on my inner wrist and opened up my character menu again, navigating to my skills window. I’d lost a lot in my travels back to this world but I’d gained a little something as well.
Animal charmer
Magic Resistance (I)
Pickpocket
Shadow Eye
Golden Tongue (I)
Gnome tongue
Evasion
Identify
Poison Resistance (I)
Alchemy (VII)
I’d lost Shadow Phantom, Flicker, Rift, Void Vortex, and Phantom Whispers. That was a lot of useful techniques to just disappear into the ether.
I still remembered the words the Goddess had whispered to me before she’d kicked me through that final door and I’d tumbled through space and time to land back here.
“Take my blessing and show the world why you are my most favored disciple.”
I touched the spot in the center of my forehead where she’d planted an uncomfortably cold kiss. The blessing had come in the form of powerful skills. Ones that would set me apart from any other rogues wandering around this dusty hellhole I called home.
I looked at them, reading the descriptions that I’d only gotten a glance of in my spiraling magical journey.
New Skill Unlocked: Grim Kiss
The narrative has been illicitly obtained; should you discover it on Amazon, report the violation.
A kiss can make your toes curl and your heart skip a beat. This is not that kind of kiss. The purple glow will consume you. Plant your lips and inject your foes with a heart-stopping poison.
328 points poison damage.
New Skill Unlocked: Shadow Pulse
A true rogue guides the battle so he always comes out on top. Never let your foes surround you. Let loose a wave of brutal force and push them back, ready for your well-placed backstab.
3-meter knockback on execution.
New Skill Unlocked: Blink
Move with greater speed when avoiding physical attacks. Boosted if the wielder possesses the Evasion skill.
Speed greatly enhanced for 5 seconds.
I was sad not to have anything like Enhanced Shadow Rush. No matter what overusing it had done to me I still had a fondness for it.
Shadow pulse and blink would help a lot if I was ever stuck in combat, which, considering I was a thief, seemed to happen a lot. I wasn’t sure how useful the Grim Kiss would be though. I didn’t plan on going around smooching it up with every Croc or Elemental Jack that got in my way.
“Shut the hell up!”
“Shh,” I berated the bird as I closed out of my character menu. “Let’s not bring the monsters here.”
Frank puffed up until he looked twice his size, glaring at me with his beady little eyes. I glared right back, keeping my ears on high alert for any noise that screamed danger. The world around us was silent though. Not even a breeze filtered through the cramped streets of the broken and deserted suburb.
I didn’t like the quiet but it did give me a chance to open my quest menu. It looked much like it had before, but now with a sad little note. It was a bitter reminder of what I’d lost by being an idiot and going into Ruby’s den alone.
Dead Drop
It’s so rude to read someone's private thoughts, but the diary held some important details. It’s time to go on a hunt for Tony the cable snake man. Just be careful, this guy makes people a little hot under the collar.
The Witch of Evermore
The witch is brewing a powerful potion. One that’s sure to knock the beastly Crocs on their ass. Collect the following items to get a taste of the sweet, sweet elixir. 1 x Vampire Bat Wing. 1 x Gall bladder of a King Toilet Croc. 1 x Venom of the Nightstalker Rattler. Happy hunting.
The Candlestick in the Ballroom
An unholy silence has taken over Old Man Wellington’s manor house. The man was a nut but a long-time collector of all things cryptic. Pay him a visit, and find out what happened.
There’s No Place Like Home
Quest Failed!
I’d never failed a quest before. I guess that meant Nigel had never made it home. The spiteful little gnome had been a pain in my ass but I still felt bad about failing him. I just hoped he was still out there somewhere and not dead. The fact the Dead Drop quest had reverted to the old description did not fill me with much hope though. I didn’t need to be the reason someone had died. No. Nora and the others would have kept him safe. They were all alive, I was sure of it.
The memory of drooping bodies held up by chains flashed up inside my head. I closed my eyes and smacked my head into the wall behind me to clear it away. It hadn’t been real then and it couldn’t be real now.
I looked down at Frank who was preening his silky black feathers. “What are we going to do, Buddy? How are we going to find them?”
Frank looked up at me and shouted, “shut the hell up!”
If I hadn’t minded a pecked finger I would have flicked him on the beak. Could you put a bird in the naughty corner? He and his useless screaming belonged there.
I stood and stretched out my aching muscles. I hated that I’d been kidnapped by the Goddess but I couldn’t sit around and sulk. I had gotten new skills, a lot of experience, and best of all, a shit ton of levels. I was a level twenty-one now. That was an eight-level increase from what I had been before. Maybe it wasn’t that good of an increase given how long I had been trapped there but I was trying to be positive.
“Hey, hey, the golden boy returns!”
I yelped and drew my sword, pointing it at the man who was standing in the doorway. Kendrick only chuckled as he pulled down the black scarf hiding half his face. Sasye weaved through the man's legs and trotted over to me, sitting on her haunches and looking up at me. I smiled and bent, petting the cute little thing.
Then I rose and said, “what are you doing here?”
Kendrick smiled at me, wrinkles appearing around his blue eyes. “You’re sure grumpy. Didn’t like the Goddess’s trial I take it?”
“I did just as good as you. Scratched out your name and everything.”
Kendrick tilted his head back and laughed. I wanted to flick him on the nose. I was pretty sure he couldn’t peck me for it. Was he trying to draw in the monsters?
“Took Sasye’s path I see. Very good choice.”
The little fox perked up her ears at the sound of her name and trotted back toward Kendrick. I didn’t know if he had named the fox after the path or if she’d somehow been involved in it to begin with. I’m not sure how a fox can be sent to a legendary challenge dungeon but who knows? Crazier stuff had happened. A second fox peeked around Kendrick’s leg. It looked exactly the same as the other. So he did have two! Sasye and Captain Fluffers.
“You didn’t answer my question,” I said. “What are you doing here?”
Kendrick bent down and scooped up Sasye, holding her in his arms like a certain villain held his white cat. “Is it so hard to believe that I missed you while you were away?”
“Yes, it is. Now spit it out.”
Kendrick sighed and wandered forward looking out the window behind me. “I have a job for you if you’re interested.”
“And you couldn’t just send a bird?”
“What can I say? I prefer the personal touch.”
“You’re full of it.”
Kendrick chuckled and let Sasye down. He turned to me and placed his hands on his hips, eyeing me up and down.
“You know, we really need to get you outfitted properly,” he said.
“Right, well, if you’re going to beat around the bush, I’m going to head out.”
“Fine, don’t take my advice. It’s your loss. I need you to get something for me.”
“No. Nope. Shove it up your ass. I had enough of that shit back at Castle Condamine,” I said.
“It’s not like that you Jackass. I just need you to get me a helmet,” Kendrick said.
“Yeah, and last time I just had to get you a crown. Easy right? Shove off.”
“Come on, you know you want to.”
“I do not!”
Kendrick laughed again and wiggled his fingers at me. “Too late.”
New Quest Received: Bushranger’s Helmet Cap
Description: The Shadow Walkers need you to find an old dusty helmet. The last known reports place it in Glenrowan.
“Fuck you,” I snarled.