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Outback Joe vs the Toilet Croc Invasion
Chapter 147 – Nightstalker Rattler

Chapter 147 – Nightstalker Rattler

The screech of my sword skidding over the concrete beneath our feet filled the cramped cavern. My swing had gone awry, just barely grazing the giant beast before flying past. Nora was screaming as she dangled over the drop, only held in place by Boopzy’s strong grip. Stella was doing her best but even with her impressive strength, she couldn’t take out a Nightstalker Rattler on her own.

It was on me. It was all on me and I was failing. This isn’t even what we’d come here for. We were supposed to be protecting Gabby and Jacob. That wasn’t going to happen if the snake took us out before we’d even made it to the Outsider’s hideout.

The rattler’s bulbous tail buzzed like an aggressively shaken maraca as it dragged the end of its tail from the darkened tunnel and thumped it on the ground. Stella howled as she flashed across the short space, wrapping her pointed teeth around the tail of the monster right under the hollow bulb of colliding scales. She shook her head and growled, yanking and tearing at the snake's flesh.

The rattler wound itself into a tight spiral before striking out. I Blinked and ran across the distance, using my blade as a shield to protect Stella from the venom-filled fangs. It wasn’t much of a barrier. The snake bared down, using its sheer muscular strength to send me to my knees.

A wall of golden light hit me like a freight train. The snake reared back, letting out a bone-chilling hiss. I dropped my sword as I skidded across the concrete, desperately clawing at the ground with my gloved fingers.

With the hiss in my ears, the musk plugging my nose, and the blinding flashes of blue and gold light my mind was screaming. I couldn’t process all of that combined with the cacophony of noise and my roiling waves of fear altogether. It was too much. My brain had shut off and I was reduced to a pathetic flailing wretch of instinct and not much else.

My feet flew out over the edge of the drop before gravity took hold of me and without a shred of mercy dragged me downward.

“Nora!” I bellowed as I gripped the edge so hard the bones in my fingers creaked angrily.

The snake whipped its tail around, slamming Stella into the wall. Her yelp was enough to cut through the mess that filled my brain. I roared and altered my hold, flinging out my arm and flexing my fingers to release the poisoned bolt I had loaded.

This time, my aim was accurate. The bolt hit the snake's eye, digging deep into the orb until an ooze that looked important streamed out around the shaft in something a little more substantial than a trickle.

Critical Hit!

“Fuck yeah, take that you fat rope!” I bellowed.

The edge of the drop was slimy, making it hard for me to find a better purchase to lift myself up with. Every attempt left me swinging and barely holding on as the darkness below me called my name, summoning me to my doom in the realm of my Goddess.

“Joe, look out!” Nora screamed.

My eyes whipped back around just in time to look into the pulsating maw of the Nightstalker Rattler. I yelped and Blinked, using the small amount of extra time to awkwardly shimmy out of the snake’s path. It overshot me, its head plummetting into the shadows below as its strong tail kept it from being dragged down.

The snake battered an already trapped Stella with its rattle as it beat the thing at a tremendous tempo. I could hear the monster's matching hiss come from below me but refused to look. I had enough fear in me to fuel my desperate clambering without feeding the fire even more.

I glanced up, seeing Boopzy swinging wildly from the pipe. My chest tightened the moment I saw it. Nora swung with him like a pendulum in an old-fashioned grandfather clock only Boopzy’s grip was slipping around her waist, his suckers having trouble binding with her heavy armor. Soon she’d be tumbling down to join the snake in the darkness. Only, the snake wouldn’t be there much longer.

The tip of its forked tongue tickled my ankles. Stella sunk her teeth back into the snake’s tail and let out a second wall of golden light. I had one leg up on the lip of the drop when it hit me, pushing me back to where I had been before.

Screee!

I cried out and jerked my head around so hard that a jolt of searing pain crept up the side of my neck and into the base of my skull. It didn’t matter though, not when Nora was falling. I reached out for her, leaning as far as my weak grip would allow but it wasn’t enough.

Nora flashed past me, dropping like a stone. Her face was locked in a hard glare as she stared at the snake climbing out of the shadows. She took out her axe in silence and as she tumbled she swung it, slamming the curved edge into the coil of black muscle directly behind the snake’s head. Blood spurted as her weight drove the axe even deeper, almost completely severing the head from the rest of the monster’s body.

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I Blinked without a thought, watching as she rose into a semi-upright position atop the snake’s plummeting body and turned her head up to me. The was no fear in her eyes, only sadness. The snake’s tail slipped over the edge, the shadows eating it and Nora along with it.

“No!”

I let go, turning my body and pressing my arms tight to my side to speed my descent. The rattle of the beast fell beside me still buzzing away despite the fact I was sure it was dead.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. The darkness swallowed me just as I wanted it to. Water thundered nearby, pounding hard against a solid surface somewhere in the gloom. I just hoped the hole was as deep as I thought it was.

I didn’t bother speaking inside my head. It wouldn’t be enough for what I wanted. I dug deep inside myself, looking for the pool of power the Goddess had infected me with. Wherever she placed it, she hid it well.

“Lift us up,” I roared into the fissure hearing it repeated back at me by hundreds of other Joe’s just like me.

I felt the little glob of shadow attach to me as I tumbled and a burning rage ignited in my belly at the sensation. I lifted my head, my nose crinkling as I clenched and bared my teeth.

“You send one? I am your Master. You dare disobey?”

Silence followed my cry. From what I felt no other shadow creatures had crawled out of the depths to join my one singular friend.

“Goodbye.”

Nora’s voice was quiet but it still echoed around my ears, digging into me and breaking a dam inside that I didn’t know existed. My hands began to glow through my gloves. A vivid potent purple that was oh so familiar.

I threw my hands out, letting the power infuse me. Below my health bar, my blue magicka bar tripled in size and turned a matching shade of purple.

There was no time to think about it more. I flexed my fingers, letting the power burst from me as I cried, “Save her!”

A pulse of purple light traveled at speed right down to the steel grate that separated this hole from something even deeper. Dark blotches shot from the chasm's walls, flying across the distance to gather Nora from her place atop the snake moments before it hit the grate with a resounding bang.

The snake’s body started to glow with bright golden light. The shadows that cradled Nora shot upwards just as quickly as they had appeared, taking her to what I hoped was safety high up above. I was still falling but to save my own hide I didn’t need to tell the shadows what to do. They surrounded me, lowering me much slower than gravity would have. I adjusted my feet to stand atop the grate without losing a leg to the deeper darkness down below.

My magicka bar depleted, taking my purple glow along with it. My legs wobbled beneath me as the shadows disappeared, bonding anew with their kindred along the walls away from the dead snake’s glow. I bent over, taking deep breaths in a vain attempt to stop the bubbling, roiling feeling filling my guts.

It didn’t help. I turned and let out a stream of Phlegm’s fine cooking and warm canteen water into the abyss below the grate. I dragged my hand over my lips when the heaving subsided, ignoring the blinking notification bell in the upper zone of my field of vision, before focusing on the loot icon hovering by the snake.

New Item Received: Venom of the Nightstalker Rattler x 2

Description: A potent poison milked from the venom gland of a Nightstalker Rattler. Only the brave or the very, very stupid can get their hands on this dangerous toxin.

Effects: Nacrotic Poisoning

New Item Received: Ream of Snake Skin

Description: What colors go together better than black and red? Pull out your needle and get to work crafting your very own, completely fashionable garment.

4,000 gold received!

I smirked at my haul even though in the back of my mind I knew it all belonged to Nora. Maybe when I got up to the top I would share it with her.

The golden glow of the snake disappeared now that its lootables were gone leaving me in complete darkness. A tiny pinprick of blue light twinkled overhead not unlike a star. I was deep in the pit. So deep I wondered if this place even had a purpose in the world I’d once known or if Melumek had decided to place it here for his own amusement.

I smirked again and reached inside, searching for the dam so I could break it all over again.

It wasn’t there.

I frowned and tried again, closing my eyes and saying in the firmest voice I could muster, “Lift me out of here.”

My friend the glob landed on my arm and tried to lift me all on its own. The best it could manage was shifting my arm just a little. One shadow would not be enough to carry me to the top.

“Joe?” Nora's voice rebounded down to me from high above.

“I’m alright,” I called back. “I’m just, umm, kind of stuck.”

“Stuck? How?”

“The shadows aren’t listening to me.”

“Speak English man.”

I muttered and ran my fingers through my thinning hair. How the hell was I supposed to climb up a slimy and almost completely smooth wall? I’d managed the Shadow Goddess’s tower alright but this was a whole new kettle of fish so far beyond my realm.

A weight landed on my shoulder making me yelp and jump back. One leg dropped through a hole in the grate. I fell so fast I couldn’t catch myself. My other leg folded like a cheap lawn chair. The bars forming the grid slammed into my family jewels, knocking the air from my lungs almost as effectively as my many, many injuries in the past had done. I groaned and clutched at them as my eyes watered, rolling over the metal without bothering to yank my leg back through. A jolt of Sob’s lightning fired up my ass would have hurt a lot less. I writhed and slapped out at the thing climbing all over my body, indifferent to the pain it had caused.

“Shut the hell up!”

“Fuck you, Frank.”