I don’t think you can understand how fucking terrifying it is to have a humanoid crocodile chasing after you unless you were there. If I wasn’t putting my all into running, I probably would have shat my pants. The beast was enormous. Almost twice my height and three times as wide.

I think striking it with my whip had only made it angrier, it certainly hadn’t hurt the thing. My arm where it had grabbed me was wet. I didn’t need to look to know I was bleeding. There was no time for that. I had a stallion to tame.

Gordon’s prize-winning racehorse to be exact. He was appropriately named; the stallion had inherited his mother's unbearable attitude. It was the only reason he was kept in this lonely paddock at the front of the property and not in the stables with the other horses. It was also the reason he wasn’t allowed to race anymore. He fought everyone and everything that came near him.

The croc roared and I pumped my legs harder. The fence was right in front of me. I prayed to every god I could think of that I still had some semblance of high jumping skills from my high school days. The electric fence would cook my ass if I didn’t.

I launched myself into the air, turning as I reached my peak, and tumbled to the hard ground on the other side. I yelped at the pain radiating from my shoulder. I’d landed awkwardly on my already injured arm. The croc didn’t stop its headlong charge, barrelling right into the electrified fence. A loud zap and the smell of burnt flesh filled the air as the creature roared and stumbled back, shaking its enormous head.

“Take that you ugly bastard!” I yelled.

The croc hissed lifting its clawed hands out in front of it. It began to stalk around the fence, looking for a way in.

I turned away from it as I pushed up to my feet and scanned the yard. Son-of-a-bitch, the other farmhands and I called him Sob for short, was standing a few feet away from me. The tall midnight-black beast stared at me with murder in his hazel eyes.

I held my hands up in front of me, hoping he wouldn’t trample me. “Easy, fella. Easy. We have a problem you and me. Maybe we can help each other.”

Sob reared, screaming and flailing his forelegs in my direction. I flinched and stepped back. Sweat dribbled down my back and disappeared below my belt on its way to make my crack the most uncomfortable swamp you could ever imagine.

"Listen, buddy," I said, trying to keep the fear from my voice. “It’s either me or that guy.”

I jabbed my thumb over my shoulder at the still stalking croc just in case the idiot horse hadn’t noticed the beast. The croc roared again. I’ve only seen a crocodile in person a few times, but not once had I heard one make that noise. It was just another reminder that the beast on the other side of the fence was not from this world. My tiny little whip seemed like a paltry weapon against a crocodilian alien monster.

I tried to approach Sob again but he screamed and stamped his feet. Yep, I was going to die because this horse hated everything.

“Please Sob,” I begged. “I don’t like this any more than you do.”

Sob snorted and eyed the croc who had seemed to lose interest in us and was now doing something to the porch. The horse turned and stiffened, whacking flies away with a swish of his tail. I approached carefully, just waiting for him to lash out with a bone-crushing kick. Thankfully, he didn’t.

I grabbed the horse's mane and launched myself off the ground, up and over landing with a painful thud right atop my family jewels. I whimpered at the jolt of pain that shot through me but there was no time to wallow in agony. The croc was still hissing at us from its place on the porch.

Words flashed up in my field of vision, just as they had before but I ignored them. A little bell icon flashed up at the edge of my vision, and the words were sucked up to it like some slideshow someone was trying to make fancy.

The croc snarled and a loud thump had my head swiveling. The beast had torn one of the columns clean off the porch. The roof sagged where its support was missing. The croc charged, smashing the column onto the fence with incredible force. The fence sparked, charring the wood but it made a big enough gap for the croc to leap through.

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“Run, Sob. Run,” I bellowed, kicking my heels against his flank.

The horse didn’t need much prompting. He whirled and thundered across the paddock in the opposite direction to the beast. I tangled my hands tightly in his mane, trying to hold on with my knees not my butt, but without a saddle, I was crushing some very sensitive areas. Riding without a saddle was a skill I did not have.

We neared the fence. I closed my eyes and stiffened, terrified of what was to come. Sob launched himself into the air. I waited for the zap of electricity to shoot through me, but it didn’t come. Instead, Sob landed with a solid thud. My butt bounced off his back. Shooting pain blasted up my spine. If it hurt me that badly I shuddered to think what I’d done to the poor horse. If we survived, I’d have to make it up to him. He might be a Son-of-a-bitch, but he was still a horse.

Sob took off at an impressive speed, his hooves kicking up dust. The croc charged after us in its strange swaying gait reminiscent of a gorilla's upright run. Even with Sob’s added speed, the thing was still much too close. Sob rounded the farmhouse. I looked longingly at the machinery shed. Riding the quadbike would be preferable but I couldn’t risk stopping. Sob was all I had.

I tugged on Sob’s mane, urging him to run to the North. He resisted for a moment before cooperating. My mind was stuck on Stella. We had to find her. She was a smart dog, but she wouldn’t survive in the outback on her own.

I looked over my shoulder, slowly we left the croc behind. When we topped a rise, and I could no longer see the beast I sighed in relief.

We rode for what felt like hours before Sob decided he’d had enough and reared, tossing me to the ground. My poor ass must be black and blue by now. Sob snorted and pranced away from me, finding a patch of dry grass to nibble on. I groaned as I pushed myself to my feet, my ass aching and my knees weak. I muttered profanities under my breath, furious that I’d been transformed into an old man in a matter of hours.

I planted my hands on my hips and looked around at the barren landscape we’d found ourselves in. I didn’t recognize any of the prominent landmarks which means we’d navigated away from the cattle station.

I cupped my mouth and bellowed, “Stella, where are you, girl?”

Silence is all I got in return. If you exclude Sob dropping a steaming pile anyway. She had to be around here somewhere.

The little bell was still flashing. I battered at the thing, but nothing happened.

“What the fuck are you?” I snapped.

The golden icon flashed grey and expanded, filling my vision with a mess of words. It took me a moment to figure them out.

New Achievement: Ball crusher

Ouch! That must have hurt! Hope you didn’t want kids.

New Achievement: Riding bareback

You’re on a horse, right? Right? This isn’t that type of game you sicko. Don’t forget, Protection is your friend.

New Skill Unlocked: Animal charmer

Animals now find you 10% less offensive. Only effective against noncombative animals.

I stared at the words for longer than I care to admit. None of it made sense. My brain must have melted into a useless pile of goo in the raging summer heat. Through the mental fog, I was experiencing the same questions kept circling around and around. Where had the toilet crocs come from? What or who was the voice I’d heard? And, most importantly of all, was I just a giant ball of crazy? Maybe a cow had kicked me in the head and all this bullshit was a wild coma dream.

When I was a kid in town, I’d played games on my old consoles. This felt very similar to this only it somehow real. I’d spent hours and hours playing those things, finding it fun to search for all the hidden little easter eggs and achievements of my favorite ones. It felt like I’d been sucked into one somehow. And from what I could tell so far, not a very good one.

I cupped my hands over my mouth again. “Stella, girl! Where are you?”

Sob snorted and swished his tail, eyeing me like I was some slobbering moron who didn’t know the meaning of personal space. When the horse turned its head, I flipped him the bird. He deserved it. I felt a little bit better doing it too. I focused on the little bell again and the words were sucked up again as they had been before. I blinked, a little disoriented to have my full vision back. At least the thing wasn’t flashing anymore.

Fuck, I needed a drink. A ridiculously strong one. Or maybe three or four of them.

I rubbed my aching eyes, fighting back the yawn that was trying to split my face in two. I was uncomfortably weak. I needed food, water, and sleep. Probably in reverse order judging by my foggy mind.

“Stella!”

Sob’s ears swiveled to the right. I didn’t stop to think as ran in that direction, hoping what he’d heard had been my girl. I clambered up a rise and stuck my head over the top, searching the desolate land on the other side. I heard a desperate whine. My eyes shot in the direction of the cry. The reddish dirt was broken by patches of wild grass and stunted trees. The sun was sinking fast, casting deep blankets of shadow across the landscape.

A movement caught my eye at the base of the next rise. There was an odd darkness there. A tunnel I thought. I couldn’t make out what the moving things were from this distance, but whatever they were, they had Stella trapped.

Stella cried out again and before I could think anything of it, I was running.