Chapter 173 – Journal Entry 23: Finding Rest

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The Mistress of Fernery Island, Pandora, was quite lax indeed. Unlike my first impression of her of being 'brutal, without mercy" she turns out to be nonchalant, laid back as if she has no care for the world. I talked to Miss Pandora without any politeness, she just tolerated it and explained the rules of the island. I thought it would be an outrageous rule but surprisingly the rules are just like any town or city.

While talking to me she was taking care of Grom. It is not hard to notice him when he's laying on the lap of the Mistress of the island.

"Hmm, pray tell, is there anything that you want to ask?"

"Nothing really, just that."

I pointed at Grom who is on her lap. She smiled.

"Oh, this brat? Don't worry, he will be fine."

"Brat, I thought you were closer than that?"

"Well indeed, hundred years of getting along, fighting and being angry at each other makes one close, but we are merely fools who decided to take care of each other until one of us perishes."

Somehow it was gloomy, the way she spoke without any care made me questioned. I was curious enough.

"Sounds gloomy, why is that?"

"Can't you tell young man? This brat is merely holding on to life, he has nothing here yet his spirit holds, waiting for something or someone."

"What do you mean exactly?"

I didn't get what she meant at all.

"Have you heard the tale of an old dog looking for a good place to basked in the sun?"

"Nope, not at all."

I have no idea what that means. Is it a phrase in this world?

"Then let me tell you: Once upon a time, there was a hound dog, at first this hound dog was that of noble family, he lived in great condition, got everything he wanted. But one day, the hound dog got lost, his owners killed. The hound dog, without any experience out of his comfortable home suffered, he got kicked, his fine fur blemished, and his appearance turned that of a stray dog. The dog, however, continued living, eating on scraps, until its body fell sick. But at the time the hound dog was sick, he was already old. It was a surprise even to the hound dog how he manages to survive without the spoiled hands of his owners. But even so, as the hound dog stared at the old sky, the hound dog thought that he wanted to find a good place, a good place where he can find the feeling that it once remembered staying under his owner's comfort, the hound dog searched for that place where he could rest, and in a tree that overlooks the sea, that old hound dog rested, the hound dog felt relaxed on that place, and unknowingly the hound dog; whose body was sickened, bruised everywhere find his peace. Unknowingly, the old hound dog found the end of his dream."

Pandora finished her piece. I could tell that there is a bit of sentiment on her words. As if she knew the feeling of that old dog has.

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"So is Grom an old hound dog too?"

"We both are, I am merely looking out for that of own flock. At best, however, he will go before me."

A sad face appeared on the Mistress of the Island. I could not help but really wonder what her true feelings are.

"Some live for wealth, some live for thrill, some live for pleasure, but even so, there are people like Grom, who just wanted to return to the place he once belongs, even though it doesn't exist anymore. Thus; he could only find rest."

"That sounds...weakly spirited."

"Indeed, people are different, and it just turns out that he is a weak willed man, a brat, a failure but yet do you question a man that truly accepts and wants to find his end peacefully? Can you not respect, a dead man's wish?"

"I can, still, is he that truly sick?"

Pandora smiled, she turns her eyes at Grom.

"A corrupted soul, an accursed body, a body composed only of twisted wood and steel, unable to dream nothing but nightmares, a  maddened mind, memories that have bits of shatter. A state that is only kept alive out of a curse."

Hearing her made shiver, an extreme feeling of pity and sadness came to me. I looked at Grom, who is sleeping quietly in Pandora's lap.

"Don't pity him fool, you are belittling him, despite he may is, he isn't saddened. Coming here, have you seen the young ones?"

"Yes, what about it?"

"Even though he may be like this, he has been teaching those young ones not to become him, it may be deprecating using one as an example, but even so, Elena here won't be that much of genius if Grom didn't make himself as an example, teaching them how on what they shouldn't be. Now, you can see that a lot of people, the young ones that have grown up, made an example, making it sure that they won't end in up in a lonely path."

"That is a sad path..."

I could not believe it. That someone would actually take such self-deprecating path.

"It is, is a terrible pathetic path, but that is all he can do, and even with that, I believe that he did his best."

Pandora caressed Grom's head again. I looked at Grom, a feeling of pity, with a mix of respect came about. Pandora made his tale of that of a weak willed man, yet somehow recalling the tale that Elena, Odette told me confused my head on what to think of him.

There was a mix feeling that I could not understand. One may say that I am rather one of those people that can be committed into something. So seeing this weak-willed man, who suffered a lot yet being able to live unknowingly made me somehow confused.

"Don't think about it too much. Ram'am el."

She smiled accordingly.

"Grom's choice is his choice, I am merely looking out for this fool...Sigh, maybe he could become a better man?"

Pandora stared at the sky.

"Well that's done since we are done introducing ourselves can we show him his fields?"

"Ah, pardon, go ahead. I will heal up Grom for a while."

Saying that I left the house-like shrine and went down back to the village. Following Elena, I was led to the fields where I would start working on.