Darkness. Nothing but simple and pure darkness so thick it hid the very thoughts of one's mind. That would be Avrin's simple description of what dying that way had felt like.
Then came a foggy sense, like being pulled by a gentle force and placed softly into a soft bed. Avrin could barely feel himself conscious, trying hard to stay awake, yet he felt that whatever he currently was, he was drifting. Beside him, he saw others drifting too: insects, birds, fish, even inanimate objects like rocks and trees. The odd feeling was they gave off a soft white glow, just like he did. This entire situation was confusing; he wanted to remember but kept forgetting.
This continued for who knew how long as he kept drifting with the other species and objects. That was until he heard a voice in the pure void above, a soft voice of a man. "Found you." Avrin then saw a hand like a human's reach out from the darkness, dwarfing him in size. This hand grabbed Avrin, his very being distorting and rippling like a string being picked up.
The hand took Avrin up and brought him into the darkness. Avrin's mind went blank, the voice speaking again. "Let's give you your memories back." Following that statement, Avrin felt a warm current, then his consciousness remembered. More and more.
His current form was like a humanoid form of energy, yet whatever the voice had done to him, it gave him his human shape back, more and more until he was like he was before death, except wearing white clothing.
The first sound Avrin heard after this change was his heartbeat, then his pulse and that white noise in his head until he raised his hands and looked at himself. He still had that ethereal glow. Confusion was the only thing on his mind at the time. He looked up, seeing a figure sitting cross-legged in a long ragged cloak, their appearance covered, their face dark and distorted like space that was alive. Avrin knew that whatever this thing was, it was not human.
"Hello," the figure spoke up. After nearly a minute of silence, Avrin, thinking for a moment, responded seriously. "Are you God?"
Hearing Avrin's answer, the figure let out a quiet chuckle. "No, I'm not that pitiful."
The answer simply made Avrin more unsure and confused, so he spoke again. "Then you're the devil, right?" almost as if the devil was the only thing that would dare call God pitiful.
"Wrong again, but it's fine. You don't need to know who I am right now, only why I'm here," the being replied, looking thoughtful.
Avrin didn't speak again; they simply eyed each other.
"Avrin, I'm here to guide you to your next life," the figure continued.
Hearing this response, Avrin pursed his lips. How could such answers only give more questions again and again? He wanted to respond but didn't have the words for it. The figure in front of him raised his right hand, which looked human, and pointed past Avrin.
When Avrin turned, he saw a stream of blue light, like a flowing ocean in space, but what made this ocean different was that it was made of other blue lights like Avrin had been. Such a sight made Avrin's heartbeat quicken. Following the source of the ocean, he found it came from the endless darkness. He then looked at where it was going, and it was also the endless darkness.
"Is that—" Before Avrin could finish, he was interrupted.
"Samsara. At least, that is the most suitable concept which you can use to understand it. You can only understand a little of it by looking, but in your current state, you won't be able to see the beginning and end of it. I plucked you out from there. I've been waiting for you... for so very long."
Avrin turned back around, his brows furrowed slightly. "Guide me? Waiting for me? Why would you be waiting for me? Is it because I killed so many? Some fate worse than death, I suppose?" Avrin answered, but he wasn't really sure.
The being laughed at Avrin's response. "What you did was indeed cruel, but there are those out there who have done much worse. In existence, this is nothing new," his tone soon became nonchalant.
Unable to deny anything, Avrin had never met someone so worrisome before. He spoke things Avrin couldn't understand; he might as well speak in riddles. "What do you want from me?" he asked.
The being, as if waiting for this, spoke again. "As I said, I'm guiding you to your next life. I have my own reasons. You should feel honored; no one gets this treatment. For me, Avrin Sygin, you are an investment." The being looked up into the void, speaking up with expectation. "Keep your end of the deal."
When he finished speaking, the void rippled before a heart that seemed to change contrast appeared. It would beat and pulse, sometimes transparent, sometimes negative black or positive white. Gazing at it hurt Avrin's eyes and head, as if looking directly at the sun.
"This will hurt, but only for a moment." The being reached for the heart, then uncrossed his legs as he approached the stunned Avrin. With the heart in hand, he suddenly jabbed his hand into Avrin's chest, no blood gushing forth, seemingly phasing through, yet Avrin felt a piercing pain that spread through his body, like having your bones plucked out or something eating you from the inside. That moment felt like eternity to him.
When the being retracted their hand, the heart was gone. Avrin fell to his knees, sweating heavily, gasping for air.
"That's done. I can't tell you much; doing so will cause some annoying issues, but as you grow stronger, you will learn more."
Avrin clutched his chest with his right hand, glaring at the being. "What did you do to me..." his voice raspy, still remembering that pain.
"I've given you a very good head start, and some notes from someone I used to know. Like I said, you are an investment. You will keep your memories too. It's going to be fun watching you when I have time."
Unsure what else to say, Avrin's brows furrowed cautiously. He didn't doubt whoever this being was, they were akin to a god. "Reincarnation, huh. Some investment. Is this some twisted game for you?"
The being remained silent for a moment, extending his hand again that began to expand until he plucked Avrin up and began to move him towards that stream of samsara to enter the cycle.
"Existence is complex, it can be a curse or a blessing, whatever you want it to be. Avrin, right now for me existence is a gamble." He placed him back with the rest of the souls. Avrin wanted to speak more but found his consciousness fading until he was unable to keep his eyes open. Soon, like the others, he drifted towards that endless void of darkness.
The being watched for a few moments before a voice echoed in the void. "You called me pitiful..." The voice was a little annoyed, almost pouty in a joking manner.
In response to this voice, the being let out a soft sigh. "In the end, we're all pitiful, aren't we?"
Looking at where Avrin's soul was drifting, the being looked interested. "It's always nice to see where a certain soul will head towards. Looks like existence has decided that place for you, Avrin. I'll make your beginning extra exciting to temper you. After that, you are on your own unless someone dares to mess up my plan."
Endless darkness for Avrin. After who knew how long, he found his consciousness returning, yet everything was still dark. He felt his mind and emotions twist, flashes and twists and turns, memories or figments of his rampant imagination. Figures fighting in the void of nothingness, their actions causing space to shatter into fractals, then another of a giant maw devouring a galaxy. He saw a raging inferno burn space and spread, a cry of hatred coming from it.
The next image he saw was the face of a female who was sleeping on a bed of bones, hugging a large bone, her features and attire unclear. The woman raised her head slightly and smiled at Avrin, a look of curiosity on her face. She reached towards him, but the voice of the being Avrin had talked to echoed out. "If you interfere, see if I don't overturn your side, I dare you!"
The woman stopped midway and sighed with annoyance, feigning innocence, but it was clear she took this threat seriously. Her hand lost its skin, turning skeletal before she retracted it and hugged the bone again. The image lasted a fleeting moment before darkness again for Avrin.
Finally, he felt odd. He felt weak and helpless, but he felt comfort and warmth, the beating of a pulse, shuffling and then pained cries. He felt something touch and embrace him before it began to pull on him gently. Soon he felt a bit cold, like the air touching him. He wanted to cry like an instinctual thing but managed to hold it in. He tried his best to understand his surroundings but couldn't do much. One thing was certain: he knew that his current state was definitely that of a newborn.
"A baby boy!" a female spoke with warmth and joy. "Dear Princess, it's a healthy baby boy," she spoke again, but a ragged voice uttered in exhaustion, "Why isn't he making any noise?"
Soon other females began to talk before Avrin heard a door open. "He looks fine. He's breathing. Not crying must mean he is strong-willed like his parents!" the first woman spoke, as if to console the exhausted other.
Avrin then felt some others speaking. The door would open again and again before he heard shuffling footsteps. "My son! Haha, I have a son!. Urganth, quickly check his body!" he excitedly asked. Avrin was then passed to another; he couldn't open his eyes and could only listen in a weak daze.
"Hmm..." Avrin felt a warm current that explored every inch of his body. This happened several times. "My lord, he, uhh..." the individual who held him continued again and again. "Your son, there seems to be a problem."
Having spoken, Avrin was then passed to another. He felt his body scanned again with this odd current. "What... This can't be... There aren't any Spirit veins? Impossible! My son is a cripple!?" a sound of disgust in the tone.
"Fuck you too..." Avrin thought in his mind. Though he was just too tired, he couldn't stop the exhaustion and fell asleep.
He awoke again, a little later to the sound of arguing and things smashing. "This is your fault, I knew my father was right, I shouldn't have married a human!" the man's voice, belonging to his father, was angered and displeased yet sorrowful.
"My fault? You spend years trying to win my affection and now I'm the one to blame for finally giving in!?" his mother retorted.
Avrin fell asleep again, waking up an unknown time later due to hunger pain. He understood his position was not good but he still needed to be fed. He forced a crying sound to which a female servant holding him uttered, "M-mistress, he is hungry."
A reply soon followed from Avrin's mother. "I refuse to feed this useless thing, go find him a wet nurse."
Some time later, Avrin was fed by a prepared wet nurse. He understood his position was not good, his fate unknown. Thinking too hard simply tired his little brain more, so he went with the flow. He wasn't sure how long this lasted, but there was a day he woke when he heard his father speaking up, "My father has already refused to let me rule as long as this child remains, my brothers and sisters are already mocking my failure... Damn it all..."
Avrin soon heard a voice from another woman, seemingly more mature, speak up. "My dear son, the solution is simple, throw it away and try again," a cold yet concise sentence.
"So much for the love of grandparents," Avrin thought to himself.
There was silence from both of his parents until his father spoke a sentence that made Avrin worry.
"You're right! There's no need to feel down, I can just try again! Both of you, go dispose of this thing, I don't want to see it again!" Hearing his father's demand, Avrin's heart grew cold, wondering if he would meet his end again so soon.
"Yes, my lord," both the servants bowed, then with Avrin in the female's arms they exited the room. Avrin, of course, unable to see what they would plan as he fell asleep. Both the servants headed out, a look of nervousness. "What should we do...?" the female spoke, gently patting the baby Avrin's back, a look of reluctance on her face.
"Push this on to someone else. Hmm, I got it!" the male servant with the short beard had a sneer on his face. "Come with me." Soon both left the back of the large estate carefully, obviously such an event needed to be kept under wraps as these two were the most trusted servants in the household.
The man and the female walked some time before reaching a building in the bustling city. It was late at night so other than those who had business to tend to, in such an area it was quiet. The man knocked on a large door with iron frames.
Support the creativity of authors by visiting Royal Road for this novel and more.
"Yeah?" a voice from the other side spoke. The male servant explained he was here to see someone and gave his name.
Handing a token that gave a soft glow through a slot in the door, the door creaked open and both of them entered before being led down a hall. There were crates of goods and people writing on parchment, as if listing and keeping track of things.
Both the man and woman with Avrin in the lady's arms continued down the hall until no one could be seen. They both entered another room that had two guards present, both of which were covered from head to toe in armor that seemed to glow a soft red.
"Welcome, welcome!" They were greeted by a short round man with a missing eye. The room itself was simple, a bed, a carpet, no windows at all and a desk that was piled with sacks of gold and other gems.
The man and woman walked over. "Brother, I have a bit of an issue I need your help with." The male servant soon explained what was going on. After finishing, the short man seemed thoughtful.
"Well... it's no big deal, it's just a baby that needs to disappear, right? I know some buyers that may be interested... hehe." The woman hearing this, jabbed her elbow into the male servant's sides. He winced a bit and gritted his teeth.
"Look, I know what you're planning. You owe me for getting you some contracts. Find an orphanage or family, far from here, not some cultists. If the lord's bloodline is used against him, it will be our heads!"
The man who appeared to be a trade merchant slowly brought his hands together, smiling which exposed a few golden teeth. "Okay, okay, we're blood brothers, right? Disappear, right? Easy, I'll handle it."
Both the male and female felt relief, and some time later, they both left after leaving the baby Avrin in the man's arms. When Avrin woke up again some time later, he let out another quick cry from hunger pain.
"Give him some beast milk, I don't want to hear crying all the way to Bracken city..." an annoyed voice spoke out.
Avrin could feel some bumps and movement, mumbling too. He heard the sound of a woman who cradled him and then stuffed a bottle in his mouth. "Why are we transporting a kid with the goods?" the woman spoke, her attire suggesting she was a guard.
Avrin drank from the bottle as he listened. He understood that currently he was being transported with trade goods in a caravan to God knew where. "Could be worse..." he thought to himself.
This cycle lasted some time. It had been several days from what Avrin could gather when he was awake. They would reach a stop, unload some goods and load some more and travel onwards. Today marked a month since the trade caravan had left from where Avrin had been given to them. It was currently late at night and they had set up camp and were resting as their journey onwards would be continuous for some time. Using dried beast meat, they were preparing meals over the campfires and setting up their tents.
"Hey, did you hear about the battle last week?" The guards were seated beside a campfire, engaging in small talk to pass some time.
"The one about the Outer realm invading?" another guard responded as he sharpened his blade with a whetstone.
"Yeah, fucking bastards are getting brave, I'll give 'em that. The details are insane though. Heard a farmer on the way to sell goods to a city nearby saw a hand reach out and scoop up an entire city and its people like it was nothing. Not even the Aetheric barrier stopped it, shattered like glass." He made motions with his hands as if to make it more exciting.
The nearby guards listening shuddered slightly. "An entire city? That's a lot of people gone just like that, huh... What happened after?" one guard who had been listening asked after speaking.
The main guard telling the story nodded. "Well, don't get worried. Those at the top obviously didn't take kindly to that. Farmer said he saw a flash of light enter where that hand came from, then a roar so loud the farmer's ear bled. Said when he opened his eyes again, the city was back, and that white light carried a giant severed hand."
The guards then laughed proudly with one proclaiming. "Ha! No outer realm bastards are gonna treat us like nothing, that'll teach them. This time a hand, next time a head!" Meanwhile in a tent nearby, a different kind of entertainment was taking place.
A giggle could be heard from the tent Avrin was resting in. "Stop it, the kid's here..." a shy female voice spoke up followed by a man replying. "Who cares, he doesn't cry unless he's hungry anyway. I can't wait any longer either, I'll be quick..." The female complained as the sentence was spoken. "Be quick? Geez, you men are frustrating."
As they eased into it, a guard outside who was keeping watch was gazing around, unaware that he was living his last moments. A swish from the wind parting before an arrow pierced his skull. He tumbled down the roughly set up post, clearly dead.
Those around looked in shock. A rough-looking man glared as he unsheathed his blade. "BANDITS!" roaring out, the camp was then swarmed by bandits with hungry frenzied looks of joy for loot and bloodshed.
The clashing of metal and screams of the dying painted the event in the cycle of such a life. The man and woman were stunned. Before the man could reach for his blade, a male bandit had entered and snickered before quickly plunging his blade into the man's chest. The female screamed while the bandit licked the blood off his blade as he eyed her.
What followed was simply life and death. When the conflict was over, the bandits were quickly taking what they could. Avrin woke up, unaware of what was going on. He cried out as he was hungry. "Huh? What's this?" one of the bandits spoke as he went into the tent and saw Avrin. Reaching over, he took the small wrapped baby and went out with him. "Boss, I found a baby!" he took Avrin to a large man with a beast-like frame who looked at Avrin.
"A brat? Are they that dumb to bring a kid? Pfft..." the bandit leader shook his head in disgust. After all, he may be a bandit leader, but it was survival of the fittest; a baby had no place in a trade caravan.
"Should we kill 'em?" The man holding Avrin spoke, unsure what to do. The bandit leader thought for a moment. "We'll take it all back, find some milk for it. Maybe we can sell it early if we find a buyer."
Later, the bandits had packed up their things as well as most of the goods they could get and began to head back to their base. When Avrin was feeding on some milk he was given, he was listening to their conversations. "Bandits now? Isn't this just great..." A little reluctant, he wondered if that being was looking at this all unfold and if they were amused at Avrin's situation, or maybe this was part of it too.
After several days of travel, the bandits were currently residing in a small fort built against a mountain ridge, hidden from view mostly by large trees. They were celebrating their haul, eating large chunks of cooked meat, and drinking whatever alcohol they could get their hands on.
The bandit leader was laughing, proud of himself. "This makes 46 caravans we hit. With all the loot here, once I find some buyers, we can expand southeast more, or even turn ourselves into a merc army." He clearly had big plans for himself and his so-called brothers in arms.
"Here's to the boss!" one of the rowdy bandits raised a large pitcher of alcohol to the bandit leader. The others did so as well, the leader clearly amused as he raised his own cup, made of gold before taking a swig.
Avrin, of course, was oblivious to it all as he was to the far side of the large chamber with all the other loot they hauled in. Awake and having just been fed, he was listening to the loud cheers and music. Though still a newborn, he was tired. He fell asleep, having a feeling this was just a fleeting moment in his life.
While the bandits were celebrating, they were unaware that figures were closing in on the fort. The scouts they had set up were being cleanly killed and picked off before they could even scream. Then at the fort's entrance, a massive explosion echoed, shaking the fort. Even Avrin had woken up in shock.
What followed were screams and shouts followed by combat. Avrin listened carefully to what was going on. "M-MAGES! THEY GOT MAGES!!" a bandit screamed before he was hit by a fireball, exploding into flames as he screamed before turning to ash.
"Tsch... disgusting vermin..." a woman in a cloak had a wooden stave with a blue gem tipped at its end. Around her, armored figures and others were rushing in to kill the bandits. A young man rushed into the fray. Raising his longsword, the man's body emitted a glow before his sword lit up with runes. With a single cleave, he cut two bandits in half at the waist as if it were a hot knife through butter.
"Try to keep those we can alive, the bounty pays more for live bandits!!" seemingly the leader of the group that had attacked. The bandits were all miserable, clearly unable to defend against these warriors who knew magic and were more skilled than caravan guards.
When it was all said and done, the bandit leader had been beheaded by the leader. All that was left was to secure the fort and alert the nearby city officials a few days' travel away. Avrin heard silence and mumbling, the battle seemingly over. He clearly didn't want to be looked over and starve to death or worse. So he let out a feeble cry to get attention and suss out the situation.
"What's that?" the only female mage of the bunch rushed over to the source, surprise written on her face. "Ohh!! A baby!!" She dropped her staff and reached down to pick up Avrin, joy on her face. "These bastards even steal babies! They all deserve to die!" Hatred in her eyes as she looked over the dead and captive bandits. She gently patted Avrin's back. "There, there..." Avrin, though, sighed in relief. Judging by the sound of things, these people or at least the woman liked him, so he didn't need to worry. He soon fell back asleep, his prior nap having been disrupted due to the fight.
The adventurers cleared up what they could, having to leave the massive load of supplies. From the group of 15, 8 of them remained to keep watch, the rest including Avrin taken by the female, left to head to the city.
"Geez, you know we can't keep a kid..." the man leading the group mumbled as he nervously looked at the woman who was glaring at him. "Why not! It's clearly a sign. Besides, isn't it time we settle down? Look how cute he is!" cooing at Avrin with joy who played along with the happy loving baby, obviously trying to hold onto whoever gave him the most attention.
The man sighed, cursing under his breath, clearly not wanting to argue when he knew regardless, he would lose. When the adventurer group traveled until night, setting up camp near a forest, Avrin was being fed a bottle by the woman who brought some of the beast milk that had been taken by the bandits. She also cleaned up Avrin.
"Let's name him!" the woman suggested excitedly. The man with his arms folded, rolled his eyes, his comrades laughing at the two. "Uhh?" The man's eyes suddenly narrowed as he quickly dashed over with his blade, "GET DOWN!" he roared before slashing, right as a large shadow pounced over towards the woman, from the darkness.
The shadow and the blade of the man clashed, causing sparks to fly. The woman screamed and fell down to the side, while holding Avrin the best she could. "Magic beast...!" the man glared, his body emitting soft hues of blue light, glaring at the creature as they both pushed to try and overwhelm each other. Despite being 3 times smaller than the large wolf beast with its eyes glowing, he was able to hold strong. The man's comrades and even the woman who quickly placed Avrin into the safety of her tent, rushed over to fight. Though smaller wolves sprung out from behind the Magic beast, larger than the average wolf on Earth. The adventurers were still skilled.
Conflict broke out again, shouts and growls as well as roars, explosions from magic. "What's going on?" Avrin mumbled, his feeding interrupted. He heard a growl approaching closer and closer. He could open his eyes, but they weren't too good at focusing despite how hard he tried. He could barely make the outline of a shadow outside the tent before it entered. It was a large wolf that had sniffed him out, or maybe it was the beast milk. The wolf went over, sniffing Avrin a few times before it opened its mouth and grabbed the beast skin tied wrapping around him. Holding Avrin tightly in its mouth it moved out of the tent.
"NO!" the female mage screamed in anger. She wanted to use magic but was afraid of hurting Avrin. She rushed over, but the large magic beast leading the pack got in the way. "Shit!!" the man leading the group roared out as he rushed over, the fighting heating up more. This though bought time for the wolf that had Avrin to flee into the forest as its mouth was holding him. It was bumpy and Avrin could feel the wind from the speed of the wolf rushing through the thick foliage. "Reincarnated only to end up as wolf food, huh?" Avrin reluctantly accepted his fate. He hoped it wouldn't end up like this, even having a feeling that this was just some bad prank being played by the being.
The wolf had been rushing through the forest for what seemed like hours, but right as it entered a clearing, a large boar rushed out and rammed into the wolf's side, causing it to yelp and go flying after dropping Avrin. The wolf growled in pain before it and the boar began to fight. The wolf, due to being larger than average, managed to cut and scrape at the boar, blood spilling on both sides before the wolf had finally lost, due to the exhaustion from the hours of running and ambush of the boar. It reluctantly scampered off and vanished.
The boar grunted in victory before going to Avrin and sniffing a bit, using its tusk to lift the strap of the rope tying the beast skin. It then rushed off into the bushes, rushing for quite some time it stopped to catch its breath. Still wounded and bleeding a bit from its fight.
As the boar lowered its head, the rope strap was let go. It clearly intended to enjoy its meal, which was Avrin. Though as it approached Avrin with its mouth, the wind split before an arrow pierced through its temple, a skilled precise shot.
The boar trembled and in a daze walked a few steps before falling dead. The bushes nearby rustled a little before a middle-aged man moved out from it, a bow in hand with a full quiver, with 3 dead critters hanging from his belt. It was clear he was a hunter. He approached the boar, eyeing it a little.
Avrin was unsure of the situation, though regardless it would be better than starving to death, so he let out a feeble cry. "Hmm?" The man looked in shock at the beast skin wrap, reaching down and turning it, only to see the baby. "A child?!" He looked around a few times, reluctance, sadness, worry, contemplation, then finally he moved his hands around Avrin after putting his bow away.
Pulling Avrin and tying him to his chest, the man reached over and hoisted the boar with seeming ease on his shoulders, a clear indication of his built strength. The man walked some time in the dark before returning to a village, lit up. He avoided being seen and headed straight for a home on the outskirts, with a stone wall around the back.
"I'm home..." he called out as he entered inside. The interior was what one might expect, wooden floors and hand-built, a bit better off than medieval housing. "Welcome home! Oh wow... a boar? This late at night?" a woman in a stitched dress and brown hair appeared, drying her hands with a damp cloth. She looked mature but one could see her face was exhausted and fatigued.
"I told you to please just rest... you shouldn't be up so soon," the man spoke with worry after lowering the boar. He was showing concern for the woman who was his wife. "I'm fine, it keeps my mind off, you know. Hmm, what's that?" The woman looked at the beast skin strapped to the man's chest.
The man looked a little reluctant, but he didn't answer and undid the strap before holding it and showing the baby Avrin to the woman. "I... found it with the boar that was already wounded, which made killing it easier. I think it took this child?"
The woman was stunned. Her body was shaking, almost having to hold her emotions back as she rushed over and took the baby from the man in a snatch. She looked at it carefully. "What a beautiful child..." her voice hushed, her finger tracing Avrin's cheeks.
Avrin, obviously awake, didn't cry. Instead, he just made some random babbling sounds. In his mind, women like it when babies do that, or at least he hoped they did. Hearing Avrin's response, the woman teared up a bit. "W-well... we can keep him here a bit, if anyone comes asking... we..." she was unsure what else to say.
The man who was quiet, gazing at his wife approached her. "I don't think anyone will come... maybe it's a sign... or a gift... from above?" The woman looked tense. Soon the two embraced with Avrin held in the middle. "Losing him days ago before I could even hold him... maybe this is indeed a gift from above," she repeated her husband's words.
With Avrin listening intently, it became clear to him that the woman had given birth a little bit ago, but it had possibly been a miscarriage, and she saw him as this blessing. Maybe for Avrin these two people were a gift too, if it lasted that is, as fate seemed to enjoy playing hot potato with him.
Feeling oddly comfortable, Avrin finally shut his eyes, mentally exhausted from the events of the night, having been unable to sleep. He soon slumbered deeply, hopefully this was the end of passing him along, and the beginning of his new life.