"Hey!" Lem whined, "Easy! Easy now!"

"I told you already, I got this!" Issei shot back, "Look, just jump off and land on that platform over there. Let's rest and then continue."

"Ah, see!? If you really had this, then you wouldn't need rest!"

These two still couldn't properly communicate and cooperate normally, which has led to this slow ascent ending up littered with these bickerings. No matter how many floors they climbed, Lem just could not get used to the anxiety of Issei's invention.

"Sigh, I don't need the rest. My boots do." Issei groaned, "It doesn't take a genius to see I'm not doing any of the heavy lifting, but these propellers are spinning at an RPM so high that it heats the motors up real toasty."

"Where the hell is the power source for those, even?"

"Megavolts would be too much just for these, so I had Lune whip up their younger cousin." Issei pointed the sole of his boot at him to showcase it, "The kilovolt battery! Not bad, eh?"

"Not a clue, but it looks and sounds cool enough to get my stamp of approval." Lem nodded, "I'd still rather we don't use those for the rest of the climb."

"What? Why!?"

"Why? Ignoring the fact they might kill us at any moment if they decided to fail mid-flight, they're just overall slow as shit!" Lem shouted, "It took us this long just to climb up one floor, and there's at least another 100 until we reach the crown!"

"Actually, we scaled 2 floors." Issei chuckled, "And from the looks of it, there's way more than a hundred floors here."

"Then you already know the answer for why we're not using these yourself." Lem crossed his arms, "Take them off, we'll continue on foot. Look, the main issue was the first floor being so confusing. Looking at the pathway in front of us, it's just a straight hike from now on."

"Ugh, fine..."

Thus, the newest piece of technology that hailed from the Vast World had been shelved, or in this case—Backpacked. It appears the Hoverboots are just way too ahead of their time for the people of this universe, but maybe one day there will come a time when their true beauty is fully understood, as is the case with their creator. Nonetheless, the two pressed on until they found what appeared to be an avenue of sorts.

"Tiny cottages and sheds as far as the Eye could see." Issei noted.

"Hm." Lem shrugged.

"What?"

"Oh, nothing. It's just only hitting me now that people would actually willingly live in this piece of crap Tree."

"It looks dope though." Issei added, "Aesthetic as fuck."

"Aesthetic, yes, but there's no practical reason to living like this!" Lem complained, "Look, imagine you wanna visit Boris from ten floors down, are you seriously gonna make the trek there? Or even just the food supply, I imagine that's gotta be annoying as hell to have to transport everywhere."

"Well, I'm sure they had a delivery service going on or something."

"Ha-ha, you're hilarious."

"I see you're only laughing when I'm not telling a joke." Issei got a bit annoyed by this, "Fine then, sarcastic laugh or not, I'll continue to play the straight man to get a smile out of you!"

"Dude, just stop."

"Nuh-uh! I know your weakness now, so I'm gonna start only speaking in facts from now on!" Issei cleared his throat, "The largest mountain in the world is Mount Everest!"

"Can't even get that right, it's Ivrys."

"Ack, no- I meant-! Gah!"

Still undeterred from his newfound pointless goal of trying to lighten the mood of this moody teen, Issei kept the smile on his face as he continued with another factual statement.

"The Water God is actually a Water Goddess, and she's a loli!"

"That's... Wait, is that really true? No, the more important question is what the hell a loli is."

"A female child."

"In... In like the personality sense or like...?"

"No, she literally looks like a child."

"Ah, so she has a babyface."

"No, she's a literal child!" Issei got fussy trying to explain it, "This small! Her hair is the size of her! Big Eyes! She's. A. Child."

"Okay, okay, I get it!" Lem plugged his ears, "I don't know why I'm even humoring you—The chances of that being actually true are like slim to none."

"Here's another fact for you, then: I met all Four Gods!" Issei then extended his fifth finger, "Plus the super secret Sun God, though it was when Lune and I were in Japan."

"I stopped caring a long time ago, dude."

"I don't care, as long as I'm telling the truth, then I'm fulfilling my side of the promise." Issei returned a sly wink, "Speaking of, I think you'll for sure know this one—Nelly is in love with Meil~!"

"She is NOT." Lem stomped his foot hard on the ground, "...Look, fuck you, dude."

"Woah, sorry. Didn't think I'd hit a sore spot with that." Issei felt bad for only making things worse, "Oof, I really messed up, geez."

"You really did."

"Yeah, my bad. I totally forgot people don't like having to listen to cold hard facts."

"Kneel." Lem's Eyes glew a strong Yellow, "Say that again, though this time I'm not ordering you to."

"Khk! Damn, that's one scary Iro Ability!" Issei smirked, "See? You look so confident right now! Heh, if only you could apply that attitude with Nel-"

"Lift your chin." Lem Ordered once more.

"Huh? Unf-!"

Upon positioning his chin in the perfect spot for receiving an uppercut, Issei was sent flying to the shabby houses behind him. The backpack serving as a lesser cushioning had saved him from sustaining any major injuries, but just the mere fact he flew off so far even with all that extra weight had proven to Issei just how scary of an opponent Lem is.

"Stand, we're not done here." Lem cracked his knuckles, "Think you're hot shit, huh? Prove it, unless of course—You're too scared and weak to do so."

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"Like I said, people really hate facing the facts...!" Issei smiled.

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"Hey, why you gotta fight all of a sudden? Are those hormones acting up or something?" Issei jeered.

"Joke all you want, you're deadmeat unless you fall to the ground and apologize." Lem kept the pace and approached him, "Though I'd rather beat you to a bloody pulp first before you do that."

"Y'know, our number one healer Lune's not with us right now." Issei chuckled, "If you get a scrape, you'll have to tough it out until we find him."

"Worry about yourself." Lem's gait transformed into a running assault, "Cause no one gets away with calling me a coward!"

One, two! Lem's punches kept escalating in speed to a point where Issei just couldn't keep up. After all, his heavy duty backpack kept him pretty sluggish, which led to him sustaining a ton of hits.

"Come on, fight back!" Lem considered Ordering him.

"Crap, guess we're really doing this..." Issei spat out some blood before showing off his bloody grin, "Now, what to use, what to use..."

"Rummaging through your backpack in the middle of a fight?" Lem ran to finish the job, "Sorry, but that flashlight won't help you much! ...Huh!?"

In but one clean motion, Issei had successfully taken his weapon of choice out of the backpack, slammed it into Lem's face, and gotten up to fight again, this time leaving his backpack behind as he went to chase him. The item of choice, you ask?

"A fucking skillet!?" Lem check if all his teeth were in place with his tongue, "Are you out of your mind!?"

"I call it the Low Iron." Issei flourished it in his hands, "It may look like just a regular skillet, but this one has a pretty interesting passive effect."

"Passive effect? Ooough..."

The hit he received made his vision blurry, and Lem was now battling just to stay conscious. For Issei, it was child's play to run full speed and slam the Low Iron into him once more, sending him hurling towards one of the sheds. Lem was still conscious in spite of this, somehow, but he couldn't move a muscle. His vision was now akin to TV static, almost like when you have...

"Low Iron...!" Lem laughed at the pun in the name.

"Heh, finally gotcha to laugh, did I?" Issei then dropped to the ground as well, "Ack! Shit, no!"

"Eh? What the hell is wrong with you?"

"I-It kinda has a small chance for the effect to hit me as well..." Issei struggled to talk.

"In other words, you're the one with the low iron." Lem finally propped himself back up to his feet, "Argh, that was actually kinda cool. I'll admit it made me laugh, but your goal of trying to be funny is gonna be the reason your life ends today."

Pushed back into a corner just like when this fight started, Issei had to think quick if he wanted to get out of this alive and even try to turn the tides in his favor. Lem looked like he had a genuine bloodlust, and now that the situation was such that he could move and Issei couldn't, there was but only one thing to do.

"Okay! I'm sorry, I yield!" Issei mustered up all his strength to plead for his life, "You won, so let's stop this."

"...Pussy."

"Namecalling won't work on me, kid. I'm an adult." Issei chuckled before getting his face kicked into the ground.

"Shoulda' kept quiet, then."

If you asked Issei, he'd probably say this situation was pretty bad, and rightfully so. He was a mere point five seconds away from getting his skull smashed in by this angsty teen, so to combat this, he employed one more ace up his sleeve.

"Take this!"

"Ack, what the fu-!? The hell was that, man!?"

"You're a bandit, right? How come you've never heard of pocket sand?" Issei triumphantly got up.

"My Eyessss!" Lem kept writhing in pain on the ground, "This isn't sand! This hurts way more than sand!"

"Oh yeah, maybe cause it's powdered pepper."

"Gyahhhh!"

And thus, Issei emerged as the victorious one in this battle of the ages. Verily, the war was hard fought, but he pulled through with courage, perseverance... and some disgustingly dirty tricks. Eh, as long as it kept his head on his shoulders, he certainly wasn't gonna complain.

"Got it all out of your system now?" Issei tossed him a water bottle from his backpack, "Here, wash it off with this."

"Ugh, muuu... AAAAAHHH!" He screamed even louder this time.

"Oh wait, did I maybe give you the salty ocean water?"

"WHY DID YOU BRING THAT WITH YOU!?" Lem cried out, "Agh, the pain~!"

"Well excuse me for using up all our drinkable water!" Issei crossed his arms with a pout, "I was thirsty, so this was the next best thing."

After a lot more agonizing pain having to be endured on Lem's side until he finally got all the gunk off his Eyes, they finally decided to press on. Well, kind of.

"Hey, slow down! I still can't open my Eyes fully!" Lem noted as he bonked on a wall, "Oof!"

"Here, gimme paw. I'll guide you." Issei kindly offered his help.

"Hell no! I'm not about to hold hands with a guy-BWAHH!?"

Exactly as he said this, Lem fell through a crack in the floor that formed in between the roots. Had he been on his own, he most certainly would've fallen back to the first floor of the Tree, though had he been alone, there's also the fact he'd still have full functionality of his Eyes.

"Hup." Issei caught him and kept holding him under the arm, "Alright, get a move on, shortstack."

"Ngh! Let... me... go!"

"I hope to God I don't have a son one day..." Issei commented, "Babysitting is way more difficult than I first thought."

"Who're you calling a baby!?"