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Vol.16 Ch.341 - We Dem Bois

"So, uhhh... Bamb?" Adam asked with raised eyebrows, "Edward said you can understand us?"

"Yes, I have known your language since I was a fawn." She replied, albeit in her mind.

"She said she learned the language in her youth." I vocalized her thoughts for her.

"Incredible, just by listening to the people around her and taking an interest in humans, she memorized a pretty large vocabulary just like that." Adam commended her, "Well done, young doe."

At this appraisal, Bamb got so ecstatic that she actually got the zoomies. Excitedly prancing around all over the place before running circles around him as if to try her best to hug Adam without hugging him. This was in turn rewarded with Adam gently patting her on the head before hugging her by the neck. What the hell is this, some kind of fairy tale? The gap between a frail doe and a huge muscle maniac like Adam is just too strong, but it works because he's a handsome prince, I guess. Damn, this guy's charisma seems to even extend itself to the animal kingdom...

"And to think, all that talent and hard-work would have gone by completely unnoticed had she never stumbled across someone who could understand animals like Ed." Issei gave me some credit as well, "Call it fate that we met you, Bamb. Yoroshiku."

"Y-Yoroshi...?" Bamb got disheartened once she heard a word she didn't understand.

"Don't mind him, he sometimes mentions words even we don't know." I chuckled, "But well, this is actually pretty awesome. Now that we don't have to worry about translating to and from her native language, we can get our info way easier."

"Can I help you with anything?" She tilted her head at me.

"Yeah, could you tell us about the recent attacks on the locals here?" I inquired.

"That..." She immediately started feeling bad, "It was the wolves, surely. I am sorry for what they did, but please do not blame my kind."

"What'd she say?" Adam asked.

"The wolves were the ones who had apparently attacked the locals." I parroted her testimony, "The deers had nothing to do with it."

"Well, that checks out with the reports..." Adam thought, "Please continue."

"Can you tell us why the wolves did it?" I continued the questioning.

"T-The wolves..." The words coming out of her mind quivered a bit, "A large man told them to."

"A large man?" I raised an eyebrow.

"What? What?" Issei eagerly waited for me to give them the entire translation, "What large man?"

"Dude, I'm not gonna repeat everything she says the moment she says it." I got kind of sick of it, "Can you just let me finish speaking to her and THEN I'll tell you two everything?"

"Yeah, but...!" Issei wanted to say something, but Adam stopped him.

"Indeed, we shouldn't drag this out too long." Adam put his hand on Issei's shoulder, "We're in a forest, after all. I'd like to wrap this up before any dangerous beasts find us."

"Mn... Fair point..." Issei gave up before turning to me, "Take it away, then."

"Thanks." I then focused my all on the conversation with Bamb, "Can you describe this man? What did he say to the wolves to convince them to attack the locals?"

"The wolves... Sorry, my kind are not on good terms with them." She apologized for being squeamish on the topic, "Still, you are the first person who understands me, so I will do my best to tell you. The man was tall, yet intimidating. He simply told the animals to look for someone, and that was all the convincing they needed."

"Wait, animals? As in, not just the wolves?" I noticed her tiny fumble.

"A-Ahm, I-I mean...!" She tried to fix the mistake, "W-Well, obviously it wasn't just the wolves, but..."

"Hm, let's put that aside for now." I chose to just continue the conversation, "Well, we already knew they were chasing after someone, but we didn't know that there was another man using you as his hitmen. I guess I should apologize this time on behalf of the humans."

"Human..." Bamb looked lost in thought, "Edward, how did you learn our language? How can you hear me?"

"Like I said, I can read minds." I smiled back at her, "As for how I learned Animal Tongue, well... I once tried reading the mind of an animal, and realized they had cognitive thoughts, just like us. I wrote down the words I could discern, regularly checking its contents as a sort of crutch when conversing with them, and over time I realized I could talk with them even without it."

"That is very nice of you." Flowers appeared next to her words, "You are a kind person, Edward, just like him..."

"Him?" I asked.

"Yes, the boy who took care of me before." She nodded, "He couldn't hear me, but he was very nice to the other animals and I. His home also kept out the predators from attacking us. It was a nice life."

So she lived in a farm? Petting zoo? In any case, she appears to be a domestic animal that left her home. This would explain her affinity towards humans, since the caretakers usually are very kind and generous to their animals. I wonder, who was that boy...?

"Not all humans are like that boy." I decided to be truthful, "I was blessed with the ability to understand the animals around me, but I'm sure I wouldn't treat you as kindly had I not been born with it. This goes for the other humans as well, a natural barrier dividing us."

"Indeed, it is a sad world..." She looked down before perking back up, "But one that can be fixed with knowledge! For my entire life, I thought I would never be able to speak with a human like I am now, due to my inability to speak. I tried all sorts of ways, from using my mouth to write on paper, to using my hooves to write on the dirt and sand around me, but well, my hoofwriting isn't really the most legible..."

Huh, she's so... girly. Being self-conscious about something as trivial as her hand-well, hoofwriting is definitely unexpected. I guess this aspect is present in all girls, no matter what they are. Or maybe, did she pick this timidity up from another caretaker? It isn't entirely off the table yet, so I should probably... No wait, what the hell am I doing? I should be asking more about the animal rampage, not this!

This tale has been unlawfully lifted without the author's consent. Report any appearances on Amazon.

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"Sorry to do this to you, but could we please stick to the topic?" I sighed, "We're investigating the recent animal attacks and would like to know as much as we can about that first. B-But once we're done, I would really like to talk more with you about your story!"

"Haha, of course." She bowed her head as if obliging, "The lanky man said..."

"Ed." Issei kind of speedwalked over to us before timidly asking, "You done yet?"

"Not yet, wait a second, geez..." I furrowed my brows.

"Alright, hurry it up." He then awkwardly left in the direction he came from.

"Right, where were we?" I turned back to an anxious Bamb, "Hm? Did he surprise you? Sorry about that."

"N-No, something isn't right..." She quivered in place, "I feel uneasy. A gut feeling."

"A gut feeling?" I started to worry she might run away in the opposite direction at any moment.

A moment later we could hear the bushes rustling, and once again Issei returned to ask us if we were finished with the interrogation.

"You done now?" He looked a bit spooked, "It's kinda urgent."

"God, what the hell is so urgent that you had to return so quickly?" I groaned.

"Well, Adam's fending off a giant wolf just around the corner and..."

"Dude, what the hell!?" I jolted before running to where we left Adam, "Tell me that sooner, jackass!"

What the hell, why did you keep this detail from me!?"

"Well, you two looked like you were having fun, and..." Issei shrugged as he ran behind with Bamb following shortly behind.

"W-Why are you running towards the danger, Edward!?" Bamb's thoughts obstructed my vision.

"Well I can't just leave my friend to die now, can I?" I shouted back, "He's an important figure for the people here, but I'm worried not even all that armor will be enough... to...?"

Turning the corner to see what was going on, all three of us were left awestruck once we saw a sweaty Adam, clad in nothing but his boxer briefs and tank top, bench-pressing the dead carcass of one of the stray wolves that had apparently attacked him. The other wolves were equally as dead, scattered all over the place like he was practicing throwing medicine balls or something.

"Thirty-three, thirty...four...! Gah!" He tossed the poor beast aside, "Fuck, even without this armor weighing me down, I still can't even get to fifty. I should have never agreed to go on that diet with Elaine..."

"Uhh, Adam?" We asked with worry and fear showing itself fully on our faces, "What the hell is this?"

"Oh hi, Edward." He waved back, "These beasts thought to pounce on us, so I told Issei to run away while I tested my training a bit."

"Wait, didn't you tell me to go get Edward so we can all fight them off together?" Issei asked.

"Sorry, but I just can't go all-out when I need to worry about protecting you at the same time." He bashfully scratched his cheek, "I thought to kill two birds with one stone by sending you off and dealing with these by myself, ha-ha..."

"T-These holes in their chests..." I shivered as I inspected the giant gaping holes, "No sword could do that."

"Oh, you noticed?" He thought to quip even, "Your years of training under Harper paid off well, I see. Indeed, I wanted to see if I could rip their heart out with my hand, since in my head it looked cool, but the truth is it just makes your hands bloody. Still, it was an effective way to lower their numbers, so I stuck to it until the end."

"I see you showing us your hand like you expect us to high five you." I inched away steadily, "Wash your hands first."

"Oh, come on! You're a doctor, right?! Aren't bloody hands a staple of your job or something!?" He tried getting closer to us, but we didn't let him.

"That only goes for surgeons, I'm still just a health advisor." I corrected him as Issei helped pour water over Adam's hands to wash them off, "I knew royalty was always known for being out of touch with the rest of society, but hearing this from you? I'm hurt."

"Alright, alright. I washed my hands, so now can we celebrate?" He proudly raised his hand just barely high enough for Issei to have to jump to reach it, "For The Boys?"

"Yeah, fine..." I sighed with a smirk before raising my hand as well, "For The Boys..."

"Hell yeah, We Dem Bois!" Issei jumped with all his might to reach us as we all laughed together, "So, now that that's settled, why don't we set up camp here while Ed tells us everything him and Bamb talked about?"

"Sure, I don't mind." I chuckled, "We got enough food from these guys to have ourselves a feast, even with the four of us. Ain't that right, Bamb?"

"W-Wolves...!" Bamb looked queasy as she tried her best to avoid the blood splatter on the grass, "D-Dead wolves... What if one is alive...?!"

She's a doe, so it'd make sense for her to feel scared. Well, it'd probably be best to calm her down with some food so she can continue giving us helpful information on the case, but will she want to eat stray wolf meat? Can deers eat wolves? I've certainly never seen it, but it might've probably happened once or twice. Well, first time for everything, I guess.

"Bamb, stray wolf meat is actually really juicy and delicious when cooked." I patted her on the head, "Of course, I'm not gonna force you or anything, but I would be delighted to have you join us."

"E-Edward..." She gulped, "I trust you."

"What'd she say?" Issei asked, way more calmly this time.

"Adam." I turned to the burly guy setting up the campfire.

"Yeah?" He glanced back.

"Chop the meat up into tinier bits." I smiled, "Bamb wants some too!"

"As you wish!" He turned back around, eager to whip up the best and tastiest meat in the world, "To The Boys, and the lovely doe that is accompanying us!"

"Woo!"