Well, here we are. The final day of our one year internship at Havana. It’s been a blast, but it’s time to go. That being said, the day hasn’t really been as smooth sailing as I had at first thought it to be. Namely, from the moment we woke up, we had to say our goodbyes to all the individual quikkas of both Havana and Provincia, who came to visit us and thank us once again for all that we’ve done for them. Currently, they’re holding a grand feast in the central part of the quik, not unlike the one they threw back when the two quiks became friends. Me on the other hand, I have my hands full with something much more difficult…
“Brother, no, Schnell.” Cassandra looked me in the Eyes, her face teeming with emotion as she braced herself, “I love you. Not as a friend, not as family, or however else you may see it. I love you as a man.”
“…Uh-huh.”
What the hell do I say to that!? That was a textbook confession, right?! I can’t just brush her off after she went through all the trouble of setting up the perfect stage! Hell, she even had just the two of us go somewhere away from the bustling crowd so she could hear my answer without any interruptions. If I ever wanted to confess to someone, I couldn’t have done it any better myself! But the issue still persists, I can’t accept her feelings.
“I’m sorry.” I tried looking away, only to get shouted at in return.
“No!” Her Eyes got all teary, “You look me in the face and give me a clear answer! I won’t accept a half-hearted response.”
Ugh, why must she make things even more difficult? I already told you I’m not interested, girl, so please just leave it at that and don’t make things any more embarrassing than they already are! I can’t, okay? Just looking at her, I feel like my throat will clog up, and I won’t be able to voice my honest thoughts on this at all. I want to see her happy, but I just can’t accept her feelings. That’s because if I do, I’ll either have to stay here or take her with us, and I honestly don’t know which option is worse!
“I’m selfish.” I gulped before making direct Eye contact, stuttering as I spoke from the anxiety, “The only dreams and ideals I care about are my own, those being to travel the World. Goddammit, you’ve known this from the start.”
“So what?” She grabbed hold of my hands, “Then just take me with you, then everything will be fine, right?”
“I… The guys will…! And Tanathos…!”
“You know full well they won’t mind!” She raised my hands to her heart, “And my father, I’m sure he’ll understand as well! The point is, I don’t want to have to say goodbye to you! You’ve helped us get back on our feet, grow to impossible heights, and throughout all that, you still decided to take some of your precious time to help teach me all sorts of things I didn’t know before! I value that, and I value you, Schnell, so why?!”
Shit. Shit, fuck, argh! I can’t take you, I just can’t! The places we’ll be visiting, who knows what kind of trouble we’ll run into, and I don’t want to have to see you get hurt! Fuck, don’t do this to me! I want to take you with us, I really do! If you’d have told me sooner, I would have accepted your feelings without any and all issues! Oh, but that’s not right, is it? Because even if we were together a week, a month or even a whole year ago, I’d still have to leave, and you’d still have to stay…
“I don’t like you.” I settled for a very bad solution to this problem, “No matter how many times you tell me this, I cannot accept your feelings.”
“Huh?” She suddenly let go of my hands, her body shaking from the shock, “W-What?”
“Get it through your thick skull, idiot!” I started shouting at her, “I don’t like you like that! I never did! You’re just some girl we met on our travels is all! I’ll meet countless others, just like I did you! You mean nothing to me!”
“I-Is that so?” She started chuckling in a self-deprecating tone, “Then why is it? Why is it that you can’t look me in the Eyes when you say such things? You know, when you don’t look people in the Eyes, it gives me the impression that you’re not being honest.”
“…Goodbye, Cassandra.” I turned to head back to the others, not even giving her the closure of looking her in the Eyes, “Tomorrow, the three of us will depart, and you will stay here. End of discussion.”
Soon after I had rejoined these two, who were happily drinking all of Tanathos’ rum reserves without reserve, so to speak, I had sat down next to them before heaving a heavy sigh. They immediately caught on to what had happened from context clues, and had poured me a cup without even asking or saying anything, instead waiting for me to at least finish my first of many cups before they started grilling me about the details.
You could be reading stolen content. Head to the original site for the genuine story.
“So, I take it things didn’t go the way she had envisioned it?” Shaid looked at the bottom of his cup.
“She even made sure to set everything up, the poor girl…” Olya clicked his tongue, “Didn’t take you to be the heartbreaker type, bud.”
“I’m not.” I rolled my Eyes, “I just… She sees something in me that I just don’t. If I took her with us, I’m sure things would turn out okay, but whenever she’s around me, I just get this feeling, like I just need to protect her at all costs. I’m afraid that there will come a time when I won’t be able to keep her out of harm’s way.”
“That’s awfully selfless of you.” Shaid took another swig of his cup after a refill, “Too bad she won’t ever know about why exactly you rejected her. Heh, knowing you, you probably blurted something horrible out just to get her off your case.”
“Ungh…” I hid my face on the table’s surface out of shame, “Dammit…”
“Wait, you did!?” Olya jolted, “You idiot! Even I’m not that stupid when it comes to a lady’s feelings!”
Damn you two, thinking you’re some kind of geniuses when it comes to a woman’s heart, but neither of you would know how much this hurts! Ugh, worst part is that I can’t even be mad at them, since they’re completely right. I was the one who fucked up, but there’s just no other way to go about this. I’ll have to suffer alone, that’s gonna be my atonement…
***
The morning after, we woke up early to get dressed and depart for the western dock before the Sun got too hot. Tanathos had prepared us some breakfast, but Cassandra was nowhere to be found. Tanathos noticed me looking around the room for her, before telling me in a quiet voice that she went to tend to the fields. Guess that makes sense, it’s her happy place after all.
“You three better get going.” He said as we finished up our plates, “If she comes back, things might get complicated.”
Ah, he just looked at me for a second. Guess he knows I rejected his daughter last night. How though, I couldn’t tell you. Maybe she told him through tears about how much of a heartless monster I am for beating the World record for the most fucked up rejection ever, or maybe he just found out after seeing how sad and awkward everyone was acting. In the end, though, the only thing I can think of when I see the Old Man’s face is the thing he told me after I had talked to him in the greenhouse – I just think it’d be wonderful is all…
“R-Right.” I picked up our luggage as we started leaving the house one by one, “Guess this is goodbye then, house. We’ve been here since your birth, and I hope that we at least don’t get to live through your death.”
“Just what in the World are you spouting?” Tanathos furrowed his brows worriedly, “Ouroboras forbid any of you get outlived by a measly sandstone house. If it would save you three from the cold grasp of death, I’d tear the entire quik down!”
“Ha-ha, please don’t…” We chuckled uncomfortably, “It took us so long to finally make it just like we wanted it, so tearing it down is a bit…”
Looking at each other after our little exchange, all four of us suddenly burst out into a loud laughter. This laughter then devolved into tears, one by one, trickling down our faces as we went to hug each other one last time. It was a touching moment, and I’m sure it would have only been better if Cassandra was present, but I guess I have no one else to blame but myself.
“Goodbye brothers, may luck be with you.” Tanathos waved us off as we started walking to the dock on foot, “I’m sorry we couldn’t provide you any camels!”
Ah, now that he mentions it, thanks to dad, both Lina and Linda are now not under Havana’s possession. Tanathos did mention he ordered a couple of camels from the Provincians, but it’s just not the same without those two. For Linda, I can imagine she’s free to roam the World on her own, as long as she didn’t get caught and killed by anyone in the dock city, but as for Lina, dad’s probably already cooked her into a fine dish. Rest in peace.
“Phew, there’s the ship.” Shaid pointed it out in the distance, “Fuck your dad, amigo. For real, he made this trek so much more difficult.”
“Yeah, what he said.” Olya spoke in between heavy breaths, “If I see him again, you best believe I’ll draw him as ugly as possible in my Traveler’s Notes. Straight up!”
“Hah, yeah. He’s a real ass when he gets pissy like this, but there’s not much we can do.” I shrugged, “More importantly, where are we going to next?”
As if suddenly realizing they didn’t plan our next route ahead at all, they looked at each other before facepalming at their own lack of preparation. Spitballing one idea after another, we had realized all too soon that we were missing one specific and highly important piece of the puzzle.
“We need money if we are to travel anywhere further than where we’ve already went.” I said as we climbed aboard the ship, “So what, we gonna try and scam our way into another one year internship or something?”
“Nah, no more of that.” Shaid waved his hand, “Rather, I’d like it if we could finally continue our journey again. Remember, unifying the World takes top priority.”
“Yeah, but we can’t do something as grand as that without money, right?” Olya removed the anchors tying the ship to the dock, “We need another way to earn ourselves the money.”
Just then, a thought occurred to me. One that was so outlandish, and kind of funny too, that it just might work. You see, in the novel Olya’s writing, he mentions the main characters traveling to Carmen to ask the King for additional travel funds. It was so hilarious, seeing them just waltzing into the King’s abode, demanding him money in exchange for the secret to making the perfect greenhouse for wheat, and getting a fortune just like that. Back when I first read it, Olya told me it was just meant as a cheap way to advance the storyline, but it’s not like we should brush the idea off just yet.
“We’re going to Carmen!” I announced all of a sudden.
“Fueh?!” They turned to me as the sails raised, “Carmen!?”
“That’s right! I have an important meeting with the King!”