"Anna, we're glad you're alright." Mom and dad sighed in relief.
"Yeah, I'm fine too, thanks for asking." I muttered under my breath, "We got into some trouble, but we made it out somehow, so for now let's just sit down and get everyone up to speed."
Looking at me with a bit of a difficult expression, my parents did feel kind of guilty for completely skipping over me when expressing their joy that we're safe. Analyzing their minds, I knew not to get mad, since it was obvious that they only meant that because they trusted I could handle myself. But if that's the case, then they sure as hell could've worded it better. The Gryses, Issei and Othelia were busy talking about Allen, so they didn't really hear my little selfish retort, however Eleanor did.
"Don't mind them." She whispered when no one was looking at us as we made our way to the dining room, "I understand being happy that Annie's safe, but just skipping you out of it was way too cruel. I hope you can look past it."
"It's alright." I muttered back quietly, "They've never been good with expressing what they really wanna say, so I'm not mad or anything. More importantly, how did things go with you guys in the mansion?"
"Ugh, it was hell..." She groaned, "The queen and prince tried calming everybody down by inviting us to eat dinner with them, but it seems they were the ones most scared. After that, it was just a whole slew of trouble. As you heard earlier, Issei lost his utensils, so the queen in her anxiety rushed every maid for a new set. They ended up bringing him an entire mountain of cutlery, which Cene almost instinctively pushed off the table."
"That does sound rough." I thought she was done with the story, however I seem to have been sorely mistaken.
"That's not all." She continued, "After that, Cecily rushed to pick them up, all the while scolding him, but the queen went to stop her since it's apparently bad manners to pick something off the floor whilst seated at the dining table. They both somehow started wrestling on the floor, both too stubborn and anxious to realize how much they were embarrassing themselves, and just when everyone thought things couldn't get any worse, dad made a dirty joke."
Oooooooooh no. Oh God, anything but one of dad's jokes...! That guy, he's so out of touch with reality that his jokes just turn out super offensive! Just what the hell did he say, or rather, do I even ask? I'm scared to ask, he probably tarnished the Saint family name with it! God, any God, but preferably one of the nicer ones, PLEASE tell me the joke he made about the queen of this continent wrestling for a fork on the ground wasn't that offensive...!
"Of course, I'm not gonna repeat it." She glanced over at the queen and Cecily as they talked in front of us, briefly shriveling up just from the recollection of that fateful moment, "But all I'm gonna say is that it instantly made everyone in the room lose their appetite. Even Cene, who doesn't yet understand the concept of dirty jokes, had a visibly irked expression on his face once he heard dad say what he said."
"Can I at least know the topic of the joke?" I asked, outright refusing to read her mind and see for myself.
"I'll just say it has to do with cheating and lesbians." She actually shivered from the embarrassment.
"...I can assume the rest of it..." I put my hand on her shoulder as a single compassionate tear rolled down my cheek.
In any case, we sat down to finish the dinner they had apparently started but never quite properly finished, and with the help of four more hungry hungry hippies, the feast was done and over with in a flash. With this, everyone was now caught up with the story of how we bested the evil lanky man Selzion, as well as the animals that were rebelling against the humans of Cardina. I'll admit, I tried to omit some parts which I wasn't proud of, especially the dream sequence, but Adam really made for an enthralling storyteller. By the end of his version of the tale in full, even I found myself sitting on the edge of my seat, wondering what happened next. Hold on, did we even go to the same place!? How is his version of the story so much cooler!
"It was a fearsome battle, but we eventually prevailed." He finished it off with a bang, "Though, apart from Edward almost up and dying on us, I would even consider the entire fight to be pretty fun, all things considered."
"Geez, you almost died?" Issei was oddly enough the one to apologize, "Sorry, I definitely should have been there with you."
"Come on now, you'd probably have put us in a way more dangerous situation." I joked.
"Oi, next time you go somewhere, I'll definitely go with just to spite you!" He waved his fist around as everyone laughed.
"But seriously, it's good everything got settled." Othelia smiled honestly, "Now we can all go back to the way things were before."
"Yes, I am glad you made it out safe, Edward." Bamb snuggled up to me by the table, "Had the animals harmed you beyond saving, I would have never forgiven them."
"Naww, don't worry about it, Bamb!" Anna reached over to scratch her head, "But guys, you do realize we still aren't done, right?"
"Indeed, I made a promise to see things through until the end with Bamb, and that is exactly what I intend on doing." Adam proclaimed, "Bamb, fret not, for we will be departing for Montes as soon as possible."
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"This goes without saying, but I'm coming with." I smiled at her as well.
"Oi, remember what I said." Issei gave me a one armed bro hug over the shoulder, "I'm coming with as long as I get to annoy you!"
"Gee, how thoughtful." Cecily giggled, "But hey, that's in Montes, right? It's been a while, but I should really visit Marina's parents. Ever since Lune died, they've been like my very own, so I really ought to come by with Cene."
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"Anyone else?" I turned to the rest of the people in the room, "Anna, you coming with?"
"No, I think I'll stay here this time." She bashfully giggled, scratching her cheek a bit as she said, "Really, it seems the only purpose I serve when out and about with you is causing you to worry about me and put you in dangerous situations. I think I'm better off here for now."
"Don't say that." Othelia consoled her, "Unless Edward himself said so, you don't have to see yourself as deadweight, and I highly doubt he'd ever think of you as such."
"Yeah, just think about it." Issei said something rather careless, "We brought Eleanor to Mount Ivrys and everything turned out completely fine, despite her not doing jack-"
"What the fuck do you mean by that, asshole!?" She slapped him straight across the face, turning him into a DIY tornado in the middle of the mansion, "You tryna' start something here, huh? You ass!"
"Eleanor! What kind of behavior are you showing to everyone!?" Mom immediately went to reprimand her, "A lady doesn't just go around slapping people. Apologize to him this instant!"
"He started it!" She whined as if she was Allen's age.
"You alright?" Othelia rather coldly inspected Issei's Red cheek before siding with sis immediately after, "You deserved that one, y'know?"
"Owowow...! Sigh, yeah..." Issei feigned being in great pain as he admitted to going out of line with that comment, "My bad, I just wanted Anna to feel better about herself. Didn't think before I spoke, so sorry about that."
"See, sis?" I calmly added, "He apologized fair and square, so don't you have anything to say?"
"He still called me deadweight, so best I can do is not tell him to go jump off a bridge." She glared over at Issei, "Although I really want to."
"Eleanor, if you continue to say stuff like that..." Dad, with his impeccable timing and absolutely splendid choice of words advised, "Well, I'm afraid you won't ever find yourself a partner at this rate."
"Hm?" She turned to him all flabbergasted, the looming smile on her face more confused at the sudden change of topic than mad, "Who said anything about a partner, you damned old man!?"
"Just what are you calling your father who is so desperately trying to give you advice, young lady!" Dad got furious, "Dammit, before you went with your brother to that damned mountain, you never would have called me such an awful name! I'm just saying, you're already 24, and your lousy brother sure isn't rushing to show me my grandkids!"
"Ignoring the fact that I'm 25 and you got your own daughter's age wrong..." She sighed, "What's that got to do with the current situation!?"
"Oi sonny." Dad turned to Issei, "Yeah, talking to you, slanted Eyes. You mentioned before that that White haired lady friend of yours is merely a travel companion, right?"
"I-I..." Issei kind of offhandedly glanced at an expectant Othelia before gulping, "Well, we're not dating, so I guess that's true. Why?"
"Great, in that case..." Dad suddenly put the spotlight on his daughter dearest, "Don't you think my daughter's just the perfect lass for y-!"
"Shut it, you damned geezer!" Both sis and I clobbered him on the head, "That's not how matchmaking works, jackass!"
"To be fair, this is how your grandfather introduced your father to me..." Mom added, although with a hint of bashfulness sprinkled in.
"He's taken!" Eleanor yelled, embarrassed beyond belief to be put on the spot like that, "Wait no, that's not the main point! I'm not interested!"
"I'm all for a lady being handed to me on a silver platter, but I think I'll hold off on the offer as well." Issei chuckled, trying his best to keep the tension in the room low, "Besides, Othelia would..."
"Hm?" Othelia was now phasing out of existence from the shock of dad's announcement, "Huh?"
"Othelia! Calm down, I declined the offer! Oi, Othelia!!!" Issei violently shook her up, "Geez, do I really strike you as someone so sleazy to accept such an offer?"
"Yes." Othelia gave an immediate response.
"Yeah, actually." I too replied within milliseconds, "I got genuinely scared for a second when dad suggested it, seeing as it IS you we're talking about."
"Not to be rude to The Boy, but..." Adam chuckled, "If anyone would do it, it'd be you."
"You're a total creep, after all." Eleanor sighed, "The type to say something as horrible as wanting flowers in both hands and gladly accept the offer despite having Othelia."
"Huh?" Dad worriedly whispered to my disappointed mom, "Didn't the boy just say he was single though?"
"Sigh, you're so tactless when it comes to these things, dear..." Mom could only keep him from making things worse at this point.
"Uhh..." Issei recalled saying something similar in the past, "N-No way! I'd never say that, Othelia's the only...!"
"Hm?" Othelia's ears perked up, "You stopped talking? Something wrong?"
"Shit, that's right! The perfect counter to stop this whole pointless argument!" Issei declared in front of everyone, "I'm going back to my own world soon, so why would I think about dating or marriage and all that crap? Haha, can't get too invested if I'm just gonna up and leave soon, right?"
"A-Ah, yeah..." Eleanor looked kind of taken aback, realizing he just said all that in front of Othelia.
"Ah, is that how it is." Dad shrugged as if he had no skin in the game whatsoever, "Well, too bad then. Come on everyone, let's go back home and rest."
"O-Othelia..." Cecily inched closer to console the quiet girl, only for her to run off on her own, presumably in the direction of the house, "Othelia, wait!"
"Damn." Aru finally said something for the first time in a while, "You really screwed up, didn't you, foreigner?"
"A-Ah..." Issei stood on, realizing how much he hurt her with this one revelation, "Crap..."