I open the window in my office to let the fresh air in since working for a long period of time stresses me out.
The cool, gentle breeze brushes off in my face and it continues to circulate thoroughly out the office. The files that were stacked together and being held down by a paperweight gently flutter. The curtains flail each time the air pushes inside the room in a boom.
I step out in the veranda of my office to stare at the scenery of my land. Sunlight gently rays down my pale skin as it gives a radiant shine.
I can see the people of the capital from the view here. Not only humans but other races such as beast kin, demon kin, elves, dwarves, dragonkin and other variations from those main races.
They go here and there, going about their own businesses. The streets are filled with stalls containing various goods and merchandises. Carriages come and go to some places to either deliver something or to transport people or things.
Everyone is smiling. Everyone is in a joyous mood as their life is easily livable.
This is my five years of effort working and giving my best to make this land prosper.
I work non-stop for the sake of people to establish equality among the people of this world and to establish peace to each and every nation.
This is all for the sake of that promise I made to that man when I was five years old.
For the power he will pass down to me, I shall carry his name and his will.
The power that I currently possess and the will I currently carry is my drive for this peace this nation is experiencing.
And I am going to protect this against all odds without hesitation.
With the pride of the name, he passed down to me.
Astlan.
I am Ashfon Astlan Lionheart.
But…
Even though I am performing my job as an excellent ruler and a virtuous king for my people…
A thorn crawls into my heart, prickling it.
I can’t calm myself. It’s been in my mind for so long. Something that stops me from freeing myself from the pain and suffering that I have been through.
The distrust that was carved in my mind is making a conflict with the complicated feeling that I am experiencing.
It’s about her…
I know already…
.
.
.
BAM!
“Fonfon! It’s been already ten days already! What the hell are you still doing?!”
“Violetta? Ah, it’s been ten days you say? What of it?”
“Fon! How many days do you want to keep this up?!”
“Violetta… there’s a lot of work to be taken care of. If you don’t have any better things to say, please go back to your own business.”
“Asagao! Do you really plan to forget about Asagao?! Are you really going to let it end like this?!”
“…”
“Is it because of your distrust that was triggered?! Don’t you love her like a real little sister?!”
“It was only a façade that she showed, a trickery she performed. It was nothing more than an illusion.”
“Do you think the time you spent together was a lie?! If you had not left her there, you would know! Does she have no more value to you?!”
“I have no more reason to take her in.”
“You dragged her into this world, we dragged her to this world and the other heroes. Didn’t you even think about her feelings in a new world where she knows no one?”
“…”
“Yeah, she may be a twenty years old man inside as she said. But can’t you even hear her out?! She got herself in a foreign body, a body she didn’t know, with so little power and now, are you condemning her?!”
“…”
“How long do you want to keep up your pride?! The way you act right now is also childish, Fon!”
“Enough…”
“Did you even try to understand her feelings? Did you only want her beside you because of how she looks like?!”
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Her feelings? Do I have to consider her feelings after tricking us to believe about her real identity? However, was that all that I need to consider? Was it something I should even care about?
“Enough, Violetta.”
“What, did I hurt your pride?!”
“Are you here just to rant to me like that?!”
“I am! You… you even have to show that disgusted face to her. I bet it affected her so much…”
“Is that how it looks like to you?”
“Without context, yeah. Is your distrust so deep that you don’t even dare to hear her out and just straight walk out of the place?!”
“Hmph! You’re just angry because you and your lover got separated.”
“Fon! That’s got nothing to do with this!”
“I don’t have much time to comfort her or to play her games anymore. She already got what she wanted wasn’t she?! I have a nation to run! Don’t nag me about every little thing like that!”
“I… can’t believe you…”
“…”
“I promise you, you will die lonely and sad one day… you will be remembered as a great ruler and king but… none will mourn you as the man you are… you can’t move on from your past. You can’t move on from your fear and distrust…”
“...”
“You make me sick.”
“I see. Good for you.”
I know what loneliness is and have experienced abundant time to feel and adapt to it. My death spells nothing as long as I have achieved my goal for a prosperous kingdom built to be the pillar of a good generation.
I have taken pride for my achievement and I won't let anyone toil onto these pride that I hold. Irrationally lying to me means they think that I have little to no backbone to show and a repercussion won't follow.
That's how I always take things...
But...this discomfort I am feeling right now...
“…”
“By the way Violetta, your master he is—“
“He is strong! Yes! And the Alstroemeria girl. She is strong! Don’t tell me crap like you are interested in their strength! You’ve been asking that for the past ten days!”
“I see. I didn’t notice at all.”
“…”
“…”
“So that’s how it is.”
“What?”
“…You think that if someone is strong with Asagao… it’s fine to let her be.”
Do I?
Is it really what I think?
“What are you talking about Violetta?”
“Admit it Fon…”
“Admit what?”
“…”
“You must be mistaken.”
“You… are not being honest with yourself. It’s not like you.”
“…”
“Come on Fon. You already know about it yourself how you feel about it.”
How do I feel about it?
I know...I already know about the answer. Somewhere inside my mind, I am frantically making an excuse not to care about her, however, the longing, the forgiveness I want to spell out, and the love I wanted to show are all spilling out.
Whenever I look at Asagao, I cannot imagine she's a former man. No, even now, I think she is really meant to be a girl with her attitude. The logic behind her appearance is still unknown but her feelings towards me are genuine, I can easily tell that.
The reason...
The reason I can't face her now is that...
“I am… disgusted…”
“…”
“With myself… I am disgusted… because my mind, which works on logic, and experienced too much pain, is rejecting her trying to and wanting to forget her. But… my heart is screaming to put my trust to her. I don’t know…how to handle this turmoil inside me…”
“Good. I thought so.”
“Violetta… I am sorry for being stubborn for the past ten days. What should I do?”
“Fon… First… try to talk to her. That’s the basis of understanding each other. Try to sort your feelings with her words you should hear for yourself. After that, either you forgive her or condemn her. It’s up to you if you can accept her or not. After that, I don’t have anything to say anymore. I won’t bother you anymore about it.”
“I’m glad you are here…thank you for your fine advice and judgment, Violetta.”
“Haa… you are so stubborn and prideful that I need ten days to make you admit it.”
“I see. As expected of Violetta… But you are still angry about you and your lover getting separated.”
“I have to get you back about that later. For now, what do you want to do?”
“Well… I want to talk to her but…”
“… Fon… no more buts… make your decision swiftly.”
“I wan—“
“!”
“!”
This feeling… a huge presence is moving fast towards the capital. Its size is comparable to a large dragon. Without a doubt, Violetta-san is able to sense it too. I wonder what is it?
Violetta and I proceed to the castle front to see what’s coming.
…
What comes in our view is a large white dragon. Violetta-san didn’t even let raised her defense so I feel that she know this dragon.
Violetta indicates and instructs it to land at the battlefield behind the castle. As per her instructions, it lands at the field.
Then it gave off a bright light. The dragon transforms into a man with black hair and white scales on his jaw. Violetta-san approaches him and hugs him.
It seems to be her lover.
“Mrothgir! What are you doing here?”
“Violetta! Is Asagao here?!”
“Eh?! No… wait… what’s happening?!”
“Asagao… that child… is missing!”
Say what?!