It was my decision to reveal this to Alstroemeria, the death of her parents.

I did regard her feelings, her mental stability, her scarred past, however, I shouldn’t and wouldn’t keep her bounded from the tragic past that shackles her to cause internal grief that she cannot express.

I, Cecille, am guilty of Alstroemeria’s twisted upbringing, and this is the only time I can make amends of my own faults for continuously spoiling her, for continuously pretending to be her guardian, for continuously indulging myself to her smile that shrouds the deep scar in her heart.

If I tried to explain things to her in the past, chances are, she won’t come to terms with her own feelings.

That girl…

Asagao Lionheart gave me a chance to see a crack within Alstroemeria’s defensive emotional barrier. She was Alstroemeria’s biggest source of courage, even now, that prevented her from any dangerous breakdown.

It was her who promised to grow together with Alstroemeria, and kept that promise. She understood Alstroemeria immediately and she still keeps understanding her out of friendship, companionship, or through great affection.

The girl sees herself in the worst spectrum of people. What she doesn’t realize is that it all sounded as modesty. Her nature is far off from an evil person.

Asagao Lionheart, with all her might, reaches out for Alstroemeria and without a doubt, will keep reaching out to her. For me, that’s enough to deem her as kind and gentle.

For Alstroemeria who cannot determine black and white, Asagao Lionheart clears that black and white and make her world painted with myriads of colors.

It was not ideal but it was not the worst result.

If I can make a deal with a deity, I’ll sell my soul for Alstroemeria’s happiness.

That’s how I dearly cherish her, though I may not show it. It was to the point that I have involved myself in indirectly making this whole town suffer from what they have done to Alstroemeria from the past.

I don’t regret it, in fact, I felt even more relief that we don’t have any potential people that would most likely want Alstroemeria back.

I lied to Asagao Lionheart.

Alstroemeria’s parents, in the last minute, wanted to see her once again. I was present at both of their deathbeds. They sincerely wanted to apologize Alstroemeria but that’s one thing I cannot grant them or rather, on a personal level, won’t let them.

I’ve known the two of them when I investigated Alstroemeria’s background years ago. I didn’t take much time to find out about Tzari who gave tutelage to Alstroemeria, and her parents.

If I have to put in words how I see them, it’s simple.

Detestable.

Maybe they aren’t half bad at all but as parents, they are miserable. I’ve talked with them before without mentioning of my relationship with Alstroemeria and I learned how they aren’t remorseful for what they did to her until they have stepped death’s door.

Pity?

Fuck that.

I have seen worse, I have seen a lot worse but, it’s a whole lot different when it’s about Alstroemeria. I know her value and it’s priceless beyond comparison for me. Ties as a family that was born through bonds.

If she finds out about what I did and hated me for it, I’m also fine with that. It must only be a means to give comfort to myself when that moment comes but I’d rather see a new side of her born out of growth.

I don’t want her to grow through a bad experience but it was to this extent that I can help her through emotional stress.

I am equally bad and a scum for trying to control her up to this point but I’m also fine with that.

Manipulative, obsessed, liar, and most of all, selfish. Describe me with every single word out there that can reflect a scum, as long as Alstroemeria smiles, as long as she can be capable of other emotions to portray, as long as she grows into a better but joyous girl, I will keep being the villain behind the curtains.

If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it.

It’s all self-satisfaction in the end admittingly.

“Is there something else weighing your mind, Miss Cecille?”

“Hmm? No, none.”

“Didn’t we decide to be honest with Alstroe?”

“I know…”

Asagao Lionheart called out to me with a worried voice. What kind of face am I making to warrant anxiety from this little girl?

“Umm…Do you usually squint your eyes when you are in a bad mood?”

“Here I was thinking you’d say something serious…”

“Ehehe…”

Hmm…?

How considerate, this child.

She was trying to lighten the mood subtly and it did shed slight of my weariness and worries. No guilt because I feel no remorse for my actions.

What I talked about with Asagao Lionheart and Miss Daisy will be known to Alstroemeria, albeit I won’t disclose anything regarding her parent’s true feeling before they died.

With all the efforts poured, I shouldn’t leave Alstroemeria hanging in there, lamenting the death of her parents and come clean…

I walk towards Alstroemeria with Miss Asagao and Miss Daisy in tow. I feel a little bad and bitter for treating two princesses like an escort like this, more like, if someone finds out that I’ve treated them in a more unseemingly manner, I’d get scorn from a lot of people who supports Miss Asagao.

The person herself isn’t aware that she has a lot of supporters, saying that if the current king, Ashfon Astlan Lionheart, will not conceive an heir, it’s better for Asagao Lionheart to inherit the throne.

Thing is, that’s not a simple matter anymore due to her multiple affiliations with a lot of country leaders and more organization I may be unfamiliar with it.

One more is Daisy Aestasia…

Her father the previous beast king, the late King Folga, still remained to have an appalling influence throughout the land. I’d get not only the scorn of humans but also the beasts kin.

Wait…

I took this job with an ulterior motive but it is sailing quite smoothly if we disregard our personal circumstances. I haven’t even used most of the rewards King Ashfon previously graced me with and yet, why do I have the feeling that I’ll be receiving an absurd amount again?

My motto in life is to live modestly, yet, those words crumble to pieces.

Now my head is spinning with these useless thoughts!

“Now you’re knitting your brows with a grimace that can make an adult run.”

“There you go again, Miss Asagao. Are you bringing the mood up again?”

“N-no…I’m serious.”

Bastardous grimace!

You might be the one at fault for my inability to find a husband!

Not that I really need one anymore.

Alstroemeria is enough of a burden for me for the rest of my life. She will be the weight that I will painstakingly pull just to see her float again.

At last, I stood behind Alstroemeria who is still looking down at the makeshift graves her parents. She didn’t turn around as if she pre-occupied by a lot of thoughts in her mind.

Or so I thought.

I place a hand on her shoulder, albeit there's a needs to lower my posture a little because of how small she became. I was expecting it to shudder or tremble a little but her body remains calm. So calm that she only places her hand on mine.

“……”

“Alstroemeria…I…I want to say something…”

“Hmm…?”

CREAK

“OH…OH! AHHHH!”

I immediately let out a scream as Alstroemeria crushes my hand which I placed on her shoulder. I flail my whole body to get away because of the sensation my bones grinding with each other. I feel like each of those bones will snap.

“AAGAGAGAHAHHHHH! It’ll break! I give up!”

“I’m disappointed…”

Alstroemeria lets go of my hand throbbing with pain. She really didn’t break any bones but I swear I felt some grinding. I took a step back and straightened my posture while still comforting my hand that she almost crushed just now.

However, that one word caught me really hard that dull the pain in my hand immediately.

Disappointed…

Alstroemeria said she was disappointed at me. If anything, it makes me a little happy that she felt such emotion and openly expressed it but, it doesn’t sit right when it was in this kind of situation.

“Alstroemeria, there’s something I’d like to talk about.”

“I’ve already heard it.”

She said while pointing at her ear.

…

……

………

I look at Miss Asagao and Miss Daisy and to my expectations, Miss Daisy tilted her head in confusion, however, Miss Asagao’s ceramic white complexion turned, even more, ghastlier with widened eyes of realization.

Following her visage of expression, I immediately felt cold on my feet.

We forgot that this girl, Alstroemeria, is a superhuman and she can hear, smell, sense, and even taste far better than anyone else.

Ah…

With Alstroemeria’s judging eyes that pierce me, I immediately felt it.

I am much guiltier than I thought, not because of what I did to her parents and to this village, but to what I’ve done to Alstroemeria and to her feelings.

I deemed it necessary for her to grow but this budding feeling of regret and guilt sharply stabs me at this moment. Being glared at the girl I treated as a family in my lonely life hurts.

Since I cannot bear any more of her silent gaze, I immediately prostrated in front of her with my forehead digging into the dirt.

“Umm…ughh…I’m…really sorry…I know it’s not enough.”

She didn’t utter any words as she detached her sight from and starts glaring at Miss Asagao.

“Alstroe, I want you to know that I’m always on your side.”

Upon Miss Asagao’s words, Alstroemeria approaches her with a pitter-patter and completely stops in front of her.

Alstroemeria closes her eyes and leans her head on Asagao’s bosom.

She wordlessly does so for a few seconds before grabbing Miss Asagao’s hand and started dragging her away. Most likely she’ll go inside the house together with Miss Asagao.

There, Miss Daisy and I are left in a daze.

Without breaking posture of my prostration, I turn my gaze to Miss Daisy and in response, she only shrugs.

“Damn it…Tzari should also be here to receive such disdain…”