It hurts…it hurts beyond imagination…

It left me powerless, helpless, weak, and in agony. The throbbing pain in the place where my tails are cut off bleeds. I’ve received a lot of painful attacks from the past. They are strong, powerful, and can even cause an instant death.

However, the pain right now is indescribable. The tail that I cared for so much not only because it’s part of me but Asagao loves them.

“Bad…this is bad. That was fun! You really croak well. Ahahaha!”

“Kuh…”

I can only stare at him as I writhe in pain. Even my sight is even blurry as I grit in torment. I lost a considerable amount of blood that I can feel the lightheadedness. Even though I proceeded cautiously, he, Flow, got the best out of me.

It was not because I am weak, but because he is just too much for me…

That…I accepted…he is a better than me…

I do not feel despair, I do not fear towards him, just the frustration that after all what I’ve done, I am reduced to nothing but a helpless girl bathed in her own blood.

Is this how painful Asagao felt? With this, do I truly understand her sufferings? The things that she carries, is it as heavy as this?

Is this enough for me to feel enough connection to my father?

My head is only filled with those sad thoughts.

However, it hits me…

Did…Asagao wants to see me like this? Doesn’t Asagao do everything so we don’t have to experience the pain she has gone through?

Or…she just simply did everything she thinks was right regardless of what torment, grief, or even heartbreak she experiences?

The more I try to learn, the more questions just pile up…

I can’t even figure out why I wanted to view everything from Asagao’s perspective. Is it simply because of my obsession? Is it simply because I love her that I want to truly empathize with her?

Or…I just want to project my father with her? Her father…is also my father…

What I wanted to happen to her and me is considered a taboo. I am aware of it, however, if I really do see my father to her at this point…I have no excuse if Asagao hates me…

“Really now, why become quiet so sudden? You were barking earlier! Was it all bluff?”

Flow nonchalantly threw my tails aside as it was trash. He slowly walks towards me and I have no way of escaping now but to crawl backward.

Even if I said that I do not fear him, I fear…for my life. That’s the reason why I took the challenge of fighting him. If I escaped earlier, it was no better than death itself. It was my pride telling that if I let that woman, Mimosa, who is Asagao’s friend die, I have no face to show.

“Ahahaha…were you really that terrified with the thought of your tails being torn off from your butt? Shame, I could also do the same to the people you love so much.”

This man…

“I’ll tear each and every remaining tail that you have and listen to your screaming voice as you suffer in agony. You showed a decent and considerable skill, but you are no warrior, you are just a child. In the wild, the strong eat the weak. I, Flow, wants to be at the top of the food chain. Since coming to my senses from a wild beast, I long to be a strong warrior to stand up for myself, a lone wolf.”

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The strong…eats the weak…?

“I became the Arcana of Gluttony because of my desire to consume, however, that desire completely changed to a more factual matter when I met Lord Nil. My view of the world changes and I lost all compatibility to perform Divine Ascension, however, I retained my power to become the Arcana of Gluttony. It proves that whatever circumstances, my desire to prey on the weak is unwavering. And now, you are my prey.”

….Really…now…

“Shut up…I don’t give a damn about your dumb philosophy…”

“Oh?”

I can’t believe that I concede to this guy mentally.

This is unsightly of me…

Painful…it hurts…however…if I am to brought down by someone by the likes of him, I can’t accept. I won’t let him have his way. I won’t let him do what he wants.

I can’t believe I am saying this after what I said to Asagao that I will live for her, but at this moment, at this time, I will burn out every energy, life, and blood that I have to stop this man!

Prey on the weak?

My desire or not, my wishes or not, I don’t care anymore. How many times does it take me to understand so much about Asagao through this kind of situation? I don’t care.

My father rests now and Asagao is still breathing. What do I need to understand other than that?!

I’ll apologize, I’ll kneel down in front of everyone whom I have wronged. I will even try to overcome my aversion to men, I will do all of that if I live here.

I don’t expect that though…However, I am not going to let this guy have his way! Even though I already found a conviction earlier just to be shattered by simple tails being ripped off, I will keep finding new ones even though it is getting tiring and repetitive.

“I…I won’t let you have your way. You are nothing more than a beast who lost to his instinct and performs barbarism as he likes!”

“Oh? And you?”

“I lost! I lost to you! I lost on my thoughts! I lost to my self-loathing self with daddy issues! I am fine admitting that! Why? Because it gives me more questions to find answers for!”

“Ahahaha…so this is what Lord Nil is talking about…how they grow this strong…”

“What are you mumbling about?!”

I don’t understand anymore. The confusion is mixed with pain and tormenting thoughts of every damn thing.

I stood my ground, staring at him, gritting my teeth, and clenching my fist so hard that my nails sunk into my palms.

“Ohoho? What are you planning to do?”

“You said you were going to rip my tails off, right?”

“Ah, I was about to do it.”

“Too bad.”

“[Purifying Flames of the Gods – Compressed!]”

From my words alone, Flow readies his stance as if he will dodge, however, my target is not him. The compressed golden flame that shoots out a laser-like flame was not directed to him but to…

“ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”

“Wha-?! You!? ARE YOU INSANE?!”

I burned each and remaining tails that I have. All of it, to crisps, the smell of the burning flesh entered my nose, however, it didn’t bother me even as the pain coursed throughout my body. I even thought that my lung will come out from my scream. Tears endlessly and violently flow from my eyes.

The pain…not enough…if it is something like this, I can endure it!

I did it until nothing is left but a burnt back. The bleeding is already stopped because of the crisps skin. A portion of my hair came along with my tails.

It’s suicidal, it’s stupid, it’s even something a madman would actually do, however, the look on his face when I did that, it was priceless. He paled and sweat profusely streams down from his face with a gaping mouth.

I couldn’t help but smile at his dumb expression.

I didn’t stagger even one bit, I didn’t move away from the flames, I didn’t even blink a single time as I self-injure myself.

It’s my first win against him.

“You…did you just…?”

“Ahahaha! I got you. You can’t tear off what’s not there!”

“You did that just to mock me?! You just burned every tail you had just to mock me?!”

“That’s how I hate you.”

“Bad…this is bad…you…you are INTERESTING! You! Your recklessness and insanity are comparable to my Lord!”

“The second thing that I will beat in you is that I will crush your philosophy! The prey will eat the predator! The third thing that I will beat you in is your belief that I am comparable to your lord! I will show you that despite what I did, I am no insane. It will greatly devalue my worth. The fourth is, I will defeat and kill you.”

Far from insane, I can feel everything clearing up as I can only focus on the pain in my butt. I wonder what would Asagao say about it.

I want to see her disapproving face, or is it concerned? Maybe she will reprimand me, or she will just hug me wordlessly. I can’t wait…

“Those tails are the sign of your power growing.”

“It’s nothing but an accessory. The real measure of my power is beyond that.”

“Oh? You bark but you are literally bathing in your own blood, pales with so much blood that you lost, and tired.”

“That’s trivial. I will beat you.”

Let me give you a hand!~

…Who?

Though you are already using my power to its full extent, well, a little moral support won’t get in your way, right?

I’m asking who are you…

Teehee!~ I’m Asteria!~ I believe you already met my niece and nephew! Don’t mind me and go! Beat the bad guy!

Hmph, I’ll return to you later. For now…

With every Ki that I have, with every magical power that I have excluding Astlan’s Ira, I gather them at one place, to my core.

Even though I am tired, even though that my mind is getting fuzzy, I still have a lot of magical power inside of me. I am still learning Ki, however, simply manipulating it is enough for now.

Something inside me, I can feel my heart pulsating loudly. My chest feels like it is on fire, the same as my spirit. It sounds superficial but the sensation is so real.

I lost my thoughts with all those questions, however, I found a definite answer.

In my heart…something lits up…

“I will win.”

A burst of golden light explodes from my body.

It didn’t hurt, on the contrary, it was pleasant, like I am being enveloped in warm light. The purity of my fire has never been this beautiful. Even I am amazed that I could produce such flames…

In exchange for all the lost tails, the ephemeral flames started aligning behind me and molding themselves into a pointy shape.

Not long after, beautiful…sparkling…dazzling tails made out of golden flames reveals itself around me. I didn’t do anything, the flames just sprung up and form themselves.

I felt…blissful…

“Ah…it is as Lord Nil said…make them suffer and they will grow before you know it. She was just…writhing in pain earlier but now…she is dazzling and filled to brim with power. Truly a cheat characters!”

Flow said such words…

Even I am baffled, however, with this, I am several steps closer now…to her.