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<07/13/2011 - 15:25 | 1010 Link Street, Marietta, GA, USA>
"Right. I'll be there then." I hung up the phone before Maddison could object, and inhaled another deep breath to calm my jittery nerves. With the notebook in my other hand, I stood up taller, trying to psych myself into what I was about to do.
Today is the day! This is the moment where I'll finally break my silence and tell somebody everything about me, and I mean everything! The notebook in my hand wasn't just any notebook; it was my whole diary, laying out all the personal facts about the Altiri, what happened to me, and how I feel about it. I've come to the conclusion that I have to tell somebody the truth. Somebody has to know about this.
Maddison is not really my first choice of people I'd want to share a secret with, but she's still the only one on my contact list who answers the phone, and also conveniently around the other corner of the houses and roads of the same neighborhood. Somebody has to listen to me. Somebody has to believe me!
I've already started walking towards her house, having set up the plan to reveal this to her. I've only acted like I wanted to just hang out without any further context. Once I'm there in person, I'll let on that I have something important, a huge secret I must tell somebody. There's too much to say however; it's the reason my words and thoughts don't come out the same way. So, I'm going to show this entire notebook to her instead. I'll stand there while she reads the document, waiting for her to understand what the past year has been like for me.
Right as I was reaching the area Maddison was in, I convinced myself not to back out of this. I have to do this! I have no choice! I've barely kept myself together since my earlier mental break down, and I'm not going to last much longer without some kind of support. Even if I have trouble convincing her Lumina is real, just talking about Lumina again should make me feel better.
Normally, my convoluted plans never pan out the way they should. It seems today would be the exception to the start of this. I acted as normal as I could, and held the notebook out in front of me, tantalizing Maddison's eyes with its glory.
"What is that? Summer homework?" Maddison still took the notebook, flipping it open to the first page with curiosity.
"No Maddison. It's my personal journey. I don't really know how to explain to you what's been going on with me, so I want you to start reading that thing instead." I had to at least drop the first hint now, since the same declaration is on my very first journal entry. "I've been hanging out with someone who isn't from this world, and I've been wanting somebody to talk to about this."
Maddison's eyes squinted asynchronously in disbelief, but found their way back onto the pages of the notebook I gave her. It was going to take her some time to read through all fifty pages front and back, so I told myself to be as patient as possible and just wait this out. Maddison slowly walked her legs over to the back of her step-father's car, so that she could relax some part of her body while continuing to read.
Meanwhile, I just stood there awkwardly, shaking in anticipation for how she might react. I've finally done it! I won't be able to take it back now. Another human as of today knows the Altiri secret! I've been trying to hide it for so long, I've become nervous at the sheer thought of revealing this secret to anybody. Now that I'm in the process of it, I know I cannot turn back from here, but it's still so damn scary!
More than ten minutes passed, when the notebook closed onto Maddison's thumb, inserted as an informal bookmark. I could see the outer piece of the page sticking out, with the number '7' on the corner, indicating the progress. Maddison just stared at me, uncertain how either of us were supposed to be taking this.
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Then, to my utter amazement, Maddison dropped the notebook, needing both of her hands to hold her mouth in strong laughter. It was obvious as day that she was laughing directly at me, at my situation, at my story; everything about me!
"What's so funny? Come on! I'm serious!" Red in the face with shame and frustration, I stamped my arms behind me. "I'm not trying to yank your chain or anything. All of this stuff is really happening around me."
"A space alien? Your girlfriend is a space alien?" Maddison didn't wait for me to answer, she just entered another laughing fit, insulting my sanity to my face.
I promptly took back my notebook, assuming she wasn't going to read it anymore. "I know it's hard to believe, but please let me talk to you about her."
Maddison only continued her laughter, knowing it made me much more nervous and anxious inside. Eventually, she dialed it back and made her choice. "If you say so. I'm going outside for a walk."
Not so fast! "Okay, then I'll join you." My choice to follow her around didn't seem to disturb her, but it was hard to tell. She was still trying not to laugh, so any expression she had - hid behind what humored her.
I followed Maddison outside as she started to walk on the thin sidewalk, trying my best to open up some conversation with her. I need to know what she understands. "She and I met a while ago Maddison. It was rather forced. I didn't get a say in the matter. But over time, I found that I could trust her more, as I learned more about the telepathy."
Giggling again, Maddison let slip what had her cackling so hard earlier. "This is awesome! You're completely insane!" This is what Maddison was laughing at, hearing a story like she's never heard in any lifetime. Before I could even respond to her insult, she held up her smart phone with two hands, announcing her actions to us. "I'm so sharing this with everyone on Facebook." Maddison's excitement peaked at the mere idea of spreading the story about my insanity to literally everyone.
Conversely, my upset erupted through my body in screams. "Don't share that stuff on Facebook! It's supposed to be a secret anyway! What is wrong with you?!" God! Does she not understand how messed up it would be if everybody knew about this?
Maddison just chuckled some more, viciously typing on the soft keys, adding to her story, to whatever she wanted to add. Having had enough, I moved into take her phone from her, but was stopped beyond a muscle twitch before I could do anything. The large guy coming out the front door was yelling at us both, as he must have noticed me yelling earlier. "What are you two doing out there? Why did I hear yelling?!"
Maddison and I didn't go very far on our walk, only right outside her house. So, her step-father must have seen or heard enough to know I was bothering her. I couldn't say anything back to him, but Maddison was bothering me too, threatening to post that private stuff on social media. If everyone at school finds out about this, I'll forever be ruined, outcast in every single aspect. If my parents find out, they'll send me off to a mental institution. I have to stop her!
But I can't do anything now. That guy is trice my size. Maddison's step father wasn't the kind of person anybody would want to mess with, as he isn't nice anyway. His stern attitude seemed to shut Maddison up, as she decided on her own to retreat back indoors, into a place I'd now never reach her again. I was only allowed inside on certain occasions, but after I was caught raising my voice in anger to the girl, her step-father was giving me this menacing look, a look that told me I'm banned from being near this house forever.
Everything just happened so fast, so my mind had to recap and play catchup. Not only did Maddison make a mockery of me for what I believed to be true, she laughed in my face, didn't care one bit about how I felt, and posted that stuff on her profile! If that's not a failure, I don't know what is.
The reminder of how awful the plan went finally sank in, with the gravity of this horrible moment making me wish I were dead. My eyes filled with tears again as I stood on the street, until I could hold them in no longer. I ran away, sprinting as fast as I could on my legs with my eyes mostly shut, unable to see through the constant sobbing I did all the way back home. For as long as I could, I just kept running. I wanted to be as far away from here as possible.
With nowhere else to go, I ran into the house with my face wet with sadness, peddling my legs up the stairs until I made it to my room. There was nothing left to do in here but to lie in bed with my face smothered by the mattress and my fist hammering at the pillow above me. How could I have been so stupid?