Ch: 208 Nothing Will Come Of Nothing
Gary and Shai were ‘Gone Fishing’ on Seahorse, while Becky and Angie were taking their first sailing lessons on Esperanza with Dante, Yusef and Marc; along with the rest of the Bathers.
Which left the kids in the care of auntie Esperanza. They spent an exhausting morning climbing all over Esperanza’s bounty. They clambered up the rigging, swung down lines and leapt into slack sails like trampolines until they were ready for the unheard of, an early naptime, without complaints!
Esperanza settled into a dryland chair, beside a dryland fireplace for a little ‘Ranza Time’, with a deep and appreciative sigh. “This one needs a little peace and quiet…”
A heavy knock landed on the door, shaking her from her reverie. With a grumbled complaint to the spirits of Air and Water, she rose and answered the door.
Outside, a small troop of War cultists in full kit stood, shifting nervously behind a War priest in his ceremonial armor. At the door stood a handsome, neatly bearded, dark haired man in early middle age, wearing the armor of a knight commander of war, embellished with golden scrollwork, suggesting a lord, in addition to his military rank.
“Esperanza, captain of Esperanza’s bounty, late of trade barge Esperanza?” He demanded, when she slid the door open.
“This one is she… the master and mistress of the house are away, what brings a troop of warriors to this home?” She asked suspiciously.
“Ranza?” Amy asked sleepily from the stairs, her two brothers lined up behind her. “Whas’ goin’ on?”
The lord in shiny armor ignored the kids and firmly announced, in his ‘knight of Order’ voice. “Esperanza, you are under arrest for flight from a crime, escaping a lawful quarantine and suspicion of assault on a ducal officer. Come with me quietly.”
The usually unflappable trader stared in disbelief for a bit too long, until the knight stepped forward and firmly took her arm, pulling her out of the house.
“You better not, Fargnie!” Amy shouted at the armored lord. “Gary’s gonna be mad if you take her away!” The two boys had instruments in hand suddenly, raising a quiet noise on the stairs.
“No, children!” Ranza snapped at them, bringing silence down on the inn. She turned to the warriors with a glare. “This one has a duty to mind these young sailors and cannot accompany you. I will submit for arrest when their parents return. Acceptable, my lord?” She asked, as humbly as she could manage.
“No, not acceptable.” He answered coldly. “Take her, take the children as well.”
The music started again, making the shadows lurch and squirm angrily as Amy filled her lungs in preparation. “Amy, boys… do nothing. Cooperate and come quietly.” Ranza ordered. “That is a command from your captain, junior sailors.”
The War troopers outside had been shifting about in formation, nervously looking from their commander, in red armor, to the lord, in silver and over to the side, where a priest in the golden robes of Healer waited, out of sight.
Sensing their hesitation lord Fargnanhagn barked his order again. “Seize them Shaheen, on my authority.”
The War priest turned on his reluctant troopers and snapped at them. “Go! Now!” With Telemain Shaheen at their head, a very uncomfortable troop stomped into the house and took the children, while Shaheen placed a silence collar on Esperanza.
“Mind my orders little ones…” The click of the collar ended her commands suddenly, drawing a ferocious set of angry glares from them all.
“Sorry kids.” Trooper Harry muttered quietly to Wilford. The burly toddler was not resisting being held by the warrior… he wasn’t happy about it either.
“Silence in formation, trooper!” Shaheen snapped. “Harry, Jason, Grenlow, follow priest Ali. He will be in charge of the children. Follow his orders without fail, or answer to me.”
At the sight of Ali in his golden robes, Rio went wild. He struggled in Grenlow’s arms, thrashing and flailing. He scratched, pummeled and bit at the armored man, until Amy reached out and touched his wildly struggling form. “It’s ok, Rio. Gary an Shai will come… they are gonna be mad, too.”
The children were still gripped in the arms of War troopers, who seemed even less enthusiastic after the tiny girl’s dire warning. Ali strode closer, looking at Rio with a strange light in his eyes.
“Do you remember me? My little Mohammed…” He whispered.
Rio resumed his struggles for a moment, until Amy hissed at him. “Be still, remember Ranza’s orders. I’ll keep you safe.”
“Silence urchin, I speak with my son!” Ali barked at the tiny girl. He turned with a feral snarl, when Rio’s thick green loogie splatted into his ear, accompanied by the pained grunt of the trooper Wilford managed to kick in the codpiece, while struggling to get closer to his brother and sister.
Ali glared at the two extra children and snapped at his troopers. “Follow me… and restrain those filthy whelps.” He marched away without a backward look, as two armored troopers took Esperanza by her elbows and led her away in a different direction, under the instructions of Shaheen.
Fargnahagn turned to the rest of his troop and smiled coldly. “Search the dwelling for contraband or suspicious items… report any findings to me at the temple of Order. Be thorough, you need not be careful… a little property damage is to be expected.” He waved happily, as he strode off in his shiny silver suit, his sword swaying merrily as he walked.
#
Dukes Rummel, Belen, Mubarak and the duchesses were all holding on for dear life, as Barney, the old sailor cut his razor sharp bow through the waters with a whoop of unrestrained joy. Kingfisher was fast, too bloody fast, she slashed through the waves, hurling spray and leaping like a live thing…
Her noble passengers were as pale as the white, rippling sails above them; even the usually dusky skin of the newly minted duchess Jaspreet was waxen and drawn.
“I said a pleasant sail… master Barney!” Julius yelled over the screaming wind.
“Aye, pleasant indeed!” The old man shouted back. “Now let’s give her some room to run…” The mad old geezer hauled a rope taut and the ship lurched into the wind, moving even more swiftly.
“HAhhahahahhaaa!”
Only Barney’s mad, cackling laughter could be heard over the rippling cloth and wailing winds.
#
Far upstream, in a pleasant little backwater, Seahorse rested at anchor, gently bobbing on the tiny wavelets. Wading birds took wing, flying madly away from the suddenly very noisy little craft. The loud ‘chok’ of a knife hacking the anchor line, embedding itself in the railing was the first sound. That was followed by a subsonic scream of tortured metal, as something underwater hurled the boat back downstream… Even faster than the kingfisher bird Barney’s yacht was named for.
#
At the temple of Healer, Amy and Wilford were dropped in a secure nursery, under the supervision of an aged nurse with a kindly smile. “Don’t be frightened, little ones. I’m nurse Jervis, I’ll be looking after you for a little while…”
“Where’s Rio?!” Amy barked at the woman. “Make ‘em bring back Rio! We gotta stay together!”
“Shush, child.” She said firmly. “Lord Ali is taking little lord Mohammed home, you need have no worries for him.”
#
“Hold still Mohamed! Let your mother dress you properly!” Miriam of Craft grumbled crossly.
“¡La mona aunque se vista de seda, mona se queda!” Rio snapped, while squirming out of her grasp once again.
“What is he saying? Does anyone know?” Ali demanded of the gathered servants, most of whom were busily trying to recapture the naked boy scampering around the sumptuous dressing room.
“¡El burro sabe más que tú! Pendejos!” Rio barked and chittered like a squirrel, clinging to a high chandelier, far out of reach.
“I said, you can dress a monkey in fancy clothes, but he’s still a monkey. After that I said a donkey is smarter than you… dumbasses!” He spat on them from high above, leering with anger and contempt at the lord and lady.
“Mohammed! Come down and behave right this instant!” Miriam bellowed, her face turning an unhealthy color.
“You mind your mother, young man!” Ali added, drawing Rio’s ire again.
“¡Hijo de las mil putas!” He yelled, clutching his wiener for accuracy, as he let fly a thick, golden braid of urine, showering onto lord Ali and his attendants.
#
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“Rio will be fine Wilf… Gary and Shai are coming…” Amy soothed her brother.
“He’s scared and alone.” Wilford said somberly.
“All right, we’ll go get him. Ranza’s gonna be mad we disobeyed orders though.” Amy grumbled unhappily. “Stupid lords.”
Old nurse Jervis had drifted off to sleep, smiling inanely in her dreams with her feet up on her desk in the corner of the nursery. They crept over to the door and tried the handle; locked, of course.
“Lift the keys Wilf, I’ll keep watch.” She whispered, peering down the hallway, through the wide window set in the wall. Nimble, pudgy fingers dipped into her purse and slipped the keys out with nary a jingle. Wilf climbed down the desk, just as silently as he’d climbed it and slipped the key into the lock, ever so carefully.
Amy secured the door from the outside and pulled the curtain across the window from the outside. “Ok, follow me Wilf!”
#
Two tiny kids came strolling down the hall of Healer’s temple, smiling and waving at familiar faces. At the door, a guard from Order looked down and smiled. “Aren’t you kids a little young to be wandering the temple district alone?” He asked gently.
“Yes, yes we are.” Amy replied firmly, with a pacifying wave of her free hand, as she strolled past with her brother’s hand in hers. “I haveta break the rules Wilf… we gotta find Rio.” She whispered.
The young knight in training smiled blandly and nodded. “Carry on then.”
At the gate to the noble quarter, two city guardsmen were stationed, as usual. They looked at the two tiny kids and halted their progress. “Waht are ye two wee bairns duin all alone?” Mickey asked. “Dae Gary an Shai ken ye are out alone?”
“No, no they dont.” Amy answered, flexing her gift as she spoke, breaking the rules once more.
“Fie, best come along. I’ll take thee home.” He muttered gently, seeming slightly dazed…
Amy stepped closer, holding up her palm, as though showing him something important. Softly, she whispered her Words.
Leeloo Dallas, Multipass!
“Aye, I see. Carry on, lass… carry on.” He said gently, guiding them through the gate, past his confused junior.
“Sir… I know I’m new…” He began.
“Never ye worry lad. She had her multipass.” He said, with a distant, confused smile, as he waved to the two wee tykes marching up the street.
#
Miriam was still screaming shrilly about her furniture and hiding behind a folding screen, while Rio tried to summon another turd to throw. He was tapped out, but the room was fuuuucked.
He giggled madly and swung his chandelier some more, making the servants scramble and panic.
A sedate knock at the door was followed by a tall man in formal attire, who soberly intoned his message into the chaos.
“Lord Corbin and lady Leeloo Dallas to see you my lord Ali, lady Miriam.”
He hardly noticed the shit smeared, urine sprayed condition of the formerly elegant chamber, as a pair of tiny kids stepped in with angry glares on their tiny faces.
“That will be all, Haskins.” Amy ordered firmly.
#
“You will follow my commands! Fall in and search this dwelling!” Shaheen bellowed at his subordinates.
“No, sir. That order is illegal.” Lang replied calmly.
“Trooper Davies, arrest sergeant Lang for insubordination.”
“Yes sir.” Davies said firmly. “You’re under arrest, sergeant, please don’t make trouble.” Lang nodded silently.
“Now, Davies, take the troops and toss that house. Be quick about it.” Shaheen snapped.
“No sir, That’s still an illegal…” Davies got cut off halfway through.
“Trooper Irving, arrest trooper Davies for Insubordination!”
Shaheen yelled, with spittle flecking his lips.
#
Trooper Finch was debating with sergeant Lang whether Lang could arrest Kimmel, while under arrest for insubordination, leaving each one under arrest to one degree or another, equally.
“I like your solution Finch… you’ll go a long way in the legion.” Lang said with a smile, while their commander stood nearby, turning colors. “Sorry, lord Shaheen, you’ll have to stay here and guard us… maybe they will send another platoon when we don’t come back…” Lang offered humbly.
He fell silent and a look of concern fell over his face as a loud crunching sound came from the waterside.
“Prisoners, form up! Lang called, bringing his troop to order. “Why don’t we go turn ourselves in to the officer of the day… my lord.” Lang said calmly. “Prisoner detail, head out.” Together they marched away, still discussing who had to fill out the arrest reports for whom.
“Shaheen… where be me bairns… answer quick, ere Gary arrives…” Shai snarled behind him. “Ye may yet survive, lest I must ask thee twice…”
#
Mickey the guard was still smiling blandly and waving everyone by, when two armed, armored, very large and very angry looking people flew by, straddling some strange machines. They hurtled past in near silence, garnering only a pleasant nod in passing from Jeremy’s superior. The young guard shrugged and saluted, just to be sure.
#
Amy had her uke slung low, strumming aggressively, just like Gary taught her. Rio’s drum and Wilf’s flute rose behind her, as she pursued her prey around the disgusting room.
La-da-da-da-da…
I'm gonna bury you in the ground!
La-da-da-da-da…
I'm gonna bury you with my sound!
Her sweet, warm voice sounded more sinister than charming; her lyrics caressed like serpent’s tongues, subtle, quick and menacing, holding the promise of danger.
“Stop this, child… I’m warning you!” Miriam shrieked at the tiny girl with the deadly cold gaze.
Sorry I'm not made of sugar…
Am I not sweet enough, for you?
The soft, sweetly gentle sound felt more like a razor’s kiss at her throat.
A moment later, the delicately carved and paneled door shattered, as a red armored man came flying through, with a familiar wailing, musical mace making a horrible noise against his crumpled breastplate.
“Give me my kids.” The madman snarled over the twitching, gasping body of Ali’s elite bodyguard, Merek.
“Gary!” All three terrible urchins turned and ran to him, clutching his armored legs and crying, as though they had not been dreadful and terrifying foes, just a few moments before.
A soft, wailing cry of terror and the clash of steel said Shai was busy elsewhere, with other guards, so Gary turned on the two nobles and their cowering servants, with a mad and hungry look in his eyes.
“Are you kids ok? Did anybody hurt you?” He growled at the nobles and their lackeys, rather than the kids.
“We’re ok… we didn’t even have to hurt anybody…” The calm sadness in Amy’s voice cooled his rage… a little.
“All right… so why are you naked, Rio?” He asked, while removing his mace from the weakly struggling man in the dented armor. There was an audible ‘Bong’ as the tortured metal popped and sprang back into a more breastplatey shape.
The lobster armored madman bent over his fallen foe and drew a wickedly curved bronze knife. He took a few savage slashes at the man’s body and stood with a feral grin.
“He won’t suffocate now… but he still won’t be causing any trouble for a while… Ali.” Gary snarled at the gold robed lord. He kicked the fallen man’s breastplate entirely away, now that he’d cut the straps and stepped over him.
“Sounds like Shai finished off the rest of your guards… She’ll be along shortly. While we wait, why don’t you tell me where my sister, Esperanza is?” He smiled very coldly, while the kids lined up behind him.
#
In the temple of Order, Esperanza was undergoing torture. The dismal stone walls seemed to loom in on her with a terrible weight, as though they were towering waves, coming to crash over her railings. The air tasted foul and thick, of earth and dirt all around. She felt crushed in the dismal prison cell, surrounded by unclean things, moving in the dark.
“Is she all right?” Squire Timmy asked his supervising knight.
“The prisoner? Yeah, Waterfolk always act like that. You should see what happens when we actually have to put one in a cell.” Jenkins whispered.
The poor woman was in a nicely appointed parlor with a daybed and a steaming tea service on the table. A lace curtained window opened onto the garden, filled with songbirds and a wide expanse of green lawns. The ‘cell door’ was a velvet rope across the doorway, signifying an administrative arrest, the lowest ‘security’ procedure.
“Try again, son. Maybe she’s calmed down.” Sir Jenkins suggested.
“Captain Esperanza… if you sign these forms you can go…” The young squire called gently to the forlorn woman. “Please, just sign here…?”
#
Esperanza docked beside Seahorse, who was halfway up on the pier and looked like she would need more work. “Ohh shit…” Becky whispered, before she vanished over the rail and dashed up to the house, while the rest were still staring at the wrecked boat in shock.
“Tawny, I need you!” She shouted a moment later, as alarm bells began to sound all over town.
#
“You filthy peasant… Witch! You bewitched my son! I’ll have you in the court of order and see you flayed as we did in the days of old!” Miriam shrieked and wailed, thrashing in her husband’s arms like a wild thing. “Abomnation! Halfdead filth! The void that you are will be devoured by my master, as your souls will be enslaved for eternity! Abominations all of you!”
She wailed even louder when Shai entered the room, shaking blood from her sword. “All will be devoured in the coming age of darkness and sorrow! Only the faithful shall…”
Ali stared at his wife in complete disbelief and confusion as blasphemies and horrid threats poured out in a continuous flood...
“Come out of there, kids.” Sir Tony’s calm voice came from behind them. “You’re done here.” The giant knight’s hand came down on Gary’s shoulder lightly. Gently the huge man pulled them out of the wreckage of the dressing room and handed them off to his two subordinates.
“Zach, Nat, escort these citizens home and remain with them please. We will sort this mess out when the duke returns this evening.”
He turned to the family of weirdos that had been ruining his digestion for most of a year and sighed. “Go home, stay put. Esperanza is being released even now. My squires will stay with you, you are not under arrest… There has been far too much of that lately already… so much paperwork.” He sighed sadly. “I could be out in the hills, painting happy little trees… there are no mistakes on canvas, just surprises and opportunities.”
“Tony, babe… you have got to meet the ghost of Bob Ross.” Gary sighed in utter exhaustion… Now I just gotta figure out who stole This Mortal Coil.”
#
Most of Telemain Shaheen was battered and bruised, or as much as could be seen around the dented and broken remnants of his armor. He was tied hand and foot, bound to the porch rail securely… except his head, that was lying in the dirt a few yards away, staring at the sky.
The inn door was open and inside was a wreck, broken instruments, food and furniture were scattered around and the workshop door had been broken off its track, lying on the stairwell landing below.
“Search for survivors.” Liam ordered, his voice loud in the silent home. “In pairs, stay together.”
He touched the silver earcuff in his right lobe and whispered. “Gary, Shai, respond.”
#
“All is well, Liam.” Shai said out of nowhere. “Ye’ll find Telemain Shaheen beaten an tied tae me porch like a stray dog… What!?” Shai’s voice raised to a shocked yell, before she got it back under control. She stopped still in the street, bringing her family and their escorts to a sudden halt as well. “Change of plan, kids. We go tae the orphanage an we stay there tonight.” Shai shot him the ‘no questions’ look so he shrugged and shut up.
#
Zach and Nat were new, the sons of upcountry lords sent to squire at the temple of Order this spring. They’d heard rumors of the madhouse at the orphanage but had never seen it. Now they sat at the roundhouse table and wondered what all the fuss was about. It was nice, cozy and decorated with a whimsical and charming style… but there was nothing odd or uncanny, save for the glass skylight roof. It felt strange seeing the sunset unfold above them, indoors.
Esperanza joined them shortly after they got home, escorted by another of Order’s squires, who departed after dropping her off, flustered and exhausted. She flew to the children, ignoring Gary and Shai entirely.
“My babies! Are you well?” She hugged and squeezed until she was satisfied that they were ok, then staggered over to Shai and collapsed into her arms.
“This unworthy failed you… again.” She moaned and sobbed, until Shai dragged her off to the bath and bed.
“Bath and bedtime seems right, kids… Let’s end today and try for a better one tomorrow.” He shot a warning glance at the two squires. “No funny business while we’re sleeping. You’re guarding us… but I’m watching you.” He grumbled suspiciously, before the bath door closed behind them.
Gary felt Tony and a few others come in while he was putting the kids to bed. Shai was still soothing Ranza and the little ones in the bedroom, when he went down to confront the forces of the law alone.
As soon as he appeared, Tony stood, still in his full armor, still waiting in the entryway. “Hit me with all the bad news Tony.” He said, sadly waving the knight and the two men behind him. One was an anonymous armored war cultist. His visor was up, but he was no one Gary recognized, even a little.
The other man was a small fellow in Order priest robes, fancy piping at his collar said he was a minor noble at least and probably a legal scholar of some kind, judging by the ink stains at his slightly frayed cuff.
They sat and changed into slippers at Tony’s urging, even though Shai allowed shoes in her house… Gary didn’t say anything… watching them put on silly animal slippers was probably the most fun he was going to get from this meeting.
“If you curl your toes… they usually do something silly…” Tony whispered excitedly. He demonstrated, making his gray velvet elephant slippers unfurl their trunks.
“Oh, that is fun!” The robed man whispered back, when his mouse slippers wiggled their ears for him.
When they had finished changing, Tony turned to the squires. “You are relieved, head back to the temple. You are both at liberty tomorrow.”
The two young men saluted and dipped out, before their superior could change his mind. They fled into the gathering evening as Shai came downstairs looking exhausted.
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