Ch: 173 Cool Story, Bro…

When the mammals and arachnid were gone, the leaves and needles rustled again, in a quiet susurrus of laughter.

“I think they bought it.” Maple whispered.

“Oh, the boy is a terrible influence on us…” Sequoia whispered, taking her insect form and slipping into the bubbling hot spring with a few of the others. Holly, Yew and Hawthorn were chatting with Oak and Olive by the small geyser that chuffed warm, pleasant scented steam into the air, every few minutes.

“If it means soaking my roots in this soil, I’ll put up with the undead one… He seems to have been curbed nicely, anyway.” Hawthorn murmured.

“That’s fine for you, Holly and Yew…” Olive murmured, stumbling over the tricky pronouns. “I can’t just whip annoying ghosts into shreds, my branches do nothing special against the immaterial and unliving.”

“Are you frightened of mortal shades, Olive? Fig asked kindly.

“They are fascinating, but I have no desire to be haunted like your niece, Strangler Fig. I believe Maple has an experimental grove that you may find interesting.” Olive settled deeper into the pool, enjoying sensation, Despite Fig’s carrying on.

Fig took a seat on the stones, to better lecture her juniors. “Mortals, especially humans, often find trees to be soothing, when they contemplate their mortality. Some even plant trees in their graves… naturally we have become a part of their culture and spirituality. Let me tell you the tale of Dionysus and Prosymnus…”

#

It came to pass that in the ancient times, largely forgotten; the gods did strive against and with each other. So too, did they truck with mortals in ways now considered… unseemly.

In those days, Dionysus found a need to descend into the realms of the dead and forgotten… The why of it is another tale. Few are the passages that can lead to that place, which only mortals can find, one way or another.

Long, the god of intoxication, wine and physical exuberance sought a way there; until he met Prosymnus, who dwelt near the bottomless lake and fished its depths. He offered to show the beautiful one how to pass into the realm which only mortals may enter with ease, but from whence, they may not return. His price was that coin which may be spent in pleasure and spent again, without end, so long as vigor and loins withstand.

That good, if naughty man took the god’s promise and guided him on the path, leading the lovely divinity nearly to the gates of the underworld before he withdrew… After many perils and trials, the libidinous one returned to the realms of man by another path, his mission accomplished.

Dionysus returned for his promised assignation, after only a few short years, to find that his guide had been unable to make his way back, having traveled too far down the path he showed the god.

A Contract is a bond of trust, magic and law, as such must be fulfilled. Dionysus stood by his friend’s grave and wept, for to breach a bond is woeful to the divine. Long he stood and wept, his sweet tears brought forth a tree from the fisherman’s grave, growing tall and strong, during the divine vigil.

One sturdy limb, thick and stout, jutted up from the tree, having grown swollen and knobbed. Seeing this, Dionysus took that branch and with arts secret and divine, crafted a tool for his singular purpose.

It is said that once the divine backside had been spitted on that living phallus, completing the oath and Contract, fruit sprang forth from such trees, ever after.

Men say this explains the puckered pink orifice that can be seen at the bottom of every pendulous, gently swelling fig.

#

“Why thank you sister Fig, now I shall remember that story… forever…” Maple said sourly.

“Bloody Wheatford…” She grumbled.

#

“Tony said his ritual would draw the gaze of Order for the trial… I really didn’t feel like sharing any info with that guy, so I dipped out and let Ragy take me for a little walk…” Gary smiled gleefully.

“When Order tried to sync up to my most chaotic parts, he bounced back and suddenly, I didn’t need to be in court any more.” He said happily, perched on a toadstool in the dream garden.

“What about the other one?” Becky asked quietly. “I didn’t like him at all.”

“Oh yeah, he suuucks. Don’t worry about him. He’s learning important lessons about friendship, sharing and being your best self, from a colorful herd of ponies…” Gary stopped talking and concentrated hard for a moment.

“Ok, now there’s a magical library inside a hollowed out golden oak tree. That was a nearly a missed opportunity!”

“An oak tree… Like the one in that cartoon you made me watch? About the colorful ponies?” Becky asked calmly. “You could have done that all along? Just summoned a magical library?”

“Uhh…” He stammered

“I bet it’s super neatly organized too…” Becky continued, sounding a little heated.

Gary looked this way and that, but found no ready escape path. “It’s about how I see things… when and how they fall into place…”

“A magical library that would have saved me and the others from having to dig through the mess that your mind is in…?” She demanded hotly. “Shai, whack him a good one please.”

“Nae sister, I dinnae buffet him such any more… or at least I shall try tae… Ye must venture the kicking of his arse yerself.”

“Ok, that’s fair,” Becky mumbled with a secret smile of pleasure at her sister’s personal growth. “...I’ll shove him down the stairs some dark night.”

“Aye, that be fine.” She murmured, nuzzling her boy happily.

#

Dawn didn’t break over Wheatford. The blessed sun rolled over the hills, saw it was raining and called the whole thing off, promising to try again tomorrow.

Huge, heavy drops pelted down steadily, soaking the town and washing everything clean… Except the unfortunate ones camping in the tents and pavilions outside the gates.

The pleasant grassy fields became trackless mires after the first dozen travelers churned the turf into mud.

The rain was warm and pleasant, but constant. Even the horses became frustrated by the deluge… In the interest of getting some exercise for the mounts and himself, Gary donned his red shortyshorts, to Shai’s delight.

“Oh? You wanna come along too?” He asked with a grin.

She grinned even more widely, when he handed her a similar outfit. Hers were brief, emerald green boyshorts with embroidered vines and pink roses in all the places where you would need to draw the eye.

They came with a coordinating top, in the form of a lightly structured and stretchy garment with cheeky little blossoms stitched over the nipple zone and shoulder straps to keep things jiggling just the right amount.

He hopped on Annie and trotted the herd out into the rain for a run and held out a hand to her, when she emerged from the stable in her new swimwear.

Shai ignored his proffered hand and vaulted up onto Annie’s back, landing in front of him and taking control with a vigorous wiggle of her backside, nestling some of his favorite parts of her, firmly against some of her favorite parts of him. With a grin he felt, rather than saw, she took his hands from her hips and placed them over her breasts, with a friendly little ‘honka-honka’… to make him feel extra welcome.

She leaned back against his chest and sighed as the warm rain washed over them.

“I’ve been thinking about what you said, love… about ‘buffeting me around’. I never really thought about it, but yeah, I love rough and tumble Shai.” He whispered in her ear. “But I’d like to see soft and sweet Shai more often.”

“Ye forgive me, boy?” She asked, leaning back so her hair could tickle his nose.

“I’ll administer a spanking tonight…” He growled softly. “You have been naughty.”

“Aye, ‘tis true… an I shall be most repentant, when ye do soothe sweet Shai’s poor, red fanny… wi yer tender attentions.”

#

Drying, grooming and tending the hooves of the whole herd after their rainy day exercise, sucked some of the romance from the experience… it was still damn magical. Thank the gods and spirits for conjured towels; the amount of laundry involved otherwise, would have been crippling.

“I’d ride in the rain we thee any day, lad of mine.” Shai cooed in his arms under a blanket by the fire, once they were warm and dry again.

The rest of the day passed as tranquilly as one could hope for… in Gary and Shai’s house.

#

Baron Flavius Hreth was feeling more than a little nervous… That Oddsman the guild had maneuvered him into bringing along, had gotten himself into some kind of trouble… at least that was the rumor. Something about attacking some common orphan child.

Hreth cared little for the man’s fate in that case, so long as it did not redound onto him. Thankfully, he had made the man shift for his own accommodations. An early peek at the Indenture Prospectus was valuable, but Belen was a dangerous and unpredictable man, particularly when it came to his orphans.

“No slip ups. If that Oddsman reappears, he is unwelcome. I can live with his guild’s disappointment.” He growled at his three man escort. He was still surly at Belen’s inconsistent application of the tradition. All of the ladies were accompanied by a full guard of six, while he was limited to his three, as were the other male barons who did not owe him direct fealty.

Even that upstart Emma, a viscount’s daughter, she was not even the heir to her seat, yet her six were even given lodgings at some inn, near the commons.

His manservant had been rebuffed quite rudely, when he inquired after rooms and some companionship at that same place.

The narrative has been illicitly obtained; should you discover it on Amazon, report the violation.

Even worse, the damn Holloman brothers were suctioned, lamprey tight to Belen’s rump, making even that distasteful option unavailable. Kissing the backside of a jumped up orphan ‘duke’, no matter how prosperous or talented, was beneath his dignity anyway.

At least Timarch, the younger Holloman was forced to dwell among the mud and peasants with him, that provided a little leverage.

The baron’s pavilion was behind his, having been erected late. The baron Holloman had been unceremoniously invited to encamp with his peers, after his pathetic attempt to set up a secret indenture auction…

The fool wanted to shift one or two of his substandard indentures off to the Toy Collector and thought to raise her offer with his ill considered gambit.

His broodings were disturbed by his manservant, Kenrik at the inner flap of his ‘quarters’.

“Baron Timarch has arrived, my lord.”

A moment later, the bedraggled lord came sulking in, draped in a heated towel. Kenrik was an expert at his craft and worth every coin he had paid for him.

Timarch shuddered and wrapped the warm towel around himself. “Your man makes these conditions almost civilized. My body man is in medical quarantine. Apparently he contracted some exotic complaint on our journey.”

Timarch did look rough, his escort, by contrast was in fine condition. Leyroy was in a brightly patterned hooded cloak that seemed to shed the rain like a duck’s rump. His gear had none of the waterlogged and unpleasant smell that lingered in all the tents now. The pervasive scent of crushed grass and wet soil was everywhere, save that man.

Timarch noticed Flavius’ gaze and huffed angrily.

“I am in the unenviable position of lodging in quarters inferior to my troops’ billets. What I wouldn’t give for a hard, narrow bunk under a real roof, with a dry floor.” He grumbled. “My troop is quartered on the Adventure compound… The orphanage remains closed to non members under any circumstance.”

Leroy shifted awkwardly in his corner of the tent, as Hreth’s guard, Frank caught his eye with a pleading glance from across their lords’ conversation. Leyroy nodded subtly and received a brotherly nod of thanks, it was going to get crowded in the roundhouse by the baths.

“We could trade complaints about the conditions in this backwater all evening Timarch… I’ve called you here, so that you can dry off and we can discuss what comes next.” Flavius murmured. “Is your man reliable?”

“Highly. He will reliably report any impropriety or shenanigans to my brother, or Order. He is doughty, but inflexible.” Timargh said firmly. “Is that not correct Leroy?”

“My lord is ever perceptive. You own my contract, my honor remains my own.” The small warrior said, just as firmly.

“That is excellent.” Flavuis said with some excitement. “I find a few excellent men far outperform a squadron of malleable fools who will follow any order…” He raised an eyebrow at his companion. “I find such men are also prone to following their own darker whims, as well.”

“Must you bring up such distasteful matters? I offered generous compensation to the girl’s parents… still they demanded his head.” He frowned angrily. “The whole affair was a waste and an embarrassment.”

“That rake Mindenhall, he sold you a mad dog when it became too dangerous for him to handle. He walked away, while you still labor under that stain. The gods alone know what that grasping weasel covered up, before you bought that animal…” Baron Hreth spat in fury.

“I shudder to think… War and the Orphans’ League, at least know how to deal with such creatures.” Timarch mumbled. “I thought I was buying a warrior with a checkered past, not a… I’ll never buy second hand again!”

“That is the crux of my argument… I know you find the idea distasteful, but consider the compromise that has been under discussion…” Flavis said firmly.

“That we ban private indenture sales and trading, reform our orphanages under Belen’s guidance and send all orphans not taken into a lord’s guard, off to War…” Timarch said, with a sour look on his face. “My own recent misadventure aside, this is too radical and sudden…”

“Belen has prospered under these conditions for generations. Now they offer us these methods and some of this gear. If we no longer need bid against merchants and speculators…” He ground his teeth in fury at the thought.

“Now we must compete with them and their deep pockets for the best… Then, we must hire them, for the work that is a lord’s duty, not the idle pursuit of some jumped up, grasping tradesman. With this reform, we will be that much closer to parity with the great powers.” Flavuis leaned in closer, speaking urgently.

“Think, you get a taste of what Belen has and bask in his aegis. How much better to wield these powers yourself? Men loyal to you and indentured to War, not mercenaries at the behest of merchant ‘lords’ and dilettantes.” He hissed.

“In a decade we could have the kind of autonomy Belen and Sheng enjoy… perhaps even a measure of their prosperity as well.”

“You make a compelling case… but orphans have ever been loyal only to their guild… Belen enjoys his special status through an accident of birth and fortune.” Timarch complained, while both guards, a manservant and a baron all looked at the young nobleman in mild disbelief...

“That is a failure of leadership, Timarch… that is the other matter I wish to discuss with you. How many Indentures have you bought, sold and traded this year? Seven?” Flavius asked with a dire look.

“Nine, why does that matter?” He demanded in utter confusion.

“Think about that for a moment, Timarch. I see Kenrick has brought the tea.” He turned to his guard in the corner with a nod. “Frank, how long have You known me?” He asked the armored young man.

“Since I was ten, my lord.” He replied evenly.

“Who gave you your first lesson in the spear and your first real weapon, Frank?” Flavius asked mildly, while pouring tea for the baron and himself.

“I received both from your hand, my lord.” He answered.

“Who holds your loyalties, my friend?” The baron of Land's End asked.

“The Orphans’ League, my gods, and yourself, my lord. In that order.” He answered, without hesitation.

“I find that more than satisfactory.” Baron Hreth muttered quietly, as he passed his guard a teacup and poured for Leroy.

“Belen is a jumped up commoner… for which I am profoundly grateful. A nobleman would be smart enough to maintain his stranglehold on these secrets. Belen is a clever man, not a smart one, as he will be first to admit, this is an opportunity, not a crisis.” He fixed his eyes on his younger peer.

“I have been asked to speak to you on this, by Otho of Joy and Naiomi of Healer, do you realize how extraordinary that is?”

“They are Belen’s tools… of course they wish to interfere in my affairs. Belen has been hounding my dear brother about how I manage my domain for years now. He thinks to tell me, the legitimate scion of a true noble house, how to run my own lands!”

“An innocent child…” Flavius looked grimly at the young lord for a long moment, before he continued. “...and under your own roof, by a man in your livery. One good warrior slain, another maimed and two more injured, in your own barracks, putting that creature down. I too, have… concerns.”

He let that linger, as the tea cooled, for a few dozen heartbeats. “You have work to do. If you ask, I will send one of my veterans to help with training up your troop, Belen would do the same.”

“I never thought to see you performing the necessary indignities for duke Belen. He does relish having his ass kissed by new participants.” Timarch complained. “I am required to pucker up and abase myself, you have chosen this path.”

“Gods, it’s like you have your head stuffed with sand… That man would rather be shoving a lance up the festering backside of a crawling horror from beyond, than endure a tiresome conference.” Flavuis grumbled.

“If I could surround my lands with such men, I would sleep easier at night. Consider that he enjoys campaigning and sleeping in a tent. I would rather have my balls shaved by a trembling barber with cold hands.”

“He’s not even an orphaned noble… he’s as common as mud!” Timarch yelped.

“Yes, he is…” Flavius replied mildly. “Leroy, are you the romantically tragic scion of some lost noble house, like in a fable?”

“No, baron Hreth, I’m as common as mud.” Leroy answered confidently.

“You let this man be your shield and sword… He does his duty to you. Belen does his duty to his realm… as your lawful liege. Find a way to reconcile yourself, house Belen will be around long after you and I are gone.”

“House Belen… I wouldn’t have a dog with Belen’s pedigree.” Holloman grumbled.

“Gods, man… Belen’s ‘pedigree’ can be seen in those children of his and in results.” Flavius grumbled right back. “Commoner or no, he’s presiding over the first expansion of human lands in a dozen generations or more. I don’t want to marry his family to mine, but I’d kiss him for pushing the fringe back sixty miles from my door.”

Hreth sipped his tea and smiled at the young lord. “I like you Timarch… I think we can help each other, consider my words tonight, My man Kenrick has been attending to your quarters while we spoke. A warm, dry, night’s sleep might show you a clearer morning. Good evening Timarch.”

“What do you think, lord Flavius?” Frank asked when the nobleman and his guard had left.

“He is a fool’s fool, but not a coward or stupid… I think he will come around. It will take a jolt to the system though.” He sighed tiredly. “Run along, I know you all wish to decamp to the orphanage. Kenrick is enough of a guard for me.”

“Yes my lord, in that case, goodnight.” Frank ducked out into the vestibule, to put on a still sodden cloak and venture to his barracks tent.

A few soggy minutes later, Frank was dripping onto the flattened, reeking, wet grass in the tent. “We have an invitation for the night, dry beds, perhaps even a shower.”

The frisson of excitement that ran through his small team was enough of an answer.

“Gather your gear, we head for the Adventure compound in a half hour. Kenrick has the duty this evening, I’ll relieve him at midnight.”

#

“I hear duchess Sheng bought Terry as well, sight unseen.” Chad whispered.

“Good for him, I wish she’d buy me.” Annalie said, in her unusual, warm, sing-song, coastal accent. “I’ve three and a half years left…” She shuddered in dread. “Mindenhall wanted to buy me, I think the baron was considering it.”

The small, tight knit crew had grim expressions on their faces when the Land's End team walked in, staring around in interest.

“A hillfolk roundhouse and forge?” Frank wondered aloud. “Odd to find this here.”

Chad and Travis smiled smugly, while Annalie chuckled with dark pleasure. “Fresh guests, come to stay in journeyman Shai’s house of comfy mysteries? You must be Frank, Bates and Killian. Leroy said you would come by.”

She stood and stretched her lanky frame happily, fingering the faint pink scars at her throat.

“The bath first, I think. Be sure to hang your things on the gear racks in the changing room. You will hate yourselves in the morning if you don’t” She led them out into an awning-covered, hot spring garden bath and enjoyed blowing their minds.

Leroy joined Frank and the small troop for dinner, prepared by a small blonde girl and her giant boyfriend. Two veteran team leaders watched the pair work together in the kitchen with nostalgic, bittersweet smiles.

“Remember Toban and Kittridge?” Frank asked.

“Yeah, I was best man at their secret betrothal… we were so young. Kittridge was sold to a merchant from Hovarth, I heard he died last year. Toban lasted a week after he found out. Ran right off a cliff with a smile on his face.”

“Oh… I’m sorry, brother. I hadn’t heard.”

They continued watching in sadly comfortable silence.

#

When Kenrick arrived shortly after midnight, Travis grinned and led him on the tour the others had received earlier, while his companions watched with unconcealed glee, following along and giggling at each gasp of wonder and confusion that was drawn from their eldest companion.

“Hey… my gear is all clean and dry…” Killian cried in some alarm, while searching his pockets for his pipe.

The others rushed to their kit, racked on the strange gear stands that stood all around the bathing and changing room. They were all clean and dry, even warm and pleasantly scented. “Ok, that is a little creepy…” Bates whispered, while Kenrick evaluated the job with an expert’s critical eye.

“There is some magic in this…” The warrior valet muttered quietly.

“Don’t be silly. No one has laundry gifts… what gods and spirits would you even Contract for that?” Killian muttered quietly, lest they offend their hosts.

“Craft, Light, Water, Earth, Fire and Wind.” Kenrick answered smoothly. “I met a butler from Montmarril, once. He had laundry and hospitality gifts, a strange guy. He taught me some tricks too...” The man said softly.

“Nothing like this though.”

“We will be going to visit Orlando tomorrow, come along, you can meet our hosts.” Travis said with a smile. “Those kids are nuts.”

“I thought that was the little blonde and the big one?” Frank muttered.

“I have no idea!” Travis laughed. “I can’t make any sense of them, beyond that Orlando has been staying in their stable and has never been happier...”

#

Gary was in the stables, at second bell, teaching the kids how to groom the horses… They had fun brushing their legs anyway. Orlando was hanging out in the hayloft, legs dangling over Annie’s stall, with a giddy smile on his face.

“Duchess Sheng says she will put me to work on her horse farm…” He remarked idly to the young people working and playing below. “Now I have a debt that can never be repaid…”

“Forget it bro, a friend asked me to take care of you. Since she takes care of me all the time, we’re even… Right Annie?” The massive horse chuffed through her nose at the boy and bumped him with her head.

“Oh hush, you know I’d do anything for you.” He headbutted the massive horse right back, rubbing his forehead between her eyes.

“Becky’s calling us… lessons time!” Rio sang excitedly, while trying to dust the hay and straw off himself.

“Go rinse off and change, kids. I’ll tell Becky you’ll be a few minutes late… A few minutes.” He said firmly to Wilford as they all trooped across the yard, to the house.

Rio and Amy pulled a mostly dressed Wilf in for lessons just a few minutes late; he was still resisting pants from time to time. They settled in their corner of the taproom and started working at their letters and numbers, while counting down the time til music lessons.

Shai sat across a table from Cameron, chatting fondly like old friends. “… I had a mite of a crush on thee, an a powerful jealousy against Tammi, fer her gaining thy eye… ye were always kind in the face of me girlish antics, thank ye fer that.”

“Really, I never noticed your attention…” He lied feebly. “You were barely more than a child, as was I…”

Gary coughed suggestively behind them, just to watch the pair jump in their seats. “Moving in on my girl Cameron?” He asked with a cheeky grin, while wrapping his arms around her from behind.

“Fie, we talk of childhood days an times gone by. Jealous rake, ye are my only love.” She growled that last bit in his ear, just for him.

“So you grew up in Wheatford?” Gary asked, sitting down nearby with a big mug of coffee.

“I fell for a girl… An orphan from Port Sill, I was mad for her and duke Belen allowed me to trade masters. The cost was an extra year on my indenture for my new master, lord Flizitz of Port Sill.” He said slowly, still unused to speaking after more than three years under his former curse.

After a sip of tea and a cookie, he resumed his quiet story. “I liked Port Sill, and Flizitz was a good and capable lord, then the landsquid job came in.”

He smiled bitterly. “My whole life flipped upside down that day. Linda, she was amazing, but I had to let her go and break things off, I couldn’t shackle her to a cripple.” He trailed off with a sad smile.

“Flizitz sold me to duchess Sheng when my condition persisted. He didn’t have the resources to keep a crippled man, certainly not one dependent on a costly and intoxicating medicine, just to function.” He sighed sadly. “The rest, you know.”

“We have a lot in common bro, besides catching my lady’s wandering eye…” She dug an elbow into his ribs for that one, but he was asking for it.

“Life never moves in straight lines, it’s easy to get lost or bogged down. You can start over again, buddy.”

“I begin to believe that…” He whispered with a faraway look.

#