Ch: 100 Second Hand Belfry
“What do you mean, ‘there’s an extra baby’? Speak sense man.” Sarah grumbled as she shook off the fog of too many miles and too little sleep.
“All the villagers agree, no infants were taken, just the little ones and adolescents… they don’t know whose baby he is.” Ali grumbled, deeply upset. “Donal and Allyson rode to all the villages within a few miles, no missing kids reported.”
Sarah started struggling back into uniform, cursing under her breath. “Did Jonah figure out what that thing was doing with the kids?”
“He says it was a summoning of some kind, the children’s fear and pain was being used to draw something here. This was unlike what we were briefed on, he is back at the scene, investigating with Kurt.”
“Ok, new orders. Ali, you and a volunteer will take the supply wagon and return to the capitol with the child.” He opened his mouth to protest and got cut off.
“Duke’s orders, any stray children go to Otho at the orphanage immediately. If there’s a ducal officer involved, the soldier that finds any such kid goes with. no delays, no excuses. Sorry, the corpse goes with you, also orders.”
She shrugged helplessly. “Above my pay grade, enjoy your trip. You leave in an hour, with my reports.”
#
Luna and Khan took great joy in having an Iron rank duckling, too much joy. They spent the evening and into the night, toying with their experimental subject.
“He processes so much mana with every breath, it’s tough to find the problems. Mostly seems to be on the left side… meridians and mana channels are all tangled and fucked.” Luna had her eye patch off, looking at the boy through enchanted goggles.
Smoked glass lenses in circular brass frames, with leather straps and cups around the eyepieces made her look slightly ridiculous, but she wasn’t vomiting or slipping into hallucinations.
The boy was hung upside down from a ceiling beam in the workshop, while Khan swung him back and forth like a pendulum. “Add some spins to him, lover, really shake him up.” Luna sighed happily.
“Remember old Budhal Kumar? He had you on that wheel of fortune for what, a day and a half before you got your heart chakra open…”
“Luna, you are a genius…” Khan burbled happily, kissing right under her goggles.
“Mmm, that ‘stache…” She murmured in pleasure. “Why am I a genius this time?”
Instead of answering, he turned on the boy in his ‘frighty wighties’, swaying on a rope wearing nothing but snug, briefs bearing an image of a white cartoon ghost on the crotch, telling the viewer; ‘You’re My BOoOo!’, very droll.
“Boy, where is that mad machine that they strapped poor departed Brennan into?”
“Muhh? Wha…?” He gasped, through a flushed and confused face hole. “The gyro-pope? It’s packed away…”
“Cut him down Luna, we’ll play with him some more tomorrow.” He swatted Gary on his doofy, upside down face. “Bathe and go to bed. We travel tomorrow and we work on this in the evening. We are looking forward to it.”
He crawled into bed and blacked out while still trying to figure out how blankets worked.
#
“Not you guys too…” He moaned in the garden. The NotGarys were doing yoga, meditating, practicing routines taken from martial arts films and otherwise being complete assholes.
Even Dj NotGary was involved, hanging from gravity boots, while spinning his wheels of steel, blindfolded in the booth. Only Velvet was doing his job, faithfully watching the gate.
The musician ignored his stupid selves and their dumb jokes, while he went to go meet with himself at the gate.
“Any sign of Gritsch, or whatever her name is?” He asked as he took the bouncer’s clipboard for review.
“You too bro? Haiku?” Gary flipped page after page of pretty bad poetry. “What’s going on here guy?”
“What’s going on here, you primitive ape…” Marduk snapped from behind him. “…is you, finally starting to put yourself back together.”
The tiny god shook his blonde curls and sighed. “If you work hard, stay focused and stop trying to kill yourself, you might just manage to survive. Unless you would rather become cosmic dust and pleasant aroma this week…”
“Now now, Ducky,” Thirp cooed. “He is doing much better, because of, not despite, all these shades and shadows. A little haunting is normal and healthy under these circumstances. Frankly, I quite like them.”
Freddy Mercury’s mouth and mustache shot Gary’s crooked, mad smile from the kitchen window and laughed musically.
He’s just a poor boy, from a poor family!
The spirit sang at Marduk, before he ducked back inside with a cheeky wink.
“Ok guys, is all this really helping? Or are they just fucking with me?” Gary demanded, sweeping his arms wide to encompass all the variations of himself doing… things, all around.
“Each of these is a part of you, working on different facets of what is all broken in you, which is to say, most of you. Shut up and quit bitching.” Thirp scolded him.
“You need to get your house in order and this is progress! Sweet webs of our ancestors, you almost dissolved a number of times since I moved in here.” She paused, tinkling a thoughtful melody on her voice.
“You are a terrible influence on me Gary, but my point stands. You have children and a mate to look after.”
While she finished chewing him out, Gary snuck a peek at the crock under his inexplicable insect hive. A good several ounces of thick, rich honey coated the bottom of the vessel, he took a taste and shuddered with pleasure.
“Oh that’s wild… Have Shai and the kids tried this?” He asked, bouncing on his toes in an unexpected sugar rush that lingered very pleasantly.
“Good gods no, that stuff is not safe for them… for you… probably not either… in the long run. That only matters if you have a long run, boy.” Marduk said sharply.
“Only someone touched by death and dissolution in the most intimate ways can survive the sugar wasp’s sting and only one stung by the wasps may approach the hive, even here.”
Thirp shook her many eyed head sadly. “You are in the way here, off to natural sleep for you.” She whacked him with one leg, sending him tumbling into the warm, comfy abyss of dreamless sleep.
#
Gary woke later than usual, only an hour before everyone else and hungry. He stumbled to the garden for a couple pieces of fruit to keep him going till breakfast. Shadows flitted about the edges of his vision, peeking out as if to check on him from time to time.
He grabbed a few big, plump figs and a grenadier before heading in to start the coffee. While he worked on the sacred ritual of beans and water at the stove, a soft fluttering sound made him turn around.
One of the figs on the counter was a shrunken, withered husk of its former, juicy glory. He touched it and got that same message, compost.
“Come out, you can’t hide from me… anymore.”
#
Tazz handed the tiny boy over to Ali, as he prepared to set out, while Bakker drove the wagon up, with a teamster’s steady skill. Ali nearly staggered under the unexpected weight. He unwrapped the bundle, expecting some joke or prank from the salty scout.
What he found was the same dark skinned baby boy, with the same snug cap of tight black curls. The very one he pulled from the undead mostrositie’s grasp, just the evening before. The infant had doubled in size overnight becoming a plump, sleepy toddler. Now he seemed to be around a year and a half old and ready to begin bumbling about.
“I told you, he put on some weight. I can’t explain it and I won’t bother trying. He hasn't woken, eaten or… anything yet. Enjoy your trip.” She vanished, leaving him holding the sleeping child and wondering if he was losing his mind.
“Let’s go,” Bakker called softly. “Jonah’s preservation spells will help, but that thing was rotten before he got them sealed. Every minute we delay is another minute it will reek.”
Ali handed up the babe and climbed aboard, nestling the child on his lap. With a smile, he produced his pot of ritual unguent, rose and mint with essential sacred spices. He dabbed a bit under his nose and the child’s. Ali reached out and booped the teamster turned soldier on the nose leaving a pleasant scented residue.
This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.
“Ahh, thanks. This is going to be a long two days.”
#
As usual, Shai found Gary in the workshop, though instead of the usual scents of wood and wax, pitch, varnish and glue, the chamber smelt of hot flesh and scorched bone.
His small buzzing tool was making a softer sound, as he carved bone with a fast spinning, burr of steel. His slow, sweet whistle rang out over the sound of his tool, as he spun his gifts and intent, into spellcraft.
“I dinnae like the sound of yer song lad, tis sadly happy. What dae ye craft so intently?” Shai asked, kicking on the magical ventilation fans.
“It’s ‘Lament For The Fisherman’s Wife’, just an old song…”
He continued for a few bars, inscribing just a few more of his tiny marks and lines. “Deathwhistle.” He mumbled, while buffing his creation with hot beeswax and the oils from his own face, rubbed on a cloth.
“An Aztec deathwhistle, in pierced shell, spider eye and monster bone, enchanted to order. I’m having trouble communicating with someone and this is the key I think.”
A small spiral of iridescent, pearly shell, pierced with finger holes and capped with two thin hemispheres of crystal clear glass and an amber colored bone mouthpiece was the whole of the thing. Barely a small handful, the enchanted instrument was hardly dramatic or awe inspiring.
He handed her the tiny thing and its details with a happy smile. Shai sighed and took a closer look at the unprepossessing thing.
It displayed the intricate chambering of the coiled shell center and Gary’s delicate openwork, in the interior walls, but only to the player. She peered close, enjoying the magnifying effect of the hemispherical cover.
“That dome is part of the queen spider’s eye… strong and perfectly clear, I only got two of those.” He mumbled happily. “It’s a slice of Lillith’s shell and the mouthpiece is wallowbear bone.”
A tiny world swam into view, scratched in pictograms and tiny figures on the inner walls of the shell. It depicted two figures, a dog man and a feathered serpent on some kind of journey. The pair voyaged through a miniature realm of jungles, deserts and pyramidal cities, collecting the bones of the dead. They were pursued at every step by a dancing, bloody skeleton.
Xolotl’s Wind Jewel, Flute/whistle/unknown, rank/incomplete, enchanted/incomplete; spirits/shades/ghosts/fractional souls within range hear and comprehend wielder’s intent and communication.
Quetzalcoatl’s song; incomplete/null/null.
“What means this? Tis a work of deep craft an strange lore I dinnae ken… lovely though, I must say.” She glared at him as she passed it back.
“What dae ye need speak wi ghosts fer? Ye already hae too many that do listen tae ye.”
“If I’m going to be a psychopomp, I’m gonna be there for everybody, even if they don’t… or didn’t, have ears to hear.” He stretched, cracked his neck and tucked the strange device up to his lips.
Sweet, sour, bitter, salty, industrial, melodic noise came tumbling from the tiny whistle. It was soft, louder than a whisper, but filled the workshop to the rafters with spine tingling and exciting sound. It was beautifully dreadful, while being sweetly terrifying. It faded to a soft animal scream before dying away.
“Sweet gods an spirits above an below… I dinnae ever want tae not hear that ever again… now play it again, play once more.” She said, forcefully and confused at once.
“Yeah, it rattles the senses and amplifies spiritual resonance… Lilith had a gestural language and the ability to sense sound… otherwise we might have fought with her. That would have been super shitty.”
Gary started up the stairs, following Shai. “Now I should be able to talk to Gotham, poor little guy is so scared.”
She stopped, trapping him on the landing. “Who be ‘Gotham’...?” She asked, with elaborate patience, crafted with great care and much practice.
“I… we picked up a fruit bat vampire ghost in the grotto… I guess he liked us and felt welcome after I fed him. He sorta slipped in.” He held up his palms placatingly and tried to charm her with a smile, but that failed.
“He’s harmless, lost and scared. He also can’t hear mortal sounds, they operate on magical echolocation, it’s fascinating…” The poor boy was lost again, so Shai flicked him between the eyes once.
“Oow! Big meanie… now I’m glad I made Ivy the Master Blaster special. Serves Tallum right for having a bully for a sister.” He complained cheerfully.
“I was discussing some ideas for communicating with non hearing, or even less sentient entities with Ivy and it came up naturally… ‘Thunderdome’ is going to come up a lot, I think…”
The door slid open at the top of the stairs as Becky headed down.
“Guys… we have a… guest? Up here… they say you called.” She paused at the top of the stairs, in her full kit and had a hand on her sword hilt. It was hard to tell behind the cowl, but she looked nervous. Spooky, but nervous.
The trio slipped upstairs and out into the common room, where a small crowd was gathering around a figure enjoying a leisurely breakfast.
“Uhh… guys, I think we need to have this discussion in private. Our guest is… double haunted, for that ghostly spectral flavor?”
#
Over by the fire, Becky, Shai and the kids were tucked into the couch, while Gary sat across from the strange visitor. He wore complex robes with an elaborate headdress and golden eye covering that did nothing to disguise his canine features.
Equally obvious was his entirely unnatural aura of predatory and keen alertness. The boy reached out and swiped his guest’s plate and coffee with a grateful sigh.
“I haven’t eaten yet… you don’t mind do you, since you ain't really here.” He said with his mouth full of potatoes. “What’s your name and how did you sneak in?”
“Xolotl is the name, cheeky monkey. You are the new kid in the business I guess? You really should meet with your coworkers, before you start shuttling souls about.” He manifested a brightly painted clay skull shaped cup of cocoa in his skeletal paw and sipped with pleasure.
“You haven't stepped on my tail… yet. But you called me, rather suddenly too. I do like that proper cocoa is beginning to appear again, thank you for that.”
“Ok, that’s… cool, I’m Gary… how did you get in?” He asked again.
“You. Called. Me. In the only way I can be called into this world. By a mortal with the knowledge and in the presence of a suitable shade.” He snacked on an imaginary churro, while sipping from his cup, leaving a dollop of whipped cream on the tip of his nose. Becky, Amy and Wilford giggled at the spirit, while Shai considered exorcism options… internally.
“A vampire fruit bat… odd haunt for a mortal… Her name is Xyll and she likes ‘living’ here very much.” Xolo said mildly, while pretending that the snootfull of whipped cream was not there and also, not intentional.
“I see you Xolo. Recognized.” Gary nodded at a fellow enthusiast in the craft. “Trying to communicate with… Xyll, was why I got on the deathwhistle project in the first place.”
“Very well, I will take no offense… Clearly you did not intend to summon me… let me see your jewel please.” He yipped a short chuckle.
Gary grinned and placed it on the table for the spirit to examine.
“Ahh yes, I see. Once you finish it, you will be able to control the range and frequencies. Right now it just blasts everyone and everything around with spectral harmonics.”
He slipped from his chair and strolled over to a dim corner by the fireplace.
“Put a ring of salt around you before you test that again.” Xolo stepped into the shadow of a bookcase and vanished with a faint fluttering sound.
“Busy morning…” Gary remarked, while munching on wallowbear bacon. “We should get moving…”
#
“Now children, what is all this?” Otho demanded, as he strode into the secret garden. A group of his younger teens started guiltily and tried to pretend to be tending the plants. Solange was less easily intimidated.
“Theatre is a dying art… fortunately some of us remember those days long forgotten. Shakespeare in the park, under my spreading boughs… mostly Motzart and the Boston Pops as well, but theatre is a unique mortal wonder.” She strode up and down the clear patch in the corner, where the children had not been gardening.
“That young whelp of yours has a wealth of knowledge inside him. I had Becky mine a jewel from his depths before they left, now we learn the craft and prepare.”
“Noble elder... Sweet perfume of the summer, lady Magnolia, Solange… that failed to answer my query.” Otho said humbly, while giggling under his breath. Even with the boy away, his presence lingered here, along with the gaze of Joy.
“Gilbert and Sulivan, old man. Comic opera is going to return to the lands of men!” She crowed, as her tree, in the center of the garden shivered with excitement. “When that boy returns…” Her laughter brought a flock of starlings and hummingbirds swooping into her branches.
#
A long morning’s ride down the gentle incline felt surreal. The fog didn’t drift, or crawl on the desert road. The fog strode up, kissed each of them, right on the lips and tried to snuggle into their clothes. Breathing felt heavy and almost like drowning, just a little.
The sun rose fully over the mountains and turned the gray, misty fog into a solid wall of fluffy white clouds.
It was a little unnerving, riding into a white shining void and trusting that there was more road ahead. Annie and Khan took the lead, since they were well aware that there was a few miles of long, straight and even desert road ahead.
Dannyl, Herlick, Bannock and the three kids had been keeping their heads together a lot over the last few days. They rode in a knot around the cart with Shai in the driver’s seat and socks carrying Nara. She purred happily in the warmth enchanted cloak Gary draped over her as they set out.
“You make travel almost civilized, Foolish one. I may allow your hearth to warm me for a while longer yet.” She mewed happily, as he cranked his stick horse down the road.
“Thanks, I aim to please.” He shot her an exasperated glare, just for the fun of confusing her. Poor dear had no Idea what human expression’s meant.
The strange quiet of a ride in heavy fog pressed in, as Gary conversed quietly with Khan, Shai and Tawny.
“...‘cause it’s incomplete, it rattled him out of… where ever. He possessed my new… pet? Xyll the fruit bat, to manifest a glamor body for a chat. I’ll finish it tomorrow and it’ll be good.” He said with a smile.
“Nice to know that there are other gods hanging around too. I’m looking to trade Morrigan out before long… She’s high maintenance. Now Quetzalcoatl…” Shai shot him a nasty look just as the sun started breaking up the fog.
A brilliant ray landed on her, high on the driver’s bench, making her even more radiant in her disapproval. “Dinnae vex gods an spirits boy. She hae depths tae her yet methinks.”
They rode in silence a while, as the clouds and fog burned off and the lush valley below unfolded. On a river bend and surrounded by farms, orchards and looking onto an estuary, a tidy city stood.
Circled by water, it had no walls, only a few bridges and a wide wetland of paddy farms and delta waterways. Birds flocked thickly at the water’s edge even at this distance they could be seen, flying and diving. Boats and ships bobbed at rest in the waterways, while tiny craft punted about.
“Beautiful…” Shai whispered, looking out on the vista.
“We’ll be in the outskirts of town by late afternoon… the duke’s actual investigators should be somewhere in town already.” Herlick reminded them as they watched the town roll out before them.
“Our job is to be obvious and entertaining, our status as Adventurers will open few doors in the higher quarters… We have diplomatic status, of a limited sort… as the duke of Wheatford’s ‘official’ representatives.” Khan looked right at Gary when he continued.
“We will make an amusing spectacle, rattle some windows and doors… and ingratiate ourselves in the commons.”
“A distraction that does not embarrass Wheatford, yet leaves them wondering… Do you think we can manage that?” Tawny was looking his way too, so was Shai… He hopped off his bike and vanished it away.
“What, Me?” He asked, while plucking his banjo from up his sleeve. He began flicking his fingers over the instrument, rattling the morning fog out of the rider’s heads.
“How about an early lunch someplace just outside town. We do a little nonsense, play some tricks and let rumor and supposition carry our water?” He asked happily as he climbed up beside Shai on the cart bench.
“I think the market ward of Port Clement is ready… if we dress the part.”
#
Goodwife Maisie Knubbel snipped a perfect rosebud from her prized twining hedge. She tucked it behind her ear after flicking the thorns away and smiled at the two strangers approaching her garden gate.
“Good evening mistress, we are come to discuss a short term lease, perhaps a day or three.”
The handsome mustachioed man said, while a small figure in elaborate and mysterious robes stood behind him.
“We are a traveling band of Adventurers and would prefer to camp near town while seeking longer term accommodations.” He made a bronze half mark dance across his knuckles as he smiled.
“My companions are currently up the road, considering a roadside pasture for our needs.” He made a copper half slip from between his fingers and back into his fist.
“Silly man, you will wake with wet backsides and soggy bedding. There’s a spring under that meadow, it’s good for naught but grazing goats and producing the region’s finest mosquitos.” She said sadly.
“See widow Glennis up the road, two houses. She has a lovely little hillock overlooking the town...”
“Nonetheless, your meadow is what suits our needs. Will you let us use it, full knowing that it’s damp?” The robed figure’s voice was a child’s, sweet and well educated.
“Your ladyship could simply assume it, we will not contest your right…” She took a curtsey, directed at Becky. “Though certainly a noble lady could…”
Her escort raised a hand with a smile. “We are simple Adventurers. We pay our way and will leave your meadow at least as good as we found it. Are we agreed?” He pressed the two coins on her gently.
The mysterious duo mounted a pair of very fine animals and rode away, leaving a very confused woman holding a fair bit of coin.
“Who was that love?” Abel Knubbel asked, strolling over, from the back garden.
“Oh, a rose behind your right ear? Trying to tempt me?” Her husband wrapped his strong arms around her from behind, rubbing her swollen belly fondly.
She swatted him away with a giggle and pressed two coins into his hand instead. “Go see master Hires about that stud goat. A band of young idiots just rented your soggy bottomland for the week…”
“See if mistress Yoshida still has some pickled radishes! Your son makes me crave those damn things!” She shouted at his retreating form.
#