Book Six: Finding Trust

"So, do you think this time will be any better?" Emily asks.

"Mmm, that's hard..." I think about it for a bit. "Well, I want it to go better, but I have no idea how she feels." All I can do is sigh.

"What are you talking about?" Helen asks from behind me. She wanted to try something new with my hair today, so Emily is watching her work while we talk.

I just sigh again. They already know about Reena, so I'm not worried about telling them. "Reena was really mad at me last week. She told me to do something and I failed. I don't know if she's still going to be mad at me this week or not."

"That's, uhh..." she doesn't seem to know how to answer and goes quiet.

"It's really weird you know, knowing someone who actually talks with the gods," Mary comments, though she still sounds half asleep.

"Pretty much," Helen agrees. So that's why she didn't really respond, I realize. It really is weird, isn't it?

"Sorry for being weird," I apologize, but keep myself still instead of bowing.

"Hehe, it's fine." Eve jumps into the conversation. "Keeps things interesting. What did she want you to do? Anything cool?"

"Ahh, not really," I keep looking at the far wall so I don't mess up Helen's work as I answer. "Sorry, but I can't really talk about exactly what it was. But it was really hard and I wasn't able to do it." It makes me wonder, where did I go wrong exactly? As far as I can tell, it must have been when I tried to stop that rail unit from attacking Effy from behind. That was the only thing I did that could be considered aggressive, like attacking. A single mistake was enough to fail...

"Huh..." Eve replies vaguely.

"I wonder if she'll be less angry this week?" I wonder again, weakly.

"Well... at least Miss Beth should be happy," Emily volunteers, obviously trying to cheer me up. "You're finally all healed, right?"

"Yeah," I smile a little. "That reminds me, I'm also supposed to talk to Claire after church." I consider that for a handful of moments before jumping with shock. Helen complains, telling me to stop moving, but my heart is already starting to thump loudly in my chest. "I'm supposed to meet Claire today!" I gasp. "S-sorry, Helen, could you take my hair down again? I have to wash it."

"You do?" She asks, obviously having no idea what I'm talking about.

"U-uh, umm," I stammer, trying to explain, before my words come out in a rush, all running together. "I'm supposed to meet my instructor who's this lady from church today but she's way higher class so I have to at least try to clean myself up beforehand or I have no idea what she'll think of me!"

"Woah woah, slow down, Aria. Something about a what?" Helen asks. It does feel like she's starting to take my hair down though. I try to slow down, explaining how I have an instructor now, and how I'm supposed to meet her today after church to talk about my upcoming classes.

"Ahhhh..." All of the girls release the same sort of pained sigh once they've heard my brief story.

"Will it really be alright? Even if you clean yourself up a little..." Helen trails off, not needing to say 'you're still a peasant' for everyone to understand.

"I know, but I need to at least try," I weakly answer. "I don't know how much time I have before my doctor visit, so I have to do this fast."

"What do you need?" Emily asks immediately.

"Uhh, let's see." I only need to think for a few moments. I'm supposed to use soap and hot water to wash, but I can't heat the water outside, or people might see. So I should probably do it in here, but I would get the floor wet. I don't have a bathtub like rich people use... How about one of those round wood ones people use for washing clothes? "Emily, can you draw a bucket of water from the well?" I ask.

"Sure." Without another word, she leaves the room.

I turn back to Helen and ask, "Do we have any of those big clothing washing tubs?"

"I'm not sure, let's check the storeroom." I nod, and we both head out too. We search around, finding one pretty quickly since it's big and easy to see, even in the dark storeroom. I try to carry it back, but it's larger than I am, so Helen winds up taking it from me as we climb the stairs.

When we return, Emily's already back with a bucket full of water. She works so fast! "So, what are we doing?" she asks, looking at the big tub Helen's holding.

"Well, Irene told me I'm supposed to wash myself with soap and hot water," I explain while digging the soap out from under my bed and showing it to her. In the meantime, Helen manages to set the tub down, though there isn't much space, so the edge pokes under my bed.

"And the..." but Emily stops, glancing meaningfully to the other girls. Her gaze says everything. 'You're going to show them?'

"Uhh..." I think I kind of skipped over that part in my haste.

It's Jannette, of all people who asks, "Where are you going to get hot water?"

"Uhh..." I stammer even louder as I realize the problem. How do I explain this? Everyone looks over at the bucket of well water Emily is holding. Obviously, there should be a lot more work needed to heat up water like that. I bite my lip, tensing up before finally just hanging my head and sighing.

This is the best excuse I can come up with. "I figured out a way to do it by studying metals." I glance around at the girls, who have looks ranging from skeptical to concerned. "It's sort of a secret, so can you maybe not tell anyone about it? I'll, uhh, let you use some?" I try offering.

"Hmm, interesting offer." Eve is the first to respond, with a playful grin. The other girls slowly nod, except Jannette, who still just looks skeptical. I guess that will have to be good enough for now, I tell myself. Then I go over to my bed and grab the ignium. Emily sets the bucket down next to the tub and I drop the ingot inside.

I glance around and the other girls are watching with obvious interest. I can't make the process too obvious, can I? Well, there's nothing they can see anyway, so... Nervously, I reach down into the bucket, holding my hand near the ingot and pushing. I get a tiny trickle of fire mana since I'm using the mollite in my wrist, but mostly the ingot just heats up. I slowly begin to feel the heat spreading through the water, but it's taking some time, so I use my hand to stir, like Eryk did, to get the heat all mixed throughout. To them, it must just look like I'm stirring a bucket of water.

"Uhh..." Eve sounds really concerned. "You know ignium doesn't work like that, right?" It sounds like she's trying to break it to me gently, since... well, normally this wouldn't work at all...

"Umm..." I have no idea how to respond to her concern though. The water is already somewhat warm, but it needs a little more. I only need a little longer, then I'll have to stop before it's too hot, since I don't want to leave the ingot in the water. Hot water is supposed to be bad for metal, and it needs to cool down enough for me to touch by then.

Finally, I manage to squeeze out a vague response of, "It'll be fine, there's more too it than just... stirring." I offer lamely, which just makes Eve more concerned. But the water's basically hot already, so I cut the flow of mana, giving the water a few more stirs before hesitantly touching the hot metal ingot. It still seems very hot, but not quite enough to burn me, so I quickly remove it and toss it into a bundle of bandages to dry it off. All in all, the process of heating the water only took about five ticks. I didn't know what to expect, but that was pretty fast.

"..." The silence is stunning as the girls all stare at the bucket of water, the haze of heat and steam from the surface slight, but clearly visible. So this is the steam Irene talked about when you boil water, I realize. It looks just like the water at the rail unit baths...

"No way," Eve mutters.

"How?" Jannette is blinking rapidly, like she can't believe her eyes.

"Sorry, it's a secret," I immediately apologize. "Please don't mention this to anyone?"

She shakes herself. "When you said you have certain skills, you were serious."

"Yeah," I give a very slight nod. While the rest of the girls look on in awe, I try to push forward. I don't know how much time I have. I pull off my clothes and bandages. I take a few long moments to look down at myself. All of the cuts, scrapes, burns, and broken bones from the battle have finally healed. My skin looks perfectly fine, just like it's supposed to. Even if I'm still pretty pale compared to everyone else. I'm glad that I won't need to keep wearing bandages all the time. Then I shake myself, this isn't the time to be thinking about that.

I sit in the tub and Emily tosses me some cloth, which I use to get myself wet, like Irene told me to. Then I rub myself all over with the soap to make it easier to get the dirt off of me, especially after everything in the forest yesterday. I try to work quickly, wiping down with the wet cloth after that, to wipe away the soap and dirt. A little water collects in the bottom of the tub as I wring out the cloth. It seems like this should work. Once I'm done, we can just dump the water out the window.

As soon as I finish with my skin, I work on my incredibly long hair. I've started to get used to it falling to my shoulder blades since it's usually all tied up, but with it down now, it fills most of the tub I'm sitting in.

I can't say I do the greatest job in all of this, with so much hair, and rushing like I am so I'm nowhere near as thorough as Irene taught me, but the soap really helps pull the dirt off of me quickly. I wet and wring out my hair a few times, and it seems like I've gotten it to a somewhat light gray color again, so it isn't all that dirty, and I can get my fingers through it pretty easily. It reminds me of the hairbrush I wasn't able to buy though, before I push away those thoughts.

Once I'm finished, I stand up and dry myself off. Unfortunately, I only have my clothes to use, and they're already dirty, so I wind up undoing a some of the work I just put in to get myself clean. But I still think I'm better off than before. I step out of the tub, a little bit of water in the bottom now, and put on my other clothes, the ones I just bought the other day. They're just about as dirty as the ones I was already wearing, but there isn't anything I can do for that now.

"Can I?" Eve asks clearly looking at the bucket of hot water.

"S-sure, of course!" I stammer, stepping away so she can use it too. I did already offer to let them use it after all.

"Here, I'll do your hair again," Helen says, already running her fingers through my hair with a big grin.

"S-sure..." I reply to her the same way. After that, Helen works on my hair while the other girls take the opportunity to bathe themselves. They each grab their own cloth for washing themselves off. After the first two, I have to reheat the water in the bucket since it's started to cool off, but then Helen finishes up with my hair. Surprisingly, even Jannette takes a turn, once everyone else has gone, so I heat the remaining water for her. Somehow, I'm not that surprised when I see she has soap too.

"Ahh, hot water..." Jannette suddenly says, sounding happier than I've ever heard her before. We all look over, amazed to see her standing there, eyes closed with a strangely gentle smile on her face, she slowly pours the last of the bucket of water over herself, before stepping out of the tub and drying herself off. We all look at each other, no idea how to respond to Jannette's strange behavior.

While we're all still too confused to respond, there's a knock on our door. It's about halfway between the first and second bell, so it should be John. Everyone is standing around. It seems my rushed bathing experiment led to everyone getting up much earlier than we normally do.

"U-uh, hold on!" Eve calls through the door, finger jabbing toward the tub of hot water on our floor. There's no way we can explain that! Emily quickly grabs it and picks it up. She has to tilt it a little to get it past the edge of my bed, so I grab the bucket and dive under my bed to catch the splash of water that spills out. Then we dump both out the window as fast as we can, before passing them off and rushing back to the door.

Mary is already opening it in front of us. "Hi," she greets John stiffly.

"Good morning," he says. "Is everything alright?" I can see his eyes scan across the room. We're all clean and have wet hair, and Eve is frozen, halfway through shoving the large wooden tub under Jannette's bed, with Jannette vaguely moving like she was trying to stop her. "Never mind." Without another word, he turns around and begins walking, so we follow him out. I quickly spin around, trying to say 'please put everything back' with my eyes before chasing John into the hall.

We make it a dozen steps down the hall before I realize John already knows about mana.

.

.

.

We all walk into Mister Fredricson's office as usual, but this time, he gives me a long, penetrating stare as John explains that we're going to my doctor visit. What is it? Does he have an issue with me going to the doctor? Doesn't Eryk pay for the doctor? Why does he keep staring at me? My hair isn't dripping is it? But I don't think he's looking at my hair this time, is he? I feel like a ball of nerves by the time we return to the hall.

Once we reach the street outside, John picks me up, while I start to ask if I look weird.

"Well, your hair looks wet, and it's tied up strangely, but besides that, no more than usual," is his response.

"My hair is tied up strangely?" I ask, looking over at Emily while she jogs beside John, and she just shrugs. I try to touch the back of it to tell what's weird, but immediately realize that Mister Fredricson wouldn't have been able to see the back of my head anyway. But really, what's weird about it? I can't tell just trying to touch it. I mean, it kind of feels like it's tied into three different ponytails or something...

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"Then why was he staring at me like that?" I continue to wonder aloud.

"Want my best guess?" John asks.

"Yeah," I answer immediately.

In response, he just points to the different looking skin on his cheek. "See this? I got cut here protecting a traveler one time." I stare at the odd spot of skin. It looks kind of weird and bumpy. I try running a finger over it, and it feels sort of rough and bumpy too.

"What is it?" I ask.

"A scar. Normally, bad injuries leave scars like this." He doesn't even need to say anything beyond that as I fill in the rest on my own.

"I... don't scar?" I ask quietly.

"It's... you know," Emily says. For once, I don't understand exactly what she means, until she lifts the edge of her sleeve a little so I can see a spot on the side of her arm. "Where the monster got me," she says shortly. That would have been one of those bad stab wounds that I treated with earth mana. This is no mark on her clear skin where apparently, there should have been a scar.

"Oh," I realize aloud. Wounds healed by using lots of mana don't scar. But then what about all of my injuries from sparring with other rail units? I guess I was unconsciously using my mana for that too, even before I learned to control it properly. "So that means..."

"It means he just realized that no matter what injuries you receive, they won't leave any marks. Probably not good, considering his reputation."

"What does that mean?" I ask. What about Mister Fredricson's reputation?

"Ahh, just something I heard." I can see John glance away awkwardly. "Something about him selling kids to some... let's just say, less reputable types."

"Less reputable?" I mumble quietly, taking a moment to figure out the word. I'm still not sure whether or not him trying to sell me would work out that well, but I guess as long as he isn't trying to claim me as his property since that would be against the law... "Wait, but what about the other times?" I suddenly realize aloud.

"Other times?" When John asks, I think for a few long moments. I... don't think John has heard much of the specifics of my other injuries. I vaguely remember him being there when I told Eryk about the mollite in my arms from being stabbed, but have I told him about the monster attack? I don't think I have, as far as I can recall.

"I think you might have heard a bit about me being kidnapped, and attacked by a monster," I explain. "I was injured both times, especially on my arm here." I point out my right forearm, that suffered the worst of both attacks. "I got stabbed with a knife during the kidnapping, and bitten during the monster attack. Both injuries healed without scarring. Mister Fredricson saw both of those, didn't he? Shouldn't he have already noticed back then?"

"Uhh..." Emily can only shrug.

"It's hard to say. Maybe he already knew, or he suspected and this just confirmed it," John proposes. "Either way, he definitely knows that you don't scar now. Which could theoretically be a bad thing for you in the future. He might start looking into selling you to... some bad people." Mmmm, that's difficult. If something like that does happen, would I be able to stay with someone who beat me? Depending on how bad they are, it would be like being back with the rail units, wouldn't it...?

I shudder at the thought. Would it be better to stay with a person who beats me, or go back to the rail unit program? Either one would be horrible... I glance Emily's way, but she's staring a hole in the ground and biting her lip. Is she... that worried?

"W-well, I guess I can think about that more if it comes up," I immediately try to change topics. It's no good worrying about this now anyway, I tell myself. Not when Emily looks like that. "For now, I'll just be glad I know why he was staring at me." Him staring for some unknown reason would be much more worrying...

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It doesn't take much longer before we reach Matthew's bar. As usual, everyone meets up here before we head to the doctor's. "Good morning, Matthew," Emily greets him energetically as we walk in the door. I'm glad she's bounced back after earlier.

"Good morning, Emily," he calls back. While we wait, she goes over and sells him yesterday's hobins. Right, she picked them up after I went to sleep. It takes a moment to recall, even though Maven handed them off just like always. But that thought brings me back to last night. Her telling me that I actually have good points.

It must be because I've always hated myself for being weak that I couldn't see them. Does this mean I shouldn't hate myself? I'm still weak and broken, that hasn't changed at all. Does having good points balance that out? I don't really know. I'll have to keep thinking about it...

While I'm frowning to myself, I notice John looking down at me intently. "Huh?" I blink up at him a few times, only now realizing that he hasn't bothered to put me down yet. I immediately start wiggling anxiously, and he releases me a few moments later. Bouncing lightly on my feet as I land. I can never tell what John's thinking. Quickly turning away, I address Matthew. "Hi Matthew. Thank you for taking care of Emily all the time," I immediately thank him with a deep bow.

"Aria!" Emily starts blushing furiously for some reason, while Matthew suddenly starts choking like he's holding back laughter. Did I say something wrong? When I glance back up, even John is holding his hand over his mouth like he's about the start laughing. "What did I say?" I wonder quietly.

It takes a while before everyone calms down, and I slide over near Emily, asking her. "That's sounds like the kind of thing a mother would say to her kid's new boss..." she complains quietly.

"Ahh..." I mumble, already remembering what Emily told me about her past. "Sorry," I apologize.

"It's fine, you obviously wouldn't know something like that." She's still pouting a little though.

We wait for the others, John bringing out my breakfast in the meantime. I'm still worried about the amount of food, but as always, I manage to eat it all without trouble. It's only a little longer before Eryk and Francis arrive, nearly at the same time. With a short round of greetings, we all head out. John picks me up again, while Emily runs along, easily keeping pace with the adults. John warns Eryk and Francis that Mister Fredricson knows I don't scar now, to 'keep everyone on the same page.' I don't really get the expression, but I guess it has to do with everyone knowing what's going on. It does seem to make Eryk worried though. More than John, I wonder why? I also mention to Francis that I took care of the issue he asked me about, speaking vaguely since Eryk and John are here. They look interested, but don't ask since I'm clearly trying to be secretive. We reach the clinic a little while later, after the second bell without much else in the way of conversation.

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"Hello Eryk, hello Aria," Beth greets us as we walk into her office. "Hello Emily," she adds on when she enters behind us as usual. Then her attention is back on me as Eryk approaches the table in the middle of the room. "I see you're looking a lot better. You took off your bandages already?"

"Umm, yeah," I answer kind of nervously. "I needed to wash myself today, so I took them off."

"Ahh, I see," is all she says in response while he sets me down on the table. I'm a little relieved, she doesn't sound angry. "I'm going to check you again, is that alright?" She asks, so I nod. I'm a little worried about trying to take my own clothes off after she stopped me the other time, so I just let her undress me again. This time, she only needs to look me over briefly, since all of my injuries are clearly gone. She does double check the burns on my arm from where I got struck by lightning at work, but they're gone too. "Good girl, you're looking all better. Miraculously, not a single scar, just like you said," she comments the last bit to Emily. She told Beth I don't scar? When did that happen? Despite my question, the doctor moves on.

"I want to check your recovery, can you stand up?"

"Sure," I say easily. I've been walking around no problem for a while now, and I've pretty much recovered my stamina too. Still, she seems rather nervous, so I slide off of the table slowly. I stand in front of her while she has me do a few seemingly random things. Touching my toes, lifting my arms over my head, turning side to side. I guess she's just checking whether I can move everything right?

"Ok, everything looks fine here. Now, I'd like to check your height and weight again," she says while helping me put my clothes back on.

"Again?" I blink a few times at the strange request.

"That's right, you were still unconscious the first time we took your measurements," Beth says. "I just want to make sure you're at a healthy weight and growing properly," she assures me.

"Alright," I nod again.

"Ok, just stand still a moment," She instructs while grabbing a little round thing from one of her cabinets. When she starts to unroll it, I realize it's a tape measure, like the ones Marrianne and Selena measured me with. Despite another pang of sadness, I smile a little. She holds it up next to me. "One hundred five centimeters. That's three more than a month ago." When she rubs my head, I close my eyes happily. "Looks like you're growing nicely. You'll be bigger before you know it." I don't really have anything to compare that to, but just nod and take her word for it. "Now for weight. Step over here please?" Beth draws me forward lightly, toward the odd tilted thing in the corner of her office. When I tilt my head at it, she explains, "This is a scale, it's for measuring weight."

"Hmm..." I stare at it for a few moments. It just looks like two connected platforms with a metal bar in the middle. I wonder how it works...?

"Come on, just step on," Beth says, a note of laughter in her voice. I do as she says, stepping onto the platform that sits on the floor. She takes an object off of the counter and sets it on the connected platform up in the air. Strangely, nothing seems to happen. I wonder why? Looking at the rather large metal block she just set down, it looks like the number ten is written on it in black. She then puts a second, smaller metal object on top of the first one. It's marked with a five. This time, I feel the platform I'm standing on jolt, and shift my weight slightly. Then, just a tiny bit at a time, the platform I'm standing on begins to lift upward. I'm totally confused for a few moments. How does this work?

I look over at the objects. They're on a platform connected to this one, which is slowly sinking toward the floor. Before I can put too much more thought into it, the doctor starts talking again. "Ah, fifteen kilos. That's a much better weight than last time," Beth notes. "It's still very light, even for your size, so you should keep eating a lot of healthy food to get to a more healthy weight." Something about the way she says 'eat a lot' makes me jump a little, the platform jolting under me as the other side reaches the floor. It makes a bit of a banging noise, and draws Beth's notice. "Is something wrong?" She asks immediately.

"No, well, umm, uhh... Maybe..." I look away. When did food become such a sensitive subject?

"It's fine," Beth says soothingly as she lifts me from the platform. She sits me on the edge of the table again, standing close and rubbing my head. "Whatever it is, you can tell me." She speaks softly.

"Well, I've been worrying that I'm eating too much..." I admit, my whole face hot.

"Aww, you're growing," she chuckles a bit. "Of course you should eat more. It's perfectly fine." Really? I smile a bit, before Eryk taps her on the shoulder.

"I want to ask about something," he says quietly, pulling her away a bit. Then he leans close to whisper in her ear. Unfortunately, I still have the water mana from yesterday, so I can hear him anyway. "Aria's been eating enough food for four people. I've been getting a bit worried actually."

"Eh?" I've been eating that much? They both look up at my squeak. As soon as she sees my face, Beth rushes over.

"No no no, sweetie. It's fine," she says, holding my face gently between her hands so I'll look at her. "Even if you've been eating a lot more than normal, you haven't gained a lot of weight," she begins to explain. "That must mean your body is using all of that energy. The doctor says you have nothing to worry about," she says with strange confidence.

"Really?" I ask quietly. I don't understand exactly how it works, so I don't know. Does it actually work that way or is she just lying to comfort me? Either way, she wipes away the small tears from the corners of my eyes. "You're clearly a very special little girl." As soon as she says that, I frown. I know I've been called special a few times before, and I know she means it as a good thing. But for me, being 'special' has always been bad... "Aria?" Of course, now she looks even more concerned at my response, so I have to tell her something...

"Sorry, it's just that being different has always been a bad thing," I admit. "Thank you for saying I'm special, but..." It's hard, I can't make myself tell her that I don't like being told that... Beth doesn't say anything for a while, eyebrows drawing together like she's thinking deeply about something.

"It's different now," she finally says. I don't understand, what's different now? Then she explains. "Being different in the past was a bad thing, right? Well, now things are different. You can feel good about just being yourself." She says it so confidently, but that's not true at all. I'm still so weak, and useless. Why would I feel good about that? After the battle, I can see clearly that I don't stand a chance against rail units at all. But of course she doesn't know about any of that, so I don't say anything.

Beth raises an eyebrow and opens her mouth a little, like she's going to say something else, but then stops for some reason. After a few moments, she speaks again, to Eryk this time. "Aria's body has healed, but given what I've heard, I'd recommend some counseling. I think it would help."

Eryk looks confused for a moment. Why? He waves Beth over and they start to talk quietly, but of course, I can still hear them...

"What is counseling?" Eryk asks. He doesn't know already?

"It's a medical technique to resolve issues like trauma by talking about them." Beth whispers back.

"Does that work?"

"It should, I think." Why does Beth sound uncertain? "Aria clearly has a lot she still needs to work through. From what I've read, counseling can help with that."

"I suppose she does... So, is this a recommendation, or...?"

"I'll do it," Beth replies. "I don't have any experience, but she would probably have a lot of trouble opening up to a new person right now, so I think it's for the best." I... don't know if I understand what they're talking about.

"Umm, what does 'counseling' mean?" I ask, wondering if she'll explain it in a way I can understand this time.

Beth turns back to me from their whispered conversation and leans down to the edge of the table. "It's just talking about things. Anything you want to talk about, anything worrying you. Eventually, maybe you could tell me about your past and the things that have happened to you if you feel comfortable with it. I told you before, telling other people about things like that can help a lot, instead of keeping it all bottled up inside."

"Mmm..." I mumble anxiously. I can't talk about any of that though... Besides, how does that make counseling any different than just talking?

"No need to worry," Beth coos. "We can talk as much or as little as you're comfortable with." That sounds a little reassuring... I think.

"So, should I bring her back next week?" Eryk asks.

"No, she can come alone. This should be one on one."

"But, what about the payment?" He blinks a few times, obviously surprised.

"It's fine." Beth waves off his concern. "I'm sure you'll find a way to pay me back at some point." After her first comment, her lips turn up into a playful grin. "Besides, this is for her, but if you'd like to pay..." He immediately backs up a step, raising his hands in defeat.

"I'll stay out of it," he responds stiffly. But while they're talking about that, I open my mouth nervously.

"I-I'm sorry, but I don't have enough money..." I apologize.

"No no," Beth stammers, spinning back to me, "you don't have to pay. I was just poking fun at Eryk. It doesn't cost anything," she assures me.

"But..." Why wouldn't it cost anything? She normally charges a lot when when people come here, right?

"Really, don't worry about it." Beth rubs my head gently again as she speaks. I'm still not sure...

"So I guess that's everything?" Eryk asks. "Should we just keep the food situation the same for now?"

"Yes. I'll admit that I don't understand the cause, but if Aria is eating that much food without gaining weight, it must be important for her body. I'd advise you continue feeding her as you have been."

I look down a little as she speaks to him. There isn't something else wrong with my body now, is there? I never ate so much food before. In fact, I hardly ate anything, just a few small meals a day. The most I ever ate was during my few weeks at Marrianne's house, but even that was nothing like it has been lately.

While I'm still worrying, they nod to each other, and everyone begins shuffling as they move to leave.

I glance over at Emily, she didn't say a single word today, just standing over in the corner near the door. Well, I guess there wasn't anything for her to say. Then Beth draws my attention again, speaking to me in a quiet, soothing voice once more. "I would like you to come back again next Shanaday at the same time. You don't have to," she adds quickly, "so no pressure. I just think talking through things could really help you."

"I, umm..." I mumble.

"No need to answer now, just think about it," she says with a small smile. "I hope to see you again next week." I still can't think of anything to say, even as she gives me one last pat on the head, draws me down off the table, and nudges me back toward the door.

On the way out, Eryk says, "Thanks, Beth, see you later."

Emily follows him with, "Have a nice day."

I'm still fighting with my thoughts on her last suggestion, but I force those to the back of my mind long enough to bow deeply and give her the most sincere thanks I can. "Miss Beth, thank you very much for helping me this past month."

Beth just giggles. "You're very welcome." Then we head back out the door to meet up with everyone else in the front room again.