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The Emperor's Concubine
What Could Have Been I: The New Emperor (8)

What Could Have Been I: The New Emperor (8)

Cedar was rarely nervous, but he had to admit that he was anxious at this point. A few weeks had passed ever since he had started to invite Lucille to the palace more often, and now he finally couldn't delay it any longer. He had to formally introduce Lucille as his fiancée in public. Before doing that, he had to ensure that his mother wouldn't snap, which meant that she had to approve of his decision before.

Naturally, Camille would never like someone he intended to marry. Cedar didn't delude himself into thinking that they could get along either.

But still, he at least hoped for cold politeness and distance as he spoke up. “I have to introduce an important person to you, Mother. This is Lucille Valerian.” He turned to glance at his fiancée.

Lucille looked like he had dragged her onto the battlefield. She could barely keep herself from trembling and only stayed close to him because she fought the urge to hide behind him already. Even as she only met the dowager empress' gaze, she seemed to shrink in herself. That gave away how grim the atmosphere would be already. It wasn't surprising, but it was still dejecting.

A single glance at his mother already revealed how upset she was about all of this. She didn't even try to act nice. She looked at Lucille like she was watching a piece of meat that didn't mean anything to her, but she couldn't hide her anger fully either. Her voice was so cold that it seemed to freeze the entire room. “Good day, Lady Valerian.”

The greeting was curt, but it was all Lucille needed. She quickly grabbed her dress with her shaky hands and curtsied deeply. “Good day, Your Majesty. It is an incomparable honor to be welcomed by you.” She was trying so hard to show her respect. Of course, it wasn't enough.

Camille still viewed her as an obstacle and nothing else. “Good. It seems like you are aware of our difference in status. That we are even speaking to you shows our generosity.”

Cedar would usually stay out of it to keep his mother from getting more upset, but he could already see it going downhill. If Lucille was supposed to marry him, he at least had to shield her a bit. “Mother, please do not greet her so harshly. Lucille is a very respectful person, so she would never disregard your rank.” It was obvious that he would have to call Lucille by her first name, but it seemed like this had been a mistake.

Camille's eyes narrowed just slightly, but that already gave away that she hated seeing Cedar so close to someone else. She stayed quiet for long enough to reveal what she really thought before her gaze landed on Lucille. As expected, she wasn't kind. “What do you wish to gain here?” Her voice seemed to fill the entire room as it suffocated those around her.

Lucille couldn't deal with pressure, so she shrank in herself even more. When she finally replied, her soft voice said enough about all of this. “Par...don? What do you mean, Your Majesty? I-” She couldn't even reveal her confusion.

Camille already glared at her. “Do not act dumb around me, Lady Valerian. Cedar has no reason to search for someone like you, so it is natural that you must have addressed him first. Did you approach him because of his rank?” Her son had told her that he planned to use Lucille for his political games. Shouldn't she understand that this had been his idea too?

Cedar opened his mouth to chime in, but he didn't get that far.

His mother already lifted her hand to silence him, still without looking at him. “No excuses. I know a power-hungry wench when I see one. But if she at least knows her place and won't believe that she can truly join the royal family despite her lacking background, we can still use her. Though, bringing someone so imperfect and clumsy into the public will only ruin your reputation.” She scanned Lucille while openly showing so much disdain that it was almost surprising how readily she gave this away. As the other woman cowered under her gaze, her words only became harsher. “Acting innocent won't help her. She will need to learn a lot if you wish to be empress. I shall teach her myself to get this arrogance out of her.” She wanted permission to terrorize Lucille while pretending to be her teacher.

Naturally, Cedar would not agree to that. He was aware that rejecting the help of the previous empress was difficult for a new woman in this field, but in their case, it didn't matter. Lucille wouldn't enter politics either, and Cedar would teach her everything else. He would never send that poor girl into Camille's hands.

Though, saying that so directly would create a tantrum of no bounds.

So, Cedar tried to be diplomatic. A soft smile formed on his lips. “I sincerely thank you for the generous offer, Mother. But you have so much to do already. I do not wish to overwork you. Is this truly necessary?” Slowly, he stepped to Lucille. He gently put his hands on her shoulders to snap her out of her trance while speaking to her in a tone his mother hopefully read as a display of fake and almost threatening kindness. “Mother offered you something wonderful. She could certainly help you a lot if she taught you about our nation. But...I wonder whether this is what you need. Lucille, do you even want to be involved in politics? You said that you weren't interested and that you disliked responsibility. As the empress, you could naturally work with me, but that might be too difficult. You sounded like you were unwilling before.”

Even Lucille heard that he spoke much differently in front of his mother. She didn't seem to like it when he used that far too sweet voice that he would usually use while manipulating people. Still, she went with what Cedar had asked of her before. “I...do not wish to get involved.”

This wasn't enough for Camille. Of course, she still tried to find a way to insult Lucille. “That is better for our nation. But even if she becomes a trophy empress, she has to appear in public. She still needs an etiquette teacher.” Camille didn't even speak to Lucille directly anymore. She was truly fuming.

Cedar just worried about the future. If Camille caused so many problems already, he doubted that things could go well for much longer. He tried to ignore that and beamed at his mother though. “Lucille will only appear during the most important events. During that time, I shall keep an eye on her.” He squeezed Lucille's shoulders gently. This caused that poor woman to become even more unwell. That was good since it made it seem like she feared Cedar. Then Camille might see her as less of a threat.

But Cedar didn't dare hope. As they went through the rest of tea time, Camille just seemed to ask questions meant to intimidate Lucille. It was obvious that she was flaunting her power. Needless to say, Cedar couldn't do much about that, but he tried to give Lucille some security. He mentally noted to apologize to her after this, but he first needed to speak to his mother in private. He felt a bit bad about sending Lucille out like this, but then again, he did this for her.

As Lucille agreed and rushed to the door, she seemed rather relieved to get out too.

Cedar waited for her to close the door before he showed his mother a bright smile. “What do you think?” He thought the worst already.

Camille wasn't pleased, as expected. Her expression was cold as she replied. “As I said, I despise her. I think that she has ulterior motives and just wants your crown.” She was so hateful despite not even knowing Lucille properly. That was typically her. But Cedar was used to it already, so he just listened as his mother kept talking about Lucille like she didn't deserve her own humanity. “I know that you need an empress, but I can't trust that a whore like that is the best choice. What if she tries to seduce you?”

Lucille was supposed to seduce someone? Lucille Valerian, who got red as soon as you maintained eye contact for more than a second?

Cedar didn't see the reason why his mother worried so much. Even if he fell for his own wife, which certainly wouldn't happen since he wasn't able to form real human connections, why would that be an issue? It would only be helpful for all of them. But of course, he didn't say that. “Do you truly think that foolish little girl could influence me? I am the one controlling this, Mother. Not the other way around.” He acted even more confident than usual, just to get his mother to react.

Camille gritted her teeth and just stared at him for a moment. It seemed like she was quite annoyed with what he had said. At least for a few seconds. Then she forced herself to calm down a bit and spoke again. “You are right to some extent. She is truly completely in your hands. If you keep your power far away from her, you could use her as a marionette.” He couldn't expect more of an agreement.

Hurriedly, Cedar underlined the only helpful impression of what this relationship meant. “Of course. You didn't truly believe that I would give that foolish woman power over anything here? Why would I do that?”

His mother didn't seem to trust him fully. She stared at him for a bit too long and stayed quiet after.

Cedar knew that this meant that she was unhappy about this. He couldn't discuss it with her for longer though. “Let us speak about this in more detail later. For now, I will send Lady Valerian home so that we can take our time.”

Camille's gaze only became colder. “Do that. I look forward to you coming back quickly though.” He almost hoped that it would be over with this, but of course, that didn't happen. Camille scanned him far too carefully before she spread her arms. “Cedar, give your mother a hug for a moment.” She wanted him to reaffirm that he loved her now.

Cedar truly didn't feel like the moment was fitting, but if he hesitated now, she might try to blame Lucille for it immediately. So, he slowly walked toward his mother. As she expected it of him, he leaned down so that she could reach him despite staying seated.

As usual, Camille didn't hold back. She hugged him tightly while resting her hand on the back of his head. She slowly stroked over his hair, something she only did when she wished to lull her son into a false sense of security to ensure that he wouldn't refuse to listen to her. Then she whispered. “You know that I love you more than anyone else in this world could, right? I am just so worried about you. I can't let my dear son run right into danger.” Even when she might be the biggest threat in this nation now.

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Cedar knew that he couldn't say that, so he merely let his mother hug him while he slowly lifted his arms to rest them on her back as well. “Of course, I know what your intentions are, Mother. I am very thankful for your concern. Rest assured that I will not let anyone harm me.”

Camille didn't seem to believe it. She grasped her son's head by cupping his cheeks and pushing him back just enough to make eye contact. As she gently brushed her thumb over the side of her face, she showed him such a soft expression. “I worry about you being consumed by the plots of some awful people that want to harm you. Promise me that you will be careful.”

She acted too kind. That was an issue.

Cedar expected the worst at that point, but like usual, he only smiled at her. “I promise.”

It took a while longer until Cedar could finally exit the room after his mother warned him a hundred times. He almost expected Lucille to have left at that point, but she was still there, waiting in the corridor.

Cedar had to admit that he felt a bit bad. Both for letting her wait and for not being able to defend her in front of Camille. So, he showed her a little smile. “I sincerely apologize for letting you wait for so long. Mother wished to discuss this a bit more.” He paused and scanned Lucille from head to toe. As expected, the young woman was quite unsettled. Anyone would be after meeting the dowager empress. Cedar felt even more guilty. “Are you fine?”

Lucille still fiddled with her hands and didn't meet his gaze, but she replied. “Yes. It was... nerve-wracking, but it's fine now.” She paused and lowered her head even more before she spoke. “Your mother has quite the presence. You have it too. That makes me wonder whether I even...” She worried about being suitable for this position again.

Why was she so focused on that? It wasn't like she had picked this position. Cedar had pushed it onto her to use her like a tool. She shouldn't need to concern herself with any of this.

Cedar made sure to give her a warm smile as he reached for Lucille's arm to escort her. “As I said, you are perfect for this role. Do not worry about anything. I will take care of all of our issues.” But even as he said that, he couldn't deny that it was a bit unfitting for him to act like a savior.

When Lucille looked at him like he was someone that would protect her, it just reminded him that he was the very opposite. He was the villain of this story. He didn't deserve the trust of anyone.

Yet, it was good that he received Lucille's. Like this, he could keep her safe no matter his role. Because even if he was the villain, she didn't deserve to be hurt because of that.

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The engagement ceremony was short and quite simple. It could have gone by easily if Camille hadn't troubled them so much. After not offering Lucille any gifts and just giving expensive things to Cedar while hugging him repeatedly and asking him to escort her, she had successfully irritated even the most understanding nobles.

Even Cedar had been upset with her. He had told his mother that he didn't care about Lucille, but he had also told her that he wished to have an amicable relationship with his fiancée. Apparently, Camille had ignored all of that and had just seen this day as an opportunity to trouble Lucille.

Admittedly, Cedar hadn't dealt with it as well as he could have. He should just have played along to calm down his mother, but he had rejected the request to escort her and had even told his mother to stop criticizing Lucille's etiquette because his fiancée had almost started to cry at that point already. As a result, Camille had snapped at him and had threatened Lucille once again while promising to crush any ‘power-hungry vixen that thought she could seduce the emperor by acting innocent’. Cedar hadn't found that very funny, and he already worried whether his mother would get revenge later in some way.

It was no surprise that he massaged his forehead as soon as Lucille and he stepped away from the ballroom and entered a small seating room to speak in private. Cedar would have asked Lucille to meet him in the emperor's room to be more secretive, but his mother would have killed both of them if she had heard that Cedar took some woman in there. So, they had to make do with this.

As always during bad days, Cedar beamed so brightly that the corners of his lips began to hurt. He couldn't focus on his own annoyance though. Lucille had been the one to be truly troubled by all of this. He should calm her first. “I sincerely apologize for this. I wished that things would be better at least for a day.”

Lucille, who had been dressed up rather fancily in a beautiful gown in the royal colors, didn't have any confidence despite just having been announced as the second most powerful woman in the capital. She still fiddled with her fingers while standing there like she felt out of place. “You...don't have to apologize. It's not your fault. In fact, you did a lot to protect me. Thank you very much.” That was only logical when he was the one that had brought her into this position.

At this point, Cedar felt even more horrible about forcing Lucille into this than before, but he couldn't back out anymore. “I promised that I would do my best to keep you safe, didn't I? Though, I fear that my mother took this personally. If she troubles you during the next few days, please have someone inform me quickly.” He prayed that nothing would happen, but he couldn't quite ensure that his wish came true. No matter what he did, he was still trapped in a difficult situation.

Lucille nodded quickly, seemingly being eager to receive his protection. “That would be nice. Thank you.” But even she could tell that the issues were bigger than this.

Well, Cedar had warned her often enough. He was glad that she had understood. But even this wouldn't keep Camille from trying dangerous things. So, Cedar had to ensure that Lucille had something that could keep her safe. Neither option was perfect, but he went with what he assumed to work best. “We shall hold the wedding in a few months if you are fine with that. I wished to wait a bit longer, but if you have a slightly higher rank, it may be harder for my mother to begin fights with you.”

Again, it didn't seem like Lucille questioned him. She just agreed to what he had suggested. “Then...we can do that.”

“Good. I shall prepare everything in time.” Cedar might not be able to grant Lucille the dream wedding with a loving man, which she had probably hoped for in the past, but he could at least make it appropriate for the future empress. He would have to ensure that Camille wouldn't trouble them though. As he took his crown off to place it on the table next to him, he heard a small voice behind him and was torn out of his thoughts.

Lucille had seemingly followed him and stood right behind him. “Ah, Cedar...” She looked so uncertain again but clearly wanted something.

If she had any wishes, Cedar would quickly fulfill them to make up for the awful situation she was in. “Yes?”

Lucille continued to play with her fingers, seemingly not being aware that the skin next to her fingernails was already reddened. “As your future wife, it...would be important for me to know which groups are our allies and which are our enemies. I have a general overview, but... I am quite uncertain about politics. Are there any people I should look out for?” Oh. She thought that far already. That was good.

Cedar had planned to inform Lucille of this later, but he needed to make this clear as much as he could. If he didn't want her to run into danger, he would have to remind her where the biggest threat was. “You are correct.” He leaned against the table and crossed his arms as he began speaking. “I already warned you about my mother. She is without a doubt the most troublesome person in this nation at the moment. Like I said, she is hysteric and puts herself first in all regards. She is also...unhealthily attached to me and becomes explosive if she just sees me interacting with a woman. This means that she will trouble us often in the future. I am trying to control her a bit, but that upsets her too. And when she lashes out, that often ends with her sending assassins. So, we have to be careful.”

Upon hearing that, Lucille had gotten a bit paler already. She had known that Camille was dangerous, but now her fiancé's mother only scared her more.

Cedar felt bad once again, but he decided to continue so that Lucille wouldn't be blindsided if a threat from another angle hit them. “Duke Vasquez is a threat too. A big one. I'd say he is the second most dangerous person after Mother.”

That just made Lucille even more worried. “But isn't he your uncle? He...was in your faction for a long time too.”

“It is more accurate to say that he pretends to be in my faction. Duchess Vasquez and her son truly support me. But Duke Vasquez has bigger goals. I am quite sure that he will attempt to assassinate me soon.” Cedar had suspected it for a while now, and after Theodore's death, the duke had changed his behavior drastically, which had proven him correct. Duke Vasquez didn't want anything good for his nephew. Cedar was sure of that.

Lucille's forehead became covered with small wrinkles as she held her hand to her mouth. “What? How can he...”

Cedar's family seemed to be good at threatening their relatives. With his mother and uncle acting like that, it was no surprise that Cedar had ended up killing his brother, who had gone insane after falsely executing his lover. Seemingly, his whole family was just cursed. That was why it was about time to end this heir-line. Which was why Cedar wouldn't have children himself but would adopt someone later. He hoped that he could keep this messed up past from that child in the future.

But Cedar obviously didn't say that. He just continued. “I am unsure of the reasons and do not have any proof aside from some cases in which he acted without orders and troubled many people. But my instinct tells me that Duke Vasquez is more dangerous than we think, and I was never wrong about something like this. Please trust me.”

Lucille hurried to nod just a moment later. “Of course! I will keep that in mind. Is there anyone else?”

Cedar had many people on his list. He doubted that Lucille could memorize them though. “If you wish for it, we can go through a detailed list of what I think about all people in the capital. For now, I will just tell you to avoid Lady Peril, Marquess Peril's ex-wife. She isn't a deadly threat, but she is good at extorting others with her weaknesses and desperately wished to use me to gain power.” Aside from her, he could only think of one other family that troubled him. “The Duremont family will not be a threat for much longer.”

The mention of that made Lucille freeze. It seemed like she knew just how much the new emperor despised that family. She didn't seem like she dared to ask about that part either.

It was no surprise.

The eldest daughter of the Duremont household had been the one to frame Blanche for treason, which she would be punished for by execution soon. Her older brother, who had been arrested alongside her, had helped her and needed to face the consequences too. Cedar wasn't done with his punishment just yet though. He still had many ideas. Everyone in the capital knew that he held a grudge, so no one would dare to intervene.

Seconds passed in silence.

Cedar almost thought that Lucille would end the conversation now. After all, she might be scared of the consequences for the Duremonts too.

But it seemed like this shy woman ended up speaking despite that. “May I ask a question? I...feel like the topic might upset you though.” She looked up at him with so little confidence. She looked like a baby deer that was about to faint.

Cedar didn't feel like he had to be on guard here. “You are my fiancée now, are you not? You are free to ask whatever you want. Whether I will respond is my choice.” He had many things he couldn't share, so he would keep those hidden. When it came to less troublesome topics, he would obviously share with his future empress. He wouldn't leave her in the dark when he could prevent it.

Lucille still didn't seem fully certain that he was fine. As she hid her hands behind her back, he could be sure that she was tugging at the skin next to her fingernails again while she spoke up. “It's about...Lady Blanche.”

That was unfavorable. Speaking about Blanche was always painful. The memories of her death seemed to stay fresh no matter what Cedar did. Thus, he hated thinking about her.

But how could Cedar ban the person that had meant so much to him from his mind? He couldn't just forget the nice memories he shared with her. Depending on what the question was, he was even willing to speak about Blanche.