“I love you. Please never forget that. More than anything else.”

Blanche felt like a sword was being stabbed in her heart and turned while being stuck inside her flesh. “Of course. I know that. I also love you more than anything else. What's wrong?”

Theodore let out a mix of a chuckle and a sob. “I'm sorry. I'm overreacting. Everything is fine, but some small things are coming together, and I...I just love you so much. Please don't push me away.”

Now it felt like the sword in her chest had been drenched in acid before entering her body. She felt cold tingles in her limbs and had to hold back not to cry immediately. This wasn't connected to her moving Theodore's hand away right now, was it? That had just been a small motion to prevent him from touching her in public. How could that have upset him so much? “Theo, I would never do that. Is this about what I just did?”

Her lover pressed his face into her neck. “I don't know. But it's not because of that. It's... I went to the cells today, and then I met Cedar, and he... Maybe it sounds stupid when I say it, but seeing him like this is torture. We never got along well, but he used to show his emotions at least a little. He always had some snarky comment on his tongue when we saw each other. Now...he just seems like an empty husk. But that wasn't it. Cedar noticed that I hated the place we visited, so he said so awful things that I... I had to think about some revolting things I did, and I couldn't take it anymore. And then I saw you with those people. All of them are awful. You shouldn't be around them. Lady Ravillot is fine, but the rest isn't... I don't trust them yet.” He paused for a moment to swallow before resuming. “Then you pushed me away, and I thought about you not wanting to be here anymore and I...I-” He cut himself off and gritted his teeth as if he was holding back a sob.

Blanche felt her whole body alternating between feeling way too hot and freezing. Now she regretted not going with him sooner, even though she was aware that this wasn't her fault. She hadn't known that his entire day had been awful. How would she have? She left him for longer than an hour for once, and this was what happened. “I'm sorry, Theo. I didn't know.” By now, she was more than upset too, and her voice broke while she spoke.

Theodore lifted his head and looked at her with teary eyes. “Don't be sorry. You didn't do anything bad. I just thought about the future, no, the past. But that is over. There is no way that I will allow anyone to hurt you. I don't care if I have to crush the dowager empress and Cedar for that. If they target you, I won't have any mercy. Because I love you.”

She wasn't able to speak and just raised her head to get him to kiss her. Their lips met in a soft union. Both didn't have any intention of letting go, even though they were in the middle of the ballroom where countless servants would be able to see them.

Blanche desperately tried to come up with something that she could tell her lover to calm him, but she had no idea what she could do to make up for her pushing him away. She should have looked at him more closely before doing something like that. Then she might have noticed that he wasn't feeling well. When they eventually separated, she opened her mouth to apologize for that again, but he was faster than she.

Theodore loosened his hold on her just so that he could look into her eyes. “Please come with me. Give me an hour to get over this. This is the last time that I'll cry because of that, and afterward, it'll be in the past.” He paused and raised his hand to her face. His fingers ghosted over her cheek before he slowly laid his palm onto her skin. “No, that's not entirely true. I still need to tell you some things. But right now, I'm too cowardly to do it. So, please give me some time. When everything is over, I will tell you all you need to know.” He looked so vulnerable right now that it broke Blanche's heart.

She hurried to stand onto her tiptoes and brought her face as close to his as possible. Her stomach was churning as she clung to him in hopes of soothing both him and her. “I love and trust you. No matter what, I will always be on your side. I don't mind waiting until you are ready to talk about it. But you need to know that I will never judge you for anything you might have done or thought about. I will be right here to console you. So, you don't have to hold back. You're not weak for crying. You need to vent too.”

Theodore's lips formed a little smile, but along with the tears in his eyes, it didn't look very cheerful. “You're always on my side. I know that. I will never doubt it either, so don't keep anything to yourself either. If something is burdening you, about those nightmares or anything else, tell me whenever you're ready. When all of this is over, I don't want any secrets between us.”

Blanche quickly nodded at him. She didn't want to keep secrets from him either. She wanted to tell him everything, but she was scared of the consequences. That had ruined everything once already, so she couldn't let it happen again. She would like to talk about the novel, about her childhood and Sefare's plot and about how she had never wanted to betray Theodore, but all of that would ruin their relationship in some way. Still, she couldn't help but nod when he asked her to be honest. She hated lies, and at some point, hiding all of this might crush her.

So, Blanche needed to speak to him. When he would reveal what he deemed to be important for her to know, she would open up too. Probably not about everything at once but about bits and pieces of the burden she carried around on her shoulders. “I don't want secrets either. But please promise me that you won't judge me like I won't judge you.”

Theodore pulled her against him again. “I promise. I would never do that. I will let you explain everything you need to say, and I won't come to a conclusion before listening to you until the very end. Because I trust you with every fiber of my being.” He buried his nose in her hair while she allowed herself to hide her face by pressing it against his chest. They stood there in silence for a while until her lover eventually spoke up again. “We gave the palace enough gossip material for the next weeks again. Maybe we should go upstairs before anyone else sees us.”

Blanche nodded weakly and grabbed his hand tightly as if her life depended on it as he led her through the hallways. They passed by enough staff members, but the emperor didn't acknowledge their stares. Blanche was a bit embarrassed to see that her lover already looked perfectly normal again while her face was still obviously showing her concern and was, without a doubt, completely red. She averted her gaze whenever she could and moved closer to Theodore, who pulled her against his side and slowed his pace to allow her to continue to walk despite being pressed against him.

When they reached the third floor, entered his room and finally closed the door, she was more than relieved and fell into his arms again. The emperor brought them to the bed and took off her shoes before cuddling her into a blanket and hugging her again. For a few moments, they were silent with only some whispered professions of love and trust while he pressed kiss after kiss onto her face and neck.

When Theodore opened his mouth to speak at a normal volume again, they had already been sitting there a long time. “Let's talk about some more pleasant things. How was the tea party?”

“It was nice. We talked about some interesting subjects.” Blanche leaned her head back against her lover and gave him a short summary of the events while leaving out some uncomfortable details. She ended by describing how he had come, which made her pose a question in return. “I wanted to ask this since earlier, but why did you do that? I mean... If you needed to see me, getting a servant to bring me to you would have been easier. Like this, everyone that was present will be angry. That might cause problems. Especially if someone tells Duke Duremont.”

Theodore stroked his hand through her hair while keeping a hold on her waist with the other arm. He stopped his motion when she asked that before slowly continuing again. “I saw you, and I wasn't able to keep myself from walking to you as quickly as possible. In addition, you looked like something bad had happened, so I wanted to intervene. But you shouldn't worry. We did nothing wrong. After all, this is our home, and we are free to do whatever we want here. All of them know about us already, so no one could complain about us spreading the news about us purposefully either. I don't care for Duke Duremont's everlasting complaints anymore.” He moved his hand to her face and gently grabbed her chin to turn her head around to him. He made eye contact with her and waited for a few seconds before resuming. “But I do care about you being with a group of people that are hostile towards you just because you are my lover. What happened? You didn't look pleased, and everyone else was angry too.”

Blanche chewed on the inside of her cheek as she tried to come up with a way that would understate the impudence of Evelyn's words. Only after a few seconds, she realized that the only one that could be blamed for this incident was the one that had spoken without thinking. There was no need for her to protect Evelyn, and she didn't have the desire to do so either. She could just repeat what that woman had said without caring about how angry the emperor would get. “Lady Lemares was in a very bad mood the whole time. It began as she brought the presents for Grace. The ones that you immediately recognized as dangerous ones. I still don't understand how you did that within a few seconds.”

She hadn't expected a response, but Theodore replied. “Well, I saw them already. Those were similar items to the ones that some servants liked to bring along when I was a child. I remember some of those, and Althea told me about it as well. That's why I'm a bit paranoid when it comes to toys for babies. I double-check things like that whenever I can. Since I already knew that Lady Lemares was mentally ill, I thought that she would be the only one that would possibly get something that could hurt Grace. Unsurprisingly, I was right. You are very observant to have noticed that so fast as well.”

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Blanche's heart ached when she heard that. Her lover had recognized gifts that were purposefully chosen to harm the child and admitted that people had given those to him too. He had mentioned something like this before a few times, but with this context, it was even more painful to hear. She moved around in his hold until he loosened his grasp around her waist so that she could turn her whole body around. “I'm so sorry, Theo. I can't imagine how horrible it must have been to have experienced this as a child. You're...”

The emperor pressed his lips onto her forehead. “It's fine. I don't care about that anymore. All of their attempts failed, which only proves that I managed to grow up well. Surely, it wasn't pleasant, but I won't complain. After all, that led me to where I am now. I wouldn't change anything up until this point even if I had the chance. No, that's a lie. I would change many things, but those would only be aimed at allowing us to be together for longer. But I'm trailing off again. Please tell me more about the party. There was something else aside from the gifts, wasn't there?”

Blanche nodded and tried to remember where she had stopped narrating. “I pointed out that those presents were inappropriate, and Lady Lemares was upset because of this. She accused me of knowing about what could hurt children because I wanted to use it against someone. The others defended me, and she was scolded, which only made her angrier. Then, a few minutes before you came, she suddenly asked whether I was pregnant, which she already did at the hunting festival.”

Theodore's eyes narrowed at that. “I assume that she didn't do so to congratulate us.”

“Of course not. She hates her niece, so she wanted to make the empress uncomfortable. Naturally, she was scolded for that. She seemed to have lost her mind though and just said that the empress wasn't a mother yet and that it would be a good sign if I got pregnant because we need a royal heir. When she was asked about her impudent behavior, she claimed that she hadn't voiced anything wrong.” The more Blanche said, the angrier she got again. None of these words were new to her, but that someone had the nerves to voice them in front of her and Seraphina bordered on unrivaled insolence. Her lover's arrival had distracted her from her rage while Evelyn had been in front of her, but now all of this wrath came flowing back. She gritted her teeth and resumed while giving her best to stay somewhat calm. “She continued by pointing out that the empress needed to have a child to secure the succession to the throne because you wouldn't be stupid enough to name the descendant of a commoner the heir. Then she called me your plaything and said that you would throw me away when you get bored with my appearance. She ended with claiming that the empress needed to hurry with becoming pregnant, or she might not be able to have children anymore.”

Theodore reacted exactly as she had expected him to. The atmosphere in the room seemed to change as his face was overtaken by rage. “She dared to say all of that? Does she have a death wish?” The boiling anger in his eyes would be enough to make most people run away in fear, and Blanche definitely understood why.

But right now, she only had the desire to hug him. So, she did that.

Immediately, her lover pulled her against him and showered her with kisses. It took a while until he stopped doing that and spoke up. “This is the second time that she dared to insult you. I will not let this slide. She will suffer because of this. Not now but in a few weeks. Don't worry about that woman. Forget every single thing she said. Every person in Artias will know that this isn't true. They should have understood by now too, but it seems that some people still need a little hint.” Theodore moved away a bit from her and cupped her cheeks to make her look at him. His eyes were gazing at hers with a piercing stare that seemed to be able to read her every thought. “You know that I would never leave you, right? That is obvious. But there is also something else that you should never forget. Those people need to treat you with respect. Without you, there will be no heir to the throne, and all of them should remember that.”

Blanche froze at that. She stared at her lover with wide eyes. What was he saying? There was no way that he could make a concubine's child the future ruler. Of course, that would be done when there was no other choice, but everyone would question that heir's bloodline. A successor to the throne should always be a wife's child, favorably the empress' one, which was why the topic of having children together had been problematic for the couple. Because in the end, Theodore needed an heir with Seraphina, or the Duremonts would end their relations with him. He was already provoking that family whenever he could right now, which was awfully risky, and now he said something like this?

“But... Theo, I'm a commoner. I don't even have a lower noble rank. You made me a baroness, so that title doesn't mean anything to the aristocrats. They will never accept my child as a worthy member of the royal family.” Her voice was desperate as she dug her fingers into his clothes and almost tipped him over with her weight.

Her lover, on the other hand, was way too calm despite just having stated something that might destroy the power balance in Artias and the nobles' loyalty to their ruler completely. “There is nothing to discuss. If they think about it logically, which I doubt that some of them are capable of, that should have been clear for at least the last year. Our child will the next ruler of Artias. If someone is against that, they just have to ponder about what the other option would be. The only alternative would be the empress having a child that will be a successor to the throne. There is only one issue there. I never touched her, and I won't do so in the future either. The idea of being with any other woman aside from you, especially her, is revolting to me, so there is no way that I could father a child that isn't yours.” He paused for just a short moment as he narrowed his eyes and then resumed. “Unless they drug me, for which I would kill them. Meaning that if the empress has a baby, it's not mine. Why would that child be the heir then, even if she did give birth safely? Your child would be a direct descendant of the royal bloodline, so there shouldn't be any doubt that it's suitable to be the next ruler.”

Blanche was rendered speechless and just stared at him. She barely managed to put her thoughts into coherent sentences in her mind, and voicing them was even harder. “But that... You would reveal our relationship with that. The Duremonts are going to...”

Theodore caressed her cheek gently and pressed his lips onto hers for a short kiss. “They need to understand that this is the only way that they will have an heir. They can also ask my brother to take over after my death, which they will definitely regret. Duke Duremont can't be that stupid. He won't put his personal grudges over the nation's well-being. Aside from that, I never meant to keep our relationship secret. I only did it at first because I knew that the nobles would use everything they can find against me. It was clear that they would criticize my love for you just because they don't know what else to accuse me of. So, I wanted to give them time to get used to it. Now all of them know already, so being with you in public won't cause any problems anymore.”

It absolutely would. Seraphina's and Henry's reaction whenever the emperor sought out his concubine while others were watching made that obvious.

“But of course, there will be-” Blanche was cut off when her lover kissed her again.

Theodore pulled away and looked at her for a couple of seconds before speaking up. “You shouldn't keep putting your worries about politics above your own feelings. Don't remind me of the things that those arrogant nobles could think. Tell me what you want. You wouldn't want me to be with another woman, right? You want to show everyone that we love each other like you did in the past. You just started restraining yourself ever since you had those nightmares. But we both know that what you saw won't happen. So, you don't have to act like you are in constant danger. You can do what you want. And you want me to be by your side during events and to hold your hand right?”

Blanche felt uncertainty rising inside her. She opened her mouth before closing it again. She took a second attempt before speaking. “Of course, I want you with me. And I wouldn't bear the thought of you being with another woman. But...”

“That's exactly how I feel too. And us being happy together is the most important thing, isn't it? So, we will act on our wishes. We did what others wanted for long enough. There won't be anything that can stop us. You trust me, and I trust you. The mother of my children will be you, and one of them will become the royal heir. Let me show you that I'm right about this.”

Blanche shouldn't agree to that. How could she simply say that he knew what he was doing while he was risking destroying his connection to his biggest supporter?

But more than anything else, she wanted to agree. Hiding their relationship forever wasn't impossible, but it would drain the both of them, especially when it came to the topic of needing an heir. Maybe this had bothered her for too long. Maybe changing the novel's storyline had made her too arrogant. Or maybe Evelyn's words had hurt her more than she cared to admit. She didn't know what of that was true.

But in any case, she nodded at her lover. “I trust you. You have to be right.”

Theodore's lips formed a soft smile as he leaned down to her. “I am. I won't ever do something stupid again. I'm the wise and competent ruler of Artias after all. Believe me. I wouldn't risk letting my brother gain power. At least not if I can prevent it. But if I had to accept his victory to protect you, I would do it. I won't lose you no matter what.”

She still didn't know what to say about this, so she just lifted her hand and interlocked her fingers with her lover's ones.

Theodore smiled at her and put the blanket around their bodies again. “Look, we're all comfortable now. I know that we theoretically shouldn't stay inside for the rest of the day, but I would like to have a calmer evening since the morning was this stressful. Can we eat here?”

Blanche cuddled herself into the blanket and leaned her side against her lover. “Sure. I don't want to leave the bed now either. We should have changed into our night clothes already.”

“That might have been clever, but we can't do anything about it now. We will have to stand up one more time later. Only if you don't want to eat your salmon while sitting in bed, of course.”

She had almost forgotten about that. “We're still having salmon?” A bright grin lit up her face, and Theodore mirrored her expression.

“I keep my promises. I said that we could celebrate today, so we will do that. Maybe in an a little more lazy way, but we won't miss out on it. After all, we still made a great accomplishment today. We finally managed to convince the crown prince of Ocrea to come here without any war happening first. We can't forget that just because I was a bit distracted.”

Blanche nodded and choked down her question. The emperor had said that Cedar had been here and had told him a few bad things. She wanted to know what that had been about, but she certainly wouldn't remind her lover of his bad mood. She was overjoyed that he was smiling again, and she intended to protect this smile for as long as possible.

Luckily, she could stay with him the whole night and had enough time to distract him from every horrible thought. She gave her best to do that and grinned at him, even when her muscles began to ache. She insisted on feeding him during dinner and gushed about how tasty the food was while clinging to him. Then she talked about any random lighthearted topic that she could think of and played with his hair while blabbering on.

When they eventually went to bed, she was the one to initiate physical contact and reminded Theodore that she loved him every time she had enough air in her lungs to do that. After they washed each other once more, they lay down to sleep.

Then Blanche hugged him the entire time and caressed his face until she was sure that he was asleep. It was rare that he lost consciousness before her, but she was happy that she managed to watch him until the end of the day. She stared at his peaceful expression for a few more minutes before closing her eyes as well with the plan of continuing like this the next day.

That night, she dreamed about a chandelier that fell and crashed onto the floor as countless people yelled. She awoke in her lover's arms though and quickly forgot about that again.