“Lady Blanche? Are you here?”
The concubine knew that voice. She felt as if all air had been knocked out of her lungs as she raised to her feet with trembling legs. Even though the presumed danger was harmless, her body was still filled with adrenaline as she walked toward the center of the glasshouse with Stella trailing behind her. As soon as she stepped out of the bushes, she put her arms on her hips and glared at the other person. “Sir Aldis, you shouldn't scare two women in the middle of the night.”
Noah bowed immediately before straightening his posture with a serious expression. “I apologize. It was not my intention to surprise you. For that reason, I called your name.”
Stella snorted at that and crossed her arms. “Yes, but that was after we heard the footsteps and thought that our lives would be ended by some intruder.”
Noah bowed again. “I sincerely apologize for that.”
Blanche focused on breathing in and out a few times to calm her pounding heart before walking toward the table. “Well, in the end, I'm just glad that it was you and not someone else. But I'm still perplexed to see you here. Aren't you the empress' new personal guard? Why aren't you with her?”
Noah scratched the back of his head and averted his eyes. “She is in her room and won't leave anymore today. So, I'm free to roam around wherever I like.” It was similar for Owen, but usually, the head knight went to bed as soon as the emperor did so that he could at least go to sleep for a couple of hours.
Blanche scanned the guard in front of her for a moment before speaking up. “Shouldn't you go to bed then? You're still in your uniform, so I assume that this also isn't a night walk for your amusement. Why did you come here? Did you want to see the famous winter garden?”
Noah let out a nervous chuckle. “That too. But actually, I was looking for you.”
“For me?” That took her by surprise, so her voice was higher than she had intended to.
“Yes. But I didn't... I...” The knight turned his head to the side and inspected one of the flower pots that was fastened to the pillar next to him. “I happened to glance out of the window from Her Majesty's room and saw that you were heading through the garden without any guards. So, you not only didn't keep your promise of only going out with me, but you also didn't take anyone else with you, which is more than reckless. I asked Her Majesty whether she still planned on leaving today, and when she denied, I questioned whether I could retreat to lie down in that case. She gave me permission to go, and I ran here. But I lost your trace, and the only clue was the light that was shining out of the building here. So, I entered, but I wasn't certain whether it was truly you. That's why I was so quiet at first.”
Blanche's eyes widened at that. She was convinced that nothing like this had been mentioned in the novel. Noah had become Seraphina's loyal guard and had fallen for the heroine, so naturally, he had also disliked the villainess and often stood between the women to protect his love. How could he leave the empress alone now to search for the villainess, even though there wasn't any immediate danger to be expected within the palace walls? Of course, that was a positive change since it meant that characters that had barely seen the concubine could be influenced by her actions as well. She hadn't interacted with Noah much, and still, that seemed to have been enough to make him worry about her safety more than he did about Seraphina's.
But even if that was good for her, it wasn't favorable for anyone else. Seraphina was fine in her room now, but there was the risk of this becoming a habit. If Noah left his mistress to defend someone else frequently, even though there had just been an assassination attempt a month ago, it would be quite dangerous. If that was found out, Noah would be punished, most likely by losing his position as the empress' guard. That wasn't how the story had been supposed to go.
Blanche took a few seconds to regain her composure and find the words to voice her thoughts in a way that normal people without the book's memories would understand. “You can't simply do something like that. I mean, I feel honored that you care so much, but your first priority should be the empress. Right now, she is in her room, and other knights are probably waiting in front of her door instead of you, but that won't always be the case. You can't get used to running away to deal with something else while the empress needs your protection, or you will accidentally do that at the wrong moment. That's why I also didn't think about our promise. Since you are the empress' personal guard, you don't have much free time anymore. The little time that you have to yourself should be used to sleep so that you are fully rested the next morning. The empress doesn't need someone snoring next to her but someone attentive. So, you don't have any time to deal with my antics. I'm just taking a walk while it's dark. We have a lantern, so tripping, which would be the most dangerous thing here, is unlikely as well.”
Noah scanned the women before imitating Stella and crossing his arms. “You two acted like you were rather scared by footsteps, so you don't seem to be too convinced of that.” He paused to take a deep breath. “I'm not neglecting my duties since Her Majesty is safely in her room, which is being guarded by about six knights the whole time. The third floor is being patrolled as well as the two lower ones. An intruder would have trouble climbing up the stairs without being spotted, and since the whole estate isn't accessible for any outsider, it's almost impossible to sneak up to her room. You might not notice it anymore because you see them so often, but there is a knight at every corner. It doesn't matter much whether I leave now or twenty minutes later since I have to go to sleep. Besides, I had something to tell you. I wanted to talk to you about that earlier, but we didn't have an opportunity back then.”
The concubine met Stella's gaze and looked back after the maid shrugged. Apparently, the servant didn't know what he was referring to. That was very fitting since Blanche didn't have a clue either. She turned to the knight again and spoke up. “Uhm, alright. What is it?”
All of a sudden, Noah bowed again, more deeply this time. He stayed in that position while speaking. “I sincerely apologize from the bottom of my heart. I shouldn't have dismissed your worries about His Majesty as a panic attack. I didn't consider that you could be right at all, even though the assassination attempt had already happened at that moment. Instead of taking you seriously, I insisted on bringing you to the doctor, no matter how often you told me that you didn't need to go there. An apology won't suffice, but I wanted to say that I'm sorry nevertheless.”
Blanche blinked at him as she recounted the events of that awful day. She hadn't even thought about that anymore since her Theodore was almost completely healthy again. Naturally, she hadn't held a grudge against the knight for trying to help either. It was only a bit unfortunate that she had shown that she knew about the attack before it had happened. She didn't have a way to explain that without making herself look suspicious of conspiring with the perpetrators, but luckily, Noah hadn't mentioned anything like that. Most likely, he hadn't even thought about her having information too early, so she would give her best to voice an excuse before that realization crossed his mind. Blanche forced herself to smile as she began while doing her best to sound like she wasn't hiding anything. “Please raise your head, Sir Aldis.”
Noah hesitantly followed her request and looked up at her.
She made eye contact with him and waited for a moment before beginning. “I haven't been angry because of that for one second even back then, and I wasn't mad after either. You only wished to take care of me. How could you have known that it would be more serious than me crying for no reason? You see, I was unwell the whole day because I had dreamed about Theodore being hurt. So, I was on edge and got nauseous when I remembered my fear. I somehow had a panic attack because of that. It's odd. Even I can't explain why my mind came up with that on that day, but even I didn't know what occurred while I was breaking down. So, I won't blame you or anyone else for believing that my brain was playing tricks on me. In fact, you were the only person that tried something that reached me despite my panic. So, you did everything right. I haven't thanked you for that yet, have I? Then I will do so now. Thank you for helping me to the best of your ability.”
Noah appeared to be bewildered by that and just stared at her with widened eyes for a moment. Then his characteristic gentle smile returned. “In that case, I'm happy that you aren't upset with me because of that. In the future, I will take all of your worries seriously.” That was a tempting offer.
Blanche wouldn't be able to tell him about much, but one thing came to her mind. Her expression became serious when she addressed him again. “Then I would like you to pay attention to one person. Evelyn Lemares is the empress' aunt and was my tutor for a week, after which she was thrown out because she insulted me.”
Noah frowned but let her resume.
“I feel like she is mentally unstable, so I would ask you to keep an eye on her when she is near. Especially around the little Grace, the daughter of Sophia Ravillot. She wouldn't be able to defend herself if anything happened.” Blanche had expected to find a hint of doubt when she looked into the knight's face, but he just nodded. At that moment, something else appeared in her mind. “Ah, I forgot. There is also someone else. Her name is Kate, and she is one of the empress' maids, so you should know her. I do not think that she is very loyal, so her intentions might become vile at some point. I can't guarantee that she would actually harm the empress, but you can't be sure.”
Again, Noah didn't hesitate to nod. “Thank you for your advice. I will remember it well.”
That left Blanche speechless. Was this one event really enough for him to trust her unconditionally? If so, he was a bit careless. Judging by her previous behavior, anyone would assume that she had bad intentions, so he didn't have a reason to believe her like this.
Blanche didn't say that though and just sat down at the table while gesturing to the others. “Thank you. Would you like to sit down? We came here to look at the stars, so we should do that for a few minutes before returning. I'm getting a little tired.” That was a lie, but she knew that Noah would stay until they left, and he deserved some sleep after following Seraphina the whole day.
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In the end, they didn't stay for too long. After a couple of minutes of admiring the beautiful night sky, Stella began yawning, which was the sign for them to stop. The group walked toward one of the palace's side entrances when voices sounded from around the corner. It seemed like there were multiple men there, which was rather unusual since it was very late.
Blanche came to a halt and held her index finger to her mouth to signal the others to be quiet. Listening for a few seconds to ensure that she wouldn't run into an unpleasant situation seemed logical. If it was something stressful, they could just leave silently enter the palace through another door, so she had nothing to lose. She didn't dare to step closer out of fear of alerting the men, but she was able to hear everything, so it wasn't a problem that she couldn't see them around the corner.
One of the people there had been talking for a while and just finished when another man spoke up.
“So, he didn't say anything. Great.”
A third voice chimed in. “What will we do now? Without a confession, holding a trial will be hard.”
“That isn't the issue here. We have more than enough evidence to convict him. I would just have liked to hear about his motives. Though, I assume that we will be able to get answers from him soon.”
Blanche froze as she heard that voice. She didn't need to think twice to know who that person was. Why was Theodore speaking to other people in the garden in the middle of the night? His voice sounded cold, so they had to focus on a serious topic.
Another voice replied, and it sounded like that could be Leon. “Until now, he kept quiet without opening his mouth. Changing that might require more convincing. Since his crime is extremely severe, we could use the harsher measures.”
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The emperor responded again. “Of course. We have to inform our new allies about this incident, so I need all the details about who that man is, with whom he works and why he did such a thing. Get him to talk. I don't care how.” The icy tone in his voice sounded so unnatural to the concubine that she almost shivered as he spoke and feared to give her presence away by making some noise.
Luckily, the men continued the conversation without hesitating, and Leonard responded. “I understand. I will take care of that myself. It'll be faster this way.”
“Then I will leave-” Theodore cut himself off and remained quiet for a moment before continuing. “No, I will come with you. Maybe we can get our information better in a different way. He'll open up if I talk to him for a bit.”
Blanche, who was still frozen in place, had heard enough at that point. She shook her head to herself and decided to withdraw. She didn't want to eavesdrop on her lover. Even if she wasn't certain what this was about, she wouldn't question it. If he didn't tell her, he would deal with this alone, and there was no reason for her to get involved. So, she turned around to leave, but she still understood what Leon said.
“Are you sure? That's not a pleasant task to fulfill. It'll take a while and get messy. Until now, you always left this to me.”
Theodore responded, still in that cool tone. “I don't plan on doing anything yet. I'm certain that a few deliberate words are enough to convince him to use his mouth. Let's just hope that that will suffice for now.”
Her lover's response was the last sentence Blanche overheard before trying to enter the palace through a side door.
But before she could do that, a voice called out to her from behind. “Who's there? Stop!
Blanche flinched at that and slowly turned around to face three royal knights that were aiming their swords at her, Stella and Noah. Even though she knew that they wouldn't do anything to her, she quickly lifted her hands to show that she was unarmed and froze in that position. Bad memories of being dragged to a certain cell flooded her mind, but Blanche forced herself to focus on the presence. She wouldn't be hurt here, she told herself that a few times.
After all, Theodore loved her here and wouldn't execute her. She hadn't done a thing that could be named treason. She also wasn't alone.
Noah, for one, had already drawn his sword before he and his colleagues recognized each other. Just like that, the tension disappeared again.
The knights also identified the concubine and lowered their weapons. Seconds later, Theodore, Leonard and Owen rounded the corner and came into her field of view. The former two had rather dim expressions that switched into displays of pure shock upon seeing the people that had disturbed them.
Especially the emperor turned pale. “Blanche?” He just stared at his lover, and his mouth opened and closed without him saying anything. For a few seconds, he stood there motionlessly before he hurried toward her. “Let me explain.”
Blanche wanted to tell him that it was fine, that he didn't have to show her that defeated look, but Theodore already grabbed her hand and pulled her toward the entrance. Everything seemed to happen within a second as he ushered her into the palace and through the almost empty corridor into the next room without giving her or anyone else a chance to say anything. The guards were left behind.
As soon as they were alone in the storage room, Theodore shut the door with great care and then turned around. Like a switch had been flipped, none of his previous coldness remained. Instead, a far more awful emotion showed on his face. “That was... I didn't...” He couldn't even finish that sentence as he stared at her with despair in his eyes.
That was enough to make her heart ache, so Blanche quickly closed the remaining distance between them and put her arms around him. “I'm sorry for being nosy. I passed by and heard a bit, but I was about to leave. You don't have to be upset. I won't get involved.”
Theodore didn't calm down though. Instead, he just seemed even more dejected despite this little incident. He tightened his hold on her until he was engulfing her in a crushing embrace, and it felt like her feet were barely touching the ground anymore. He buried his face in her neck and inhaled deeply before mumbling. “What you just heard isn't... We were discussing something that is connected to a very serious crime, and that's why we mentioned that we would-” He stopped in the middle of the sentence and pressed his nose deeper into her skin.
Blanche gave her best to ignore the stinging feeling at her lover's uncertainty and attempted to stroke over his back as well as she could while he was holding her up. She turned her head to press a kiss onto the side of his head, which already forced her to twist her neck in an unpleasant angle. “What you talked about has nothing to do with me. I shouldn't have heard that in the first place, so I won't mention it anymore. I'm sorry.” She didn't care for what happened to criminals that had been convicted for something so vile that it would force the emperor to get involved. At least as long she wasn't in that spot.
Theodore lifted his head with a jolt and made eye contact, with his distress being still visible on his face. “That's not what I meant. I...” He breathed in and out a few times before resuming. “Please don't think that I'm awful because of this. It's nothing like what you might think. This time, we have no choice but to-” It was too painful to hear him speak like that.
Blanche cut him off with another kiss. This time, she managed to reach his lips and pressed hers onto his for a short moment. She would have liked to pat his head too, but her arms were still restrained by his grip on her. When she backed away a bit, he was staring at her with wide teary eyes, which broke her heart. “Don't look at me like that.” She wiggled her arms until she managed to free one after the other and wrapped them around his neck. “I'm not angry, I'm not sad, and I don't think anything bad about you either. I love you! You are the person that I trust most in this world. You don't have to justify your actions as the emperor. I know that unpleasant things have to be done sometimes, and that can be horrible. But sometimes, you are forced to make sacrifices to protect what you care about. If you need to put this person on trial to make sure that nothing like this happens again and to find out who the puppeteers are, you need a testimony. Why would I blame you for that?”
While speaking, Blanche had unwillingly begun to squeeze her lover much too tightly and quickly forced herself to calm down. She glared at her lover for a moment. “Look, now I'm upset too. I wouldn't ever think badly about you without giving you a chance to explain yourself.” Never. She knew what it would feel like if it happened to her after all. “And in this case, I don't need an explanation at all. You're never unnecessarily cruel, so don't worry about me thinking that.”
Theodore looked at her as if she was the only light in an endless tunnel of darkness. He only managed to press out a hoarse “Thank you. I love you” before burying his face in her neck again.
Blanche could only hug him back while asking herself why Theodore was so uncertain about her love. She had made it clear that he was her everything, hadn't she? Even after all that had happened, she would never stop loving him or want to leave his side. Besides, who was she to judge? Theodore would certainly never do anything cruel if he wasn't certain that it was necessary. And so, Blanche spent the next minutes trying to convince him that she couldn't care less about which methods he might use to rule this nation. Even if this made her morally gray, she didn't care.
Theodore took a while to calm down, and she used that time to repeatedly tell him how much she loved him, which might have caused him to take longer. When he had stopped crying, he lifted his head and grabbed her hand to slowly lead her out of the room. He brought her to the others, who had previously watched the emperor storming off with his lover.
All the people from before were still standing by the entrance to the palace with expressions that ranged from shock to concern.
The emperor suddenly seemed like his usual calm self again as he spoke up in a confident voice. “Leon, you go talk to him. Give him a clear summary of our plan. I will visit him tomorrow, and in the meantime, I want him to have made up his mind. I can intimidate him a bit just by voicing empty threats, but I won't waste my time. He will be convicted for the highest level of treason against all of Artias soon, so he should better speak if he wants to make his punishment any lighter.”
Leonard nodded at that. “Yes, of course.”
Theodore instructed the remaining guards before dismissing them without letting go of his lover's hand in the process. When the men had dispersed, he faced her again. His eyes were still a bit red, but he was good at hiding how sensitive he had just been a moment ago even as he stood much closer to his lover than he usually would. “I'm sorry for dealing with this now, but it's over. I can bring you to our room.” He paused for a split second before continuing in a lowered voice. “I was a bit surprised that we suddenly ran into each other like this. What were you doing in the garden in the middle of the night? And why is the empress' knight here?” He eyed Noah skeptically before making eye contact with Blanche.
She summarized it for him. “I was stargazing with Stella, and Sir Aldis saw that we were running around in the winter garden alone, so he joined us.” When her lover frowned at her, she quickly added another sentence. “I'm not going out secretly often though. This was an exception.”
Theodore's expression lightened up a bit. “That wasn't what I was thinking about. You can go to every spot within the royal estate whenever you want to. It would be better to take guards with you at night, but there isn't a place that you are forbidden from entering.”
Inwardly, the concubine began to list the places where she actually shouldn't go but kept quiet about that. The emperor had been serious about insisting that she could move freely in the palace ever since he had allowed her to enter his office without asking for permission, so she wouldn't be able to convince him now. And frankly, she was too exhausted to argue. It had to be past midnight by now, and she was slowly getting tired.
Blanche hid a yawn behind her hand as she leaned against her lover's side. “I want to go to bed now.”
Theodore gave her a look full of fondness and chuckled at that. “It's late, so that is only natural. What keeps you from doing that?”
The response came immediately. “The stairs. I don't want to go up to the third floor.” She was purposefully whining a bit in hopes that he would bring her to her room so that she could enjoy his company for the last few minutes before she would fall asleep, possibly to cheer him up a bit more after this scene. She hadn't expected his overly enthusiastic response though.
“It can't be helped then.” Before she could react, Theodore let go of her and leaned down to put one hand on her back and one behind her legs. He picked her up with ease, and she quickly wrapped her arms around his neck. “I'll take on the stairs so that you don't have to.”
Blanche almost squealed with joy about being able to use this opportunity to properly distract her lover from what clearly still bothered him a bit, but another yawn cut her off.
That made Theodore grin, and he turned around to the remaining people. “You are dismissed for the night, Sir Aldis. Go rest so that you are fully energized for the next day.” Then he looked at Stella. “You'll bring the usual clothes for your mistress to my room. After that, you are dismissed too.”
Both addressed people nodded and left after waving the concubine goodbye.
Theodore took that as his cue to move forward. He climbed up the stairs so quickly that Blanche began suspecting that he had trained his stamina for a while. When they reached the third floor, he didn't enter the corridor that led to her room but the one that was next to his chambers. He looked down at her with a soft smile and spoke up. “Would you sleep in my room again? I just ordered your maid to bring your things to my room, but I didn't ask yet.”
Blanche nodded happily. “Of course, I'll stay. So, my wishes were heard by the gods. I don't have to sleep all alone.” This had nothing to do with any gods but rather with the fact that she had interrupted her lover talking about confidential things and him wanting to spend time with her after being scared of her rejecting him for that. That thought alone was ridiculous but also depressing at the same time, so she pressed herself closer against him.
They reached their destination quickly. The guards by the door opened it for them after giving them a strange look.
When the couple stepped into the room, Theodore closed the door with his foot. He carried his lover to the bed and carefully placed her on the mattress. He put a few kisses onto her collarbone before sitting next to her to take her shoes off. He got rid of his shoes too and immediately lay down next to her. For a moment, he was directly in front of her as he stroked a strand of her hair away from her face and just looked at her.
The presence of her lover was enough to fill Blanche with bliss, even though her eyelids became heavier with every second.
The only thing that kept her from falling asleep was Theodore speaking up. “I love you more than anything in this world. I know that I don't deserve you, but I can promise you one thing. I will do anything in my power to keep you safe. And I'll never condemn you for anything. I know what you wouldn't do, so I won't believe made-up stories about you no matter who tells me about them. I will ask you about what happened first and believe in you until the very end. Your version of the story is the one that matters.”
Despite her tiredness, Blanche began to worry and pressed her lips into a thin line. Why did her lover have to say things like that now? She was already emotional because she had just seen him cry, so she would definitely not take it well if he said anything else. But she couldn't refrain from replying either, even though she knew that that would break her self-control. “I'm the one that doesn't deserve you. You give me so much that I could have never imagined. Your love and affection. A safe home with many friends. And you give me so many presents that I feel horrible about it because I will never be able to return things of such great value.”
Theodore put his hand onto her cheek and gently caressed her skin. “That's not true. You brought light into my life, and I don't need anything but you. You're everything that I could ever ask for. That's why I will also stay with you forever. Nothing will ever come between us, may it be something from the future or the past.”
Even if those were words that he had said to her a few times already with slightly different phrases, she couldn't help but feel her heart melt as soon as they left his mouth. She wanted him to tell the truth so badly. She needed him to promise that no matter what the empress, Duke Duremont, Duke Vasquez or Marquess Sefare did, it wouldn't destroy their relationship. Of course, she couldn't ask him to do that.
But Blanche also couldn't keep her mouth closed, so she left out all the details and still spoke up. “Promise me that you won't doubt my devotion to you no matter what. That you'll let me explain first because I would never risk hurting you with my actions unless I had no other choice.” The way that her voice broke had to have given away that she was thinking about something specific. That realization only made her heart skip a beat out of fear.
Without hesitation, Theodore linked their pinkie fingers and made eye contact. “I promise. I swear that on my life.”
She wasn't able to keep herself from hugging him when he said that and just cuddled into him as much as she could. Her lover immediately returned the gesture and engulfed them in a blanket, which made her feel even more protected than before. Theodore wasn't a person that broke promises, so she had to trust that he would fulfill this one as well.
For her, there was no other choice. If her past was revealed and he didn't listen to her, she would die of a broken heart. She was sure of that since her chest was already aching as if she had been pierced with an arrow at the thought of him pushing her away.
Luckily, Theodore was as keen on holding her close as she was on staying with him. They didn't even leave the bed to get the clothes from Stella. The maid had to enter and put the nightgown next to the cuddly mountain underneath the blankets before leaving without catching a glimpse of the couple. They barely managed to change their clothes since they still weren't willing to let go of each other, but somehow they did it. Then they covered themselves with the blanket again and fell asleep as Theodore's forgotten tears slowly began to dry.