Blanche watched Theodore disappear and got lost in thoughts for a bit. She wasn't alone for longer than a few seconds though, since Stella caught up to her quickly. She turned to her maid and exhaled loudly. “It's almost scary how easily he seems to deal with such a flesh wound. His shoulder was slit open with a sword. I mean, I'm happy that it doesn't pain him, but it's strange.” Only when she finished talking, she realized that her servant didn't seem to be as pleased as she was. “Is something wrong?” She paused for a moment before a realization appeared in her mind. “Ah, I'm sorry for not telling you anything. Theo was unconscious until this morning, and I didn't think about anything but him, so-” The maid's frown stopped her.
Stella crossed her arms and met her mistress' gaze with worry. “That's not it. I understand that you were too distressed to leave his side. I'm just wondering why you think that His Majesty's painlessness is the scariest part about this incident. Did you see his face just now?”
Blanche froze at those words. “What do you mean? He had his normal expression. The one he always has to exhibit his authority in front of others.”
Stella paused for a moment. She lifted her hand to her mouth and covered it as the gears in her head were turning. Then she lowered her arm and shook her head. “No, that wasn't it. Of course, it's possible that I imagined it, but I'm pretty sure that I have the correct image in my mind. His expression was the same, but his eyes were different.” Now she was beginning to scare Blanche.
The concubine almost didn't want to ask, but she was too worried. “How so?”
“He had such a cold look. Like...” Stella struggled to find the right words and hesitated before continuing as she gestured around. “He seemed like a man that just survived a war. Yes, that is a good simile.”
Blanche felt a sting at her heart at that. A bystander had noticed that Theodore was still suffering, and his own lover hadn't even seen the full extent of it. But at least she had noticed that he hadn't put the assassination attempt behind him. She needed to make sure that her lover would process this properly now. Blanche was quiet for a while before replying. “In some way, he did survive a war. He was just attacked by a group of mercenaries without having a chance to prepare himself. Then he had to fight for his life despite not being very experienced with a sword. Something like that is traumatic, even if you are the emperor. He won't forget that any time soon.”
And she could have prevented him from having to go through that if she had just remembered earlier.
Blanche paused for a moment to keep herself composed before voicing her conclusion. “I can't change anything about what happened. I can just stay by his side and try to encourage him to focus on other things. I'll make sure to distract him whenever I can.” This was the least she could do after messing up so badly.
Stella nodded and stepped closer to her. “You're right, that seems logical. We should get you bathed and changed before that though. We don't want to take too long and make him wait.”
Blanche quickly agreed and allowed her maid to guide her to the third floor. The bath was prepared within a few minutes, and the concubine had to admit that changing out of the old dress was pleasant. She emerged herself into the hot water and let out a sigh when the muscles of her back finally relaxed a bit.
But even though her body was refreshed by the bath, her mind was still as busy as before. She recounted everything that she knew about the assassination attempt in the novel to try to find out whether she could get any useful piece of information out of that. As far as she remembered, the incident hadn't been cleared up by the end of the first book, and no perpetrator had been named due to the lack of decisive evidence. One would assume that the Vasquez family or Marquess Sefare were involved, but she had no proof on which she could base that guess.
In the novel, the attack had only served to increase the tension and get the main characters to kiss so that their romance would begin to develop. Theodore's wound had been described as a cut on his left shoulder that he had gotten because he had jumped in front of Seraphina to protect her. He had been forced to stay in bed for a while after that but crept out to visit the heroine, which Blanche had successfully prevented this morning.
If she remembered correctly, the Theodore of the novel had only felt mild discomfort during his recovery until the hunting festival. That day, he had been forced to run around and aim with a bow and thus strained his barely healed shoulder. Luckily, he hadn't reopened the wound, but he had been in pain after that, which was why the empress had been so keen on praising him. This meant that Blanche's goal was to keep him from participating in the competition. Then he wouldn't hurt himself, and another event with the heroine would be prevented. The only real problem was his perseverance.
If Theodore insisted on taking part, Blanche had no way to forcibly stop him. But as long as she bargained a bit, she might be able to convince him. After all, he had always hated hunting, especially in a competition. Since he intended to publish a letter about the attack anyway, he might as well use his injury as an excuse to avoid the event he disliked so much.
Blanche was content with that solution as she climbed out of the bathtub and dried herself. Stella helped her change into a simple light yellow dress with thin fabric, which should be suitable for an evening that she suspected to consist out of nothing but cuddling.
One look at the clock showed her that she hadn't taken too long, but she hurried to the emperor's chambers to not let him wait anyway. Being alone with no duties might make Theodore dwell on the events of the previous day, which she had to avoid. The guards didn't stop her when she entered, so Theodore had to have announced her presence already. The concubine dismissed Stella for the day since she expected to stay the night and entered the emperor's chambers. She looked into every room that belonged to Theodore's personal area, but her lover hadn't arrived yet.
So, Blanche was left with nothing to do and began to inspect the furniture more closely. Despite her disinterest in books and the emperor's obvious preference for political or economic guides, reading their titles was one of the most entertaining things. Though the most eye-catching pieces were still the decorations.
Countless valuable accessories and antiques stood in every cupboard and on every dresser. Blanche refrained from touching most of them to not accidentally break them due to her clumsiness, but she couldn't help herself upon finding a fan in the royal colors. The handle was made out of black wood, and the deep blue fabric was adorned with golden flowers, which were twining themselves around thin vines. Her hands grabbed the item before she could think about it. Carefully, she opened it and stared at the beautiful decorations in awe. She slowly began to fan herself while spinning around and dancing as she swayed the accessory from side to side with smooth movements.
Blanche was so immersed in herself that she only noticed Theodore when he stood directly in front of her. She jumped at the sudden appearance, and the fan fell out of her hand, only for her lover to catch it.
Theodore happily showed it to her. “You can have it if you want to. It's better if you actually use it instead of letting it stand around here for decorative purposes. In fact, you can have everything here as long as you don't take out all items at the same time. Even though it's pretty useless, I would like to keep a few decorations here, just because the room would look empty otherwise.”
Blanche's heart was still thumping in her chest due to the surprise. She had trouble calming down and pressed her hand onto her chest before taking a few deep breaths. “You scared me, Theo. I didn't notice you at all. Since when were you so quiet?”
Theodore laughed at that. “I already guessed that you didn't see me when you danced around like that. It's adorable. I should creep up on you more often.”
“Please don't. My heart won't take that.”
Her lover stepped closer to her with a soft smile that spread across his whole face. He extended his arm and held the fan in her direction. “So, do you want to have it?”
She did.
The childish part inside Blanche was already in love with that accessory and wished to possess it like it was the case with gorgeous pieces of jewelry. She was already opening her mouth to agree, but then she remembered the words Theodore had voiced in her nightmare all of a sudden.
Even though that part hadn't been in the novel, it seemed to follow after the scene in which the villainess had been arrested. So, it wasn't unthinkable that the things that her lover had told her while she sat in that cell were what he truly thought. That dream's Theodore had said that she didn't value his gifts and that he was sick of her materialism. Her lover would never express something like that, but maybe it was how he felt deep inside of him. She couldn't be sure, but she didn't need that fan, and being modest was on her list of things that she should do to prevent becoming a villainess anyway. So, she should decline instead of accidentally hurting her lover with her greed.
Blanche forced herself to smile while she ignored the aching of her heart at the unpleasant memory. “No, thank you. It's beautiful, but I don't need any fans. I already have a few and never use them, so it's better if they decorate your room.”
Theodore's face fell at that. “But it doesn't necessarily have to be here either. If you like it, you don't need to think about whether you actually require it. In our current position, we have way too much of everything anyway.”
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Blanche was about to give in, but a single fragment of a memory of the emperor's hateful gaze while he told her those things in her nightmare stopped her. She shook her head and demonstratively moved his hand away from her. “It's fine. I can live without it. Besides, these colors are the ones that I can't even wear, so it would just lie around in my room in a drawer. Here, it can decorate the dresser and make everything look better.”
Theodore didn't seem too pleased about her decision. He frowned and just stared at her for a while before putting the fan back onto the holder. Then he turned to her again and spoke up. “I don't know why you shouldn't be able to have an accessory like this. It would match your blue gown. But if you really won't take it, I'll leave it here for you. You can always come and borrow it whenever you want to. It's the same for all the other things here. I will tell the guards to let you in even when I'm not here, and then you can look around at all times. As I said, you're free to keep the things too.” He insisted on her taking the fan for some reason.
Blanche held back a sigh and stepped closer to hug him with care to not touch his wounded shoulder. “You can't just give a guest permission to go into the emperor's room and claim his things. That will definitely seem odd to people and cause rumors about me forcing you to give me more and more gifts. We don't want that, right? And in the first place, I didn't come to your room to steal your things as soon as I enter but to spend time with you. That I was running around and gawking at the decorations must have looked strange to you too. I only touched the fan though, so at least I didn't break anything.”
Theodore's hand immediately framed her face, and he tilted her head so that she was looking at him. “I couldn't care less about other people. If they want to complain, they should tell me personally, and I will gladly answer all of their questions in a manner that will silence them for good. Our relationship only concerns us, and I don't have a problem with you looking at my things, touching them or keeping them. In fact, it makes me happy to see your eyes shine when you see an item you like. If you accidentally broke something, which you have never done before, I wouldn't be angry either. I would ask a jeweler to create a replica, and the issue would be resolved. But it seems like I have to clarify something.” He paused to make sure she was meeting his gaze before continuing. “You can't steal anything that belongs to me. Everything that is mine is yours too. So, you have free rein to do whatever you want with your possessions.”
Now he was just overdoing it.
That caught Blanche off guard. She blinked a few times as her disbelief appeared on her features. “Saying that is a bit excessive, isn't it? I mean, I'm happy that you feel that way, and I would also hand over everything I own to you in an instant, but it's a little different in my case. Nothing in my room actually belongs to me. Everything was a gift from you or a noble that gifted me something because you arranged a birthday party for me. It's already bad enough that I can't give anything back, but you, as the emperor, can't just say that your things are mine. The palace and the royal estate belong to you, and I'm only a baroness that is known as a guest here. How could I claim the right to call this my own without ever lifting a finger to help anyone here?”
Theodore still didn't show any signs of understanding even when his lover said this.
Blanche paused to let him react, but no agreement followed, so she added another part. “In some sense, the whole nation belongs to the emperor as well. Are you just going to say that a young woman with an unknown background, who suddenly appeared here, can state that she is entitled to have a claim on Artias? If I did that, it would be very presumptuous, possibly even more arrogant than anything I have ever done.” Of course, she would have never considered voicing insolent remarks like that even in the times in which she had been hungry for power. Now she had simply exaggerated to show him how ridiculous his words were.
Yet, Theodore's expression was completely serious. “My statement wasn't ambiguous, was it? I said what I meant to say. I wouldn't necessarily claim that Artias belongs to me, but I'm free to make decisions that affect all citizens and our country's development, so that isn't entirely wrong. Regarding the palace, you have already been here long enough to not call yourself a guest. This is your home, isn't it? The servants should listen to you as they do when Leon or I give orders. If some people haven't understood that until now, I will have to have a word with them. That's why I also don't mind announcing that you are free to enter every room in the palace whenever you want.”
Theodore slowly led her to the table while he spoke and moved one of the chairs to the other side so that they could sit next to each other. Then he gestured to the table, and the both of them took a seat. His movements looked smooth as if he didn't have any pain in his shoulder even when he lifted the chair with both arms, which should have strained his wound. However, while his body seemed to be fine, his mind appeared to be a bit hazy.
Theodore tended to get emotional whenever he was tired or exhausted, so he had to be drained right now. After all, he kept voicing statements that were completely over-stressed.
It was obvious that Theodore was expressing his love for his concubine, but his ideas currently bordered on insanity. Any person with just a little knowledge about the ranks in the society of aristocrats knew that. Only the master and the mistress of a household could claim the right to go wherever they want at any given time. Blanche was neither the emperor nor the empress, so it was clear that she wasn't entitled to do something like this. One was honored just by being allowed to stay in the royal palace, and then acting like one owned the building was possibly one of the worst things a person could do.
Especially the concubine, who had been in conflict with the conventions and rules of nobility countless times, had to refrain from doing anything similar to this. Even if it was only to keep the servants from despising her for her impudence. Normally, she might attempt to remind Theodore of that, but the fact that he was still in shock from the attack made her try a more subtle approach.
Blanche hoped that she would get through to him with this. “You know that I'm officially a guest in the palace. Every single person in the capital knows that this is an excuse. Still, it's the word that describes my role here. If we don't want to infuriate and insult the Duremont family even more, we should stick to that phrase. And as long as we do that, I have to follow the rules as a guest too. Anything else would attract harmful gossip that we can do without.”
Theodore almost appeared to sulk at that. He pressed his lips into a thin line and was silent for a moment, in which he grabbed her hand. She was already prepared to counter another one of his illogical remarks, but he kept quiet. His expression slowly softened, which could only mean that he finally thought about the consequences his words could have if the wrong person heard them. He moved her hand to his face and pressed a kiss on it. “I asked for dinner to be served in a few minutes. Will you stay with me for the night?”
There was no need to ponder about her reply. “Of course. I already expected that. This time, I'll make sure that you sleep instead of writing the whole night.”
Her lover let out a chuckle. “I don't intend to write again. I'm done with the list of things that I can remember on the spot. I'll need more time for the rest and plan things out with the help of some documents. For once, it seems to be useful to have kept all of those folders, even though Leon complains about how long it takes the servants to clean the shelves each day.”
Blanche was a bit alarmed to hear that. “It almost sounds like you want to work again as soon as possible. You were so drained for the past weeks. Don't you think that taking a break right now will be beneficial for your health? Just for a few days? You could replenish your energy by sleeping enough for once and give your wound time to heal. I'm sure that you will feel much better if you relax for a while. When you return to your work after that, you might be more efficient too.” She didn't truly believe that her words would change anything, but she tried it anyway.
Naturally, Theodore quickly made her realize that she had no chance. He squeezed her hand and gave her a bright smile that was probably meant to calm her down. “I wouldn't take care of unimportant things right now. I will deal with topics that are crucial for our future. I can't rush anything in most cases, so I have to slowly begin to set the course for a couple of developments that need to happen. Most of the time, I'll just write and talk to a few important people that I still have to invite. Whether I sit around on my bed or on my chair in the office is not much of a difference. So, you can stop worrying about me. Believe me, as soon as I feel the slightest increase of the pain, I will tell both you and the doctor and stay in bed to recover fully. It won't happen though. I'm pretty sure of that, but if it does get worse, I promise to react instantly.”
Blanche bit her lip as she remembered Stella's words. Images of her lover's rapidly changing emotions and sounds of his sobbing after waking up filled her mind. This wasn't just about the external wound. She couldn't keep him from working, and maybe dealing with politics would distract him, but she still felt like he should relax for a bit before jumping back into action. “Theo, I might not have the right to interfere-”
Her lover cut her off before she could finish the first sentence while looking a bit too serious. “You aren't interfering with anything. You are the most important part of my life, so you can voice your opinion about every little thing that happens. I want you to know that I care about how you feel and will always try to pay attention to your views while making my decisions. If I have to do something that you can't understand, I will give my best to explain it to you. In the case that I might not be able to reveal everything, you can still be certain that I will make a choice that is good for us.” He made eye contact with her and intertwined their fingers as if he wanted to emphasize his words.
Just hearing this little declaration almost made Blanche tear up, but she quickly focused on her the statement that she had originally wanted to voice. “Alright.” She inhaled shakily before resuming. “I worry that working already might be too early. After all, your shoulder isn't the only thing that hinders you right now.”
Theodore didn't seem to realize what she was referring to since he still waited for her to resume.
Blanche did him the favor. “When you opened your eyes, you were completely disoriented for a while. At first, you sobbed, then you suddenly laughed. And when we were lying in bed, I also heard you cry while you thought that I was sleeping. Some mercenaries ambushed your carriage without a warning, and you had to protect yourself and the empress with a sword despite not being comfortable using a weapon. It's only normal for you to be traumatized after that. You don't have to hide it from me. If you want to cry, then you can do it while I'm here to comfort you, and then we'll-” She interrupted herself as her voice broke.
Theodore moved his chair closer to her and pulled her into his arms, which only made her want to cry more.
“Why are you the one consoling me now? That's not right.” She barely managed to press out these words before her lover already spoke up.
Theodore managed to sound so calm while he whispered to her. “It's alright. You are worrying more than me, so of course, you'd become emotional. But you really don't have to be concerned. I didn't cry because of the attack.”
Blanche leaned back to meet his gaze. “What do you mean? I heard you. You don't have to hide anything.”
“I'm not hiding anything.” Theodore gently raked his fingers through her hair before rubbing small patterns into her scalp. “I did cry, but that had nothing to do with that incident. Or rather, it was indirectly caused by the incident, but I wasn't shocked because of the fight. I was crying because I thought that I wouldn't be able to return. And then you sat there while holding my hand and talking to me. At first, I didn't believe that the gods were so gracious with me, so I was convinced that I was dreaming. But I was awake, and you were there, directly next to me. At that moment, I was scared to open my eyes and find you gone. And at the same time, I was so happy that you were there. That's why I acted that strangely.”
Blanche paused for a moment to process his words. While she would be happy to hear that the reason had been something that was solved now, she was skeptical. What Theodore had said would explain his behavior but not Stella's comment about him having a cold gaze. Besides, there was no way that the ambush hadn't affected him at all. “That can be a reason too. And believe me, I would be glad if you could just move on from this incident without trouble. But these people tried to kill you. It would be weird if you weren't scared, even if it's just a little bit.”
Theodore shook his head as he responded. “I'm not intimidated by the attack. I'm only angry because someone was foolish enough to think that a group of unskilled mercenaries would be able to defeat the royal guards.” He hesitated for a few seconds before continuing. “For a different person, it might be traumatic to barely survive after something like this, but I wasn't hurt badly. Frankly speaking, I wouldn't compare myself to a normal citizen that lived a calm life either. I didn't lie when I said that I've been through worse. I...” He paused again, this time a little bit longer.
Blanche already tensed when she heard that. If getting attacked by people that wished to kill you wasn't anything new to Theodore, the explanation could only be horrifying. She almost didn't want to find out about this, but of course, she stayed quiet to listen to everything her lover could say.
After Theodore pondered about it for a moment, a frown appeared on his face and slowly deepened before he seemed to have a realization. “I told you that, didn't I? I spoke to you about my childhood already. About how my father didn't value regular investigations of the staff in the palace. As a consequence, there were some rather unsavory people inside. My brother might have had some issues too, but the favorite target was obviously the crown prince, me. I was tied up and thrown into a room or a vehicle until one of the guards noticed that I was gone three or four times. No one managed to kidnap me in the end, and after a few attempts, they gave up. Then they tried to feed me walnuts, which I'm allergic to, and so on. Whoever was behind that chose a different approach after I grew up though.” His tone already proved that the story wouldn't become more pleasant from now on but rather worse.
Blanche braced herself for that and closely listened to him as he resumed.