John sat on his cozy couch, a plate of biscuits resting on his lap, and the TV droning in the background. It was a peaceful morning, and he was thoroughly enjoying his snack.
Just as he was about to take a bite of one of his biscuits, a sudden knock on the door disrupted him. John's sighed as he mumbled to himself, "Ugh, seriously? Can't catch a break." He set the plate of biscuits down and reluctantly dragged himself off the couch.
The knocks persisted, becoming more impatient with each passing second. "Alright, alright, I'm coming," John grumbled.
He reached the door and swung it open. What he saw on the other side caught him by surprise. Standing there was a tall figure, easily towering over him at six feet, wearing a long, dark cloak. John blinked in disbelief, unsure if he was still in the middle of a biscuit-induced daydream. "Who are you?" he asked.
The cloaked figure looked straight at John and declared in a grave tone, "I am the Dill Pickle Salesman, and I am in need of your assistance, John."
John's jaw dropped. "The Dill Pickle Salesman? Could it really be you?"
"Indeed I am" The figure answered. Despite John's excitement to meet the real Dill Pickle Salesman, he started to think that this could be a scam of some sort. "Where are your dill pickles you are selling then huh?" he asked with suspicion.
The Dill Pickle Salesman stammered "uhh... well.." John now new something was fishy. "I knew it, you're just a scammer!" Without hesitation, he reared back and delivered a swift punch to the cloaked figure's face, knocking the hood off. To his surprise, beneath the cloak stood a blonde little girl, no taller than 5 feet 3 inches. Her hair was short and messy.
"Who the hell are you, and why are you so much shorter now?" John has no idea what is going on at this point. The girl sighed and brushed her hair out of her face. "Okay, okay, you got me. I'm not actually the Dill Pickle Salesman. My name is Kookakoo, and I am a superhero. I know your secret identity as Octopus Man, and I was wondering if I could be your sidekick."
John thought about it for a moment. "How do you even know who I am?"
Kookakoo looks frantic "Forget about that, the plot needs to move forward somehow." she stated. John nodded "Fair enough" he responded.
John then shook his head as if he had just remembered something. "Anyway Kookakoo, do you even have any powers?" Kookakoo smiles and responds. "Yes I do, I have a rather unusual ability." She hesitated before continuing, "I can answer math questions, and if I get them correct, I can cause devastating explosions, but there's a catch - it only works if there are no horses nearby."
John shook his head, still confused by the whole situation. "Look, I don't know anything about math, explosives, or horses. I just wanted to enjoy my biscuits in peace. Maybe you should find someone else who is in need of a sidekick."
With that, John closed the door, leaving Kookakoo standing on his doorstep, but she wouldn't let her quest for a partner end just yet. Just as John was about to return to his biscuits, a yell came from the other side of the door, "1 + 1 = 2!"
Stolen from its rightful author, this tale is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.
Before he could react, the entire house instantly exploded into fire and debris. The force of the blast sent John tumbling to the ground.
Amidst the smoky aftermath, Kookakoo's voice cut through the haze, "Are you gonna take me seriously now?"
Despite the chaos and devastation around him, John slowly pulled himself up from the wreckage, brushing off debris as he did so. He looked at Kookakoo with a raised eyebrow, an air of nonchalance in his voice. "Nice try, loser. Explosions don't work on me. I'm Octopus Man."
Kookakoo looked mad. "Listen.. we need to work together because we need to save the world." John heard the words "save" and "world" and instantly transformed into Octopus Man. "WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? LET'S GO!" his entire personality changed.
Kookakoo smiled "YAY!" she screamed. As John and Kookakoo prepared to take on their new mission, John paused for a moment, "Wait a second," he said, "What are we saving the world from, exactly?"
Kookakoo replied with a sense of urgency, "From the giant little boy, of course!" John's face lit up with recognition. "Of course!" he exclaimed, as if the answer had been right in front of him all along.
Without wasting a moment, the duo shot into the sky, moving at the speed of light towards New York City, where the giant little boy was wreaking havoc. As they approached the giant little boy, it swatted the duo out of the sky with its massive hand. Octopus Man and Kookakoo fell, crashing into the concrete ground.
Octopus Man was somehow right behind the giant little boy despite just being thrown into the ground. He couldn't help but chuckle. "Haha, that was my trusty clone you smacked out of the sky you idiot!"
The giant little boy was now furious. He shot his fire breath at Octopus Man, but he simply caught the flames, swirling them into a fiery orb. With a mighty toss, he sent the flaming projectile hurtling back toward the giant little boy. The giant little boy shrieked in pain as the fireball engulfed him. He stumbled backward, weakened.
Kookakoo seized the opportunity, preparing to shout a math equation to trigger her explosive powers and finish the job. But just as she opened her mouth the giant little boy vomited forth a fully grown horse.
Kookakoo's eyes widened in horror as the horse appeared before her. She realized that the presence of the horse had rendered her powerless, unable to solve any equations or trigger her explosive abilities. The giant little boy, now regaining his strength, looked at Kookakoo and the horse with a wicked grin.
With their backs against the wall and the giant little boy seemingly unstoppable, Octopus Man knew he needed a last-ditch plan. He put two fingers in his mouth and let out a piercing whistle. The sound echoed through the chaos of their battle, and within moments, a remarkable figure appeared by his side.
Out of thin air, a dog named Catalina materialized. But Catalina was no ordinary dog; she possessed the incredible ability to shapeshift into various forms. In this dire moment, Octopus Man had a specific transformation in mind.
"Catalina, it's time to shine!" Octopus Man commanded, his voice filled with urgency.
Without hesitation, Catalina morphed into an eviction notice, a legal document complete with ominous wording and official seals. Octopus Man held it up high for the giant little boy to see.
The giant little boy's eyes widened as he read the notice. He realized he had been served an eviction notice from Earth itself. Panic overtook him, and he tried to flee the scene, but no mortal can escape the power of an eviction.
The giant little boy burst into flames, disintegrating before their eyes. The power of the eviction notice had proven to be an unstoppable force.
Kookakoo watched in awe as the giant little boy was erased from existence. Octopus Man turned to her.
"You did absolutely nothing, thanks a lot." he sarcastically stated.
Kookakoo pouted realizing a literal eviction notice did more than her.