The skinny young lady tore off her wet, white t-shirt and yanked off her jeans, all she was wearing was skimpy underwear now. The Overlord found this quite distracting, which was more than a little inconvenient considering the fact that a dragon had just bashed its head into the side wall of the tavern they were in.

"Please stop stripping!" shouted a drunk old man from behind his glasses. "If you keep stripping like that, we won't be able to see the dragon! It will be too distracting!"

The young lady stopped her frantic stripping and whirled around in surprise, looking at the drunk old man with an insulted expression on her face. She pointed her finger at him and shouted, "You're not my boyfriend! I have no boyfriend!"

"Do you have any idea how dangerous that dragon is?" asked the old man as he scrunched up his face in fear and embarrassment. "Plus... I could be your boyfriend if you wanted me to."

"Everyone shut the fuck up!" said the Overlord. "And listen to me, everyone, because I'm the fucking Overlord! You have to listen to me, and you have to pay attention! The dragon is going to kill me if you don't stop all this yelling and screaming and running around! You can't fight it with violence! You can only fight it with thought! The dragon is going to try to kill me if you don't use your minds instead of your bodies to kill it!"

The Overlord waved his axe around and shouted at everyone and everything in sight. It wasn't his glorious electrifying axe, mind you, because Isabelle still had that, but it was one of the many other axes he kept in his vast inventory.

The dragon roared again and this time blew fire through the glass window that gave access to the outside world. The Overlord leapt up onto a table and then shouted at everyone to form an orderly line. Everyone stared at him in confusion until he pointed at his head and then at his axe and then at himself repeatedly.

"I'm going to kill this dragon using my mind," he said again, more quietly this time.

People stared at one another with confused expressions on their faces until the near-naked lady who was definitely not a slut and did not have a boyfriend came up and whispered in their ears.

"The Overlord is talking right now," she said, leaning close to one man's ear so she could whisper in his ear while he tried not to think about groping her, "so you should probably listen."

Everyone nodded their heads in agreement and then stepped forward in lines behind the Overlord. He stood at the front of everyone's line while they stood behind him like some kind of weird line at a funeral or something incredibly awkward like that. The Overlord looked out at the dragon and saw that it was still roaring and breathing fire out of its huge mouth. It struck him as extremely odd that dragons had gigantic mouths like that, but it was definitely not an odd enough thing for him to stop talking so he could wonder about it for a few seconds.

"You see, the powers of the mind are extremely potent against a dragon. Far more potent than anyone might think. In fact, if you use your minds correctly against a dragon, you will be able to defeat it with less effort than would normally be required! In fact, one person might be enough to defeat it! But first you must know how powerful your minds are!"

He paused for a second to glance at the dragon. It looked terribly angry, and terribly ravenous, and it smelled terrible, too. It was also looking extremely pissed off right now. The Overlord quickly shoved his face back into the crowd's faces and shouted out in an excited voice:

"I am going to use my mind against that dragon right now! You all follow me! You all must follow me! You all must follow my orders! You all must think about killing that dragon! You all must think about killing that dragon right now!"

The drunk old man turned bright red with embarrassment as he stared at the near-naked lady who was definitely not a slut and did not have a boyfriend's cleavage, which was perky, inviting, and quite drenched in dampness. The people around him turned red with embarrassment as well because they were all focused on the woman's large chest which was pushing against her wet bra from all the alcohol and all the sweat she'd been pouring from her body. A few people glanced back at the dragon but found themselves immediately distracted by the near-naked lady who was definitely not a slut and did not have a boyfriend's legs which were spread apart from one another in such an oddly sensual manner. One person's eyes wandered down to her ass but quickly came back up to her face again when they saw that she was glaring at them angrily.

"Focus!" spat the Overlord. "Now is not the time for promiscuity! Promiscuity will lead to death! We must focus on the task in hand: slaying the dragon with our minds!"

The dragon turned its head, opened its huge jaws, and breathed a blast of fire towards the Overlord and the line of tavern patrons behind him.

[-69420 hp]

It stung like a bitch, but the Overlord was fine, even though he was actually still on fire and could feel the flames licking (but not charring) his skin. After all, the Overlord had 420694206942069 total hp, so losing 69420 hp didn't feel like a huge deal to him, and he could shrug it off. Sure, he was terrified of the fucking dragon. But at the same time, he was also filled with confidence; he knew he could handle anything that came his way. That was how powerful his mind was! Even dragons couldn't stop him from doing what he needed to do!

The Overlord looked around at everyone else in line. They were all staring at their feet or staring out into space or staring at the dragon which was still breathing fire towards them. They were all thinking about killing that dragon! But they were also visibly terrified. More than one of them had obviously pissed themself, and by the smell of it someone had even shat their pants. That was okay though because unlike everyone else, this Overlord wasn't worried about dying; he was only worried about living. Sure, he would prefer to live forever, but if he couldn't do that then there were other ways to accomplish it. This way he only had to spend a few seconds killing this dragon instead of spending forever trying to kill it. Plus, he was immortal, anyway.

And so he decided to start killing it right now. He thought about what people would say if they saw him kill a dragon with his mind and then thought about how much nicer it would be if people thought about killing dragons with their minds, and then he realized that if he used his axe on the dragon, he wouldn't be using his mind. So he thought about what would happen if he used his mind rather than his axe on this dragon. And then he thought about how good it would feel if nobody thought about killing dragons anymore and how much better everyone would feel. And so he decided to kill the dragon with his mind instead of his axe. Not because he couldn't use his axe; but because it would feel better this way. And so that's what he did: he used his mind on the dragon and killed it with his mind instead of his axe.

The Overlord thought 'Cast Mind Ray.'

A big, purple ray of light shot out from the Overlord's forehead and struck the dragon, causing it to flinch away from its attack and stumble backwards a few steps. Its huge head smashed further into the side of the inn, tearing the bar to bits and spilling lots of liquor everywhere. The dragon roared loudly, shook its head violently, and then tried to breathe another blast of fire towards the Overlord and the people behind him.

The Overlord thought 'Shield.'

A massive blue shield formed around him in an instant and blocked the incoming fire. It was so big that it blocked out most of the tavern's walls and ceiling as well as a good portion of everyone's faces, including several women who were currently trying to get up onto their boyfriends' shoulders so they could have sex with them despite their obvious discomfort and embarrassment. However, one woman managed to climb up onto her boyfriend's shoulders without anyone noticing her because she was wearing a towel which covered most of her body (and some parts that shouldn't have been covered) and so she climbed up onto her boyfriend's shoulders without anyone noticing that she'd climbed up onto him (and some parts that shouldn't have been climbed) and they started having sex under the towel.

The Overlord thought 'Double Shield.'

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The dragon tried to breathe fire again but its head was now stuck inside a huge blue shield which had formed around it from nowhere like a really cool shield cover from a video game or something.

The Overlord thought 'Summon Dwarf Companion.'

The shield held firm against both the dragon's breath and a large sword which had been thrown at it by a dwarf in armor who'd jumped out from behind a wall and swung his sword at the dragon's head. The shield held firm against both attacks for several seconds before finally buckling under the weight of the dragon's attack and shattering like kindling.

One of the dragon's fire blasts hit another guy in the face and he started screaming at the top of his lungs while trying to wipe away his forehead with a napkin that didn't really do anything except make him look more ridiculous than he already was because it just kept blowing right back onto his face when he tried to blow at it with his mouth like a regular person would try to blow things away with his mouth. The guy had obviously pissed himself too, because there was a big wet spot on his pants which was actually just piss because of course it was piss that had soaked its way through his pants like that.

One guy got hit by one of the dragon's fire blasts too but he didn't get burned; he got turned into stone instead because that's what happens when you're hit by fire and you're cursed with a genetic Beaubintian fire allergy; you end up turning into stone instead of getting burned to death like a normal person would have done in such a situation.

The Overlord went 'Summon Dwarf Companion!' again and this time two dwarves had come running out from behind a wall and they were holding axes which they were using to hit different parts of the dragon. Both axes were being used to hit different parts of the dragon simultaneously: one dwarf was hitting its head with his axe while the other dwarf was hitting its tail with his axe while both dwarves were hitting its underbelly with their axes at the same time.

The Overlord ignored all this because he was too busy focusing on using his mind on the dragon without using his mind on anything else or having to use things like axes or swords or shields or napkins or anything else at all ever again in his whole entire life, or even just for the rest of this one particular moment in time, or even just for right now, or even just for five seconds, or like maybe even just for one second but definitely not for one second longer than that, or even if he had to use his mind on something else for more than five seconds he would probably just think 'Fuck this shit' and then go back to using his mind on something completely different instead of giving up or actually doing what he'd been told to do in the first place, or maybe not, or maybe he'd actually listen for once, or maybe he'd just turn around right now and run away as fast as he could because there was no way in hell that he would ever kill this terrifying fucking dragon. The Overlord was so damn glad he had equipped his golden codpiece because if he hadn't then everyone, the dragon included, would see that he too had managed to piss himself.

Actually, the Overlord had pissed himself twice during this whole affair with the dragon mind-battle, and it was feeling very soggy down there in his crotch.

The Overlord thought 'De-piss Pants.' That spell was a mod he'd installed in his system, and it worked quite effectively.

And now for the dragon. Its huge, ugly head was still there, and the dwarves the Overlord had summoned had just poofed out of existence. The dwarves had probably disappeared early because they'd obviously pissed themselves as well, but they were probably the sort of dwarves who were used to pissing themselves anyway.

The Overlord thought 'De-Dragon.' It didn't work. He'd tried that spell before and it hadn't worked. It wouldn't work either this time either because this time the dragon was currently fucking him up the ass. Figuratively fucking him up the ass, that was. That was probably why he hadn't been able to use it before either; he'd been too busy concentrating on being fucked up the ass while also being scared of being eaten by dragons and stuff like that, and that would have been really hard to do while thinking 'Fuck this shit' and then running away as fast as he could because there was no way in hell that he would ever kill this terrifying fucking dragon.

The Overlord thought 'Kill Dragon.' That didn't work either.

"H-hey, mister, aren't yew gonna kill thuh dragon with yer mind or sumthin'?" asked the near-naked, sweaty skank in her trademark twang.

"Not yet... I'm trying... I'm trying... I'm trying... I'm not going to be able to do it... I'm too scared..."

"Yer not gonna be able ta do it?" said the near-naked, sweaty skank in her trademark twang.

The Overlord looked into the lady's eyes. They were remarkably feminine, and her cleavage sure was distracting. How the fuck was he supposed to kill a dragon when she was hear slutting up the place? It was all her fault. Fuking women. Who the fuck did she think she was, anyway? What right did she have? Didn't she know who he was, strutting around all sexily and skankily and whoreishly as she was? He was the goddamned Overlord! He could have her head on a pike in a heartbeat.

But how? The Overlord's eyes turned suddenly angry; they burned with anger so hot that it seemed as though the flames might scorch the room right down to its very foundations so that nothing would ever grow again but fire ever again for all eternity.

[-42069 hp]

Oh, no, that was just the dragon breathing fire at her and the Overlord. And she was taking a lot of damage! And then, she turned to stone! She must've had that genetic Beaubintian fire allergy! And now the Overlord would never get to have sex with her or see her tits or pussy or asshole or anything else! And it was all the dragon's fault! And then she turned back to normal just before she coughed up blood died anyway. What a bastard! And now that she'd turned back to normal, her cleavage had come back, so at least he could really stare at it all he wanted, but he could never act on what he saw unless he wanted to debase himself into necrophilia! She must've only had a mild fire allergy.

Still, the Overlord needed to focus on killing this fucking dragon. How could he kill it? Maybe he could summon something else. The only problem was, that woman had distracted his Overlordly mind with sexual fantasies to the point that he'd forgotten his summoning spells! What ever could he do?!

The Overlord thought 'Remember Summoning Spells.' Then he remembered how much they sucked when you forgot them so you couldn't use them and you just sat there in a puddle of your own piss while you waited for them to come back to you. And also he got annoyed about how many dwarf-centric summoning spells he knew. So then he thought 'Don't remember Summoning Spells.'

The dragon roared horribly. Its breath stank of brimstone and rotting flesh. The Overlord hated the smell of brimstone.

"Fuck you, you scaly bitch!" said the Overlord. He thought, 'De-Dragon' again, but nothing happened. And then, he noticed the system prompt.

[Insufficient mana]

Insufficient mana?! The Overlord had, what, 696969696969 mana in total? How was that not enough mana?! That was a ridiculous amount of mana, that had to be enough! Was 696969696969 seriously not enough mana to cast a de-dragon spell? And then he thought, 'Didn't have any mana before.' What horseshit! If you didn't have any mana before, how could you possibly have 6969696969 mana!? And then he realized it wasn't horseshit at all; it was just a bug in the game of life of being an Overlord with a system that prevented him from casting any spells unless his mana was at full capacity!

Fuck this shit! Fuck this shit! Fuck this shit! Fuck this shit! Fuck this shit! Fuck this shit! Fuck this shit!

The Overlord turned around and glared at all of the tavern dwellers behind him that hadn't yet either died or turned to stone.

"What the fuck is wrong with you all?! You aren't thinking about killing the dragon with your minds hard enough! Seriously, you all need to think about killing the dragon with your minds harder!"

One of the less-dead people said "That's because we're dead!"

"Oh my god, you're fucking dead too?" said the Overlord in surprise. "How did I not see your fucking bodies before?"

"It's because we're undead," said one of the less-dead people. "You cast a spell to summon us back as undead dwarves, remember?"

"Oh my god!" said the Overlord in surprise again. "So you were dead before we were even born!?"

"Wow," said another less-dead person in agreement. "No, that's not what happened, we died and then got summoned back as undead dwarves by you, but that would be crazy if that was what had happened."

"Yeah," said another less-dead person. "It would be totally crazy if you'd cast a spell on us to summon us back here as undead dwarves and then we died again and got summoned back as undead dwarves by you."

"No it wouldn't," said a third less-dead person. "Because if that was what happened, then we'd still be undead dwarves and you would still be alive and you wouldn't know about it because we're already dead. It would be like you'd already died and gotten summoned back as undead dwarves before we were even born!"

"Non of this makes any sense," said the Overlord. "But I think I may have summoned you all back as dwarves, and that would explain your beards and burnt flesh."

"And my mouth full of maggots," said a sexy woman with a mouth full of maggots.

"Yes, that too," said the Overlord. "Well, fuck it. Alright, you undead dwarves, rush forth and attack this dragon right away!"

"Yes sir, your Overlordliness!" said the sexy woman with a mouth full of maggots.

And so the undead dwarves charged, and the Overlord stood there, and he pissed his pants again.

"Wow, great bladder control you have there, Overlord," said Stelas' severed head from inside his velvet sack. "Do you need a diaper?"

"Shut the fuck up or I'll kick you from my party and kill you instantly," said the Overlord.

And then, they both watched the undead dwarves rush toward the gnashing jaws of the dragon. Who would win, was anyone's guess.

Suddenly, the Overlord gasped and reeled. A horrible pain seared through his intestines!

"Oh gods!" said the Overlord. "I feel like I'm going to die!!"