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Fiends For Hire [Anti-Hero Action/Slice of Life] (4,500+ Pages)
V3: Chapter 6 - No Time to Explain | Part 1.1 - Fun for All Ages

V3: Chapter 6 - No Time to Explain | Part 1.1 - Fun for All Ages

So good, I love this! Faster, faster, I need more! Nothing of a remotely intimate nature was happening as Ahvra sat alone in her lab, staring at the data from her blood experiments. This is so exciting! Who knew our blood had such properties?! I need to increase experiment output.

But the samples are running low… Hmm, who can I trick into giving me more blood? Well, I guess I should just start with my own. Can always replace it without someone whining. Ahvra drained herself of vial after vial of blood to the point that she could barely stand from light-headedness.

Admittedly, she should have taken a break there and gotten some food to help recover from the loss, but she was just too excited. Hmm? Did I add too much? In her fuguelike state, perhaps she had mixed up the measurements. She was used to sleep deprivation, and it’d never cause her to make an error, but this was a different level of delirium.

An alarm started to blare. One of the experiments was going out of control. It involved mixing her blood with an artificial viral strain to see how it would react. Oh Zjik, Ahvra’s eyes jumped from the data over to the machine that was running the experiment. Before she could do anything, there was an explosion, and fumes blasted out the lab.

◆◆◆

Mallea almost tripped on her walk to the general’s mansion. She’d been carrying a load of freshly washed linens that was tall enough to obstruct her view of the ground. Sadly, those linens were now thrown all over and would need to be washed once more. Oh well, it gave her more to do and occupy her time.

More importantly, she needed to figure out what she stumbled over, and then find whoever left it there to scold them. The item in question was a water pistol on the sidewalk next to a yellow raincoat. They looked familiar, but like most unimportant things, Mallea only had a faint recollection.

But then the coat wiggled, so she had to assume it was Pox hiding in people’s clothes again. Mallea nearly dropped the furless flesh blob after she fished it out of the coat. It was her worst fear: a baby.

Dark skinned with pink hair and caked in makeup—the little monster also reminded her of someone. What was her name again? Nahida? Nandor? Nichijou? Something like that. Were they related somehow? No, a relative of a Fiend wouldn’t have matching hair and eyes. Her next thought was Ahvra, but even that little gremlin wouldn’t be so cruel as to turn someone into a baby and then abandon them.

Mallea needed to figure this out, and more importantly, she needed to push the responsibility of this child onto someone else as soon as possible. Still, it would be unbecoming of her to leave a mess behind, so with baby in one hand, Mallea used the other to tidy up the linens and clothes and then took them back to her shed for now.

Not wanting to carry a naked baby around for any longer than she had to, Mallea quickly took a minute to whip up a yellow dress. Up until now, the child had been pretty restless and agitated, but its eyes sparkled at the sight of the clothing and eagerly waved her arms in the air for it to be put on. “Cute cute! Thank you, mam!” So the baby at least knew some words, and it knew basic courtesy, how odd.

On the what-felt-like-forever walk over to the main building, the baby spent the entire time tugging on and playing with Mallea’s hair. The sooner she could dispose of the pest, the better. “Deborah, do you know whose baby this is?” Mallea asked as soon as she entered the lobby.

But she was only met with more confusion. “Very sorry about this. I ask that you please come back another time once we’ve sorted this out. Or we’ll be in touch,” Deborah was quickly rushing prospective clients out the door with panic in her eyes. They’d been getting more of them lately, clients who wanted to meet in person with more sensitive or difficult to explain requests.

“Can I ask why you just shooed away potential clients?” There was a stench of tomfoolery about, but that didn’t excuse unprofessionalism.

“I, err, uhh… It would just be easier to show you.” Deborah led Mallea to one of the nearby meeting rooms. For whatever reason, Deborah had locked the door, perhaps to contain whatever was inside for the meantime.

Sitting on one of the couches was a boy in an unspeakably oversized suit. He was calm, but had a quizzical look on his face, studying the room and the world around him. The boy looked to be about 3 or 4 years old, certainly older than the baby next to him on the couch that looked to be only about 1 or 2.

The baby also had a suit around them, but their body had slipped through the neck hole entirely and they were sitting in the nude. Their very blatant orange hair told Mallea that this had to be Chorus. But before any gender-defining glances could be made, a small trunk appeared behind them. The baby did a backwards somersault into the trunk and popped out a moment later. They were now dressed in very-expensive-looking baby clothes, and the words ‘Lil Fiend’ were embroidered on the top in jewels.

Deborah confirmed that the boy in question was Roque, not that it wasn’t obvious just by looking at him. “I need to check on the others,” Mallea tried to keep calm but her heart was pounding with worry. She then plopped the assumed baby Niloy into Deborah’s arms.

“You stay here and watch these ones. Maybe try to convert the main room into a daycare for now. I suspect there will be more. Please check the restaurant as well. Some of the residents may be there. If Hank and Vazzle are unaffected, I’m sure they’d be more than happy to assist you. I’ll bring over any other afflicted I find.”

Mallea quickly exited out of the back of the building, rushing over to the general’s mansion. She needed to find Drim and make sure he was alright. Everything else came second, but she still had a duty to fulfill to lead the staff through this crisis.

“Miss Mallea? How can I be of assistance?” Crucion answered the phone before the first ring even finished. He was probably a little surprised since she had only ever texted him.

“Guess you’re not a baby then. That’s good. I need your help, Crucion.”

“You do?!” Crucion was likely a bit over ecstatic since Mallea had never actually asked for his help, only given him orders.

“Yes, where are you?”

“Umm, sweeping up the tunnels like you told me.” Mallea should have guessed as much. Despite him being a little clumsy, Crucion was a very dedicated and orderly employee—honestly the most responsible and reliable one of all those under her management.

“Alright, abandon that for now. We’re in crisis mode. It seems possibly all the Fiend members have been turned into children. I can’t speak for the Lessers since I haven’t run into one yet, but assume they’ve been altered as well. I’m heading to the mansion to investigate. Please head to the resident homes and then the dorms and do a check on all the tenants. If they’re babies, please bring them to the large room in the headquarters. Keep me updated.”

Mallea ended the call there. She could have gone deeper into planning, but that would be enough for now. They’d still need someone to check out the gym and the entirety of the campus both above and below ground. Anywhere a person could stand, there could be a baby, at least until everyone was accounted for.

A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation.

She was ready to burst through the front doors of the mansion, but was stopped before she could even reach the entrance. There was an old man Mallea had never seen before sitting down on the front steps. It looked like he’d stopped for a rest, but there was no life in his eyes. They were blood red, so she knew he was a Lesser. His now baggier flashy clothes and extremely long golden blonde hair gave her a good guess.

“Gaston?”

“Huh?” The old man looked up at her and then got angry. “Name’s Gatrim Foilepe, and don’t you forget it!” He pulled out his rapier and jabbed it towards her face but then his anger subsided a second later. The rapier tip was poked into the ground and he rested his hands on the hilt.

“What are you doing here, Gallium? Are you looking for someone?” Mallea tried to be as courteous as possible despite the chaotic situation.

“Trying to find the restaurant.” He was back to looking lifeless. “I’m so hungry. Feels like I haven’t eaten in decades. Can’t seem to remember quite where it is, though.” Mallea pointed him in the right direction, and then he thanked her and shuffled on his way, using his rapier as a cane.

Still wanting to burst into the mansion, Mallea couldn’t help but send a follow-up text to the staff, warning that there may be old people as well. She instructed them to leave them be if they were safe and coherent enough, but to otherwise bring them to the headquarters building as well.

Once inside, Mallea rushed straight to Drim’s room, but he was nowhere in sight. On the off-chance he may be in one of the other rooms, Mallea checked them all. Phon and Xard’s rooms were completely vacant, but there was a lot of screaming and an entertaining sight when Mallea entered the last room on the floor.

A tiny Kada was sprinting around the bedroom, tears streaming down her face as she screamed at the top of her lungs. Chasing her was the robot known as Sir Cleaningsworth. Mallea had allowed it to exist under the condition that it never left her room.

‘Naked baby targeted. Dressing protocol activated. Naked baby targeted. Dressing protocol activated.’ the robot repeated endlessly as it stumbled after the frightened child. As tempted as Mallea was to leave Kada to her fate, she still stepped in and disabled the robot using a nearby remote.

It then took all of Mallea’s inner-strength to not shake off the blithering child when Kada ran over and hugged her leg. Not wanting another naked baby to carry around, Mallea dug into Kada’s dresser and altered one of the one-piece swimsuits she found. While dressing the small girl, Mallea finally paid enough attention to realize that Kada’s skin was much paler than usual. It was back to its old pasty self from before Kada had become a Fiend, but the altered hair and eye color still remained.

“Huh, you’re not a baby, Rachel,” Mallea found Rusa sitting normally in her room in front of her large wall of monitors.

“No, why would I be?” The elderly Rusa smiled kindly in return but with a hint of confusion. “I know your memory is bad Mallea, but even you should know my rebirth isn’t for a few more weeks.”

“Oh, I see now. That’s Kada, isn’t it?” Rusa deduced once the small child that had been hiding behind Mallea’s legs poked out its head. “Is everyone like this?”

“All the Fiends I’ve found so far, well except for you,” Mallea explained. “I ran into one Lesser who was an old man, but all humans seem to be unaffected so far.”

“Hmm, hmm, hmm,” Rusa processed for a moment. “I must be exempt because I don’t have any time.”

“So you’re saying Avaline is behind this after all?” Mallea pressed for confirmation.

“Almost undoubtedly,” Rusa was pretty confident. “But this seems a bit bigger than the scope of her Curse.”

“Well, she’ll have to wait for now. We need to make sure everyone is safe first, so I’ll keep looking around. Is it alright if I leave this one with you? We’re gathering them all up in the events room of Headquarters.”

“Sure, I’d be happy to,” Rusa gave an eager smile like a grandmother whose grandchildren had just come to visit. “Come little one, I have snacks.” She pulled a cookie out of one of the bags sitting next to her viewing pillow.

Kada immediately rushed over, needing no further temptation—truly a childlike innocence that would get her in trouble with someone possessing impure motives. Mallea needed to make sure none of these ignorant children made it out into the world until this was fixed. It made her all that more worried for Drim.

Down in their private training facility, Mallea found Xard. Unlike the others, he was still properly clothed. Xard’s combat suit had automatically adjusted itself to his size, even popping off some of the shock-enhancing plates so that it could fit appropriately.

However, there still had been an incident in the transformation. The outfit was hooked into one of the machines and Xard was dangling in the air. That didn’t stop him from working out, or whatever he was doing, as he continued to punch the machine endlessly with all of his pitiful baby strength.

Baby Xard seemed quite frustrated with his situation and didn’t stop attacking even after he was freed. Mallea had to carry him like a kitten, dangling him from his suit at the back of his neck to keep him from trying to punch her. She toted him around like that while she explored the entire underground. After finding nothing of interest, Mallea took him to the headquarters building to join the others.

“You wanna go, old man?!”

“Who are you calling old? Check a mirror, hag.”

There was a commotion in the events room already, which was well into being converted into a daycare. Some of the babies were even drawing on the walls. It seemed all the resident Fiend babies had been brought over from their homes, but there was still no sign of Drim.

A corner of the room had been dedicated to the elderly Lessers, where comfortable furniture and a large TV had been brought in. Even though there were far more Lessers living on the compound, the corner only had a few occupants. Crucion had taken her advice and left them be for the most part.

“Oh, stop fighting you two, it’s so unseemly. We must get along.”

Nachi and Tize were at each other’s wrinkled throats. Their weapons had been confiscated, so they were jabbing each other with an umbrella and a stapler. Of all people, it was surprisingly Kaizu who was trying to stop the fighting. There was a very odd serene kindness and empathy to her that the usual Kaizu was missing entirely.

The room was certainly chaos, but it was manageable chaos. Deborah was clearly exhausted, but Hank and Vazzle seemed to be having a great time playing with the kids and feeding them snacks. It would have to do until Drim was found. Mallea checked his profile once more to confirm his location, and he was still listed as being at the compound.

She ran all over, every pathway, every building, but there was still no damn sign of him. That was when it hit her. Drim wasn’t the earliest riser, and there was still a lot of time left in the morning. This meant that there was a good chance that Drim had been asleep when this all occurred. Given his unusual sleeping habits, he was probably out of his room, somewhere high up.

Mallea ran back over to the mansion and climbed onto the roof. Drim wasn’t there, but it was a good enough vantage point. Just outside the northern gate was a black leafless tree that she’d never seen before.

“Garuu garuu!” Pox was scuttling around the base of the tree with his arms up in the air like he was trying to catch something. As expected, at the very top branch was a terrified Baby Drim clinging on for dear life with tears streaming down his face. Mallea tried calling to him as the Koala Fox had been doing, but there wasn’t any way of cutting through the child’s fear.

“Alright, Lox, I’m gonna go get him,” Mallea reassured the creature. Scaling a tree should be child’s play for her, but this wasn’t an ordinary tree to begin with. The tree itself was more like a cluster of skeletal branches than a traditional tree, all of them rigid with sharp points. It would be hard for even the most nimble athlete to climb. On top of that, the tree was constantly shifting. It seemed Drim was subconsciously using his Curse to effect it in his panicked state.

Mallea pulled out one of her knives and started scaling. The tree immediately reacted, sending branches her way like it was trying to fend her off. She used her knife to slice away points as she clambered up as fast as she could.

It only took her a few seconds to reach the boy and she grabbed him without warning. The tree then went into overdrive, sending every branch it could after her. But Mallea wasn’t going to give it any further chance to strike while she had Drim in hand. She jumped down, using the knife to dig into the tree and slow her progress.

The moment her feet touched the ground, the tree vanished entirely. Pox jumped into Mallea’s arms too and the three of them shared a very long group-hug.