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Fiends For Hire [Anti-Hero Action/Slice of Life] (4,500+ Pages)
V3: Chapter 14 - The Daily Lives of (Less) Wanted Murderers | Gatrim & Kaizu (1)

V3: Chapter 14 - The Daily Lives of (Less) Wanted Murderers | Gatrim & Kaizu (1)

“So what did you do this time?” Gatrim visited Kaizu in her holding cell.

“Killed someone I wasn’t given permission to kill,” she didn’t even look up from her computer screen as she clicked and typed without stopping. Her holding cell was less like a prison and more like an office cubicle. While it was secured underground and had a door locked from the outside, the room was even nicer than a lot of apartments.

She had a bed with a sleeping bag, a bathroom with full privacy, and a desk with a computer. Simple, but still not the worst life. Meals were brought promptly, and she was allowed visitors. Honestly, it was still better working conditions than when she was an office drone.

“So, the same thing as every other time,” Gatrim smiled smugly at her. “Your obsession is standing in the way of your own greatness, my confidant!”

“When did we level up to confidants?” Kaizu was barely humoring him, mostly replying on auto-pilot.

“Wuh? We’ve been on so many missions together!” He reminded her. “What did you think we were this whole time?!”

“Coworkers.”

“Coworkers… well, I suppose I can’t argue the technicality,” Gatrim slicked back his hair with woe. “How unfortunate. I had a way to get you out of here early and permission for a mission to kill a bad guy. But I was saving that favor for a confidant.”

Kaizu’s keyboard finally stopped clicking. “I’m listening.”

“I am… on a quest for revenge!” Gatrim spouted like an actor performing in a play. Kaizu’s keyboard immediately started clacking again, having lost interest.

“Wait, wait, wait, fine!” he insisted and got to the point. “I’m going after the bastard who killed one of my sisters, okay?!” The click-clacking stopped once more, and he finally had her full attention. “My sister worked for a politician who was trying to make a name for herself. So she sent her after a mobster, a real piece of zjik, to assassinate him, but she was never heard from again.”

“Now, revenge is technically off limits in my family. We serve our master’s whims until our dying breath. Whatever happens to one of our own family members is not our concern. The only way we’d be allowed to go and get revenge is if our own master ordered it, but we’d also have no precedent for telling them without reason.”

“Thankfully, I am not beholden to these laws since I have struck out on my own. And what better way to prove my growth, to prove my abilities, than to take down someone even one of my sisters couldn’t?!”

“You don’t actually sound that upset by her death,” Kaizu found his reasons lacking.

“That’s true, I’ll admit,” Gatrim knew better than to try and lie to the psychopath whose sole passion in life was digging into the lies and deception of others. “She was quite a bit older than I, so I barely have any memory of her. Even then, she was only around for family gatherings. I hadn’t seen her for quite some time when she was reported dead a few years ago.”

“Then your reasoning is purely pride then?” she got to the root of it.

“Deserved pride!” he insisted. “I will find this bastard and strike him down before he even knows what hit him!”

“So what do you need me for?” Kaizu still hadn’t figured that part out yet.

“Well, obviously, to be my companion during this harrowing trial!” Gatrim held out his hand, inviting her on his journey.

But she spun back to her desk and resumed her work. “I’m only good at killing people, and you said that you’re going to kill this person yourself. So what would you need me for?” He didn’t have an immediate answer. “I bet you want me there to pick up your slack when you fail. To bail you out when you get in trouble. To kill them when you hesitate.”

“No! That’s… perfectly accurate,” Gatrim slumped against the wall. “Of course I want to rely on you, Kaizu. You’re amazing. You never hold back, and you always do what you think is right, even if you end up in here. I want you to come with me, because you’re the only one who won’t judge me if I can’t go through with it. You’ll just do what has to be done. And because you’re my friend.”

“Guhhhh, fine,” she pushed away from the desk. “I’ll go with you, because if I don’t, you’ll just mope in here all day. So how are you planning to get me out of here? Don’t tell me that you’re dumb enough to try a prison break. Because the moment I step out that door, my body will lock up automatically.”

“Looks like you’re speaking from experience,” Gatrim grinned. “Well let me ask you first, how many more records do you have to go through?”

Stolen content warning: this content belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences.

In lieu of a time commitment for her sentence, and because she was still an employee who needed to be productive, Kaizu was tasked with administrative work. Specifically, she had to perform background checks on individuals suspected, but not yet proven to be criminals. Who better to sniff it out than a woman who was wholly obsessed with being right about it? When she’d completed her workload, her restrictions were automatically removed and she was allowed to walk out.

The suspects in question would come to them through various means. A good amount, but not the majority, came from job requests—either individuals or groups they were tasked with dealing with or those who had posted a job with suspicious motives. It gave them a much better idea of what jobs they should take.

Most of the rest came from law enforcement servers that they were hacked into—those suspected of crimes where the police hadn’t been able to find hard evidence. Once Kaizu confirmed it the best she could, they’d send the data over to the police for free along with any uncombed evidence she’d found. It was all part of Chorus’ grand scheme to put them in a more positive light with the various governments around the world.

“4,817,” Kaizu answered as if it wasn’t a big deal.

“Holy zjik, you’ll be down here for weeks! Just who exactly did you kill?!”

“No one important,” she had absolutely no remorse or care for who she’d killed. “Apparently, it’s not who I kill but how many I’ve killed. Each time I get sent down here, the amount increases.”

“Tch, in no time you’ll be down here the rest of your life,” Gatrim grimaced at the idea. “Well, I can’t wait that long, so we’ll have to go with my backup plan after all. In case you have forgotten, I have not one, not two, but three favors that the Fiends For Hire owe me for being a monthly winner!”

“Oh yeah…” she had a vague recollection. “You did the gauntlet. I thought you did it just to suck up to them.”

“I did it to prove I’m the best at whatever I do!” he quickly refuted. “Surely everyone must be struck with admiration since I was the best employee while also proving I’m the most good and evil! Of course they were for different months, but so far, I’m the only person to win them all!”

“Well, I’ll at least admit that the month where you did the most jobs was impressive,” Kaizu offered a sparse bit of kindness. "A work ethic of that level is something that even I admire. The other two months, though… Creative? Sure. But I don’t think I’d call them impressive or admirable on any other level.”

“How absurd!” Gatrim couldn’t take the criticism. “I spent an entire month volunteering at homeless shelters and food banks. What isn’t admirable about that?!”

“Good deeds performed solely for selfish purposes lose some of their luster,” she attacked his morals. “I can’t fault you for what you did, but rather why you did it. Would you have ever done either if there wasn’t a reward at the end?”

“Sure, I would have…” his words sounded unconvincing. “When I’m at the top and have nowhere higher to climb. Of course I’d use all my free time to grace others with my assistance. Certainly…”

“At least you got a delightful nickname out of it,” Kaizu grinned devilishly.

“I really hope that doesn’t stick,” Gatrim’s face looked like it was melting with despair. “I am The Memory! That will be the name that everyone adores!”

“Well you’re certainly in their memory, Poverty Prince,” she couldn’t help herself. Kaizu had admittedly fallen short on her relationships with the other members, but at least Gatrim was always good for a laugh.

“And I broke the world record for most criminal score gained in a month—over 15,000—even blasting past the Drazahs! How can you deny that it was impressive?!” he moved on to her next criticism.

“It really is quite a shame that the score got reduced so much,” she mourned the wasted potential. “You lucked out that they did it two days after the competition ended, or all your effort would have been for nothing. I guess they couldn’t stomach a serial pebble-chucker being the most wanted criminal in the world.”

“Hey! The competition was the most criminal score, not how bad the crime was! Don’t blame me for taking advantage of the rules.”

“Well, you did your research and figured out how to optimize your score. Can’t fault you there,” Kaizu admitted. “You’d make a great serial killer.” He wasn’t sure about that praise. “But such potential wasted on breaking windows. So much energy for that little result. It’s just sad.”

Gatrim had gone on his own mini-world tour over the course of a month. It only covered the North-east quadrant of the continent, but that was all he could manage on his own during the timeframe. He still completed jobs so that no one could complain, but during his travels, he committed a lot of crimes.

Well, one single crime in particular. He’d go to a politician’s house and throw a single pebble through a window. He had his Crime Card attached to it so there was no doubt who’d been behind it. Gatrim would also vandalize only one politician’s house per county—the highest ranking one he could find—so that the police would be forced to count each incident as a separate crime.

Even though it was usually minor damage, roughly a few hundred Commons per incident, the criminal score toll was massive. For each he’d gained trespassing and property damage—small charges that added up quickly—but occasionally, he’d hit the jackpot with various degrees of attempted and alleged assault, depending how influential and pissed-off the politician was.

Unfortunately, the fruits of his labor were struck down by the Central Peace. They intervened with his hyperinflated score, and his 15,000 was reduced by over 90% to 1,300. He didn’t really care too much about that part, since he’d already achieved his goal from it, but being the most wanted criminal in the world for a few days did certainly inflate his ego.

“So you’re sure my body won’t flop on the ground when I go through?” Kaizu still hesitated at the threshold of the open door.

“Yes, yes, here, you can look at the text from Phon if you want!” Gatrim waved his phone at her. “Your sentence has been commuted. Well, conditionally. If you go off the rails while you’re on this mission with me, you’ll receive double work and I’ll be forced to help you since I’m vouching for you. So don’t let me down, alright?!”

“Right…” Kaizu did a skip through the doorway—as if that would help—and let out a huge sigh of relief when she was left standing on her feet.