“And now on to the noon headlines!” Corein Gedring announced to the camera. It was time for the most important broadcast of the day, and they had just received a breaking report that had gotten her fired up. “This just in, we have confirmed reports that the four main members of the Fiends For Hire, including both Drim and Phon Drazah, have been officially pronounced dead after—”
“Jeez, whatever happened to fact checking?” Phon sneered as she appeared on the news desk, sitting on the front edge of it; several papers sent flying by her displacement. She then turned to Gedring and smiled smugly, “So much for your journalistic integrity. You really will read whatever nonsense you’re handed—the CP’s favorite lapdog.”
Clint Crihound, who was also at the news desk, immediately hid under it, cowering in fear. Surprisingly, Gedring wasn’t even looking at Phon and had ignored her provocation entirely. Instead, she was glaring at the three other Fiends standing off to the side, just off camera. Specifically, she was staring at Kada. “Kada Susten, I’ll mawhging kill you!” Gedring screeched as she leapt over the desk, then bolted at Kada, attempting to tackle her.
Phon smirked briefly at the ensuing catfight and then returned her gaze to the cameras. “As you can see, any rumors of our untimely deaths are completely unfounded. Chalk it up to another wild misunderstanding and failure by the CP, but who’s honestly surprised there? You got played, zjikheads. Anyways, this isn’t really about that. We have an important announcement!”
“A little over three weeks from now, on October 6th, we will be holding an open recruitment at our compound. Any and all Fiends and Lessers are invited and encouraged to come. We’re expanding our operation, and are looking for talented and motivated individuals to join us, but you’re welcome to come even if you don’t want to do what we do.”
“From now on, the Fiends For Hire is also a refuge for any Fiend who has lost their place in the world and wants to live an honest life. We’ll find something for you to do, a new passion, as long as you’re willing to try. We will also make sure that anyone who joins us, regardless of position, is offered full salary and benefits, and will never want for anything as long as they earn it.”
“That said, just because you show up, it doesn’t mean you’ll be invited to stay. We’re going to be selective, but as open minded as possible. If either party decides that isn’t a good fit, you’ll be asked to leave. Don’t let that be a deterrent, though. Even if you’re not accepted, all travel expenses will be compensated, so you have nothing to lose but a bit of time. If nothing else, I can guarantee it’ll be interesting, and you’ll get to meet several others like you.”
Drim coughed from the corner, reminding Phon of something she’d neglected. She pulled out a prewritten paper from her pocket and began to read. “As a warning, I am legally obligated to inform you that by visiting and applying to the Fiends For Hire that you are subjecting yourself to the standard hiring practices, anti-discrimination laws, and legal recourses of the country of Segrevide. The Fiends For Hire are also not responsible for any physical or emotional trauma you may endure during your application and employment, and we are not fiscally responsible for the damage or loss of any personal property.”
If you spot this story on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.
“Welp, that about covers it. We’ll let you get back to your regularly scheduled biased and censored news once Kada stops sitting on your news anchor. Oh! One last thing. If any CP mawhgsacks are thinking of any plans to mess with our open house, I want you to remember that we now know the location of your headquarters. If you don’t want the whole world to know, you won’t try anything annoying. Don’t mess with us at our house and we won’t mess with you at yours. Bye!”
◆◆◆
The Fiends left the news station, and Phon teleported them to a private airfield outside the city limits. Mallea was waiting for them with the helicopter since she'd been on standby in Prosper the past two days. She had also checked that The Tourist was still hidden on her way, to make sure that the CP hadn’t absconded with it after the ordeal. She was unable to retrieve it herself due to the immense weight.
Mallea hugged Drim upon seeing him, but quickly gave Xard a side-eye for the duration. As if he could see it himself, Drim immediately ordered, “Please get along with Xard, Mallea.”
“As you wish,” was her only reply. Pox also took this opportunity to leap out of the helicopter that he’d snuck onto and reclaim his favorite spot on the back of Drim’s head. It was hard to take Mallea’s claim that she didn’t know Pox was there at face value since he was wearing a new propeller hat she’d fashioned for him.
On the flight back, and before they dropped off Kada to pick up the Tourist, they finally had time to relax and shared the details of their escapades with each other. Once that wrapped up, they began discussing what needed to be done before October 6th. That date hadn’t been chosen arbitrarily, and had been given considerable thought.
First and most importantly, the facilities weren’t finished yet. It was pointless to have new recruits if they didn’t have anywhere to stay. Ideally, they would have been done by now, and had originally been estimated to be completed in mid-Sextaugber, but their spur-of-the-moment musings and goals had pushed all of that back. Nathym assured them they would be completed by October, if not sooner, as long as they didn’t do anything else crazy.
Second, there were a few important dates that were near the end of the month. More important to the others than Drim himself, his birthday was on the 29th, and they wanted to celebrate it properly and more intimately than if they were dealing with their expansion plans.
Also at the end of the month would be Feyj’s third rebirth. The group thought it best to wait until there was no longer a potentially crying baby around to disturb the orientation process. It would also give them a few days to get an idea of Feyjrusa’s new personality, whatever it may be. Mallea had already come up with dozens of excuses as to why she would be unavailable to tend to Feyj during his rebirth process.
Lastly, before they would be really ready to move their operation to a larger scale, they would need to hire some support staff.