I had to remind Io that there might be people watching and that she should stay covered while bathing in the river. I had to stop her from going full dragon mode. I was supposed to get out of this relaxed but I just was even more stressed. At least I was sandless. I wanted to head over to the Adventurers Association to fix lodging but I realized that Io might not be an adventurer. Hey Io, are you an adventurer?
“I’m a dragon assassin!” Yes, I know but are you registered at the Adventurers Association?
“Isn't that just for humans?” Uhh, good point, I don't think so but I can see why you would think that, alright a normal hotel is gonna be.
“What with that human association?” They provide lodging for adventurers for cheap but since you’re not one you can't get a room there unless you share a room with me but that's absolutely not happening so we need to go to a hotel.
“Why not? It's gonna be fun! Like a sleepover party! We can tell each other stories!” I don't want to sacrifice the little peace and quiet I have left…
“Aww, maybe next time.” There is no next time! We found the place where the auctions were going to be held while looking for a hotel. My energy was continuously getting drained by Io and I reached the hotel completely exhausted.
2… rooms without sand, please…
“Hey dude are you alright? You look exhausted.” I got a look of pity. Please… no more dragons or sand…
“Hang on! We will get you and your girlfriend a room” I grabbed the receptionist by his sleeve.
Noo! I want a room far away from her! I said as I pointed at Io.
“Aww come on Agnis, we had a fun day!” Save me, please… They finally got the message and got separate rooms for me and Io. I dove into bed and went to sleep.
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A lot of noise. Can I never have some peace and quiet? I turned around and pulled the sheets over my head. Someone was pounding on my door and I heard people trying to stop whoever was doing that. I curled up under the sheets and hoped I would soon wake up from this nightmare. It soon got silent. It was almost noon but I didn't feel like getting up. I had 20 minutes of quiet before I heard people screaming outside.
Ugh, what is it this time?
Suddenly a red dragon appeared in front of my window, busted down the wall and grabbed me. “Oh, you're still alive! I thought you died!” Please let this be a dream…
“I saw a meat stall not too far from here!” I got carried to the plaza in the centre of the city where Io landed and turned back into her human form and dragged me toward a stall she saw. She was of course naked and everyone either was curious or scared. I had lost all energy to resist. I need to file a complaint toward Esher. I’m going to make it as long and hard to read as possible and threaten to write more of them until the problem named ‘Io’ got addressed. Io somehow found the same merchant as yesterday and demanded he hand over all his meat again. He looked at me and this time in pity as he saw I lost all energy to resist.
“Hey, I can give you a discount you know?” It’s fine, here just take the money, if possible, send someone to save me… Io continued walking around naked and dragging me and the cart of meat around.
Please, wear some clothes, you're attracting even more attention than you normally do…
“They will just get destroyed anyways! It’s better to go without…” She chomped down on more meat and spat fire at the street rats trying to steal some.
I might need to visit Healerguy I might have picked up a very persistent and dangerous curse…
“Hey! I’m not a curse! I’m a dragon!”
Suddenly a lot of people ran at us and started dressing Io in fancy clothes. “Welcome dragon goddess!” Oh really?! Noo, I don't want to deal with this…
“Yes! Hahaha I am a dragon! But I can also be your goddess!” Some guys started worshipping Io while others seemed to be afraid of her.
“Is this guy bothering you dragon goddess?” They pointed at me.
“No! He’s my best friend you can call him the ‘Nice smell god’” I don't want such a lame name and I'm not a god!
“Oh, I see you're her head priest! Show us the way!” the newly formed cult seemed to be convinced that I was some sort of important figure.
No guys, please were just normal… we’re not normal, are we…. Ahhh! Guys, we’re not a goddess or a head priest! Were just tourists!
“So humble! Truly worthy of a head priest! Let's bring them to the temple!” Wait? You guys have a temple? Hey! Don't touch me!
“Guys look, the priest has reached enlightenment! Look at how light he is!” The crowd cheered as they picked me up and abducted me. Hey come on that pun isn't even funny! Put me down!
I got carried to a dilapidated temple against my will. Io seemed to enjoy the attention. I really just wanted to sleep and wake up when this was all over. Why did this have to happen to me? I showed her goodwill by hanging out with her and this happens…
“Dragon goddess show us your true form!” No guys wait! Listen when she does that her clothes…
Io transformed, roared, and breathed fire into the air. The cultists dropped to their knees. They said some weird stuff and then looked at me.
What?
“Show us your great power head priest!” I really wished that I learned how to use [Sleep]... Who even brainwashed them?
“Yeh Agnis! I mean head priest! Show them your power!” And I got even more annoyed at Io enabling them. I’m sorry, I am not a head priest, I’m just a mere mortal, I don't want you guys to misunderstand. I swear someone is getting punched if they start saying that I'm too humble.
“Don't bother with him my followers, he’s quite shy!” I really feel that Io needs that punch but it's not like she’s gonna feel it… I circulated nature energy through my body to combat this seemingly never-ending headache. It would be nice if I woke up from this nightmare right about now… I waited. Nothing. I seem to be wide awake. So, reality can be stranger than fiction?
“Oh, dragon goddess can you get rid of the bandits that have been plaguing this area lately?”
“Sure!” Io hummed and breathed fire. “Done!”
“Thank you, dragon goddess!” The cultists started to bow to her.
I started to circulate more and more nature energy because the headache just kept getting worse, you can't just breathe fire and tell them the bandits are gone! She kept doing similar things.
“Look! The head priest is showing his power!” I realized that circulating this much nature energy made plants grow around me and since we were in a desert it could be seen as a miracle… No guys, listen, this is not what you think there is this thing called nature ener…
“Long live the dragon goddess and her head priest!” the cultists all cheered and more and more people started to join in. Where did I go wrong? What could I have done differently? Maybe I’m indeed cursed. Io was loving it. I left a shadow clone behind and sneaked away. I needed a quiet place to think. Getting out of this mess isn't going to be easy. Io is the worst assassin ever! There was a lot of gossip on the streets about the appearance of the dragon goddess and her head priest. I was seriously wondering why so many people believed in that bullshit.
“Look! A miracle!” I looked around and I noticed that I never reduced the circulating nature energy. I was in stealth but I left a path of growing plants behind. My headache got worse but I dropped the circulation to a level where this wouldn't happen and retraced my steps and went for another route. The Adventurer’s Association came in sight and I went inside, bought a drink and sat at the table with my hands in my hair.
How am I going to get out of this mess? Maybe I should put in a request for adventurers to save me.
"Already having a bad day? What interesting situation have you gotten yourself into?" I turned around and saw the sexy lady of yesterday, this time with more clothes but still sexy. Oh, it's you, my friend is… a pain in the ass and I’m trying to come up with a plan to get out of this…
She sat next to me. "What could possibly bother a man of your calibre?" Calibre? I'm not that impressive… Do you know what the deal is with this dragon goddess thing?
"It's an old folklore from the time the dragons were more like guardians. And I just found out you're a C-rank adventurer specialized in water magic, which is quite impressive and valuable in the desert." A right that… but there's no point if I can't stop my crazy friend…
A random guy stormed into the Adventurer’s Association. "The Dragon Goddess and her high priest have appeared!" The adventurers who were not native to here seemed confused but those who were became interested and some left the building to check it out.
The sexy lady seemed interested too. "Is this coincidence or do you know something about this? The more I talk to you the more interesting you become." Why does everyone make me out to be more than I am but well the dragon goddess, that would be my friend… and apparently, I’m the high priest… I downed my drink and ordered another one.
"Oh really? So, are you a dragon too? I heard rumors about a dragon appearing in this city but I didn't believe it." She asked as she leaned in. I need to focus, her eyes are up there.
My focus returned and I recalled her question as she probably wants an answer. Oh no I’m just a human.
"I see, you’re certainly the most interesting human I’ve met in a while." You sound like you’re not a human yourself.
The narrative has been taken without authorization; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.
"I wish I wasn’t but I'm unfortunately a human." What’s the problem with that?
"I value my beauty a lot, I’m envious of the races that look young for almost forever." I took another sip. Well immortality has a price in exchange for being immortal, which is a questionable term but let’s use it for simplicity. Immortal beings mostly have tasks that can't be completed in a short lifespan and are too dangerous and uncomfortable for those that aren't immortal. At least that's what I think but what do I know, I’m just a human.
"Hmm that is an interesting perspective, I’m interested, why is Immortal a questionable term?" You would count dragons or elves as immortal right?
"I would yes." You do know that both elves and dragons have been killed in the past by harsh circumstances or even by humans?
"I do, yes but I think what we humans did is unacceptable. Such beautiful creatures should be looked up to and we should strive to be more like them and not kill them. I'm ashamed to be a human…" Please don’t become like dragons, you are pleasant to talk to, dragons are not. But back to my point, immortal is a questionable term because they can die. Sure, not of old age but why do none of those races have members that are old by their race's standards? This could apply to all other 'Immortal' races, if immortality was such a big deal why is the world ruled by the humans and not a group of immortal races? The combined life experience of those could easily invalidate the humans massive number advantage.
"Hmm that Is a very good point, I had never considered that. So, what you’re trying to say is that something is killing those races of which the humans are unaware of and immortality is more of a trait that’s preventing them from going extinct?" Something like that yes. With great power comes great responsibility, if you were immortal, you might not have been able to live your life as you did. I don’t know your past but you seem to be well off now, maybe it was hard, maybe it was easy but if you were an immortal race there is a high chance you would be targeted by whatever is killing the immortal races, there are just too few of them nowadays… if they were truly immortal, they would be everywhere and the humans would worship them like they are doing now to Io. Aaah shit I still need to solve this problem!
"You seem to be very wise for your age, I can sense that you had a rough youth. I can’t relate unfortunately, I have been quite lucky to have been born beautiful and in a good family, I had to work to get here but I wouldn't say it’s something special. " She grabbed my hand. "Is there a possibility I could meet your dragon friend?" Ugh, sure why not I need to stop her from doing dragon things anyways I’m sorry I have a bad memory what was your name again?
"Thalia Resha, 18 years old, B-rank Grumpy Blowfish and I'm single.“
I laughed. Grumpy Blowfish hahaha!
"Stop! I can't help it that my role is called like that! I am trying to make a name for myself and possibly change the role to my adventurer's name." And what would that be?
"Alluring Desertflower" Good luck, Grumpy Blowfish is hard to beat though hahaha!
"Hmpf, you will see, I will succeed, why don't you have an adventurer's name?" Dunno never bothered with it.
"You do know that it’s either a name people know you by or a custom skill that makes an impact, right? Rarely do the adventurers choose it themselves, I was very lucky that they started calling me Alluring Desertflower. I love the name!" Well, I haven't done much so it's unsurprising that I don't have one yet. As long as I don't get a lame name, I'm fine.
"How about Lost Bathrunner or Dragon Priest?" Stop, that's not funny! Those are all accidents!
Thalia laughed. "It has been a while since I had this much fun talking to a man, most are just interested in my body or my money. Say do you have a girlfriend?" I am sorry, I do think that you’re sexy and pleasant to talk to but I’m extremely busy and from what I know about girlfriends, is that they need a lot of time investment, something I can't do.
"Hmm an interesting answer, you do seem busy and in trouble constantly." Please don’t remind me… I still have to figure out this mess…
Another random guy barged into the Adventurer’s Association. "There! Found him! Guys the high priest is here! Let’s bring him to the goddess!" Ahh shit my peace and quiet is over…
"Do you mind if I tag along?" If you can handle headaches well, sure why not, I have nothing to lose. A group of natives came in and easily carried me away. I decided that resistance was futile.
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Io seemed to be happy to see me. "Ah there you are Agnis! I thought that you got kidnapped!" I did… but not in a way you think….
Io looked at Thalia. "Whoa that chick is pretty who is she? Your friend?" Kinda.
"Does she want to become the head priestess?" Hourai have mercy on my soul… The cult of dragon worshippers now saw Thalia as the head priestess.
The cultists gathered around Thalia, which made her uncomfortable. "Huh what is going on?!" Thalia, meet my pain in the ass friend Io. This is what an immortal being is like… more than often a pain in the ass. Hey Io isn't it time to stop fooling around? We were supposed to do something, remember?
"What do you mean fooling around? I'm a goddess!" She spat fire into the air and the cult got excited and bowed. You don’t want to be a god, trust me they are more trouble than you are, although maybe you might fit right in… But you’re not a god so stop turning this city into a cult!
"But look! The people love me! They can’t live without me!" Uhm, they did just fine before you showed up…
"Ahh, emotional damage! Impressive as always being able to hurt a dragon." You make no sense… tell them you’re not a goddess. Please…
"Ugh fine but you better buy me some ice cream!" Why do I… you know what fine! Even better I will make you some ice cream, just dissolve this cult!
"Ooh can I have some too?" Thalia seems to be an opportunist... Yeah, sure why not…
"Dear cult members! I am not a goddess!" I facepalmed and started to circulate nature energy again to deal with this headache. As expected, the crowd didn't buy it. Hey Thalia this might be a very weird and uncomfortable question but could you get me a spare set of your clothes? This chick here will be naked when she returns to her human form…
"Sure, sweetheart. " She took out a purple box and pulled out a set of clothes. Is that… a dimensional storage box? Aren’t those super expensive?
"They are but it's unbecoming of a beautiful Desertflower to walk around and carry my heavy stuff and didn't I tell you that I was rich?" Uhh, I get told that I have a bad memory. Hey, Io how about turning into your human form?! Thalia, can you dress her up?
"Sure! Coming through! Make way for the head priestess! You can look but can't touch!" Thalia parted the cult as they all made sure to not touch her.
Io returned to her human form and Thalia created an opaque water veil and I assumed that she started to dress Io. A water user in the desert, beautiful, and a dancer, I can see how she is successful here.
"Look! I am just a dragon! Not a goddess!" Io appeared from behind the veil in sexy clothing. I assume this was to be expected after asking Thalia for help.
"Ooh, how stunning!"
"Her human form is just as beautiful!" Aaand it didn't work. Hey Thalia, are you trying to sabotage me?
"I'm sorry but I don't have ugly clothes!" How about the in between? Normal clothing?
Thalia looked at me as if I was speaking Hourai. Forget it… Hey cultists!
"Head priest, we would appreciate it if you stopped calling us cultists…" Shut up! What would it take to convince you that she's not the dragon goddess and that we aren't priests? The cult talked under each other and started holding debates. I patiently waited for an hour for them to finish. Io had procured another cart of meat and was eating. Thalia was belly dancing and it was soothing my mood a bit. Unfortunately for her I need a Golden Angel for this and not a Grumpy Blowfish to get soothed completely.
"The council…" Cult "The council has decided that if she fails the trial in the head temple south to here that she is a false goddess and needs to be killed!" And how about we don't do the killing?
"Impossible!" So, you decide randomly that someone is a goddess to the point she starts to believe it but if she finally wants to prove she isn't, she dies?
"Well if you say it like that, you make us seem like assholes." So, you will reconsider?
"Impossible!"
"Agnis, calm down, how about this dance?" I tried to not flip a lid. Thalia tried to help but I'm not sure it was helping. How about this then? You stop worshiping Io and forget this all happened.
"Forgetting and abandoning our goddess is blasphemy!" I formed a fist but relaxed. Fine… if this is the path you've chosen, bring us to the temple.
"Are you sure? She will fail if she's not a goddess, you can't just send your friend to die!" Thalia had taken out a fan. She was fanning me. I don't get hot but maybe she was expecting to blow my headache away.
Don't worry she won't die. I put my hands on Thalia's shoulders.
You are sweet and alluring, I don't want you to get tangled in this mess, we don't live here so we won't be stuck with the consequences but you will. Please stay behind.
"Wh… what are you going to do?" Look, you might think I'm a good guy but I'm not. If I could destroy the world I would probably do so if someone pissed me off enough. Don't associate with people like me.
"But…" You have a dream to turn your role into Alluring Desertflower right? Don't let a random guy that you just met ruin that for you. You can't blemish your reputation.
The cultists picked me up and carried Io and me toward the temple. I left a sad Thalia behind. I told the cultists to not touch Thalia or face the dragon goddess' wrath so they left her alone. The only upside of this situation was that I was getting carried so I didn't get sand everywhere. Even though the cultists were annoying, at least the trip to this temple was enjoyable. It all stopped when we arrived. It wasn't a dungeon, just an old building.
"Legend says that the desert will turn into fertile land when the dragon goddess finishes her ritual! Please commence!"
Hey cultists there is a jungle right around the corner why don't you just go live where the food grows and not stay in this sandbox…
"You want us to sacrifice our culture? Our heritage, our property for that reason?"
Culture: sand,
Heritage: heat and poverty,
Property: barren wasteland and more sand for lush fertile jungle, right around the corner by the way, rain and water and plenty to eat, right around the corner by the way and did I mention there is a lot of food and more importantly, no sand, just around the corner by the way.
"Wow Agnis, I never saw it like that, living in the desert is indeed stupid when there is a jungle next to them. I will never understand humans…" Io shook her head at the lunacy of these cultists.
"Just do the test and turn the desert into a utopia!" This sounds awfully similar to the story about that Dimsha. It's not sealed here though. Maybe they think it is and have the location wrong? I looked around and there was only sand as far as the eye could see with the jungle starting several kilometres behind us. I can see why they messed up the location, how can you find something if everything looks the same…
Io looked at me as if looking for answers on how to turn the desert into fertile land but I had no clue.
Io walked up to a random cultist. "So how do I do that? Does your cult have instructions?"
"Use your divine power!"
Io used fire [Dragonbreath] on the temple and turned it into a molten heap. Nothing happened though… I sent shadow clones out in stealth to set up traps. The cult was stunned for a bit and nothing happened. The only sound was the wind and the pile of molten stone bubbling.
"Did I do it right?" For me you did, for them… not so sure…
Some cultists dropped to their knees in despair, realizing their goddess was fake. "Kill them!"
As expected, they all stormed at us, shooting magic at us ready to kill. My shadow clones sprung the trap and held the wires I was controlling. Most of the cultists ran into them and got chopped into pieces. This counts as self-defense, right?! Io was taking attacks unsure what to do but she didn't seem to be taking a lot of damage.
Last warning, stop this madness, or else you all die! Nobody listened. Io started to attack back, punching and slamming the attackers to the ground.
The area turned into a blood-soaked sandy hell after 10 minutes.
"Ugh, this is one of the things I don't like about humans, they ruined this nice dress." Io tried to save the dress but it seems permanently ruined. I will have to apologize to Thalia. If I remember that is.
I connected to the leyline energy and cleaned her up with water. I had no speck of blood on me but Io looked like she committed murder, which she technically did.
"How are we going to clean this up…" I connected to the underground leyline current and tried something new. It would be [Surface flip] but with the sand. If successful, I can send this mess 10 meters underground. I made the correct movements and got met with a lot of resistance but I succeeded. As usual, earth leyline makes me uselessly tired.
Stupid sand…