It was a beautiful summer morning. The city was stunning as ever. I was sitting on the balcony with Nilah. I had thrown out a wire with some bait attached. I didn’t have a fishing rod but this would work. I would do things the 9t way now. Hunting down these shitty gods one by one will take too long. We need to get them together and wipe them all out in one go.
5 gods are confirmed dead. Hablena was helping us out so that leaves 4. What would get them together? They all want to take over the dimension. What if I trick them that a specific item will ensure that they can claim dominion over this dimension? I glanced at Nilah and got an idea.
Ooh. I have a great plan!
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I completed my plan 4 days later. I needed a remote area so unfortunately, I’m back in the desert. I didn’t tell anyone about my plan because they would surely be opposed to it. I made the maximum amount of shadow clones I could, I also created various illusions of regular-looking people.
Now go out in the world and spread the rumor that a dimension-conquering artifact lies here!
They scattered and went to spread the word. I wrote some primal runes on the dungeon that I ‘Borrowed’ to make it impossible to get out, mostly to protect it from divine activity. The puzzle to enter this dungeon was quite easy.
I went inside and the dungeon closed behind me and I proudly looked at my work. I had to forego all the treasure this original dungeon had as I had no time for it.
I had indiscriminately blasted everything. It seems ancient technology isn’t invincible. I had then remodeled the interior of this dungeon to suit my taste. It has traps, triple clones, Nilah clones, illusions, and other nasty obstacles. Some barrier-lifting skills were needed, reflecting my time spent in Boshi town, alternatively, they could kill some realistic illusions of the root guardians.
The next floor had a trial where they needed to save a golem from imprisonment to pass. I made the golem look like Bunai but of course, it was a callback to the Event Horizon. Of course, with all its temporal and gravity bullshit and the guardians Cygnus and Geminga. This one took the longest to make.
The third floor would be an elemental challenge to commemorate everything I went through to learn Dragonvein. The oceanic part is going to fuck them up so bad!
It will end with a stealth and assassination mission.
The fourth floor will be a smaller version of the Labyrinth of the Breathless.
The fifth floor will just be a wave of enemies. All the strange bullshit I’ve fought. I wonder how they will like the Demon Whale or the Shadow behemoth.
The last floor will be the end boss, which will be me but I will pretend to lose. They will then claim the artifact that can conquer the world! But unbeknownst to them, the item would be a disguised Nilah! She will pretend to be a normal artifact for a bit and hit them with [Kryokym] which is the sign for phase 2 where I will ‘Revive’ and the both of us will kick their asses.
It had only taken me 1 day to repurpose this dungeon, another day to get the gravity and temporal shit fixed on floor 2 and the last 2 days were to make this plan god-proof. They can’t cheat their way into this.
All that was needed was for them to find this Nightmare difficulty dungeon. I sat down in my fancy booby-trapped boss room. Boss rooms normally don’t have traps but I didn’t care. I will make the fight as unfair as possible and stack everything against them. It was themed after my house in Alledra. I should use my illusions like this more often.
The setup for [Bossmusic] was ready. It would automatically play when someone entered the boss room.
Come foolish gods. Struggle with all you might! Hmm that didn’t come out as I hoped to. I need to ask Greg for some more edgy lines.
I practiced cool boss lines while I waited for the first fish to bite. The first waves would probably be curious adventurers.
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The first group arrived 2 days later. They looked quite exhausted. exhausted from what? I only put a simple puzzle on the entrance. It was even in Kaledonian. the dungeon was located in an emty patch of desert though, maybe that tired them out?
They started quite boring. There was an Iron Wall, a Golden Angel, 2 Hawkeyes and an Unstoppable Beast. Not much damage in that team but these types of encounters have the focus on staying alive and not deafeating enemies, not a bad composition for dungeon crawling. Now they found the dungeon, let's see how well they can crawl.
They walked around quite confused through Boshi Town and were at a loss on what to do.
Come on it’s not that hard! Look there is a large pink barrier covering the city!
Was the first floor already too difficult? I was quite bored. The adventurers had spent 2 hours asking the illusions of Boshi town inhabitants if there was anything wrong with this place. Nobody in Boshi town thought anything strange was going on.
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I yawned as they still had to make an attempt to leave the city.
Another 2 hours had passed and they got together and were having a strategy meeting. They didn’t know what the objective of this floor was.
Come on! I didn’t make it this hard! I want to see them fail trying to break the barrier!
Day 1: the adventurers finally decided to leave the town and got blocked by the barrier. I wanted to be excited but it took them a whole day to find out. I wasn't impressed. I wanted to mess with them but the difficulty might be too high for them if it took them a day to find out what to do.
But wait! Another team had entered the dungeon! These didn’t have a Golden Angel but some Toxic Donkeys and Hawkeyes. They found party 1 quite fast and met up. Bla bla more boring meetings but now they were coming into action! The Hawkeyes and Toxic Donkeys spread out to find out how to leave. Finally, some action.
A toxic Donkey found the PB cave and the PB fucked him up.
That is strange. The PB was supposed to be an easy miniboss. Luckily, they have a Golden Angel.
They attacked the PB at the end of day 1 and beat it. 12v1 was a bit unfair but the PB was designed to lose. They could now enter the PB cave.
But to go for the spirit sisters root first, eh? They sure were in for a surprise. I didn’t do anything unfair like making illusions of actual spirits. If the team was strong enough, they could defeat the spirit sisters.
Day 4: They were still stuck at the spirit sisters. I was getting tired of them so I kicked them out of the dungeon. Come back when you get stronger!
Day 7: A new team arrived. These adventurers looked very tough. The word about the entrance puzzle was probably out so anyone could easily enter now. I snacked on some rabbit and observed how this team instantly headed for the PB cave. They slew the PB and set up camp in front of the PB cave.
Why though? It’s still morning. Don’t they want to progress? The answer came an hour later when another tough-looking party entered. The first party comprised mainly of Iron Walls and Unstoppable Beasts, while this one had a Golden Angel, and some other roles I couldn’t instantly figure out.
They met up, chatted a bit, and went to the Spirit sisters. It was a 3-hour battle. They defeated Gubani but they couldn’t get through Narwhani’s defenses so they made a temporary retreat.
I did make this dungeon to wear out gods but damn humans are weak. They’re having major problems on floor 1. They did choose one of the hardest bosses on floor 1 but since they’re in the first timeline, everything is still easy. They were struggling with opponents Raishin, Greg and I beat when we were 12 years old though...
They went at it after an hour break and defeated Narwhani. They were overjoyed, as if they beat the whole dungeon. Did they know that this wasn’t really an achievement? They destroyed the first root and completed te first timeline! They were back in Boshi Town and had no clue what was going on. They decided to go back to the PB cave but it was empty now.
Day 8: They found the passage to go to the underground city. So, the Magma root is up next.
They couldn’t cross the magma pool… they sure were ill-prepared. They went back to the surface and another Toxic Donkey team entered. They were now a team of 18. This Toxic Donkey team must be one that tries to retrieve other teams. But they’re stuck here again. They located and scouted out the Molerock cave. Let’s see how well they can rap and breakdance!
Day 9: I’m upset. They killed Molerock and destroyed his house! I’m not sure what I was expecting. They were in the third time loop and shit started to go down. The shades were attacking them and some team members got isolated in a separate space with shades. They needed to survive a certain amount of time to break out of these isolated separate spaces. 4 adventurers died to it.
That’s what they get for killing Molerock!
Day 10: all the adventurers were dead and the dungeon reset to the very first timeline. I guess that’s what would have happened if Raishin, Greg, Ted, and I were humans. Nilah had gotten bored from staying in her disguised form and I had made a [Frost ball] for her to play with. I was getting bored myself too. Maybe this wasn’t such a great idea after all. All the adventurers had died so the information about the bosses has been lost.
Do I have to endure more slow humans?
Day 13: 4 non-human teams entered. They looked promising. The only problem was that they seemed to be competing against each other.
Day 14: 2 teams have died. They had gotten to the 2nd time-loop and half of them had died in the isolated space. The remaining 2 teams had decided to band together. They had also killed Molerock. Molerock and the spirit sisters have been defeated and they were looking for the next guardian.
Oh, their Golden Angel got trapped in an isolated space. That’s a game over. Or So I thought. He survived the full 20 minutes and got reunited with his teammates. That was very impressive.
Day 15: They found the magma pool and turned back.
Come on guys! This is just floor 1! Be ashamed!
They found the cave to the Paul and Paula cave at the end of the day.
Day 16: Paul is kicking their ass… they can’t do much against his speed. I now understood why it was so easy to get to B-rank. The state of the adventurers is pitiful. Paul assassinated the Golden Angel and the team was now without a healer. What a clownfiesta. I kicked them out. They should spread the knowledge so that the next team isn’t this boring.
I made some ice cream and Nilah and I enjoyed it. I started to wonder if these gods don’t care for a dimension-conquering artifact. Maybe, the rumors were too vague, gods are quite stupid after all. But I didn’t want to make it sound like it’s obviously fake. I made it sound like it was a Dimsha, just like the one that produced water.
Wait do they even know what a Dimsha is? What a blunder! I will wait till day 20 and then spread some better rumors.