Novels2Search
1% Life's Real (a 1% Lifesteal parody)
Have YOU Ever Felt Like a Duct Tape Mummy?

Have YOU Ever Felt Like a Duct Tape Mummy?

Veronica faced the most stressful, most important moment of her twenty-six years of life.

What Prime Vestige to take into her soul. Before her more than a handful of Prime Vestiges rested in their enchanted glass boxes, unable to speak. Otherwise, it would be a cacophony.

She saved for more than a decade for this moment and all the money she had in the bank wouldn't buy half of any of the Primes in front of her. And yet, they were offered for something as immaterial as loyalty and service. She could do loyalty and service. Heck, she would marry the handsome bodyguard for a Prime Vestige. Though she believed her boss would be less than happy with the arrangement. These two had some energy going on between them.

She was digressing again. If Veronica had to imagine herself in another reality show to cope with the stress and excitement, she would blow a gasket and push some serious daisies.

Any of these Prime Vestiges would have her drooling. Even the ones Amanda cruelly labeled as duds. Veronica remembered to breathe.

"It's okay. Take your time," Amanda encouraged.

Veronica looked at the teenager who turned her life upside down. She returned a wry smile, giggled nervously, and then looked back at the Prime Vestiges arrayed in front of her.

Decision paralysis wrapped around her like a blanket. No, like a gigantic spool of duct tape had turned her into a mummy. A duct tape mummy.

"We can go by elimination," Robert suggested. "We pick the ones you like the least, and remove them from the list."

Veronica looked at the bodyguard. Their eyes met and she knew he was a kindred spirit. He saw compassion and comprehension. There was someone who knew about anxiety, depression, and the crushing pressure of the world. But she also saw a guiding light. Then she broke eye contact because three seconds had passed and any longer would risk drawing the ire of her boss.

"Thank you, Mr. Blaze," Veronica blurted.

"Please call me Robert outside of formal situations," He requested with a smile.

Amanda looked between them two and smirked. She said nothing but Veronica understood "everything" (no, she didn't).

"The fire and Ice might be good but I don't want it," Veronica said. Robert slid it into an empty spot on the table.

"Good. Baby steps!" Amanda said with a bit more emphasis than she should.

"I find the sonic vibrations lovely," Veronica said, holding back the "but". "Making music with my talent alone? I'd like that talent but I think there's better options."

The author's content has been appropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.

"I understand it," Robert said. "My late parents bought me a Poet Prime."

Amanda rubbed Robert's arm, offering a lovely smile.

"My condolences," Veronica reacted empathetically.

"Thank you," he replied with a knot in his throat.

There. She could see the pain hiding inside him. Despite all his power – Veronica doubted Samson would trust their princess' security to someone weak – he had a soft, damaged, and beautiful interior. Someone who understood the human condition, someone who hit rock bottom and dragged himself out of it. She admired that.

"Move the sonic Prime out," Veronica decided. Then she seized that momentum. "The teleportation power is also something I'd like to have. It is very good for both combat and daily life. And I could sell Space essence, it is always in high demand."

Amanda let out a faint grunt.

"I don't need it. Remove it from the list. Next, you can remove the energy absorption prime. We couldn't find out how much of the incoming damage would be absorbed. It could be one percent, it could be half of it. And I don't want to get hit regardless."

"Fair enough." Robert slid the box away.

"We have a mortal recruit program, where we train some prospective youngsters who can't afford a Prime," Amanda revealed. "They wait for someone to sponsor them into the world of Archhumans. I'm going to build a platoon of Holy Archs with these. We will find out."

"The clone goes away too," Veronica said. "Having a second me would be nice, but she would be her own person."

"Yeah, I totally understand," Amanda said. "I don't think I would agree with myself most of the time. What if my clone decides to do something scandalous and outrageous, dragging my reputation through the mud?"

Veronica nodded. Robert slid the box away and voiced his opinion.

"I think we should give this one to someone who's very self-centered. Someone who would coordinate with themselves well."

"True," Amanda agreed.

"Remove the lightning speedster too," Veronica said. "It's a good talent and Lightning is good at offense but no. I made up my mind. I'll take the haste Prime. Time essence is very good, very sought after, and accelerated actions and reflexes are as good as the speedster, with more potential."

"There we go!" Amanda cheered as she picked up the box and placed it in Veronica's hands. "All yours. It's your sign-in bonus."

Veronica drew a sharp breath. She wanted to believe this gift didn't come with strings attached but she knew better. She owed Amanda Samson millions of dollars. Damn, she had no idea of the price this Prime would sell for.

"Won't you take it now?" Amanda asked, confused.

"I think we should not let the ATA trader know we are so interested in this one. They might jack up the prices."

Amanda grinned and giggled. "No such chance. I already know the prices. While you were sorting things, I checked the prices and bought these primes on the tablet. It's a done deal. Now, seize your power."

*

*

Robert was surprised. There was that line again. But wasn't Amanda gifting power, through the Prime Vestige? Perhaps not. What she was gifting Veronica with was the opportunity. He had to admit this philosophical talk got confusing.

Veronica opened the box and grabbed the Prime. "I accept you into my soul!" She declared. Her voice broke and rose an octave at the "my", though.

"Very well!" The Prime said. The golden ball broke down into a golden mist that rushed to cover Veronica's body, seeping into her skin. She drew a big breath, clutching her chair's armrests. A couple of minutes later, she slumped.

"It's done!" Amanda cheered.

Veronica nodded. "Yes, it's done. I feel exhausted, though."