That Time I Got Sent to Another World Where All of the Girls Are Super Hot and Super Into Me Because I Am Super Strong and Have Very Powerful Abilities that God Gave to Me Because Me and Them Were Friends When I Was in Grade School and God Is Actually A Loli Who is Also in Love with Me Because I Am A Super Epic Person Who Will Defeat The Demon Lord Who Threatens The Entire World but the Demon Lord Actually is in Love With Me and the Demon Lord is a Super Hot Busty Babe Who is Actually Just Trying to Get My Attention Because I Have a Cellphone That Can Contact the Internet and Can Get Anything Shipped To Me Within 2 Days But I Barely Need It Because I Am Actually the Most Strongest Guy Alive Because I Have Super Strong Powers Like Being Able to Lift Your Mom Really Easily Which is Nearly Impossible Because Your Mom is So Fat But is Actually A Secret Anime Busty Babe Who is Really into Me Because I Am Super Cool and Better Than Your Dad Because He is Super Lame Which I Am Not:

Vol 2. Chapter 2 - That time I was reincarnated into another world and investigated a giant skull

We parked the cart on the side of the road, and I tossed a couple gold coins into the meter. I looked up at the giant skull, my chuuni senses tingling with delight. I wondered if it was occupied. In most games, a giant skull meant an enemy base, but sometimes they were empty or had treasure instead. If it wasn't occupied, or if the current denizens were killable, I might want to take this giant skull for myself!

Bonbon looked up hesitantly at the giant skull, her ears twitching. "Why do I get the feeling this is going to involve more fighting?"

"It's a giant skull, wan," Wanda replied simply, tucking the bottle of vodka into a sling on her belt.

Bonbon gave me a concerned look. "You're... not going to make me fight everything on my own again, right?"

I shook my head. "That was just a test. Now that I know you can fight, you can spend more time on the sidelines not fighting and commenting on my fights."

"I... uh... okay." Bonbon accepted my wisdom at face value, shaking her head. She looked down at her sundress. "Well, I should probably at least put on something a little more battle-ready, just in case."

Put on something? Wait, that meant she would be taking something off! And by something, I meant clothes! But if she did that, then I might see... see something really good!

"Great idea. You can probably get changed behind that," I suggested, gesturing to a knee-high shrub on the side of the road.

She glanced over at it before shooting me disbelieving look, probably surprised and appreciative of how gentlemanly I was being.

"It's fine," she replied. "I can just change here."

My jaw dropped. H-huh? She was just going to change right in front of me?! I covered my eyes in shock, blushing madly. "W-wait, if you do that, y-you."

"There we go, all done."

Huh?

I opened my eyes again, to find that Bonbon had changed back into her chef uniform, with her chef coat, short flat chef's cap, and apron. Huh? I had just covered my eyes, and while I didn't have [Mental Stopwatch], I was pretty sure I hadn't had them covered for more than a half hour. How had she changed so quickly?

"How did you change so quickly?" I asked, feeling confused, but mostly disappointed, like an otter being handed unstackable cups.

"It's one of my [Skills]," she explained. "[Secret P-] I mean... uh..." She started stammering, turning consecutively brighter shades of red.

One of her skills? Curious, I decided to appraise her using my appraisal skill, [Appraisal (but secretly infinite knowledge)]:

Name: Bonbon A. Petit

Active Title: [Enterprising Cook]

Faction: King Presley's Elvish Nation

Race: Elf

Level: 6

EXP: 730/750

Skill Points: 75

Gold Stars: 5

Gacha Coins: 0

HP: 800/800

MP: 200/200

SP: 170/170

FP: 2/2

Attributes:

Stranth: 18

Dexterity: 31

Swoleness: 19

Magic: 35

Karma: 120

Mojo: 15

Luck: 28

Skills:

[Walking Mastery - Lvl 4] [Hustling Basics - Lvl 9] [Cooking Mastery - Lvl 7] [Burning Resistance - Lvl 4] [Slashing Resistance - Lvl 3] [Pain Resistance - Lvl 4] [Food Critic Basics] [Enterprising Chef] [Kitchen Hands] [Knife Supremacy] [Speak with Animals] [Speak with Plants] [Stealth] [Improved Dexterity] [Beautiful - Lvl 10] [Double Chop] [Conga Line Basics - Lvl 1] [Aura (Food Preservation)] [Elf Ears] [Elf Eyes] [Immortal] [Magic Conscription] [Culinary Magic] [Magic Perception] [Magic Casting] [Divine Cookery] [Princess] [Secret Princess] [Fated]

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Titles:

[Cook] [Enterprising Cook] [Scion of the Kitchen] [Trendsetter] [Chosen of Flavos] [Princess] [Rogue] [Elf]

Culinary Artes:

[Short Order Chef]

[Crunch Time]

[Precision Serving]

[Unbreakable Apron]

[Acquire Taste]

Trendsetter Artes:

[Mill Rumors]

Spells:

[Create Food]

[Unburn]

[Bestow Flavor: (Spicy)]

[Bestow Flavor: (Sour)]

[Bestow Flavor: (Good)]

[Fistful of Spice]

[Purify Food and Drink]

[Freeze]

Hmm... one of her skills, huh? I had to admit, she had a few skills that seemed a little suspicious. But, I think I'd figured it out. I grinned a smile at the stammering elf and held up one finger, cocking it slightly in her direction.

"Don't worry," I told her. "I've seen your skills, so I'm pretty sure I can guess."

She blinked at me, freezing suddenly. "You've... seen my skills? As in, all of them?" She glanced at Wanda, who was busy licking some paper squares for some reason. Maybe she was going to mail a letter. "So you... you mean you know that I'm..."

"Say no more," I told her, giving a conspiratorial but also subtly flirtatious wink with both eyes. "Your secret is safe with me."

"Hiro-san," she said urgently, moving closer to me and lowering her voice. "You can't tell anybody, alright? It's super important."

I flashed her a reassuring thumbs up. "Don't worry, I won't tell a soul."

She calmed down a bit, shooting another wary look at Wanda. I chuckled to myself as she strapped on her knife roll. I wasn't sure what she was so worried about. It was pretty obvious that she used [Stealth] to change her clothes, since I didn't see it. [Stealth] wasn't anything she needed to be embarrassed about, plenty of people had it, probably!

But, I guess I could keep it a secret for now. At least until I needed there to be some misunderstanding or minor betrayal to stir up drama arbitrarily once the plot started to dry up and get repetitive.

Wanda hopped down from the cart, swaying slightly. She looked ready for battle as well, with a fierce look on her face. Her brow was set, her teeth were bared, and her pupils were dilating wildly. We were ready for anything.

"Let's rock," I said out loud, to nobody in particular.

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"So, how'd last night go?" Jerry asked, leaning the hood of his dark purple robe to the side to grin at the other man on guard duty with him.

Malcolm brought his disposable skull chalice to his lips, grunting as he took another drink of the mulled wine. He let out a long sigh, tilting his head back and watching the clouds roll by.

"Well... You know how it is."

"Oof," Jerry oofed. "That bad, huh?"

Malcolm grunted again, and Jerry continued, scratching his cheek with the point of his standard-issue sacrificial Kris.

"I thought you were hitting it off pretty good. What happened?"

Malcolm shrugged, shaking his head. "It started out fine. I took her to that new place that just opened up, that [Italian] place."

"Any good?"

"Yeah, the food was great. But we got talking, and she seemed like she was having a good time, then all of the sudden she just kinda... Got all quiet." He sighed and shook his head slowly, replaying the events in his head and leveling up [Cringe Resistance] for some reason.

"I tried lightening the mood, but then she remembered she forgot to water her plants, and took off."

Jerry frowned, looking over at his friend as he took another sip.

"Well, what'd you say?"

"Yeah, that's fine. You gotta take care of your plants after all."

"No, before that."

Malcolm shifted uncomfortably. "Well... She asked what I do for a living."

Jerry groaned. "Mal..."

"I wanted to be honest!" Malcolm protested, thrusting his arms out in a shrug. "A good relationship is based on trust."

"Mal..."

"Worshipping the Dark One is part of who I am! If she can't accept that part of me, then..." he trailed off, taking another drink.

"Sure, man, but on the first date? You're just gonna scare her off."

Malcolm grimaced, lifting his cup to his lips. A sudden rustling from the bushes startled both the guards.

----------------------------------------

I watched the guards from my hiding spot, on top of the giant skull. I had trouble deciding whether to sneak up on them and kill them, or to strike a cool pose and announce myself, so I decided to do both.

The shorter of the two guards was looking over at the bushes that Wanda was hiding in. He set his cool skull chalice down, stalking over to the bushes.

"Hang on a sec," the other guard said, looking around in confusion. "Something's... Something's off?"

The shorter guard stopped mid-slink and stood up. "What's off?"

"I... I dunno. Just... Feels like- like something changed. Maybe-"

I smiled, leaping down to take advantage of their confusion. I activated [Evil Eye: Killing] to kill them both instantly and silently, then activated all of my magic skills at once to cast [Meteor Storm] to confirm the kill.

I landed in the scorching crater, striking a victory pose. Bonbon popped out of the bushes, looking in quiet awe at the crater.

"That seems a little excessive for a couple of cultists, doesn't it?"

"The guilty pay the price," I muttered in what I hoped was a badass way, sheathing my katana, which I hadn't used, but had pulled out so that I could sheath it when I was done.

I looked at the spot where the guards were few seconds ago. So they were cultists, huh? This place must be some kind of cult, then.

I clenched my fist in anticipation. Cults were always bad guys. That meant these guys were evil, and therefore, free exp!

Wanda wanda'd out of the bushes, casually walking over to us and picking up the cool skull cup, which I had spared because it looked cool.

"I don't know what these guys are up to," I told them, gesturing into the darkness of the entrance. "But there's a 50% chance it's something evil."

I darted over the threshold, drawing my sword and stabbing two cultists and a coatrack with a robe on it. My eyes adjusted to the darkness, and I could make out a couch, a small table with informational pamphlets, and a large calendar on the wall.

Torches lit the room in a dim, flickering light, almost obscuring the stairs hidden between the glowing placards in the center of the room.

"Wan!" Wanda gasped, drawing my attention to her pointing hand, and then the calendar, which she was pointing at. "Isn't that today?"

I smiled and started to walk over to give her headpats for knowing what a calendar was, but froze in fear as I read the entry for today's date:

TODAY: Improv Class Doughnuts and Sermon Animeholics Anonymous

Summon The Dark One from his eternal slumber :)

"Oh no..." I moaned, clenching my katana in my shaking fist. "We have to hurry!"

I swooced down the stairs, with Bonbon and Wanda doing their best to keep up behind me. This was dangerous! If we didn't hurry, they'd run out of doughnuts!

I murdered my way through the dark hallways and stone chambers beneath the earth, but couldn't find even a single donut. My heart pounded in my chest, and I froze mid-stab as I heard an ominous chant echoing down the passages.

I was too late...

The dark rites had begun.