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That One Isekai [My Only Cheat Skill is All of Them]
Expedition 2.21 - That time I was reincarnated into another world and set out to beat up some Elves

Expedition 2.21 - That time I was reincarnated into another world and set out to beat up some Elves

That Time I Got Sent to Another World Where All of the Girls Are Super Hot and Super Into Me Because I Am Super Strong and Have Very Powerful Abilities that God Gave to Me Because Me and Them Were Friends When I Was in Grade School and God Is Actually A Loli Who is Also in Love with Me Because I Am A Super Epic Person Who Will Defeat The Demon Lord Who Threatens The Entire World but the Demon Lord Actually is in Love With Me and the Demon Lord is a Super Hot Busty Babe Who is Actually Just Trying to Get My Attention Because I Have a Cellphone That Can Contact the Internet and Can Get Anything Shipped To Me Within 2 Days But I Barely Need It Because I Am Actually the Most Strongest Guy Alive Because I Have Super Strong Powers Like Being Able to Lift Your Mom Really Easily Which is Nearly Impossible Because Your Mom is So Fat But is Actually A Secret Anime Busty Babe Who is Really into Me Because I Am Super Cool and Better Than Your Dad Because He is Super Lame Which I Am Not

Expedition 2.21 - That time I was reincarnated into another world and set out to beat up some Elves

I walked into the cafeteria, beaming at the few [Paladins] within. I glanced at my wrist, then checked the time on my [Status HUD]. It was a bit late for lunch, but still a bit too early for dinner. I hoped the cafeteria still had something to eat! Otherwise, I'd have to go bug Bonbon to hadoken me up a pizza or something.

Still! [Legendary Hero]! I placed my hands on my hips, beaming with pride. Figuratively, at first, but then I remembered that I was in a badass isekai gamelike litRPG world! I activated my [Instantly Learn Skill] skill!

ERROR:

[Icon of Pride] has not been obtained!

This skill may not be purchased or obtained manually via growth skills

Lame. Whatever. I settled for smiling and winking at the [Paladins] as I walked past them. They looked up at me, furrowing their brows in what was probably starstruck nervousness. They might not have been at the Visitation to hear the good news, but I knew that [Paladins] had a telepathic network, so the Queen [Paladin] had probably relayed the fact that I was the [Legendary Hero] to the rest of them. Either that, or I was thinking of ants.

I tossed a coin into the fountain, watching the jets of water spraying up and over a statue of Kamiko, who was dressed in a school swimsuit with both water wings and an inflatable inner tube around her waist. I walked over to the long counter which opened to the kitchen. The worker at the counter looked up at me as I approached.

"Shoyu ramen, with extra Chasu," I told her, dropping a random handful of coins onto the counter.

"What?"

I turned and leaned against the counter, my mind buzzing with what I later realized were thoughts. I was the [Legendary Hero]! I wasn't sure how to feel about it, to be honest. On the one hand, it did mean that I was extremely famous, which was always a good thing. It also meant that I'd qualify for the [Hero] discount at most hotels and restaurants, which was nice. I'd probably get a lot of free things in general, actually.

But on the other hand... being a [Legendary Hero] meant that I had tons of responsibilities now! For instance... the [Legendary Hero] had to defeat the [Demon Lord]! I shook my head. That one really sucked! I already had to kill the [Demon Lord] from the Quest Kamiko gave me! Now I had to kill him twice?!

I was busy sighing and brooding to myself while waiting for my ramen. Behind me, the cook kept trying to ask me questions with increasing insistence, but I ignored her and waved her off.

"I don't care, just make it however you normally do," I said dismissively

"Sir, for the fourth time, I don't know what any of those words meant! What are..."

"X," I sighed, shaking my head and ignoring the NPC. I was about to settle back into another 25 minutes of debating whether it was worth it or not to be a [Legendary Hero], when a sudden message pinged into my head, and my [Status HUD].

New Quest Added!

Main Story Quest:

Subjugate the Elves!

"Heh..." I chuckled to myself. "Looks like this is a tough one...:"

The new [Quest]... this definitely presented some difficulties. I sat and gave it some thought for a second, but could come to only one conclusion. I bowed my head in resignation, giving a wry smile as the cook behind me gave up shouting at me and went back to whatever bullshit she was doing before.

"Looks like I'll have to use... that." I smirked, activating my [Mental Dictionary] to look up what 'Subjugate' meant.

Huh... well, that seemed pretty easy, actually! It was nice to have a problem that could be solved with violence! I mean, I usually solved most of my problems with violence, but it was nice to have one that people wouldn't yell at me about. I wasn't sure if there was a time limit on this quest or anything, but I'm sure I could at least wait for my ramen to be finished first.

I leaned back, playing some [Snake] on my [Brain Cellphone] while I wondered what was taking my ramen so long. I'd just about beaten my high score when I saw Bonbon coming into the cafeteria.

She walked in slowly, scanning the room with a concerned expression on her face, as if she were looking for something. I bet it was her arm, which was still missing for some reason. I pushed away from the counter and walked towards her, casually creating a giant greatsword using [Create Weapon], and resting it on my shoulder.

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She saw me, and relief flooded her face. She jogged towards me, slowing to a stop as she got closer.

"Hiro-san! There you are. What..." she glanced at my greatsword, and relief unflooded her face, her emotional rain cycle revealing the worry underneath. "Um.... what are you... doing?"

"Bonbon!" I replied cheerily. "Great timing! I just got a new quest! Hold still!"

"Huh? H-hold sti--EEP!"

I brought my greatsword down in a mighty chop, which Bonbon evaded by diving to the side. W-what?! I'd told her to stand still and everything! My lazy attack missed, casually bisecting one of the thick wooden tables, hewing through it and both benches in a single swipe.

"What the heck do you think you're doing?" I demanded, lifting my blade for another strike. I was flabbergasted by her sudden disobedience.

"H-huh?! That's my line!" she shouted back to me. "Why are you swinging that at me?! I could have died!"

I blinked at her, cocking my head in confusion as I swung my greatsword in an airsplitting horizontal swing. She flopped to the ground, making inarticulate Bonbon noises of fear as she evaded the strike.

"Uh, yeah? I told you, already. I got a [Quest]! It told me to subjugate the [Elves]."

"S-stop attacking me!" she cried, scrambling around to the other side of the fountain to put it between us. The other [Paladins] had stood up, but were looking warily at the table I'd destroyed rather than helping me catch Bonbon. I felt a little guilty; they must have really liked that table.

I started walking around the fountain, and she went around in the same direction, so that the fountain remained between us. I sighed, slightly irritated at her tactical genius.

"I told you already," I explained, rolling my eyes. "I have a [Quest]. If the voices in my head are telling me to kill [Elves], then obviously I have to listen to them."

"H-Hiro-san, I-I don't think that's what the [Quest] is for! Did you even read the description?"

Huh? Description? I started jogging around the fountain with my sword at the ready, causing Bonbon to start running around it in fear. Description... I checked my [Quest Log] as I leisurely closed the gap between us.

Main Story Quest:

Subjugate the Elves!

-King Chad and his [Valley Elves] are harassing towns all over the countryside! Defeat King Chad and put a stop to their raiding!

Rewards:

-500 XP

-Unique Achievement: "Lookism"

-New Party Member

Huh... I wasn't sure what a [Valley Elf] was, but it sounded too cool for Bonbon to be one of them. I dropped my greatsword, letting it dissipate back into a maelstrom of energy that singed the floor and cracked the tiles before fading away. I guess Bonbon could live for now. More importantly, that quest log said something about a new party member!

A party member... that meant a new member of my harem, right? I pumped my fist victoriously. My list of hot busty anime babes just kept growing! And... that wasn't even counting the fact that this entire Paladin order was full of babes. I kept forgetting about it, but wasn't the entire reason I came here to get another waifu for my harem?

Bonbon cautiously watched from the furthest corner of the room as I sat down on the fountain. [Paladins] were starting to filter in, probably because the hivemind had reported that I was in the cafeteria. I couldn't help but grin a smile. With this many to choose from, I bet I could hold some kind of a contest, or even a tournament arc!

I started to mentally sort the [Paladins] by breast size, when I saw Mother Margaret enter the room. She had a few other older-looking nuns following her, and as soon as they saw me, they walked over.

"My, my," Mother Margaret ufufu'd, holding her hand in front of her mouth. "You seem to be full of energy, aren't you? I'm glad there were no side effects from the curse!"

"Indeed," one of the old ladies croaked, her voice like a tin can full of rocks. "That you are in good health is most fortuitous. I am glad to have lived to see the day of your arrival, Hiro Protagonist."

"Hiro ♥ Protagonist," I corrected her. She closed her eyes and bowed her head.

"Yes, forgive me. Hiro ♥ Protagonist. Your coming is a portentous one."

I resisted the urge to make a dirty joke, sensing that she would probably hit me with a ruler if I did. I simply nodded instead.

"My name is Mother Loretta Exposita. I am the [Lorekeeper] of this Order. If you are to be the [Legendary Hero], then there is much you need to know."

At that, the ancient nun snapped her fingers. I wasn't sure if the noise came from the fingers themselves, or if she had just broken her fingerbones. On her command, two strong-looking [Paladins] entered the room, carrying a book that was the same size she was. With a window-rattling slam, they gently set the book in front of Mother Exposita, who set down a step stool and hopped up, heaving the book open with all her strength.

She cleared her throat and began to speak.

"This is the legend of the First Hero, Ardrick."

"Sounds derivative," I commented. In a motion too fast to see, Mother Exposita whipped my knuckles with a ruler. Agh! That hurt! I rubbed at my hand and scowled at her.

"Long ago, thousands of years ago, the vile [Dragon King] was attacking kingdom after kingdom, and ruling with an iron fist. The people wailed, and cried out for a hero, and it is said that their cries ascended to Heaven itself, and the Goddess Yggdrisia took heed! Enter Ardrick, the [Legendary Hero]. Summoned from another world by the Goddess Yggdrisia, Ardrick was charged with the holy task to defeat the [Dragon King], and save the entirety of our Kickass LitRPG Isekai Fantasy World!"

She turned the page, slowly blinking at the next one.

"Of course, before Ardrick could set out, he had to meet with the King. So he went into the castle, and he spoke to the nearest guard, who said unto him "There are many guards in the castle!". And yea, Ardrick spoke to him again, and once more did the guard inform him: "There are many guards in the castle!" And so Ardrick continued on his journey, until he encountered a second guard, whereupon he spoke to him as well."

I tapped my foot as Mother Exposita continued her story. I'm not sure if it was the fact that the book looked like it was longer than roughly half of online isekai webnovels, or if it was just the fact that she was very old, but I got the feeling this was going to take a while! Every second I wasted here was another I wasn't spending getting hot lady knights into my harem!

I glanced up at her as she continued to read.

" 'But thou must!' the princess insisted, once more. But Ardrick was undaunted, and once again he swore to her: 'nay'. The princess was unmoved, her heart overflowing with affection, and refused to accept his refusal. She stared deep into his eyes, and said unto him: 'But thou..."

She was pretty immersed into whatever bullshit she was spewing. Now was my chance! I activated all of my magic Skills and cast [Create Shadow Clone No Bunshin], creating three identical copies of myself, all sitting in the same position that I was sitting on the fountain. I quickly slunk away, temporarily invisible from the effects of the spell, and sneaked into the hallway. With this, she'd continue to read her story to my shadow clone, none the wiser that I'd given her the slip!

I fled down the hallway, cackling to myself. Time to finally choose somebody to join my harem!