That Time I Got Sent to Another World Where All of the Girls Are Super Hot and Super Into Me Because I Am Super Strong and Have Very Powerful Abilities that God Gave to Me Because Me and Them Were Friends When I Was in Grade School and God Is Actually A Loli Who is Also in Love with Me Because I Am A Super Epic Person Who Will Defeat The Demon Lord Who Threatens The Entire World but the Demon Lord Actually is in Love With Me and the Demon Lord is a Super Hot Busty Babe Who is Actually Just Trying to Get My Attention Because I Have a Cellphone That Can Contact the Internet and Can Get Anything Shipped To Me Within 2 Days But I Barely Need It Because I Am Actually the Most Strongest Guy Alive Because I Have Super Strong Powers Like Being Able to Lift Your Mom Really Easily Which is Nearly Impossible Because Your Mom is So Fat But is Actually A Secret Anime Busty Babe Who is Really into Me Because I Am Super Cool and Better Than Your Dad Because He is Super Lame Which I Am Not
Clue 2.26 - That time I was reincarnated into another world and had a party in my pants
I looked over the township, my eyes sparkling with non-elemental excitement as I took in the sweeping vistas! The vista swept down the side of a tall hill, and through a clean town full of sparkling buildings. Each of them was made with white rocks or white wood or maybe just painted white, I wasn't sure. The city drizzled down the hill, ending in a large, shabby-looking dockside area complete with a scenic cloud of perpetual dusk hanging over it.
And I mentioned the dock, right? Well, when you say dock, you know what that means, right? The sea! I stared out at the Badass Gamelike LitRPG ocean! It was the kind of sight that made you say 'The ocean!'
"The ocean!" I shouted happily. I felt my feelings swelling within my chest, somewhere on the left side slightly above my lung. The city was full of bustles or whatever, with tons of Isekai denizens going about their business, busty anime babe and non-busty anime non-babes alike! There was even a dwarf! Something about this view was totally nostalgic. I could only let out a sigh of admiration.
"Wow..." I whispered to myself. "Where the fuck am I?"
I mean, I'd woken up in the basement of this big stone babe-lair behind me, right? The last thing I remembered before that was being on the road. And then the [Demon Lord] had personally put a curse on me, as was my understanding of the events between. Wanda also mentioned something about some hot elf chicks who attacked the cart? I was kinda doubtful, because I was pretty sure I would have remembered if I came into close proximity with a new hot anime babe, but Bonbon and Ciel both said that she was telling the truth.
Well, I guess it doesn't matter. I doubt it'll ever be relevant again, so I can't dwell on the waifus of the past! I was a modern Isekai man, and I had to look to the future! As they say, the breast was yet to come!
"Alright," I said, turning towards my harem. Bonbon was there, looking kind of nervous and rubbing at the end of her arm, which she still hadn't regenerated for some reason. Wanda seemed subdued and a little irritated after her tour of the big house, by which I mean the small cell she'd been confined to.
Ciel seemed the most excited to be setting out, which was kind of weird because I'm pretty sure she lived here? Her being excited to be on her front lawn was the kind of thing I expected from Wanda. She was also looking at me in a way that was making me extremely nervous, because it seemed like she was totally into me! I mean, most girls I met were totally into me, but she was (figuratively) burning a hole through me with her gaze.
Like most problems, I felt like it'd be best if I just ignored it. I turned away from her, and pointed out in the general direction of town.
"Alright, gang! It's time to go investigate and find out where these Valley Elves are!"
I unsheathed my board, doing a casual standing frontflip to mount it before pushing myself down the hill. I started to zoom down the slope, veering to the side and popping my board up to nosegrind along a handrail. My [Sk8r Boy] title instantly kicked in, accelerating me along the grind while the points racked up. I glanced behind me, and realized that my harem members were still at the top of the hill, watching my speed away.
Ugh! They were so slow! I'd have to find some way to invent/plagiarize a car or something. This was really starting to bug me! My Skateboarding Chi was all over the place, having to slow down for them. I wish there were some kind of way for them to keep up!
[Request Registered]
Huh?
[Legendary Hero] perk [Pocket Party] registered.
Do you wish to activate perk? [Invest 1 MM]
Huh? What was this now? A perk? [Pocket Party]? Invest? MM? 1? I wasn't really sure what all that nonsense meant, but I did know one thing for sure! When the Badass Isekai LitRPG [World System] suddenly offered you some random benefit with no explanation, you took it, no questions asked!
[Candidate System Message]
You have Invested 1 MM into Aspect: [Legendary Hero]
Perk Obtained: [Pocket Party]
Hell yeah! I don't know what all that meant, but I'd probably gotten some kind of new cheat skill! Based on the name, it sounded like there was some kind of party in my pants! I wonder who's invited.
I turned around to extend an invitation my harem members.
"Guys! Guess what!"
Bonbon looked up, before suddenly turning into a ball of light and shooting towards me.
"Too slow!" I shouted, parrying the ball of light and sending it spiraling through the air. I glanced over and my eyes widened, as two more of the attacks were headed my way! I dodgerolled out of the way, but gasped in shock as they suddenly veered in midair and slammed into my back with all the fury of a down pillow being gently set on a bed.
"N-nani?!" I shouted, as a strange warm sensation spread across my back before dissipating. I whirled around to look for the other two balls, but they had vanished entirely as soon as they'd hit me! I turned to confront the last ball of light, just in time for it to slam into my chest, disappearing inside of me. D-damn it! They got me!
The narrative has been taken without authorization; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.
I looked around me, katana at the ready. I was wary after they'd gotten the jump on me once, and had no idea what else might be coming. Suddenly, I heard a familiar voice echoing in my head:
Skill: [Paranoid - Lvl 1] has leveled up to [Paranoid - Lvl 2]
And besides that, I also heard the voice of my harem members, echoing in my head somehow, as if they were using a CODEC or something. But... they were Badass RPG Isekai Gamelike World Dirtworlders, they didn't have things like technology or predatory phone service plans. How could this be?!
"W-w-w-w-w-w...." Bonbon stammered, mentally
"Whoah, wan! This is a nice place, Master!" Wanda shouted happily
"Wait, what just happened?" the other one asked.
"Huh?" I said, out loud, whirling around. "Where are you guys? How are you shouting over my CODEC?"
"Did we get teleported or something?" Ciel asked, sounding a little stressed.
"W-why do things like this keep happening?! Am I being punished?!" Bonbon sobbed, sounding slightly more stressed.
D-damn it! Somebody must have kidnapped my harem members! That meant... wait a second. That meant I get to rescue them! That definitely sounded like a flag had been raised! To be the big damn hero rescuing the beautiful maidens, and to then be rewarded in physical affection! That kind of story just wrote itself!
I applied some [Lip Balm] and ran my fingers through my hair, before flourishing my katana. First things first... I'd have to find them! But, I was an expert at this by this point! I activated my [Elf Detection] skill, instantly pulling up several hits in-town.
Kuso... there were too many to just pick one! (TL Note: kuso means dagnabbit)
But, I wasn't about to give up! I already knew the trick to this! I activated [Chef Detection] as well, and soon saw a Chef ping and an Elf ping, in close proximity! They weren't 100% overlapped like they were when I used it before, but I think it was safe to assume this was just a visual metaphor for Bonbon's current freakout. Still, there were too many other Elves and/or Cheves moving around in the town. Time was of the essence here, so I quickly marked my destination with a Waypoint using my [Status HUD].
There was no time to lose!
I jumped back onto my board, leaping into the air and soaring full-speed down the path. I guess one good thing about my girls being kidnapped: I didn't have to worry about slowing down for them to keep up! They continued to talk in my head as well.
"Calm down, Bons. I dunno if we're in danger here."
Bonbon's sobbing slowly petered out to a gentle sniffle, and I heard footsteps. They seemed to move around me, like one of those cool holophonic ASMR videos. I shivered slightly as I got mad air and popped a 900 off a physics glitch I executed on a trash can.
I soared into the air, and Wanda cleared her throat.
"Wan! I think we're inside Master, wan!"
W-wait! What'd she just say? I-Inside me?!
"U-uh," I stammered confidently. "I... I've never had a girl inside me b-before... I didn't even know I was into that kind of thing."
"What kind of thing?" Ciel asked cluelessly. "How are we inside Hiro-kun? This is a room, isn't it? I mean, it's got a couch and a minibar and everything."
"Wan," Wanda mused. "I can't say as to the 'how' or the 'why' it occurred, but I think you'll find as you travel with Hiro that such things tend to have simple, if unsatisfactory answers, wan. Hiro is not dissimilar to a mad, idiot god, manifesting his every whims without thought or reason. What I am sure of, however, is that this place is some sort of mental mindscape. It's very clean and precise, wan, but I believe that's the effect of some form of [Skill]. Perhaps an [Arte], but it seems too... permanent for that. What's more, that window behind you seems to be showing the world through Hiro's eyes. Notice the skateboard, wan?"
"Huh..."
"...why are we inside Hiro?" Bonbon asked. "How... how do we get out?"
I quickly dismounted from my skateboard, using three fruit carts in series to slow my speed down to safe levels. I shook the splinters and bits of watermelon out of my hair, staring down at my torso. Various fruit peddlers were screaming obscenities in my general direction, but all I could hear was the pounding of my heart, and Wanda popping open a bottle of something from my mental minibar.
They were... inside me? Well... that just made things so much easier, didn't it?
"Hang on guys!" I told them, plunging my arm wrist-deep into my midsection. "I'll get you out!"
I started rooting around, feeling for anything that might be a busty anime babe, and chuckling to myself as I realized that I could probably get away with 'accidentally' groping one of them as I rummaged blindly through my own organs. I shoved a few things out of the way, and noticed that I was starting to feel kind of sleepy. I wasn't sure why, since I'd apparently been asleep for several days. I was probably dehydrated. I learned [Thirst Resistance - Lvl 1] using my [Instantly Learn Skill] skill, but activating it didn't seem to help. That was fine though, it probably didn't work retroactively.
But none of that was important right now! What was important was the fact that my harem girls were still trapped inside me! I had to save them! I needed them to get out!
Suddenly, three orbs of golden light shot out of my chest. I was mildly surprised, because I only occasionally activated attack [Skills] without thinking about it, and I was pretty sure I hadn't done so just then!
The orbs landed on the ground near me, and flashed with light, becoming Wanda, Bonbon, and Ciel! I did it! I rescued them!
"Thank goodness..." I sighed, withdrawing my hand from my stomach and using [Ultra Max Regeneration] to heal myself back up to perfect health. I wiped my hand off on a nearby fruit peddler's apron, before discarding him in the nearest appropriate trash receptacle, like a responsible adult.
"Oh, thank Flavos..." Bonbon sighed, flopping to her knees and touching the grass gratefully. It seemed like she'd calmed down a bit, which was good. That increased the chances I would get a smooch or something in return!
Ciel rubbed the back of her head, looking around in confusion. "So, uh... what was that, anyways?"
I scratched my chin. She had a point. What, exactly, had happened? I'd gotten a new skill, hadn't I? Or something like that? Maybe that was what had caused it?
"Ah, wan..." Wanda sighed, looking down. "We can't bring stuff out of there?" She indicated her empty hand with her eyes, where a helpful dotted-line outline blinked to indicate the missing presence of a bottle of liquor.
"Master! Put me back in! I want to be inside you!"
I blushed and looked away. "B-but Wanda-san... we already made this joke."
"Wan! Any joke that's worth a laugh is worth milking well beyond its half-life, wan!"
She did have a point. If something was funny once, it was funny a thousand times. But still, I didn't want to think about it too hard, or else I might invite people to scrutinize the humor more closely, and force me to put actual effort into my jokes!
"M-milk?!" I gasped instead, "T-that comes from boobs. W-wanda-chan, that's impure!"
Wanda stared at me with a deadpan expression on her cute face.
"Wan. Just activate the [Skill] again, Master."
"Okay."
I sent a mental command to my [Pocket Party] perk, and at once, my harem members turned into gold orbs and shot back into my chest. W-wait a minute! That was on purpose?! This changed everything! If I kept my party in my pocket, then I could travel way faster! I grinned a smile, doing a canned victory dance in celebration.
"With a [Pocket Party], I can go anywhere!" I proclaimed. But where should I go?
"What were we doing again?" I asked. Several generations of my attention span had risen and fallen in the time I'd spent dicking around with this bit, and I felt like the readers had probably gotten a little off-track too.
"Huh? Hiro-kun, it's been like five minutes, hasn't it?" Ciel asked.
"This is pretty normal, wan." Wanda replied.
Bonbon, who seemed a lot calmer now that she knew why she'd become orb and teleported to a strange room, let out a sigh.
"We're looking for the Valley Elves, Hiro-san. You said you wanted to, well... 'ask around in town', I guess?"
Ah! That's right! I glanced back at the Paladin order at the top of the hill and shot it a finger gun. Those experienced and seasoned warriors were counting on me to save them from a couple random raiders. I couldn't afford to let them down, especially because they were varying combinations of hot, anime, busty, and girl, which were some of my favorite qualities in a woman.
"Alright," I said. "Let's get to business!"
I glanced at the town and realized with a start that there was a waypoint somewhere close to, but zoning-distinct from the docks! That must be the first stop!
I chuckled to myself, and threw my skateboard high into the air, before using [3D Manipulation] to fly up after it. Time to get this show on the road!