:: Dear Diary… This is messed up. I had no clue this mission was going to be this hard. I haven’t even located where the captures Werewolf girl is and I’m already being chased like I’m a bandit on a wanted poster! Worse, the one who want to claim my bounty are nothing but walking dead corpses and skeletons! Th-this is too much, I want to go home. There’s no place like home. There’s no place like home, there’s-----GUBFFFFFFF!? ::
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*SCREEEEEEEEEEECH--SLAM!*
"GBFFFFFFFFFFFFFF!? F**K! M-MY NOSE! AUUUUGH!""
"...Big...Big Sis.... I.."
Pastrache was reeling. It should be obvious as to why, no?
She thought she was safe inside of the crew compartment of the T-34 Russian Tank, hiding behind 42 inch iron armor that was designed to deflect as much heavy ballistics as possible before it could be crippled on the battlefield.
But what she didn't expect was for the self-driving tank to suddenly stop, and smack her face into the front consoles.
Hence, why she was stomping her heels into the floor and grabbing her poor nose. Like how NBA players bellow and reel when they stub their toes... True Story.
"I-it hurts! It really hurts! Oh god, i-is it broken? I-is it damaged to the point where I-I have to resort to plastic reconstruction magic? I-I can't afford it! My-my entire inventory will be brankrupt for sure!"
"... B-Big Sis, y-you should look at this--"
"A-and furthermore, auuuugh...Wh-why did you stop Nello!? Just because we lost the undead horde chasing us with pistols and rifles, doesn't mean you should stay still in one place too long. It's only a matter of time before--"
"B-Big Sis. L-listen to me--"
"No. I can't. Do you know how badly my legs are shaking right now? C-can you feel my heels clicking hard enough to squeak 'there's no place like home' there's no place like home!'. I regret taking this mission. I shouldn't have let that St. Bernard Chieftain bribe me with life supply of golden corn and luxury buffalo pelts! Wh-what was I thinking? WHAT THE H*LL AM I GOING TO DO WITH ALL THAT CORN? I'LL GET SICK FROM EATING POPCORN THE FOR THE REST OF MY--"
"I found her."
"Not now, Nello. Let me sulk. If a girl doesn't get her woes off her chest, she will never be able to sleep soundly tonight. The last thing I want to do, is make usless moaning sounds while I toss and turn in my bed... people will thing I'm a nymph with relationship problems and--"
"I-I found Lily Tiger!"
"This isn't the time to go to the Public Garden and look at the beautiful flowers in full bloom. This is a crisis worse than mid-life................WHAT THE F**K!?"
[https://66.media.tumblr.com/572f45ad3ccb6622a0d8a75591cbb043/tumblr_pnr1czw6jv1wqnuuso1_1280.pnj]
"Wh-why hello there little Doggy... C-come to Big Sister. Don't worry, sh-she won't bite you."
"....Bafu. Chomp."
"GUBYAAAAAAAAAAAAH! SH-SHE BIT ME! SHE REALLY BITE ME! W-WILL I GET RABIES! LITTLE WEREWOLF, PLEASE TELL ME YOU'VE BEEN VACCINATED!"
Pastrache Mooneye was happy.
Despite how much she was screaming bloody murder, she was really, really happy. The best way to describe her joy, is that she finally found the one person she was charged to look for that started this whole fiasco.
The daughter of the Lycan Trie's Chieftain.
Lily Tiger.
Hence why she scrambled out of Nello's safe tummy, while in the middle of enemy territory, and speak to the animal girl on a personal level.
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"....O...Oh my god. Y-you look different than the other puppies that would rub their sloppering mouths and snot over me. Y-you... C-can I touch your ears?"
"Befu. CHOMP."
"F**K! F****K! SH-SHE BITE ME AGAIN! D-DOES THIS MEAN THE VIRUS HAS MULTIPLIED! SH*T! WH-WHERE'S THE VET!? WHERE IS THE VEEEEEEET!?"
In a barren wasteland dedicated to Undead Populace, there was no such thing as a veterinary office in these parts.
The horses and cattle were all zombies or necro-animals... there was no point in hiring a professional animal doctor. No, they'll just go bankrupt, descend in a downward spiral of liqour and gambling, get tossed out on the street half naked, bitten by either a zombie or vampire woman, and then turned into an undead.
...At most, this pathway will lead to an increase in town population. The economy will still be sh*t, but there was nothing the Undead could do about it. In the Undead West, you don't need money to survive.
"Aaaagh! L-let go of my hand! I-it's not a chew toy t-to exercise your baby teeth! Uuuwaaggaghh! Sh-she's licking my palm! I-if it was a dog that's one thing, b-but she's doing it with the ferocity of a lonely man! I-it's unsettling!"
"Bafu, bafu! Nom nom nom!"
The one Pastrache was talking to... or yelling about, was this little girl with doggy ears and a bushy wolf tail. Despite her Lycan Blood, she could easily pass off for a human child who was into Cosplay at an early age (children grow so fast).
To match with her family's motif for tribesman, she was wearing this robe made from animal hide and tied with sinews made from the bark of ancient trees, twisted into decorative knots. A multi-colored bandana sat on her head, a cute little feather poking out from the end.
She could be found staring up at the beautiful Half-Elf stranger, her wolf ears flopping as she tilted her head.
"...Bafu???"
"N-now, now. Th-there's no- no need to stare at me. I-I'm not a stranger. O-oh gosh nooooo. I-I'm your father's friend? Y-you know, your father? Big man, old pervert, dog face?"
"... Bafu."
"O-oh god, the way you're nodding is making your ears flop up and down. SQUEEEEEEEE!...Ah...back to the matter at hand. S-simply put, I-I'm here to rescue you right now."
".......Bafu???"
"...C...Could it be that you don't know the Common Language?"
The little Werewolf suddenly shook her head, whch surprised the Half-Elf. Did this mean she understood the Common Word, but she didn't know how to speak it... or perhaps, she was fluent but didn't bother to talk.
Exactly like a teenager who would rather text to hold a conversation... even when you're sitting right next to him.
"I-is there some way you can believe that I'm here to rescue you and not kidnap you?"
"..........Bafu! Bafuuu-fuu!"
"O-oh! You're nodding...D-does that me-mean we-we can come to an agreement? You will believe me when I say I-I'm here to help you!?"
Pastrache's eyes went wide every time the Werewolf Girl Lily Tiger nodded her head to her questions, ears flapping all the while. When the little Lycan Girl tried to explain something in a small voice, the Half-Elf ended up doubling over with her hands on her knees.
She was put in a vulnerable position if the little girl were a little boy, all the lovely gaps and curves on her body could easily be seen. But it was a chance she was willing to take, so she sucked in her gut and listened carefully to the Lycan Girl's request.
"Bafu...Bafu..."
With small incoherent barks, Lily Tiger opened her mouth and pointed at it.
".......You're hungry? You want me to give you something to eat... Um... Sure... what?"
"Bafu."
With a small incoherent point, Lily Tiger poked Pastrache's breasts.
".......................................................................WHAT THE F--"
Children under five, please do not try this at home.
"Y-you want to... drink from my---OH H****LL NO! IT WILL BE A COLD DAY IN THE NETHERWORLD BEFORE I LET ANY MAN, WOMAN, OR CHILDREN - OTHER THAN THE POTENTIAL HUSBAND - TO EAT MY BODY! JU-JUST HOW OLD ARE YOU ANYWAY!? 10!?"
"...Bafu."
"I DON'T BELIEVE IN YOUR TWO FINGERS! YOU LOOK OLD ENOUGH TO WEEN OFF YOUR MOTHER'S MILK! GYAAAAH! NO! S-STOP GRABBING AT MY SHIRT! N-NOTHING IS GOING TO HAPPEN, E-EVEN IF YOU BITE ME! GYAAAH! GYAAAH! AAAGGBBFFF! KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"
...And the Half-Elf gave a loud shriek as if she was captured by a horde of zombies.
...But at this point, Pastrache would take her chances with a horde of zombies. Her probability of survival would be higher than the situation she was trapped in right now.
"N-NOOOO! I-I D-DON'T EVEN HAVE A HUSBAND! I-I'M NOT READY TO BE A MOTHEEEEER! GUGYAAAGH!"
"Bafu! Bafu! Nom Nom! Aaaaaaah!"
Fortunately, the Half-Elf learned enough Judo Techniques to overcome an opponent and put the little Wolf Girl in a straight-jacket lock... nothing special happened that day.
"Bafuuuuuuu (TxT)."
"D-don't cry you little fluffy brat! I-I should be the one crying right now... M-my clothes are all torn! Sob (TxT)."