"Quest date, quest date," Calumnia sings gleefully. "Quest date, quest date."

Diamond wasn't looking as cheerful, however. "I might die, I might die," he whispered to himself. "I am probably going to die."

"We made it." Calumnia stops and stares at the scenery ahead of her. "Now we just have to kill every single zombie in this blight."

For those who want an explanation, a blight is a magical area created by a small group of zombies. It creates a large, green gas cloud over the area that slowly drains health from other creatures while healing the zombies in it. It also seems to be the reason humans and other intelligent races become zombies when killed by one, but the way it works is yet to be fully discovered.

"All we have to do is kill all of these zombies," Calumnia eagerly exclaimed. "Then again, for the great Diamond, this should be a breeze!"

"Totally," Diamond said, despite wanting to run and scream at the top of his lungs. "I'll protect you."

"Aww, how romantic. So le- ouch! Where did these knives come from?"

Somehow, at that very moment, a large number of knives ruptured her back.

"Maybe we should rest a bit," Diamond said. "I mean, you are quite injured right now, and you need to be in top shape to fight."

"Thanks but no thanks. Just being next to the one I love will heal me in both body and soul. Now let's go!"

Calumnia marches forward into the blight while Daemonium comes to terms with his own mortality and accepts his impending doom. Then he walks in.

Inside was a wasteland. The grass was shriveled to the point of being ashes on the floor, and the dead trees looked like dying hairs. Now that I say that this place looks like one of those diagrams showing a close up of human skin, or it's the scalp of some ugly dude. Either way, other than Calumnia and Diamond, there was nothing there.

"It seems there is nothing here," Diamond said. "Maybe if we come back later we ca-"

"HEY ZOMBIES!" Calumnia yelled with a yell that sounded like it could destroy cities. "COME OUT AND FIGHT ME!"

"When this is over I'm gonna friend zone her," Diamond whispered.

The zombies were previously asleep, but the yell had awoken them. Their hands popped out of the ground like a scene in a horror movie. Eventually, the creatures made of purple rotten flesh emerged from the ground, and they did so menacingly.

"So it's true," Calumnia squealed in amazement. "Zombies really are naked!"

Yes, the zombies were naked. They aren't wearing the tattered clothes you'd see on horror movie zombies, they are just bare naked. Luckily (or unluckily for the cultured crowd) most of the censored bits for the zombies have completely decayed away. That isn't to say there weren't a few with big boobies or large dicks, but don't fuck a zombie, just don't.

"Calumnia," Daemonium said with a hint of exhaustion. "Why do you care what they wear or not?"

"If they were wearing clothes I'd use a spell to zap only the clothes away."

"There's a spell for that?" Daemonium started to imagine the possibilities.

This story originates from a different website. Ensure the author gets the support they deserve by reading it there.

"It's banned in most countries though, so don't snitch please." Luckily for her, it was about to be legal in Daemonium's country. His country also happened to be the shadow people, who just so happen to be half of the world's population. The other half better take notes.

The zombies were now completely out of the ground now. They let out a deep growl that showed they were ready and decided to target Diamond. And they went to him.

Imagine a zombie walking towards you in a zombie invasion. Chances are that you imagined a slow-moving creature creeping towards you one step at a time. That is not how zombies work here. In this story, zombies are fast, hella fast. They dash towards their targets with the speed of a leopard and considering Daemonium's speed stat he is officially fucked.

Luckily for him, he's a protagonist.

"Lightning Bolt!" A large bolt of blue lightning comes out of Calumnia's palm and skewers the zombies that rush in his direction. She proceeds to spam this attack and murders most of the zombies there.

Meanwhile, Diamond decides to sneak out in order to avoid death, but in what looks like a zombie saying "surprise motherfucker" one immediately rushes in front of him to cut him off. Calumnia leaves that zombie alone assuming that Daemonium could take it.

That was false.

A punch from the zombie sent Daemonium a few meters away, his flight only interrupted by crashing into a tree. The zombie quickly catches up and pummels the hurt Daemonium with punches so fast it looked like a stand rush.

"It's over for me," Daemonium thought to himself. "Goodbye cruel world."

Instead, that didn't happen.

As if it was trying every last thing to survive his body released its largest puff of Lovely Pheromones. It was so big it seemed to create a pink blight inside the blight they were in. While zombies' reproductive system would make them have no need to feel love Amare designed the spell in a way that allows any creature to fall in love with the user with a strong enough dose. The required amount for zombies was a bit high due to a lack of the sense of smell but luckily there was just enough bullshi- I mean pheromones in order to entrance them all.

All but one.

That zombie was the most dangerous zombie of all. The only zombie in the group to reach level 35 and the smartest and deadliest of them all.

It was promptly defeated by a Lightning Bolt.

Luck and Charisma stats increased due to a special action!

LCK +15

CHR + 30

Meanwhile, the zombie that was just punching Daemonium picked up the injured half-demon-half-succubus-pretend-full-human adventurer and carried him outside the blight, while the others felt shame.

"Amazing," said Calumnia with her normal brand of excitement. "I have never seen anyone defeat zombies like that!"

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Daemonium (still in his Diamond form) woke up to see Calumnia smiling down on him. His head was rested on Calumnia's lap in a way that single people like me can't relate to.

"That was amazing," Calumnia said to him with a smile. "You got all the zombies to submit to you with so much of your Lovely Pheromones spell. Unfortunately, you seemed to have been knocked out in the process or something."

Switching quickly to his Diamond persona Daemonium smiled. "To be honest, I faked the falling unconscious part. I just wanted to see someone as cute as you care for me."

"Aw," Calumnia squealed while believing the obvious lie 100%. "That too cute for my heart to handle."

Diamond smiled. Out of pure luck, he has survived the ordeal and even obtained a harem of twenty or so zombies now. Some guys might be jealous, and they are rightfully so, but there is one thing I would like to reiterate:

Do not fuck a zombie.

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General Info Stats Spells Name: Daemonium Dissimulato Rex STR 24 Amare Species: 50% Demon + 50% Succubus DUR 27 Lovely Pheromones Lovely Kiss Age: 16yrs 54days INT 32 HP: 40/40 SPE 33 Level: 11 LCK 94 Exp: 1269/4096 CHR 154 Spells Known: 2