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To Become a God
Beginnings 3

Beginnings 3

Oh wow, he actually did get raped.

Pan was quite an unusual fellow. His family always encouraged an open expression of sexuality amongst everyone, and to always show it off proudly. By an open expression of sexuality, they meant to have sex with anything that sexually attracts you. And by having sex, they mean force them into it no matter what. And Pan was attracted to practically everything. Even trees. I don't know why the author mentioned that, but it's true.

Do you get it now? If not let me spell it out for you: Uppercase P-A-N-space-I-S-space-A-space-F-U-C-K-I-N-G-space-R-A-P-I-S-T-exclamation point. Now, do you get it? And how did this affect poor Stercus?

Intelligence stat increased +1 by special action

Well, he simply learned a new way to use his dick. Expected a bit more of a reaction but he was too bored to care for most, so the fact that he wasn't traumatized was extremely lucky. Then again the fact this happened in the first place is the complete opposite, so all of this culminates to just being whatever disaster this was.

But enough of that for now. The next day his training started. In the morning Krys taught him basic school subjects like math and reading to increase intelligence. In the afternoon he lifted small weights and ran laps to increase strength and speed. In the evenings, he was to practice taking a hit to increase durability. It was the most intense training he had in his life, except it wasn't that intense. It was just 3 hours of preschool, 30 minutes of relatively lax physical training, and a slap on the back to see if he could take it. Seeing how this was the most intense training in his life kind of shows how sheltered he was. Then again, it makes sense because Stershit was Stershit.

After getting his stats to just around 8 each, Krys took him out to the field to fight his first monster. Here, the more mature Stercus held up his blade to fight, while a basic blue slime hopped over to him. This was the most important moment of his life so far. To Stercus, this encounter was life or death. So, he took a deep breath, steadying his sword within his hands, and ran.

"What are you doing!?" Krys yelled. "You should be fighting the slime!"

Indeed he should, but Stercus was genuinely worried. After all, he never even fought before, with his older brother dying because he underestimated an opponent. On top of that, he never paid any real attention to Krys's lessons, only learning just enough to get him to an 8. Krys didn't know this so she was surprised at his slow growth. After all, kindergarteners tended to have an intelligence stat around 12, and you could get by as an adventurer with less than that. I don't know if it's because whoever made the system was idiotic, or they couldn't afford to get smart people, but if Stercus needed an intelligence boost to meet the minimum he was really dumb. And he was dumb enough to not know he didn't need any skill to defeat the slime; just one swing of the sword would be enough.

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"Stercus!" Krys yelled. "Kill the slime now!"

"I can't!" yelled a Stercus that was probably a mile away by now.

"Would you do it for a Scooby Snack?"

"Do what?" Stercus said, standing right next to Krys.

"When di-, nevermind, just swing your sword at the slime."

And he did.

Level up!

All stats raised +2

"Now do I get it?"

Krys threw a small treat over to Stercus, who caught it in his mouth like a dog. She sighed trying to think about this. Her party currently consisted of a Pervert, a Butt-Monkey, and her as an Only Sane Man (woman in this case). Even if they were suspiciously one character off from getting a comedic squad, were they really ready for this? She had gone on adventures with Pan before this, and it wasn't the best. Despite how helpful his strength would be, he would literally want to fuck everything in their way. This resulted in her doing all the busywork while more often than not he's trying to have sex with a goblin. At least he had enough HP and durability to make potential attacks moot but Krys wasn't as lucky, being forced to blast through everything.

She also desired to become a god one day, though always thought of it as a pipe-dream. Pan never had to worry about it though, as becoming god was just a matter of time for him. You see if the only way to become god was to reach level 100 this world wouldn't have nearly as many gods as it does now. The reason it does is that the gods have access to an exclusive spell called Promote. I'll give you three seconds to guess what it does.

.

..

...

If you guessed that it "promotes" people into gods, you are correct. Unfortunately, there are two main drawbacks to being promoted. The first is that each god can only use this spell once per month, so after one promotion they would need to wait 30 days before it can be used again. The second and most notable is just getting the god to notice you in the first place. Gods tended to promote close friends and family first, and even after that, they won't just save their spell for the right person. The gods would be much more likely to use promote on monsters, or even inanimate objects, just for shits and giggles.

Yes, this actually works. Multiple gods are just apples that have been promoted. That includes the gods and goddesses of death, birth, lightning, fire, fruit, harvest season, the sun, and even the god of not being able to find your keys to name a few. All of those gods are apples. Literal apples. That doesn't even take into account other objects, like the god of tornadoes being a stick or the god of metal being a stuffed toy.

Pan's older brother Hetero had become the God of Straightness. He proceeded to promote most of his brothers into gods as well, meaning Pan didn't really have to worry. He was only an adventurer to meet new people to have sex with. Krys and Stercus however, didn't have anyone to help them, so they needed to become gods the old-fashioned way: by becoming adventurers!

And it looked like their adventure was about to begin.

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General Info Stats Name: Stercus Pauls STR 10 Age: 13yrs 5days SPE 11 HP: 22/22 INT 10 Level: 2 DUR 10 Exp: 0/4 Spells Known: 0