After resting for a while Clint took off with the car leaving both of us alone. There was a car already there prepared for us if we needed to use it.

After washing up and helping Nat wash up and change, we laid in bed tired.

As usual, Nat was leaning on me as she sat up, our fingers intertwined.

“Have you used a gun before?” She asked me.

“No,” I replied as I rested my chin on her shoulders.

“How did you know how to use one?” She asked me.

“I have read up on enough guides and seen videos on how to use one along with having enough archery lessons to be good at aiming.

That is how I am. I see something or read about it in depth I can physically emulate it without much practice or training. Of course, I need to read about it or seen it in detail before I could perfectly do it.

Besides at that moment, I wasn’t thinking properly. My logical side took over to do everything for me.” I explained to her.

“Well, your logical side is hot.” She said as she turned her head towards me with a smile. Her wet red hair softly stroking my face.

I nibbled on her lips. “I hope my logical side comes out often for you then.”

“You remind me of a certain guy I know of. He could mimic the fighting style of any person he once saw fighting.” She told me.

“I can do that as well.” This earned a look of surprise from Nat’s face.

“Really?” She asked me not really believing my claims.

“Although it depends on how complex it is. The more complex and diverse a fighting technique is the longer it takes for me to mimic it. But usually, I should be able to mimic a complex fighting style back within 5 to 10 minutes of seeing it.” I told her.

Nat chuckled as she shook her head. “No, that person could do it instantly no matter how complex the style is.” She replied back, but I could see the slight relief in her face.

“Looks like you are not that bad guy, if you were, I would have to come and catch you.” She winked at me.

“I can be the bad guy for you if you want if it means you will come to get me no matter where I go,” I said as I kissed her neck between her hair and slowly moved up to ravish her lips with my lips.

We broke up after a while. “Let’s not do it. You will strain your stomach and open your wounds once more if we have sex right now. And I rather not leave you alone to go find the necessary chemicals and tools to close your wounds back up again.” I told her which disappointed her.

“Darn those Hydras, I was just healing up and would have been fine in a week. Now I have to wait a long time again because of them.” Nat cursed.

“Hydra? Which countries agents are they?” I acted on reflex. It seems like a part of me wanted to delay the truth longer and trick her into believing I didn’t know anything. A part of me wanted to be with her longer.

I was turning to be just like her slowly. I was trying to deny the reality and live in the false reality we both have concocted for ourselves.

Nat shook her head as she said. “They are not part of any countries.” She became quiet as she thought of how to put it in words for me.

“It is better to say they are the enemies of all humanity…” Natasha started explaining to me who Hydra was and their plans to take over the world and take away peoples freedom.

“The part where they worked with Nazi’s is enough for me to hate them not to mention the other things they did,” I told her to which Natasha nodded.

"So this means they aren't completely extinct like everyone believed then?" I asked her.

"Yeah, Fury will dig everything from that guy thanks to you." She leaned on me with a smile before she yawned.

“We really do need to sleep.” I smiled as I remembered we barely had 3 hours of sleep last night before the commotion.

“Can I sleep on you like this?” Nat was sat on my lap while I leaned against the bed frame.

“Anything for you.” I kissed her right cheek.

“Good night.” She comfortably leaned back on me. I wrapped my arms around her shoulders and went to sleep.

Just as I closed my eyes I thought I heard a rustling but that was it, it was just a thought. Ignoring it I went to sleep.

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“AHHH!” I heard a scream and woke up in panic just as I had fallen asleep.

My heart began racing as I looked down at Nat to see she was sleeping peacefully. I partially calmed down.

If it wasn’t Nat who screamed then who was it?

Employing the senses of the HE serum I noticed there was no one in the vicinity.

I gulped in trepidation. If my senses couldn’t detect the noise it must mean something supernatural in nature or…

‘Calm mind.’ My mind became calm as I realised it was just my brains' way of showing me my unstable mind, especially after all those killings and gruesome things I had done.

‘Off calm mind.’ I tried going back to sleep only to now clearly remember everything I have done so far. Every death I had caused, every moment of blood and guts in my hand. It was disgusting and horrible.

My mind was in a terrible state right now, projecting countless terrible scenarios of what might have happened.

Especially last night.

I had never taken a close look at a person’s face before killing them, but it was different yesterday. I was up close with that hydra agent before I blasted his brains out. His terrified face came in front of me.

I could hear him pleading to me to not kill him. ‘I was just brainwashed and just wanted to escape from Hydra.’ I could hear his voice crying in my mind. I could see it was him in the bed I had tortured before blasting his brains out with the gun.

It was all too vivid and clear.

I shook my head. This was bad. I couldn’t sleep unless I forced myself with my gifts now.

However, I decided enough was enough. There was a limit to pushing these emotions down. I needed to talk to someone, and…

“What happened?” Nat asked me as she woke up from my movement due to sleeping on top of me.

… who better to seek help other than the only person who could understand the state I was in. She was forced to suppress her feelings just like me but in a different way.

I got up after which I gently laid her on the bed. Then crawling onto the bed I laid next to her.

“Nat, I can’t sleep,” I told her in seriousness.

She looked at me in confusion before a look of realisation dawned on her face. “I see his face whenever I close my eyes. I see blood and death around me whenever I try to sleep. Please help me.” I broke down in front of her as I let it all out.

I wasn’t ashamed of breaking down in front of her because if I couldn’t show my weakness to her then who could I show it to. There was nothing wrong with appearing weak in front of the one you truly love because only they can bring you back up and strengthen you.

If you don’t tell them your feelings how are they supposed to understand you? So, I told her all my feelings and how vile and disgusted I felt about myself for taking life.

Besides, I rather appear weak and defenceless in front of her rather than a stranger who has 2 letters of the alphabet in front of their name and sat in a room with me.

She hugged me and soothed me like she would a baby as I recounted how mentally disturbed I was from killing and the torture.

As I finished I was layered in her warm embrace feeling safe and protected.

“David do you love me?” Nat asked me after a while.

I quickly answered her without any need to think. “Yes, I do! I love you!”

“Then what you did yesterday was to protect me. You protected the one you loved. It was either me or them.” She reasoned.

“But what if in the future I would have to kill again?” I asked her.

“If it is necessary, do it. If it is not, then try your best to find alternatives. If you can’t then it’s not your fault if they die, as you tried your best. You understand?” She asked me as she looked into my moist eyes.

“But…” I began but she stopped me with a hand on my mouth. I wanted to say I have killed for money, for my ego as Jack of all trades etc but she wouldn’t let me speak or say anything. It was as if she knew if I spoke it would be something she didn’t want to hear.

It is true what they say, women are unnaturally perceptive.

“I know what you did last night might feel unnatural. But every time you are forced to kill someone just think it’s for me. Okay?” It was her way of suggesting a coping mechanism for me. To think of every person, I killed as to make a better world for her.

She knew my heart even without seeing it.

She knew about my concerns and worry even without me telling her.

I buried my head onto her. ‘Why did you come into my life, Nat? I really don’t deserve you.’

I nodded like a child. “Thank you. I love you.”

“I love you too.” She said as she stroked my hair.

“Talk to me whenever you feel down, okay?” I acknowledged the woman, I love, quietly.

She started humming a song and I soon got lost in the melody of her voice and fell asleep.

For the first time in a long time, I slept peacefully without having the need to use calm mind or my gifts during sleep.

I woke up in the morning to see Nat sleeping comfortably.

I watched her sleeping so peacefully while hugging me. I wanted this moment to last forever. To be held in each other’s embrace and only needing each other.

Unfortunately, even though I could do it, Nat couldn’t. She would become hungry after waking up and that would mean me having to go make her something.

I didn’t disturb her and slowly got out of her hold without waking her up.

I lightly kissed her forehead. “Sleep well, my princess.”

I went downstairs to prepare some breakfast as I called Bruce. “Jeff I will be away for a while. Go take a long break until I call you back.” Saying that I hung up without letting him respond. This should be enough indication to the smart him I am around people where I couldn’t say his real name.

‘I had promised myself 1 more year. I will tell her within 1 year.’ I sighed. I shook my head and focused on breakfast.

There was more than enough ingredients in the fridge and shelves to make some breakfast. I began preparing some breakfast using them.

*Beep* I received a call on my phone.

“You okay Nat?” I asked seeing it was her calling me.

“Where are you?” She asked with slight worry.

“Downstairs making breakfast. Is everything okay?” I could hear her sigh in relief.

“Everything is fine. I just missed you.” I smiled hearing that. Looks like she is worried about me with my emotional breakdown and with the hydra agents issue yesterday.

“I will be up in 15 minutes.” Assuring her I placed the phone on speaker on the table. Her occasional laughter from our conversation making me smile as I stirred the pan.

“I am coming up,” I told her as I took the tray I had prepared the breakfast for her.

I hung up my phone as I went back to Nat.

“Good morning.” She smiled from the bed.

“Good morning.” I placed the tray on the table as I helped her up.

“Why didn’t you wake me?” I adjusted the pillows behind her.

“Right now, you need plenty of rest more than anything.” I got up and went to get the tray and gave it to her.

“You didn’t eat?” Natasha looked at the tray to see double to portion.

I climbed beside her and sat by her. Taking the tray from her hand and placing it in between both our laps. “I could wait to eat with you. Now say ahh…” I started feeding her.