"You must keep this between us."

"Sseeeeccccrrreeeetttsss cccaaaannn hhhuuuurrrtttt."

"I need you to trust me. To trust him." explained Sid. "I am missing far too much for the full equation, but I believed informing you of my current knowledge will help alleviate your aggression. I still believe that is true."

"IIIIIIII'mmmmmm sssssssttttiiiillll mmaaaaaadddd." Bakade snarled with a clear ache in her voice. "IIIIII ssssttttiiilllll fffeeeeeeelllll bbeeeeettttrrraaayyyyeeeddd."

"That is acceptable, as long as you let this pass without actively fighting." Sid stepped out towards the stairs leading to the main floor and peered around them. "It seems the others are gone. This is quite fortuitous for us, as we will need to pay a visit to Sentenza's wagon while he is away."

Bakade loomed over Sid. It seemed like she was teetering on the verge of attacking him or hugging him. Finally, she settled on setting a clawed hand on his shoulder.

Sid didn't react to her gesture as the two of them stayed silent for a brief moment. He was the first to break it by heading down the stairs.

"Let me ensure no one is currently in the kitchen. That place is now a risk and a benefit." he stated calmly.

"Bawk!"

Sid froze in place as he reached the bottom of the stairs and heard the cry of the resident chicken.

"Bakaw, ba bakaw." Nugget's feet clicked against the hard floor as she walked closer towards Sid.

The silvery AI turned towards her and bowed his head slightly. "Nugget. I did not expect to see you."

She stopped about three feet away from Sid and stared at him. She was so silent and still, it almost looked like she was a taxidermy chicken. Sid stared back with a near emotionless expression on his face.

"Is something the matter Nugget? You know I cannot understand you when you speak, correct?"

Nugget turned her head so that only one eye was staring at him. This made Sid take a step back, which she immediately followed to maintain the close distance they had between them.

"I do not understand. Did I do something wrong?" Sid gulped.

Up the stairs, Bakade was watching the interaction with interest. She leaned over the railing as Sid was confronted and made no indication that she would intervene. With her flaming eyes taking in the scene before her as nothing more than a passive observer.

Nugget turned back to face Sid. She cocked her head from one side to the other. Then she looked at the door, back to him, and up to Bakade. She made sure to look directly into both of their eyes with her stern gaze. Then, she strutted, like any other chicken would, around Sid to stand between him and the front door.

"I have a solution." suggested Sid. "Bawk once for yes, and twice for no." he paused and added, "Now, should we not go outside?"

Nugget's gaze turned from stern to murderous, and she pawed at the wood with her claw so violently that small bits of wood flew behind her. Sid immediately backed away from her until the railing from the stairs pressed into his back.

"I do not understand. I am trying to help us communicate, but it only seems to be enraging you more." Sid rationalized. "What exactly do you want me to do?"

Bakade smirked as Nugget launched herself towards Sid, and the AI tried to run the opposite direction.

----------------------------------------

"Does that make any more sense?"

I guess so, but I still think some controlled explosions could really make it more impressive.

"To fit in with your kickflips of course," teased Ted.

Huh...wait, yeah! Exactly. agreed Death as he picked at where his nose would be if he had any cartilage left. I mean, imagine small explosions as I do the sickest tricks on my board!

"So, did you imagine you'd be doing all these stunts for your retirement?" asked Ted as he couldn't help but smile.

Death put his hand on his chin and nodded slowly. Nope. I was never supposed to retire, and even if I'd somehow got an apprentice or something, I was so busy I'd never have time to think about anything but my job. There were a lot of logistics in ushering souls back into the cycle. If I messed up, it could mean the end of that piece of the world, and the whole balance could be thrown off.

"Just from making a single mistake? What?" scoffed Ted in shock.

Well theoretically, I guess. The balance of a world tends to be very tenuous. If things tip too far one way, everything else is bound to fall over to that side and right off the edge. Death mused. At least that's what I think. But that's not my problem! Death raised up his lantern and clacked his jaw together.

A case of content theft: this narrative is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.

click clack click

I'm trying out a new kind of laugh that I actually make physically, instead of just my huhuhu. he explained. A good laugh is supposed to be sort of a whole-body thing, right? With the whole side-splitting stuff, but the problem is, I don't have any sides to split!

click clack clickity clack

Ted rubbed his chin as he scrunched up his face. "I don't know. It almost seems too forced." He turned back towards Death, who was of course standing right behind him. With a smirk, Ted added, "Maybe if the joke was actually funny it would work better?"

What! That was a hilarious joke! Maybe you just don't get it. See, I have sides direction wise, but I don't have sides as in all the fleshy...

"Oh no, I got it," interrupted Ted as he turned around again. "It just could use some more work. Although, I will admit that you are better at jokes than Sid is. He just can't help but overexplain everything while he is in the middle of a joke. It always ends up turning into more of a lesson than a joke."

Hey! I know that isn't much, but a skeleton being funnier than a robot? I'll take it! Huhuhu. Death put a hand on Ted's shoulder as he added. At least you get something out of his jokes though. Better than someone who can't finish one because they're laughing at the punchline before they've told any of it.

"Sure, but what we're getting out of it isn't anything funny, which is kind of the point of a joke isn't it?" shrugged Ted.

Hmm...is that the point of comedy? Making people laugh? Isn't it supposed to be a sort of commentary on life?

"I gotta be honest with you Death. I really have no idea." Ted said nonchalantly. "I barely know anything about all this alcohol stuff. Comedy? Well, that's way out of my league. I just have that instinctual urge to laugh when I think something is really funny. I couldn't tell you why it was funny though. Just if something was funny or if something wasn't. So, whether it's a reflection of society or some brief relief we get from the pain of living, I really have no clue."

Bro, that's pretty deep.

Ted seemed flustered all of a sudden. "Huh? Wha? what do you mean. I just, I don't know..."

Death crossed his arms over his sweet Bad to the Bone t-shirt and nodded sagely. Heck yeah. Like analyzing stuff to death is pointless. You just have to grab life in the moment and live it to the max.

"I uh...I think you're reading into what I said a little too much." sighed Ted as Death seemed to have grabbed onto something far beyond anything he had actually said.

"Still acting like a fool on the eve of battle?"

Death turned the lantern towards the voice as he and Ted looked to their left. Trizel was pushing his way through the trees with a frustrated sneer on his face.

"Trizel!" said Ted as he felt a wave of relief wash over him. "I had a feeling you'd be in here, but how did you find us?"

"Find you?" scoffed Trizel as he used a hand to push his wet hair straight back and out of his face. "You are both being so loud, I would be surprised if anything in this entire forest would have trouble knowing right where you were."

'Sup.

Trizel sighed as he put his hand over his face. Then, he held a single finger up to silence the two of them. "Before you say anything, I am still just as furious. We are in a terrible situation, and the one with the most information refuses to say anything. He sees fit to leave us in the dark for some grand scheme that I doubt I would even agree with."

"But..."

As Ted started to speak, Trizel called out. "Silence! I am not finished." The giant took in a deep breath and shook his head as he let it out in a deep sigh. "But I could not leave the two of you alone as such prime targets for our assailant. You are fools for blindly trusting another with our futures, but you do not deserve to be caught out alone during an invasion just for that."

Is it an invasion when it's just like one guy?

"Do you know it is one being?" asked Trizel as he looked up towards Death, but he wasn't there. Trizel quickly turned around, and Death was standing behind him. "You also seem awfully silent when you move. Fast too. You did not attack the others, did you?"

clickity clack clack click

Huhuhu. That's pretty funny. Death tried out his old laugh mixed with his jaw clacking. I can't fight at all. I never killed a single soul. I just picked them up when they were done with their whole mortal deal.

Death paused as he tapped his chin and turned his head up. In fact, he mused, I was more like a bus driver instead of some killing machine. Or like a package delivery boy. Yeah! That's it. A good analogy, just the world would be out of wack if my delivery took too long or went to the wrong place.

"So you say." mused Trizel as he squinted at Death.

"I wouldn't worry about him Trizel." interjected Ted. "He just appears places, but he also isn't the most dexterous guy ever. There's no way he could've avoided Bakade, Sid, and Sentenza, without at least getting torn up pretty bad. I mean, I can't imagine him really being more than a nuisance to them."

Whoa! I could totally like put up one heck of a fight bros.

"Like when Trizel threw that chair at you? Or while you were practicing that kickflip, and kept falling down?"

That's not a fair comparison! Trizel's like insanely ripped, and balancing on a skateboard is crazy hard, let alone trying to do a sick kickflip...which you remember I totally pulled off at the end, right?

Ted smirked as he nodded. "Yeah, I definitely saw you pull it off."

Death did a fist pump into the air while Trizel sighed. "I suppose you have a point," he murmured. "He may just be pretending to throw us off, but it is hard to believe. Especially seeing all but Sid in some kind of combat."

Wait! Death called out. I just realized those kids that came after me. It was even worse, since I was just the delivery boy. They really didn't do their homework.

"I would suspect your absence would make their situation much clearer. Same with the fools who came for me." Trizel said before he grit his teeth. "I weep for my poor skyborne isles, but I hope those children are forced to live with the blood of the ensuing chaos and wars on their conscience for generations to come. Even that is too good for such short-sighted fools."

Ted rubbed the back of his neck. His absence definitely didn't make anything worse for the world. In fact, it was more likely that a lot of people's lives were improved now. I mean, he was really nothing more than a glorified leech. A shadow in the background that gummed up the works, but with him gone that is one less drain society would have to worry about. While they talked, he couldn't help but smile morbidly as he couldn't imagine his family really feeling sad at all. They'd show the customary amount for the loss of a son or brother in public of course, but inside. No, inside they'd be grateful. Leaping for joy that at least he was gone. No more annoying Ted. No more failure Ted. No more example of what can happen if you constantly fail.

Of course, that's if they thought he died at all. Maybe he would hang over as a specter for the rest of their lives. He doubted any body was left behind with how he got sucked in. Maybe they'd live in fear that one day he'd show back up and ask for help. That they'd have to not only see him again, but feel the full brunt of familial obligation thrust onto their head.

Ted!

"Ted!"

Ted shook his head as Death and Trizel were both shaking him back and forth. It seemed he had gotten lost in his own thoughts again. That probably wasn't a good sign since the same thing happened so publicly earlier today. Although only Death had seemed to notice.

"Sorry," muttered Ted. "I seemed to kind of zone out there a bit."

Bro, that's probably not a good thing.

"I am afraid I must agree. You seemed to be lost to the entire world there for a few minutes." agreed Trizel as his look of anger from earlier had been replaced with one of genuine concern. "This is not the time to drift away from reality. An enemy is in the castle, and we must do what we can to stay sharp."

"It wasn't that bad, was it?" Ted said with a fake smile.

I mean, it was just a few minutes, but bro. Death sighed and shook his head. It's like you're glimpsing into some other world or something.

"You cannot travel through these realms with your mind can you Ted?" asked Trizel as he tried to appraise his friend. "You would tell me if you discovered this kind of ability would you not?"

Ted shook his head. "No, it's nothing like that. I just..." Ted sighed as he hung his head. This happened to him quite frequently back in his old world. It was definitely not any secret ability. His mind just seemed to easily fall into a kind of downward spiral of worry that immobilized him. It could last for most of a day if he didn't catch it soon enough, but sometimes...well, sometimes there was just nothing he could do. He would imagine worse and worse situations and the worry would paralyze him as he blinded himself to the outside world.

"I just get a little lost in my own mind now and then," Ted laughed, "Hahahaha." But it didn't sound anything close to genuine.

Death handed Trizel the pack on his back. Well, here's a fresh outfit for you. I even got new socks in there! Death turned to Ted and slowly nodded. And Ted, if you ever need a guide to help you get out of that mind of yours, well I do have a lantern after all! huhuhu

Trizel sighed as he grabbed the sack. "For once it seems I agree with the undead. We cannot fix things, but you can rely on us if you need to. Or even if you just want to. You have more strength than you give yourself credit. Your standing here now is more than proof of that."