Chapter One Hundred and Ten

They had emerged on the other side of Asher’s house, overlooking the backyard. As it had been the last time Lila was here, there was the pool, beautifully sculpted gardens, a gazebo, and an entertainment area with a fire pit across the expansive yard. But unlike the last time she was here, there was, undeniably, a well-decorated and well-cushioned picnic set in between the pool and fire pit.

She instantly turned to Asher, shock etched on her face.

“Surprise,” he smiled, though his hands looked rather shaky. “I thought… we could go for a walk… to a picnic.”

“A picnic?” Lila repeated, spinning around to face the picnic. Her heart drummed in her chest as she continued to stare in that direction.

“Yeah,” Asher stated. “There’s a heater out there, so you don’t need to worry about being cold.”

‘That’s… not what I’m concerned about at all,’ Lila thought as she started to walk towards it. ‘A sunset walk and now a picnic?’

“Mixing it up,” Asher added bashfully. “We have been staring at the TV for a while.”

“I-I guess,” Lila replied, wringing her hands nervously together. Her mind was jumping to all sorts of conclusions. But… surely, two friends could enjoy a picnic together? Platonically, right?

Lila approached the setup, taking in the classic red gingham picnic blanket, various arrays of camellias, cyclamens with soft pink roses in tasteful jars, soft-looking pink and cream cushions, and two small space heaters on opposite sides of the blanket. A wicker basket stood towards the left, and it appeared that a charcuterie board, complete with cheeses, fruits, and deli meats, was already sitting in the middle of the blanket, waiting patiently to be eaten. A steaming pot of tea sat to the right, near one of the heaters, and small lanterns were dotted here and there, though none of them were on at the moment.

“Wow,” she uttered, taking another sweeping look at it all.

“Do… you like it?” Asher asked, his voice sounding oddly breathless. She lifted her eyes to meet his and was struck by how red his face was.

“Yeah,” she responded automatically, carefully taking off her shoes. “Now that I’m looking at it all, I feel hungry.”

Asher’s entire body seemed to relax as he laughed, taking off his own shoes. He looked rather relieved as he settled into a spot near the teapot. Lila sat next to the other space heater, eyeing the charcuterie board.

“I love prosciutto,” she grinned, rolling up a small amount and popping it into her mouth. Asher immediately poured her a cup of tea, which she gratefully accepted. The space heater was doing an excellent job of ensuring she wasn’t too cold, but the tea warmed her much more efficiently as she took a sip.

“So, Mr Planner,” Lila said after a few seconds of contented silence. “This looks rather impressive. Any particular reason?”

Of course, Lila was angling as much as she could to see what Asher thought of the picnic – whether it was simply platonic… or something more.

“There’s a reason,” Asher replied candidly. He paused, sighing deeply before opening the wicker basket. “Sandwich?”

“The… reason is sandwich?”

Asher hung his head, a laugh escaping his lips. “Yes, Lila. The reason is sandwich,” he finally managed to say, smiling widely at her. She could tell that he was joking around and returned his smile with a similar one of her own.

“Let’s eat the charcuterie board stuff first,” Lila suggested. “Those grapes are looking mighty tasty.”

Asher closed the basket again, heeding her suggestion and reaching for a slice of cheese and a cracker. They proceeded to demolish said charcuterie board, though Asher’s unsatisfying answer to her question played heavily on her mind. What was the reason?

“Is… it your birthday?” she asked suddenly. He stared at her, his mouth slightly falling open.

“Not even close,” he eventually said with a chuckle. “More tea?”

“I’m good, thanks.”

“Noted.”

Lila sipped her tea once more, surveying Asher carefully. Should she ask again? He was certainly deftly avoiding her probing questions.

“Have you thought more about what we should do about Elise and Isaac?” Asher queried, avoiding her eyes as he plucked a couple of grapes from the mostly empty bunch.

“Sort of,” Lila answered, looking down at her slice of cheese atop her cracker. She shoved it in her mouth and chewed thoughtfully. She swallowed, meeting his eyes. “I think it’s mostly down to Isaac at this point.”

“You reckon Isaac should make the first move?”

“Well, not that Elise is incapable of making the first move, but she’s giving him signs that he’s just missing.”

“That’s true.”

“Did you talk to him about offering to go to watch that romcom with her?”

“Sure did. He said that he considered it at the time but thought that asking her with all of us there was a bit awkward. Especially if she said no.”

“Not that she’d say no,” Lila sighed, drinking the rest of her tea. Asher dangled the teapot towards her and she extended her cup out for him to top it up. He placed the teapot off the picnic blanket this time.

“Just worried about knocking it over,” he explained, evidently following her questioning eyes which had focused on the teapot’s new location.

“Fair.”

“Any other ideas?”

“Besides the museum date idea? I mean… we could see how they interact at Maccas and see if it’s possible to set them up on shift.”

“Feel like that’s hard to achieve as a customer.”

“You’re right,” Lila sighed despondently. “Do you have any ideas?”

“I’ve… been thinking about other things,” Asher confessed, opening the wicker basket again. “Sandwich?”

“Clearly you’ve been thinking about sandwiches,” Lila laughed, holding a hand out. “Chuck us one.”

Asher peered into the basket before carefully selecting one and passing it to Lila. It was a cucumber and cream cheese sandwich, which she delightedly bit into. He watched her for a moment, a small smile on his face, before picking up a sandwich for himself.

“You’re not cold, are you?” he asked, swallowing harshly.

“Very toasty,” Lila replied with a smile. “Don’t worry about me.”

“I… see.”

After a while of eating, chatting, and joking about all manner of things – the game they were playing, the videos they’d been watching, assignments they’d been given, and everything in between – Asher grew serious.

“So…” he gulped audibly before glancing up at the sky, which had begun to be streaked in strips of violet, pink, red, and orange against the greyish blue that still dominated most of it. “So… I bet you’re still wondering…”

“Wondering?” Lila sipped her last remaining drop of tea before setting her cup aside, her attention otherwise utterly devoted to Asher.

“The reason,” he said plainly.

“For the picnic?”

Asher nodded. Lila looked at him expectantly, waiting for him to continue.

“I… well. I was wondering… if… ah, shit, this is scary,” he muttered, wiping his hands on a napkin, his body language jittery. Lila didn’t interrupt him, though her heart was racing. He sighed, shaking his head.

“Alright. I was wondering if… if you’d do me the honour of… being my girlfriend?” he asked earnestly, his eyes resting on hers for half a second before looking upwards again, his face matching the reds that now ruled the sky. He took a deep, shaky breath, wincing as though bracing himself for something unpleasant.

The question he posed knocked the air out of her lungs. She couldn’t believe her ears. Surely, she’d misheard.

But the pounding of her heart, the heat of her face, and the swooping of her stomach convinced her otherwise. She hadn’t misheard. He’d… actually asked. He wanted her to be his girlfriend.

Words failed her, ecstatic joy overriding all control of her body as she sat there, giddiness burning through her veins.

“Please… say something,” he whispered, still avoiding her gaze. “I mean, you can say no if you want… was I… too late?”

His voice broke at the end of his sentence and, though he was looking elsewhere, she could tell his anxiety was flowing off him, shrouding him like a thick cloud. He looked smaller, somehow, as he fidgeted with his hands. As though noticing this was the trigger, her body suddenly lurched forward, her hands instantly gripping onto his shirt.

“Wh-”

His question was cut off by her lips pressing onto his and he fell backwards, taking her with him. Lila closed her eyes, the feeling of his mouth against hers being something to relish. It felt so natural, as though their lips were made for the express purpose of fitting together. His lips were incredibly soft – divine, even – and this feeling… if she wasn’t careful, she’d become addicted.

His left hand leapt to the small of her waist, as if by instinct, whilst he returned her kiss, his mouth moving against hers like a dance that she knew the choreography to. His right hand made its way to the back of her head, wrapping his fingers in her silky strands, pulling her even closer to him.

She broke away, breathing heavily, her face hotter than the space heater next to Asher, using her arms to prop herself up on his chest. He immediately brought his right arm across his eyes, a grin wider than any she’d ever received from him previously sitting just below his arm. His chest was also heaving, as though struggling to catch his breath again.

“S-Sorry,” Lila stammered, letting go of his shirt and patting where her nails had dug into it. “I- sorry. I didn’t mean to just-”

Asher lifted the arm that covered his eyes, using that hand to caress her jaw, sending electric sparks down her neck and dispersing throughout her body, his eye contact intense and magnetic. “Is that a yes?”

Lila’s eyes began to water, the realisation that, in this moment, her longing dream had finally come to fruition, hit her hard. “Yes,” she whispered, the power in that simple word dizzying her mind. “Yes, a million times yes. I’ll be your girlfriend.”

He curled his hands around her waist again, pulling her down into a hug. “Yes,” he repeated, the relief and sheer happiness ringing like a victory trumpet in his voice. Lila melted against his chest, his sturdy arms wrapping around her even more tightly. Though she wasn’t against his heart, the strength and absolute speed of his heartbeat had made its way to where her ear connected with his body. Was this a dream? Wishful thinking turned into an impressively realistic hallucination?

They laid like that for a while, before Lila realised that her tears had overflowed onto his polo. She sat up again, his hands drifting down her body as she did so.

“S-Sorry,” she stammered again, pointing ashamedly at the wet spots she’d left. As though pointing it out entirely lifted the lid on her tears, even more fell, taking her by total surprise.

Asher bolted upright, concern overtaking any other emotion on his face. “Everything okay?” he asked in a low voice, reaching for an unused napkin and handing it to her. She gave him a weak, watery smile, dotting her eyes with the napkin.

“Everything’s perfect,” she whispered, her shoulders shaking in stark contrast to her words.

“… I feel like crying isn’t usually a part of the whole… getting into a relationship thing,” he said gently, his tone conveying the confusion he was obviously feeling.

‘It’s happy tears,” Lila insisted, squeezing her eyes shut before opening them again. “I… I’d almost thought-”

“It’d never happen? I… thought that’d be the case,” Asher grimaced as Lila nodded, confirming this statement. “I- sorry. I just… really wanted to do right by you. Make it something special. To… make up for laughing at you.”

Lila stared at him before smiling again. “Consider yourself wildly successful.”

He glanced at Lila, his face breaking into a similar smile. “I… I’m glad. I’ve been a bit stressed, thinking about how best to do this. I thought about going to a nice restaurant, but I thought… it might mean more if I did the ‘do over’ at mine. Since… this is where you told me the best thing I’d ever heard.”

“Best thing?”

“Yeah,” Asher nodded sincerely. “That you liked me.”

Lila smiled once more. “This was perfect, Asher.”

“Hearing you say that… blows my mind, to be honest,” he chuckled. “I kinda thought I’d missed the boat and waited too long.”

“I told you that I’d wait for as long as it took.”

“I know, I know… but… I realised the other day when I said I wanted to do things for you… that even though I’d decided that I was going to ask you to be mine, you didn’t know that. And I was probably being a dick again, playing with your heart.”

Lila couldn’t deny this. “I mean… kinda.”

“I knew it,” he sighed. “I’m really sorry.”

“You’ve more than made up for it,” Lila said firmly.

He grinned at her before looking around the picnic set up. “Still hungry?” he asked, rifling through the wicker basket.

“No,” Lila shook her head, “I’m good.”

“Alright. It’s getting a bit dark, so if you want, we can… go back?”

“Sounds good,” Lila replied, getting to her feet. “Are we bringing this in?”

“Nah,” Asher said, sounding slightly awkward. “Marlene insisted that she’d clean it up. Said she’d tell my Dad I didn’t let her do her job if I didn’t.”

“Marlene? So, she knew you were going to ask?”

“Of course,” Asher chuckled, getting to his feet as well. “Her and Gabriel. That’s why Gabriel’s here. They’ve been absolutely instrumental in all of this. I mean, did you see me sneak out here to set up the picnic?”

Lila laughed. “Of course not. I’ll have to thank them.”

She dusted herself off and put her shoes on. As she did so, lights automatically flooded the backyard.

“Motion detected,” Asher explained as she shielded her eyes. “Sorry.”

“They’re handy when I’m expecting it,” Lila said, lowering her hand now that her eyes had adjusted. “Don’t worry about it.”

Asher stood next to her, seeming suddenly unsure of himself. Lila glanced at him before her eyes trailed down to his hands… the hands that she’d been desperate to hold for weeks now. Surely… it’d be okay to hold his hand?

As if he’d been thinking the exact same thing, he tentatively held out his hand to her, clearly inviting her to do so. She beamed, eagerly placing her hand in his. It was warm and significantly bigger than hers, his skin feeling soft against hers. She interlocked her fingers between his, the feeling sending more sparks through her body. She… was holding Asher’s hand. As his girlfriend. Finally, she was able to touch him without fearing that she was weird or overstepping. That alone felt glorious.

They set off towards the house, falling easily into step with one another. As they crossed the lawn, an incredibly important question rose in Lila’s mind – one that needed to be answered as soon as possible, or else she’d go crazy.

“… So… uh, are we… gonna keep it a secret?” Lila’s hand twitched in his grasp as she said this, a twinge of disappointment gripping her heart. He’d hidden Holly… and only revealed it because he was forced to. So… would he want to do the same with Lila? She wanted to tell the world – share this miracle of happiness that she’d found herself in, with the boy she’d liked more than anyone else. After so much yearning and heartache… how could she keep it a secret?

He stopped in his tracks, his hand still tenderly wrapped around hers. He gently pulled her towards him, though she continued to avoid looking at his face for fear of betraying her true feelings on the matter. He chuckled, using his free hand to lightly lift her chin. Their eyes met, and Lila’s breath hitched in her throat. His eyes looked to be brimming with tears, his unrestrained elation manifesting in a look so blazing and earnest that she wasn’t so sure anymore that she wasn’t dreaming.

“A secret?” he whispered, his eyes flickering to her lips. “Lila, if I could tell every star in this universe, I would. If I keep it a secret, how can I be sure that it’s real?”

His thumb trailed along her jaw, a rush of tingles bursting along her skin. He seemed to hesitate before leaning down, capturing her lips in his. Lila was again struck by how soft his lips were, her left hand gently touching the hand still clutching her face. Then, all too quickly, just as Lila’s knees began to buckle and head started to spin, he broke away, his face fire-engine red.

“S-Sorry,” he murmured breathlessly. “I- hoo. This is…”

Lila stumbled, holding his shoulders to steady herself, her face akin to a red-hot flame, the butterflies in her stomach stealing any remaining breath in her lungs. It felt as though she’d forgotten English entirely, her mind racing with the lingering sparks of pleasure from their kiss. She hid her face behind her hands, shyness suddenly taking control. It seemed that words failed Asher, too, as he remained still as a statue whilst Lila regained her bearings. After a painful few seconds, she nodded.

“… Fast,” she finally whispered. “I-It’s okay. I don’t want to pressure you.”

Of course, she wanted to feel his lips against hers again and again and again. But… if he wasn’t comfortable with that, then she was happy to hold onto the memories of the two kisses she’d already shared with him that night.

“Not necessarily fast,” he murmured, picking up her hand again and intertwining his fingers with hers. He used his thumb to gently rub the back of her hand, as though it helped him think. “But… we can call it that.”

Lila looked at him curiously, only to find that his face was cherry-red, his eyes darting away from hers the instant they met. He took a deep breath before reluctantly letting go of her hand.

“Just give me a minute,” he said softly. “This back door can be tricky sometimes.”

He led her to a set of large sliding doors, which connected a tiled patio directly to the house near the stairs leading up to Asher’s wing. Lila had never gone through this way even though it felt more natural to head into the backyard from here. As he unlocked the doors, the thought bothered her. He slid open the door with a grin and he gestured for her to head inside.

“Why’d we go out the front doors?” she asked, the sudden question dropping his smile for just a second. It returned, accompanied by a light laugh.

“If we went out the back, you’d have seen the picnic right away. I was kinda freaking out and needed the walk to keep my cool,” he explained, taking his shoes off and placing them neatly inside. She did the same, and he collected her hand once more, rubbing his thumb along hers.

She couldn’t stop her smiling, even as they walked through his house, still holding hands. In fact, her cheeks were starting to hurt but she didn’t mind. In that way, she knew for certain that this was real.

“Hello, Mr Wagner, Lila,” Marlene’s voice called from the kitchen and they both headed towards her. She wiped her hands on her tea towel before adding, “A pleasant walk and picnic, I take it?”

“Very,” Lila grinned. “Thank you for helping to set it up.” She felt Asher squeeze her hand for a moment, as if in approval.

“Excellent,” Marlene beamed, her eyes clearly flashing towards their joined hands. “You’re most welcome, Lila. Gabriel has departed for the evening, but he’ll return for breakfast. I trust that you’re not particularly hungry now, but we do have extra pumpkin soup and bread if you’d like. Let me know and I can warm it up for you.”

With another smile, Marlene left the kitchen, passing them serenely and continuing towards the back of the house and through the doors they just entered from. Lila let him lead her by the hand and they entered the rumpus room with a simultaneous sigh. Lila could only guess what his meant but, for her, hers was one of pure relief and delight.

“Well… i-if you’re staying the night…” Asher spoke up, his face turning redder by the second. “Uh, I mean, you don’t have to, but I kinda wanna get out of these clothes. T-To put on pyjamas. Be, um, comfortable.”

Lila tried to contain her smile, though it didn’t work. She hadn’t expected what Asher would be like as her boyfriend, but his flustered stumbling was endearing. Not that she wasn’t still prone to that herself.

“Yeah, I’ll get changed too,” Lila nodded, gently letting go of his hand and turning to the spare room.

As she changed, neatly folding her clothes back into her bag, a possibility that she’d never considered occurred to her. Now that they were official… was he expecting that she’d share his bed tonight?

‘Oof, calm down,’ Lila urged herself, spinning away from the mirror so she couldn’t catch her startled reflection within it. ‘He wanted to slow it down a bit… so, surely not.’

She finished pulling on her pyjamas, ensuring her bra was still clipped on. She was eager to, as a start, just see him again. Sleeping arrangements could come later, and it wasn’t as though the spare room was uncomfortable. She slipped out of the spare room and found him already sitting on the couch, his hair messy once again, wearing a thin t-shirt and snug-looking plaid pyjama pants.

“Hey,” he said once she sat down in her usual spot. “Comfy?”

“Yeah,” she grinned. He hesitated for a second before scooting slightly closer.

“I think I’m ready to finish that game,” he said playfully, leaning forward to pass her a set of joycons. “Ready to see the end?”

“Only if you’d stop dying so much,” Lila replied just as playfully.

“Roger that.”

On one hand, it felt as though nothing had changed at all as they flew through the game’s last dungeon. It was just as it normally was. Except, somehow, without meaning to, they drew closer and closer together until their thighs were touching. Asher was really warm, as usual, and the feeling of his body against hers – even just the smidge that this was – was pleasantly sending her heart rate up. It granted her a rush that was definitely far better than the ending of this game.

Once it was over, they switched back over to YouTube, watching a video or two of a deep dive into the lore of the game they just finished. Neither commented on the fact that they were subtly touching, though every time she took a peek at Asher, his face looked just as rosy as hers felt.

Eventually, three sharp knocks sounded on the door and Asher heaved himself to his feet, shuffling over that way.

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“Hello again, Mr Wagner. You got here quick,” Marlene’s saccharine voice floated through the open doorway. Asher evidently didn’t want to respond to that comment as he silently stood aside to let her in.

In Marlene’s hands was a quaint collection of brownies, cupcakes, chocolates, and other varieties of dessert upon a silver tray. She placed it on the kitchenette counter before almost making her way to the door.

“Just some evening desserts, in case you were feeling peckish. Goodnight, Mr Wagner and Lila. I hope you have a… good evening,” she said sweetly, bowing herself out of the doorway, the door swinging shut behind her.

Asher and Lila both stared at the door for a moment, as if worried she would return. When she didn’t, Asher relaxed his posture, inviting Lila to take a look at the tray.

She selected a few goodies and Asher carefully placed them on a plate for her. They returned to the couch, but both stood somewhat awkwardly instead of taking a seat.

“Um, did you… wanna watch a movie?” Asher suggested, taking a bite of his brownie.

“Sure,” Lila replied softly, still standing. He tentatively sat down, and she took her place right beside him a little too quickly. She felt him shake as if in laughter, though he didn’t produce a sound – possibly because he’d inhale his brownie and choke on it if he did.

They browsed the movie selections until mutually choosing an action comedy. Truthfully, Lila didn’t care what they watched. Revelling in his company was all she needed.

Slowly, as the movie played, Asher seemingly melted into the couch, becoming horizontal. Lila looked down at where his head was now touching her outer thigh and was suddenly tempted to nestle herself right against his chest. Was that… too much? Too soon?

He looked up at her, a nervous smile on his face.

“If… you want, you can lie down, too,” he offered meekly. Lila’s heart skipped a beat.

“There?” she asked, pointing at the pocket of space next to his torso.

“U-U-Uh, o-only if you want,” he stammered, his face bright red once more. He immediately squished himself further into the couch cushions to give her more space.

Now that she’d asked… well, she couldn’t back down, even though her mind was running through the various ways she could backpedal.

‘No,’ she told herself firmly, ‘don’t wimp out.’

With a tentative smile, she stood up, moving so that she could lie down next to him. It felt as though her breathing had stopped altogether, and she wasn’t quite convinced that he was breathing either. Then, as she settled in, leaving as much of a gap as she could so as to not make him uncomfortable, she heard him release one long and low breath, tickling her ear. She felt him reach over and pull the blanket she’d used earlier that day towards them.

“Here,” he said softly, sitting up slightly so he could fluff it over the both of them. “In case you get cold.”

There was no way that Lila was feeling cold under these circumstances. But it was certainly rather comfy, sharing a blanket whilst being so close to Asher. She could tell, though, that her face was burning up, her heart pumping furiously in her chest - as if it were raging that she wasn’t even closer.

The movie continued, with neither moving except to laugh or otherwise react to what was happening. That was until Lila felt an arm gently creeping over her shoulder.

She stiffened in suspense – what was he planning to do?

In any event, she was glad that her face was away from Asher – she wasn’t quite ready to reveal how giddy she was about the circumstances that she'd found herself in.

“Sorry,” he murmured, retracting his arm. “I just… feel this overwhelming urge to hold you.”

Was this what heaven felt like? Nothing could’ve prepared her for the idea that he wanted to touch her too. Sure, she was aware that he liked her… but this was different, somehow.

“Hold me,” she whispered, curling the blanket under her chin. “If you want.”

There was no movement for a second before Lila felt his arm return, holding her securely across her shoulders. Being cocooned against Asher like this… well, she wasn’t quite prepared to say she could die happy, but perhaps tiptoeing the veil between life and death in a state of bliss. Besides, if she did die, she wouldn’t be able to experience more of his touch.

She felt incredibly safe in his arms, his warmth inviting her to close her eyes and enjoy this tender moment. It’d be okay to just rest them, right?

----------------------------------------

Lila slowly opened her eyes, noticing, with a jump, that her head had just been buried in Asher’s chest. She’d evidently turned around at some point in her sleep, no longer caring about keeping a gap between them.

Though slightly embarrassed at the fact that she did that, she hoped that he was still asleep and wouldn’t have realised this.

As if on cue, she heard a low, breathy chuckle just above her head, his chest rumbling in response.

“You’re awake,” Asher whispered, bringing a hand to the top of her head, smoothing down her hair. It sent a rush of goosebumps over her, as though showering her in gentle kindness.

“I-I guess so,” Lila replied, also in a whisper, her face almost glowing with both shyness and mortification. “What time is it?”

“Dunno. Morning, sometime. I… didn’t want to move to check.”

His hand moved from the top of her head down to her cheek, caressing it. It felt almost as though his hand was a cloud with how careful and soft his touch was.

“Were you awake for long?” Lila asked, not daring to move in case he’d stop.

“No,” he responded sincerely. “Though I did wake up during the night briefly. Thought I was hallucinating until I squeezed you and you snorted.”

Lila wasn’t quite sure what to make of that but felt that it was sweet enough to earn a giggle in return.

“Yeah, like that,” he said teasingly. “After that, though, I fell asleep again… Easily the best sleep of my life.”

She hadn’t realised how much his saying that would relieve her. Truthfully, she’d been worried, day after day, about how he was sleeping after finding out about his recurring night terrors. Though, surely this sleeping arrangement wasn’t comfortable…

“You should’ve woken me up and gone to bed,” Lila said, her tone concerned. “Sleeping like this must’ve been uncomfortable.”

“Not at all,” Asher insisted. “It’s like I’ve been floating among the clouds all night. Besides… I didn’t know whether you’d, uh, be… well, I didn’t know whether you’d want to join me in my bed, or sleep in the spare room… so I guess I wanted to take advantage of the fact that you were sleeping here with me. In case you weren’t comfortable going to bed with me. T-To sleep. Nothing else. Nothing funny, and especially nothing without consent-”

“Asher,” Lila laughed, reaching a hand up to touch his face, though she couldn't see it very well from this angle. “I was worried about the exact same thing.”

“A-As in you didn’t want to sleep with me? I-In my bed. Like, to sleep?”

Lila shook her head, her subsequent laughter even louder than before. “No. I was worried you wouldn’t be comfortable with me sleeping in your bed.”

“You managed to articulate that so much better than me,” Asher stated morosely, looking incredibly embarrassed. “I keep stumbling.”

“It’s fine,” Lila asserted. “You can stumble. I stumble too.”

Asher sighed. Then, he brought a hand to the back of her head, cradling it gently. Unlike yesterday, her ear was pressed right up against his chest and she could hear his heartbeat loud and clear. Even though his actions felt calm, his heartbeat betrayed him – it was incredibly fast, and she could almost feel it thumping against his ribcage.

Lila smiled, feeling far more comforted that he wasn’t quite so cool and collected as he was portraying – even if he was candid about his stumbling.

“I guess… what the takeaway should be,” she murmured into his chest, “is that I’m happy… to share your bed, next time I stay over. I-If you want me to.”

Asher pulled her even closer to him by her waist. “You sure?”

She nodded, squeezing her eyes tightly, allowing her senses to fully feel his body against hers.

A second or two passed, just like this, before he kissed the top of her head. “Alright. If… if you’re sure.”

Lila was about to say something in return when the intercom burst into life, causing both Lila and Asher to jump.

“Good morning,” Gabriel’s voice cooed into the intercom. “If you’re awake, I’d like to know if you’d like breakfast.”

Lila reluctantly sat up to give Asher room to stand and respond to Gabriel via the intercom.

“Yeah, we’re awake,” Asher said as he pressed the ‘talk’ button. “Breakfast sounds great. Thanks, Gabriel.”

“My pleasure.”

Asher returned to Lila on the couch, seeming uncertain about where or how he should sit. She patted the space next to her and he smiled, sitting down. Their legs were again touching and Asher reached forward for a set of joycons, scrolling through YouTube for a video to watch while they waited for breakfast to be ready.

“I… had a question,” Lila piped up, twirling her hair through her fingers absentmindedly.

“Yeah?” Asher replied, resting the controllers on his lap and giving her his full attention.

“Well… just… why did you decide to ask me now? Why not later? Or… earlier?”

Asher rubbed his face, exhaling loudly. “I… figured this would come up.”

“Sorry… you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to,” Lila said hurriedly, looking fixedly at her knees.

“I want to answer. It’s just… complicated, I guess. When you told me you liked me and I turned you down for a relationship, I kicked myself over and over again about it. I wasn’t with Holly anymore, and I liked you a hell of a lot then. Still do, of course. Probably even more now, if that was ever possible... It seemed like it would be obvious that we should get together. But I still had to process what Holly did to me. I’d been processing it in the background, but I didn’t have any real reason to actually confront it properly. Until… until you were brave. Much braver than I’d been – I liked you for years and years, but never told you. Never even thought I should try…” he trailed off, taking the joycons off his lap entirely and turning his whole body to face her.

“Then, we saw Holly at the shops. I felt nothing when I saw her – like she could’ve been literally any random stranger on the street, not my first girlfriend who cheated on me and broke me. It confused me for a while until it started to excite me – that my mind was telling me that I was ready. But… it terrified me too. What if I was just kidding myself? What if I was rushing, because I didn’t want to disappoint you? Or, worse still, that I’d treat you like a rebound and then decide it wasn’t for me. Then… I got taken to Vanuatu. I wasn’t kidding when I said that I got you a gift for every day that I missed you. Being apart from you… made me realise that I never wanted to be apart from you again. And when I got the news about Piper… I was terrified. Terrified that, just when this chance that I’d never thought would happen in a million years was in front of me, you’d get taken from me forever. A-And-”

At this point, Asher’s voice broke, his head falling limp as he stared at his hands, which clenched and unclenched. His shoulders shuddered for a moment before he inhaled deeply.

“And I realised that… there wasn’t any point in waiting anymore. Except… I wanted to make it special. I wanted to make sure that, even if you said no, you’d at least have a good time. I’d basically already decided on the plane back that I’d ask you out. Kinda assumed, too, that you’d say yes. Until yesterday… when you didn’t say anything, that scared the hell out of me.”

He looked up at her, a smile on his face below his shimmering eyes. “Then… when you kissed me… I couldn’t even think anymore. I’d almost forgotten the question I even asked. It felt… too unreal. Too good to be true.”

Lila grasped his hands in hers, her own eyes sparkling. “It was perfect. Seriously. I’m… so glad that you asked. I… was wishing and hoping this whole time that you’d ask me.”

He grinned at her before his eyes widened in realisation.

“Let’s make it Facebook official,” he said, grabbing his phone from the coffee table.

“R-Really?” Lila was taken aback as she watched him rapidly tap on his phone’s screen.

“Yeah,” Asher replied matter-of-factly. “I wasn’t lying when I said I wanted everyone to know.”

“But… Facebook’s a bit outdated, isn’t it?” Lila responded, grabbing her phone too.

“I mean, I have most of the grade on here, plus people from other grades,” Asher shrugged. “Plus, who says we have to stop there?”

“Should… we tell our friends first?” Lila asked, resting a hand on his. He met her gaze before sheepishly smiling at her.

“I kinda told Isaac on Wednesday that I’d be asking you.”

“Is that why he was being so weird?” Lila queried.

“… Yeah… He’s been really excited. I could tell that he was so close to mentioning something all the time. Never regretted telling him something more in my life.”

Lila chuckled, before opening her phone for the first time since yesterday afternoon. There was a text from Clare that she sent last night and a few messages from Twisted Bitches’r’Us.

“Can I tell Clare, Elise, and Grace first? I… feel like they might be miffed if they see it pop up on Facebook and stuff without me telling them first.”

“Go ahead,” Asher nodded, placing his phone down. “Not like we’re not just waiting around anyway.”

Lila opened up Clare’s message first –

Seeing Alex tomorrow morning for brunch, was all Clare had said.

Good, Lila replied, sending a smiley face emoji, Asher asked me to be his girlfriend yesterday and I said yes

FINALLY, Clare responded instantly, several emojis of varying stages of emotion following immediately afterwards. Tell him he’s a dickhead for waiting for so long

Nah, I’m good, Lila responded, a goofy smile on her face.

Clare sent through a flurry of questions, but Lila simply replied that she’d tell her about it when she saw her next.

Then, she moved on to her group chat. It seemed that Grace and Elise were just chatting idly about some TikTok last night. Lila repeated her news, waiting for only a second before receiving a voice note from Elise. Pressing ‘play’ allowed a five-second clip of Elise whisper-yelling in clear excitement to sound from her phone. It ended with a voice that sounded awfully like Andy the Manager over the beeping of a fryer, asking Elise why she was yelling.

Grace, instead, congratulated Lila through a message, an emoji of two small love hearts following it. Then, after a second, an eloquent demand to be told everything on Monday. Lila grinned as she replied with a ‘yes ma’am’ before looking up at Asher.

He looked back at her with a warm smile. “Seems like they took it well.”

“Extremely. I can’t wait anymore, let’s update everything.”

He laughed, looking back at his phone. Lila couldn’t contain her smile as Asher zipped through various apps, either adding her as his girlfriend as of yesterday publicly or adding her to his bio. She did the same.

Notifications started flooding in, but Lila, once she was satisfied she was done, switched her phone to silent and placed it on the coffee table. Asher continued to look at his phone for a moment before following suit.

Suddenly, though, he looked nervous.

“I… know you said yes and everything, and we’ve just put it everywhere, but… I mean… I just wanted to make sure, you know. Now that you’ve slept on it. That you’re sure. Like, you can take it back if you want. Is there a cooling off period with these things?” he asked, looking away from her and towards the TV, fidgeting with his hands.

Lila blinked at him before breaking into a wide grin. “You don’t need to worry. I’m sure, and I’ve been sure for ages now. I’m not just gonna disappear or take it back or something. We’re really together. You’re my boyfriend, whether you like it or not, Asher.”

His nervousness turned into relief as he wiped his face. “And you’re my girlfriend, whether you like it or not, Lila.”

They smiled at each other, with Lila’s eyes being drawn to his lips again. Was it okay to kiss him now?

Just as Lila pondered this, the intercom sounded again, with Marlene stating that breakfast was ready.

“Let’s go,” Asher smiled, standing up and extending his hand for her to take. She did so, and they descended the stairs before arriving in the dining room, hand-in-hand.

Gabriel was fussing about the table with a vase of flowers from the picnic, plates of French toast topped with syrup, ice cream, and chocolate sauce with cut fruit already set in their places before Asher and Lila’s usual spots.

“Good morning, good morning,” he chirped upon seeing them enter. His eyes sparkled as he evidently registered the fact that they were holding hands. “Sleep well?” Gabriel added with a smile, stepping back and observing how the flowers were sitting.

Lila and Asher shared a look before Asher grinned. “Very,” he said, gesturing for Lila to take a seat. She did so, and he tucked her chair in slightly.

“Oh my heart,” Gabriel cried, placing a hand dramatically on his chest. “You two are going to make me sick. With joy, of course.”

He exited, Marlene taking his place, holding a pitcher of pinkish juice. “Pomegranate juice,” Marlene explained cordially as she poured some for both Lila and Asher.

“Eat, eat!” Gabriel shouted from the kitchen. “We won’t be joining you.”

Lila and Asher heeded his command, eating without much discussion. Lila wasn’t exactly sure why they were so silent, but perhaps it was because out of the corner of her eye, she saw Marlene and Gabriel float past the open doorway, clearly peering in to check on them every so often. At times when Asher also noticed them, he would frown and mimic ‘shooing’ them away, which they did with speed.

With Lila’s final swig of her juice, she was finished. Asher downed his own cup before putting it down on the coaster with an excited grin.

“Alright, Lila, since you humoured me in what I wanted to do last night-” Lila could have sworn she heard a gasp from the shadows of the open doorway into the kitchen, but he ignored it and swiftly continued, “-I want to humour you. Ready for a walk?”

Lila locked eyes with Asher and he gave her a subtle, knowing nod. There was no doubt about his intention – they were going on a walk to check out the farmhouse and hopefully find answers as to why Piper had a photo of it on her stalkery corkboard.

Lila stood up immediately. “Yes. A walk sounds perfect.”

She started to head towards the back doors when Asher chuckled, grabbing her arm. “Hold on, we should probably get changed. Wandering around outside in our pyjamas in this temperature sounds awful, even for me.”

Lila’s cheeks felt hot as she let Asher guide her back upstairs, unwilling to say a word. They broke off to their separate rooms, with Lila pulling her jeans back on and a fresh, cream-coloured knit sweater. She untucked the necklace Asher had given her from underneath her jumper, brushing against it lightly with her fingers. Now that they were dating, it didn’t make sense to hide it away outside of school.

Opening the door, she found him pacing, now dressed in casual long pants and a light grey hoodie. He ceased his pacing immediately once she emerged.

“You look nice,” he said, a tentative smile tugging at his lips. “I like your necklace.”

“Thanks,” she smiled brightly at him, slipping her hand into his. “My boyfriend got it for me.”

He made a strange sound, halfway between a squeak and a laugh, before clearing his throat, his face reddening. “You should introduce me to him. Sounds like a great guy.”

Lila leaned her head against his shoulder, her smile still on her face. “Yes, he is. You might like him.”

He squeezed her hand, clearly biting back his own grin. They stood there for a moment, with Lila cherishing the fact that she could be so close to him.

“Alright,” he said softly, squeezing her hand once more. “Let’s go see this creepy ass farmhouse again.”

She’d almost forgotten that was their current mission. They travelled down the stairs and towards the back doors, where they’d left their shoes.

“Going for a walk,” Asher called behind him as he slid open the doors. They heard vague sounds of acknowledgement from Marlene and Gabriel before he shut the doors behind them.

The air this morning was rather brisk, though the freshness helped keep it pleasant. It was still morning, with not even the final dregs of a cloud in the sky. The dew from the grass clung to the bottom of her jeans as they strolled through the backyard, but she hardly noticed as her attention was far more focused on the fact that Asher was still holding her hand as if it were the most nonchalant and normal thing in the world.

Lila surveyed the backyard with interest. There was no trace of the picnic remaining, except for small compressions in the grass where the picnic blanket had been weighed down. Marlene was certainly an efficient cleaner.

Lila didn’t feel the need to fill the silence they shared on their journey towards the disused road at the back of Asher’s property. It seemed that Asher was on a similar wavelength. It was almost as though the absence of conversation allowed Lila to fully savour this new day – the first morning as Asher’s girlfriend.

They reached the cobblestone road shortly after, the clacking of their footsteps against the stones being the only sound to grace the air. Lila’s previous impression of this road was absolutely correct – it was definitely a romantic pathway, with its secluded nature, and a perfect one to walk down whilst holding Asher’s hand.

Lila gazed up at the trees, still as knotted and gnarled as the last time she’d been here. Asher seemed to follow her gaze before finally speaking.

“So… school’s tomorrow,” he said, his tone sounding as though there was much more to this observation.

“Yeah,” Lila replied, looking up at him.

“I guess… well… I know we normally have lunch with Isaac, Elise, and Grace… but… I kinda want to spend some time with just you. Y’know. Enjoy the time we have together.”

“I see. It’d be a lie if I said I didn’t feel the same.”

“… I still need to spend my morning teas recruiting those last few teachers. And… well, while I take Isaac, I mainly try to advocate on my own. He usually stands around kicking rocks or whatever while I’m talking to a teacher. I think it looks better, given my standing and all that, that it’s just me. I probably only need one more week and I’ll be all done.”

“So, morning tea with Elise and Grace this week then lunch… just us?”

“O-Only if you want. I don’t want to make decisions for you.”

“It’s not like we haven’t had lunch with just us,” Lila stated matter-of-factly. “I’m more concerned about how Elise and Grace might feel if I’m ditching them.”

“It’s kinda a good opportunity for Elise and Isaac to get closer if we’re not there,” Asher noted. “I know Grace would still be there… but I’m sure if we rope her in, she might make herself scarce on some occasions.”

“Good idea,” Lila smiled. “Two birds, one stone.”

“Exactly. And, if it goes well, I don’t reckon Elise would even think you’re ditching her. Grace, on the other hand, may have different feelings.”

“If we get her in on the plan, I’m sure she’d be pleased about it. Elise… well, she’s never really mentioned liking anyone before. Grace is just as eager as we are about matchmaking – so she’d be stoked, I reckon.”

“Great,” Asher grinned. “Then I can pay Isaac back.”

Lila playfully rolled her eyes. “You both are constantly repaying each other; I don’t think either of you even know who owes what.”

“True,” Asher laughed, tossing his hair out of his eyes. “But I’ve been ditching him so often this year… I’d feel bad leaving him all on his own without a girlfriend at lunch, too. Especially since he clearly likes Elise.”

“Now I feel bad about leaving Grace without her girlfriend at lunch, too.”

“Girlfriend?”

Lila’s heart stopped, the warmth she’d been feeling from her walk with Asher suddenly draining, like the plug of a bath had been removed. “I-I meant boyfriend. Your mention of girlfriend… mixed me up.”

Asher eyed her carefully before shrugging. “It happens.”

Lila wasn’t quite convinced that she’d saved it, but he didn’t mention it as they continued their leisurely walk.

“S-So,” Lila piped up, hurriedly trying to steer the conversation in a different direction. “Why do you reckon Piper was at the farmhouse?”

He pursed his lips, a slight frown creasing his brow. “I’ve honestly been trying to figure that out ever since you told me you saw a photo of it at the police station. But nothing’s coming to mind at all.”

“I… see.”

“Do you have any ideas?”

Lila shook her head. “None. But… you know that creepy figure we saw? I… what if they killed her?”

Asher glanced at her pale face and soothingly rubbed the back of her hand. “Well, she managed to take a picture of it and stick it to her corkboard, so she wasn’t dead then. She was found at the park, not at the farmhouse, too, so… it’s probably safe. Probably.”

Lila grew quiet, unease settling in her stomach. His choice of the word ‘probably’ didn’t imbue her with any kind of confidence. Not that it wasn’t an apt word in the circumstances…

She could feel her eyes on him and he sighed deeply.

“When I woke up the first time,” he said in a hushed tone, “I immediately wanted to tell Mum. She… she’s known about you for a while.” He scratched at his chin, seeming suddenly bashful. “Since… since I first laid eyes on you, actually. I…”

He shook his head, almost violently. Lila stopped in her tracks, her hand still in his, which prevented him from walking any further.

“Where’s all this coming from?” Lila asked, though not unkindly. It was quite an unexpected change from their previous topic. Plus, Asher generally avoided talking about his Mum – except in vulnerable moments, or specifically during their investigation into her disappearance.

“Never mind,” Asher insisted, shaking his head again. “Let’s keep going.”

“You don’t have to be scared if you want to tell me something. I’m here to listen.”

“It’s not that… I know you’re here to listen. But… I’m kinda worried you’ll laugh at me.”

Laugh at him? Now she was more curious.

“Won’t know until you try,” she replied, trying to sound encouraging. He lifted his eyes to meet hers before sighing in defeat.

“When you look at me like that… with your eyes all sparkling with curiosity… I can’t ever say no. Your joy in uncovering things… and the way you think… I just want to see it more and more. It… utterly fascinates me. Though I’m smart, sure, I don’t think I’ve ever been curious about learning. I learn because I’m good at it, and I like being right. It’s very seldom that I’m legitimately interested… but you seem to have this thirst, once something piques your interest.”

He paused before throwing his free hand up into the air. “You win. That wasn’t what I was going to say, by the way. But… I just had to tell you that.”

Lila couldn’t take her eyes off him, the words he said slowly sinking in, a small smile creeping over her face. He looked thoughtful for a moment before taking a deep breath. “I… I was going to say… that when we first met… and I vividly remember this… but I came home, really excited. We were in Grade 2, and I remember almost being strangled by those hats with the stopper things, but I didn’t care. I jumped in the car and I told Mum… that I met my future girlfriend.”

Lila’s heart melted in her chest, the overwhelming sweetness of this memory he was sharing with her completely taking over. “That’s adorable, Asher.”

He chuckled, though it seemed to be more of a nervous reaction than in humour. “Yeah… well, she laughed as she clipped me into the seat and told me she’d be thrilled to meet you, once you were my girlfriend. Kinda not really serious about it, which is fair, I guess. Kids say that stuff all the time and then forget who they were talking about as soon as the topic changes. But… with you… I just… I told Mum about you then, and throughout the years since, and, I mean, at first, it was just some kinda kid-like admiration. Almost like a running joke with my Mum, until I realised in Grade 7 or 8 that it really wasn’t a joke. And, now that it’s finally happened… it’s killing me that I can’t tell her. That I can’t introduce you to her as my girlfriend. I… want to find her, and I hope she’s safe, for so many godamn reasons… but now another one’s been added to my list.”

He paused before adding, “I knew she didn’t like Holly. She’s… brutally honest when she doesn’t like something. Almost to a fault. But she said to me that she’d accept it if Holly made me happy. Then… she disappeared. I was… this sounds so shitty and selfish, but I was kinda glad that she wasn’t around to see me crying over Holly. Not that I think she’d say, ‘told you so’, but I’d definitely feel it. But, with you, I… I think she’d really like you. So…”

He clenched his free hand tightly as he continued, “So, when we find her, ‘cause we will, promise me you’ll meet her and even hang out with her? She’s really important to me, and I just want two of the most important people in my life to meet, especially ‘cause I think you’d like her too.”

Lila blinked. That was a whole lot of information at once. Luckily, it didn’t take her long to absorb what seemed to be plaguing him the most out of all of that.

“Of course. I’d love to meet your Mum. She sounds amazing. Besides, you’ve met my whole family. Why would I ever say no?”

Asher immediately beamed at her, as though her agreement gave him life again. “I don’t know, but I had this fear that you would. Don’t mind me… I’m a bit stupid sometimes.”

“Aren’t we all?” Lila laughed, now hugging his arm rather than simply holding his hand. His breathing seemed to catch in his throat, but he didn’t object.

“Where’d that even come from, anyway?” Lila asked idly, glancing up at him again. He met her gaze before shrugging.

“Honestly? I thought what I’d said about Piper’s death was freaky and took a hard left to change the topic.”

Lila burst into surprised laughter and Asher swiftly joined in, gently brushing his hand against the one that was still curled around his arm as if to ensure it really was there.

They weren’t far from the farmhouse now, with Lila’s mind still running through what he’d said. So… he’d noticed her all the way in Grade 2 – and even told his Mum about it, almost preordaining that he would want her to be his girlfriend. She hadn’t been sure if he could get even more endearing to her heart until knowing that tidbit of information. There was absolutely no way that she’d regret being his – especially after he showed his vulnerabilities to her like that. Like he had been, since the start of this year. And… he even said that she was one of the most important people to him…

She had never felt the need to pretend to be someone or something else in his presence – and, it seemed, neither did he. Being so authentically liked like this – falling for him never felt so easy, either, as though she was skydiving right by his side, the rush leaving her breathless.

“Sorry, by the way,” Asher murmured, his cheeks flushed with apparent embarrassment. “I… keep bringing up Holly.”

“It’s alright,” Lila replied earnestly. “… Since… you’ve been vulnerable with me, can I be vulnerable with you?”

He halted, looking at her with wide, round eyes. “Of course.”

She looked at the ground, her courage suddenly disappearing. She swallowed hard in an effort to bring it back, but it remained elusive. She’d just have to go for it, even if she messed up.

“I… well, there’s two things. I’d felt pretty insecure, like I’d never match up to Holly, since she was such a bombshell. She was so gorgeous, and fit, and seemed to, on paper, match you well. And she seemed so nice at the time. Like there was no way I could hate her. So… even though I know what she did to you, hearing you say those kinds of things… kinda like… I dunno, like where Holly had failed to measure up… it makes me happy in some kinda twisted way.”

Lila took a peek at Asher, who seemed stunned by this revelation. Lila didn’t say anything more for a few seconds, returning her gaze back down to the floor.

“… I- wow. I… I guess it’s similar to how I felt, when you told me that you weren’t going to go on a second date with Theo. Hearing that he wasn’t for you… it really made me happy, even though I thought we wouldn’t ever get together at the time,” he eventually said, his tone sounding floored.

Lila nodded. The silence hung in the air between them before Asher spoke again.

“And the second thing is?”

Lila winced. She’d said two things, sure, but now she wasn’t quite so willing to tell him the second thing. But… if she was going to be vulnerable, like he had been, then she had to keep going.

“When… when you told me that you broke up with Holly, you just said she was pregnant. So, I’d originally thought the baby was yours, as I guess most would. I figured she would’ve been devastated that her boyfriend dumped her after getting her pregnant, and even though you’d cried in front of me that day… I… I couldn’t stop smiling. It made me sick, actually, that I was so happy about it all. I mean, I hadn’t yet figured out that I liked you, but it made me so happy when you broke up with her. I had to keep fighting from showing that as I tried to help you feel better. And… it made me feel disgusting. Like I was a monster, almost. I felt so guilty – especially when I saw how you were, that Saturday.”

Asher remained silent – long enough that Lila began to feel really nervous. Finally, she looked up – only to see him smiling.

“Hearing you say that,” he said as he held her gaze with his tender eyes, “makes me happy. I hadn’t realised that you’d liked me all the way back then – and… fuck, I don’t even know how to describe what I’m feeling. It… it’s really like something was trying to draw us together. I don’t know if I believe in fate but… after all that’s happened… maybe I’m starting to.”

Lila returned his smile, feeling relief wash over her. He didn’t think she was weird, or cruel. He… was happy that that had been her reaction. She couldn’t contain her own happiness that she was feeling, hearing that he felt that way about something that she’d felt so guilty about.

Asher started walking again, bringing Lila seamlessly along with him. The energy between them seemed different now – as though sharing those vulnerabilities with each other had lifted something. Bonded them closer together emotionally, at the very least. Especially since neither had reacted negatively to the other’s confessions.

Then, all too quickly, the road ended.

And Lila’s stomach plummeted to her icy-cold feet, her eyes shakily taking in what she was seeing. She couldn’t figure out how to work her lungs properly and she gripped even more tightly onto Asher in fear and confusion.

The farmhouse that she’d been so anxious to see – the one that might’ve held clues about what happened to Piper – was no more.

Instead, what lay in its place was its charred, blackened remains – burnt all the way down to its foundations with very few structural supports, bits of wood, scorched furniture, and glassless window frames remaining. From what she could see, the rusted tin roof had collapsed in some parts, and the cladding that had once adorned the exterior walls had given away, looking much more reminiscent of blackened charcoal.

“What… the fuck?” she heard Asher murmur incredulously, slipping gently out of her grasp as he stepped forward.