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Scattering Lilac Ashes
Chapter One Hundred and Eight

Chapter One Hundred and Eight

Chapter One Hundred and Eight

“Students, please,” Ms Wang called over the bustle of 11E, “settle down. Please take a ribbon and sit down.”

As Lila’s classmates filed past Ms Wang in the gymnasium towards their marked '11E' seats, which were set up for their usual fortnightly assembly, she handed each student a small, black ribbon with a safety pin holding it together. From what Lila assumed, it was to serve as a ribbon of remembrance for Piper.

Ms Wang seemed to hesitate before handing Lila a ribbon with a gentle smile.

“We just need to wear these for the assembly,” Ms Wang confirmed in a low voice.

“Thanks, Ms Wang,” Lila replied, shuffling along the row of chairs and securing the ribbon to the right side of her blazer. Elise and Grace followed behind her and they eventually sat down.

Usually, Lila zoned out during assembly, clapping automatically at appropriate points. Today, black banners tumbled from the ceiling next to the onstage screen, demonstrating the heaviness of today’s main event. The screen showed a large school photo of Piper, smiling brightly and seemingly taken at the beginning of this year – none the wiser to her demise in just a few short months. Lila involuntarily gulped – she’d forgotten that Piper’s death was to be announced formally. It looked like zoning out wouldn’t be an option.

The usual procession began, with Jason and Harper taking their places next to Mr Lockwood, alongside the Vice Captains of the Senior School, Middle School and Primary School. The heads of year for the Middle and Senior Schools, which comprised Years 7 to 12, also sat onstage, alongside the Deputy Headmaster and the Chaplain.

Once the formalities were over, Mr Lockwood stood at the lectern, looking incredibly grim.

“Good morning, students,” Mr Lockwood began, clearing his throat. “Today’s assembly is a rather serious one.”

He paused, peering over his glasses at the crowd of rapt students. “Today, we are gathered to remember Ms Piper Baker. She was a student at Forestglade College from Grade 1 until the beginning of last term.” He paused again, his face twisting with a complicated emotion. Was he still thinking about her final moments at the College, where he expelled her? Did he feel guilty?

“Unfortunately, over the school holidays, she passed away. Whilst she was no longer a student at the time of her death, her time at Forestglade College led to her making many memories and friends, and her loss is felt by a vast number of people. We ask that you please respect her family at this time. There are extra support resources available at the Counselling Services building, and the details of her memorial are on the screen behind me.”

He turned, facing the screen which had changed to display the details for a memorial over at a local crematorium. He then requested a minute of silence, before displaying a collage of images of Piper during her time at Forestglade College. Lila could hear a few students around her begin to sniffle, but there was no outright sobbing. She didn’t dare look to find the sources of the crying students and instead looked ahead at Mr Lockwood, who stood awkwardly on stage as gentle music played beneath a new photo collage of Piper. Her own eyes were beginning to prickle as the sniffles grew in volume and number. Lila wondered what Asher was making of all of this. Would he be affected by it?

Whilst she again felt more relief than sadness at Piper’s death, the fact that Piper had far more friends than Lila had realised – friends that now had a void that Piper’s absence now left – was tugging at Lila’s heartstrings. She couldn’t imagine how she’d be able to function if… well, if Asher passed away. Elise, Grace or even Isaac, too. Would she even want to go to school again? Was… that why Ayla wasn’t around?

Mr Lockwood introduced a choir performance, which sang ‘Wind Beneath Your Wings’ (a song that, due to its haunting emotion, caused a tear or two to roll down Lila’s face), before moving on to other items on today’s agenda. The feeling of heaviness, however, never faded from the atmosphere. This probably wasn’t helped by the fact that the school’s administration apparently decided not to present any awards today.

Wrapping up today’s assembly was a speech from a male Grade 12 student that Lila didn’t recognise. Lila couldn’t quite focus on the words that he was saying as she fidgeted in her chair, but he spoke about surviving loss, as his mother passed away several years ago, and ways to excel that weren’t necessarily typical. That, some days, getting up and eating could be a marker of success.

There was not a dry eye in the room, even from Lila, by the time he finished with a sorrowful smile. The choirmaster led the school into a rendition of the school song before it was announced that the Grade 10s would be packing away the chairs today.

As the assembly hadn’t run overtime, their schedule went on as usual – meaning that, once dismissed, students and teachers would scatter across campus to their respective classrooms. For Lila, this meant heading off to English.

She hung around the back exit of the gymnasium, hoping to spot Asher in the crowd so they could walk over together. It didn’t take long to see him, given he was relatively tall. He seemed rather morose, not really responding to Isaac’s chatter.

But, once his eyes met Lila’s, his expression changed to one of excitement, his eyes twinkling. Isaac seemed to notice this as he stopped talking, instead choosing to smirk at Lila.

“Hey,” Asher grinned once they were in Lila’s vicinity.

“Hey,” Lila replied, unable to stop herself from grinning in response.

“I’m gonna head,” Isaac said, clapping Asher on the shoulder. He waved goodbye at them both before strolling away, both hands in his pockets. If this was a cartoon, Lila was convinced that he would start whistling.

“Do you wanna go the fast way or the slow way to English?” Asher asked, looking down at Lila as they began their own journey to class.

“There’s a slow way?” Lila queried, her lips twitching into a curious smile.

“Yeah,” Asher nodded, his expression looking bashful. “We go around the STEM area, rather than past the library.”

Lila glanced around, trying to see if there were any of their English classmates around.

“I… wouldn’t mind a decent walk,” she said faintly.

“Follow my lead,” he beamed.

They meandered down the chosen path in a comfortable silence, with Lila looking towards the overcast sky. She was curious about Asher’s thoughts on Piper’s remembrance, having noticed that he still had the ribbon pinned to his blazer, but wasn’t sure whether it was an appropriate time to bring it up.

Asher seemed deep in thought for a majority of the way to English, which further added to Lila’s assumption that it wasn’t a good time. So, instead, she took in the fresh air and pleasant landscaping dotting their way. For being the ‘slow way’, it didn’t seem that much slower to Lila at all, but it was a decidedly more scenic route.

“So,” Asher finally spoke up once they’d passed the bustling STEM area. “Intense assembly, yeah?”

“Yeah,” Lila concurred in a small voice. “What’d you think about it?”

“What’d I think?” Asher seemed surprised by the question before frowning ever so slightly. “Probably appropriate in the circumstances. I mean, she wasn’t a student anymore, but given the way she died and that she’d been away from our school for, what, eight weeks or so before she died… the fanfare made sense.”

“I wondered if Mr Lockwood felt a certain type of way about it all,” Lila noted with a sigh. “Since he’d basically just expelled her.”

“I reckon he feels complicated about it. She’d been here since Grade 1, and he’s been the Headmaster that whole time. Sure, she was a psycho stalker who didn’t learn her lesson, but she was still one of his charges for a very long time. Seemed like she was relatively popular, and she participated in a few school performances, too.”

“Yeah,” Lila pursed her lips. “… Did you feel sad about it?”

“About the assembly?”

“Well, there were a few people from our cohort that were crying.”

“Yeah, I heard them, too. Personally, it’s more sad that she left people behind to mourn her. I hadn’t expected that, to be honest. Given she was so… yeah. I… kinda think she must’ve had like two personalities or something. One that was friendly enough that people wanted to stay friends with her, and one that she kept secret. For good reason, and I wish it’d been kept a secret forever – or better yet, never existed.” He paused, slipping his hands into his pockets, his eyes trained on the road. Then, he added, “I kinda wonder what her friends know about her expulsion and everything that happened.”

“Same. I doubt she would’ve told them everything. Maybe she said she decided to change schools.”

“Well, it’s not like the school’s very public about expulsions. It’s kinda shameful.”

“What, taking out students that don’t fit the morals and standards expected of the College? Students that break the rules?”

Asher met her gaze before winking at her. “Sounds like we should be expelled, too.”

Lila flushed, both in embarrassment at the truth in his statement, and at the fact that he’d winked at her so easily. “W-Well, I just mean-”

“It’s shameful that the College had those students in the first place,” Asher explained. “Not necessarily that they’ve had to take action – more so that they let them in to begin with.”

“I see…”

Within the blink of an eye, they’d arrived at their English classroom. A few students were standing around outside, talking in hushed voices about the assembly and theorising wildly about Piper’s death. No one seemed to take notice of Lila or Asher, which Lila was grateful for. Until something caught her attention –

“They totally did it,” whispered a voice that she recognised as belonging to Callum Bennett, one of Lila’s English classmates that she didn’t interact much with.

“What, what?” a voice that Lila recognised as belonging to Liam, who was good friends with Callum, whispered back.

“They totally murdered her. Asher and Lila,” Callum’s whisper sounded satisfied at his conclusion.

“You’re joking. Why?” Liam asked, his voice sounding louder with each syllable.

“Shut up, dude. Why? ‘Cause they got her expelled. Obviously wasn’t enough.”

Lila heard Asher huff and she glanced at him. He was gritting his teeth, his eyes flashing with rage. Would he tell them off?

Lila clutched at his blazer, catching his attention. She subtly shook her head and his jaw tightened further before relaxing entirely.

“They’re just idiots spitballing,” Lila murmured. “We’ve been cleared by the police.”

“I feel like telling people that will make it look worse for us,” Asher muttered, crossing his arms against his chest in agitation.

“Probably,” Lila replied frankly. “But all that matters is that we know we’re innocent.”

Asher sighed before nodding. “Yeah.”

Ms Shard arrived not a moment later, her hair looking rather harried.

“Sorry, everyone,” she called out as she pushed open the door to the classroom. “Had to assist the Grade 10s with the chairs. I hope you’re all far more reasonable when it’s your turn.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Lila heard a few classmates say drily in unison as they filed into the classroom behind Ms Shard.

Ms Shard remained frazzled for the rest of the lesson, which meant that her tolerance for any kind of chatter was at an all-time low. Lila sullenly took yet more notes, though this time it wasn’t as much of a flurry of information as the last lesson. Unfortunately, though, it meant her wrists weren’t sore… and that meant that she wouldn’t have an excuse to feel Asher’s touch again.

Once class was over, Lila and Asher quietly ambled their way to the locker room. Asher seemed to be thinking about something, his lips carefully pursed. Actually, now that Lila was looking intently at him, he seemed anxious, or worried perhaps. Had the comments from their classmates affected him more than he was letting on?

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“Everything okay?” Lila asked as they rounded the corner to the locker room. He glanced at her before quickly averting his eyes again.

“Yeah,” he replied quickly, opening the door for her. She passed him and he swiftly closed the door behind them.

“I’m just gonna grab our food,” he said awkwardly, sidling away to his locker.

“Alright,” Lila replied, a slight frown on her face. He disappeared around the corner, almost at a jog.

She placed her things in her locker before gathering Elise and Grace.

“Asher’s acting… odd,” Lila sighed as Elise locked her locker. Elise and Grace shared a look before they both turned to Lila.

“How so?” Grace asked, inspecting her lunch offerings before closing her locker too.

“It… it’s just a feeling I’m getting,” Lila murmured. “He’s… making me worried.”

“It is the first week of Term 3,” Grace reasoned. “Maintaining being the Dux is hard work all year ‘round. He’s probably just stressing about his new assignments.”

“I guess… but something’s telling me that it’s not about that,” Lila trailed off, seeing Asher and Isaac turn the corner and wave at them. As a group, they all took their usual path towards the library, though it seemed that no one was in much of a speaking mood.

Sitting down in the meeting room apparently lifted the lid on everyone’s conversations, however. Elise and Grace immediately began to comment on the assembly, with Isaac listening attentively.

“That was really intense,” Elise sighed, peeling her mandarin.

“Sure was,” Grace nodded, “I almost cried myself.”

Elise wrinkled her nose. “Crying over Piper? After what happened to Lila and Asher?”

“It was more because everyone else was sad,” Grace replied matter-of-factly. “Besides, there’s no getting around the fact that her murder was insane.”

Lila glanced uneasily at Asher, who was unearthing his lunch at half the speed and enthusiasm he normally did. Lila decided not to respond to Grace’s comment and opened her own lunchbox, looking down at her chickpea curry and rice meal.

“Did you want it warmed?” Asher asked in a low murmur. Lila met his gaze and shook her head.

“It doesn’t need to be. If you’re going to warm yours up, you may as well, but I don’t specifically need it warmed.”

“Alright,” he said, staring down at his curry. Then he stood up, grabbing both of their containers.

“I’ll be back,” he announced, crossing the room so rapidly that Lila couldn’t even stand up in time to follow him.

“Asher-”

The door swung shut behind him with a note of finality.

“You’re right,” Elise said through a mouthful of mandarin, “he is being weird.”

“Let the man warm his food,” Isaac suddenly piped up, his eyes sparkling knowingly. “He’s got a lot on his mind.”

“Wish he’d tell me,” Lila grumbled, inspecting her lunchbox again. Today, it looked like dessert was some decadent red velvet cookies with cream cheese frosting.

“He probably will,” Isaac said loftily.

“Isaac, you know something don’t you?” Elise accused.

“Me?” Isaac blinked before looking down at his banana. “I just know when my buddy’s working through some stuff.”

“But what stuff?” Elise pressed, leaning in close to Isaac. His eyes lifted to meet hers before he peeled his banana and shoved it into his mouth.

“You’re avoiding the topic,” Elise pouted, scooting forward even closer. Isaac’s face flushed as he chewed even more slowly, shuffling away from her.

“You’re gonna tell me,” Elise huffed, crossing her arms. “Out with it.”

“There’s nothing,” Isaac snapped, his eyes darting to Lila before resting on Elise. “Stop asking.”

“C’mon,” Elise cajoled, leaning forward even more now.

“Stop it,” Isaac insisted, waving his banana peel at her. “Or else I’ll put you into time out.”

Elise pouted again before falling back into her chair. “Whatever.”

Lila pressed her lips together, unable to keep herself from wondering what was up with Asher.

“Don’t worry too much,” Grace said gently. “I know you can’t help it, but… if it was something to worry about, he would’ve told you since you guys are close.”

“That’s why I’m worrying,” Lila muttered, biting down on one of the cookies. It was heavenly and momentarily distracting for a few seconds. She took another bite, avoiding the gaze of everyone in the room.

“Came back,” Asher called as he pushed the door open, the scent of the curries wafting through the room.

“Smells delicious,” Isaac grinned. “Where’s mine?”

“You can try some of mine,” Asher offered it for Isaac to take from him.

“Nah,” Isaac shook his head. “Just teasing.”

Asher shrugged before passing Lila her container and sitting across from her. No one spoke as Asher and Lila began to eat, which made Lila feel incredibly anxious.

“Asher-” Lila began, blowing on a spoonful of curry.

“Y-Yes?” he responded, dropping his spoon into his curry and splashing some onto his hand. “Shit,” he uttered, licking at the spot his food had fallen onto. Lila couldn’t help but stare, watching his tongue run along his hand and wondering how it would feel-

“W-What’s up?” he asked, hurriedly wiping the back of his hand with a napkin, his face red with apparent embarrassment. Lila clenched her jaw, forcing her eyes to look at her spoon again. Instead of answering, she shovelled a few bites into her mouth at once, chewing in time to her furious heartbeat.

“Lila?” he tried again after a couple moments, looking concerned now. She sighed; her heart having returned to its normal pace.

“Just… never mind,” she said reluctantly.

“I’m minding,” he replied simply.

“I just wondered how long you microwaved it for,” she lied, focusing her eyes back on the curry.

“Only a couple minutes,” Asher replied, his tone sprinkled with confusion. “Feels like that wasn’t what you wanted to talk to me about.”

Lila’s face flushed a deep crimson; her mind having fallen completely blank. Wasn’t it about his odd behaviour? But she could hardly talk, what with the… unsavoury thoughts running through her mind.

“You excited for practice tomorrow, Asher?” Isaac’s voice called out, compelling Asher to look at him.

“Yeah,” Asher replied noncommittally, taking a drink from his water bottle. Lila gave Isaac a grateful smile, and he gave her a slight nod in response before switching the topic to their strategy for their match against St Peters next week.

Lila continued to eat her lunch, though every so often she’d catch Asher’s eye. Strangely, though, he would always immediately look elsewhere. Sustaining eye contact was proving to be a mission, but one that Lila was slightly thankful for. Her mind would probably start acting up again otherwise.

Finally, her torment ended with the customary stretch and pack up five minutes before class was to start. She integrated herself between Grace and Elise on their walk back to the locker room, and they seemed to get the hint, engaging her in a conversation about the newest Snapchat filter that everyone and their mother seemed to be using. She could feel Asher’s eyes rest on her every so often, but resisted the temptation to meet them, throwing herself deeper into her conversation with Elise and Grace.

Once they arrived at the entrance to the locker room, Lila handed Asher her lunchbox before saying goodbye. She was about to dash off to her locker when he gripped the sleeve of her blazer, preventing her speedy escape.

“See you tomorrow, right?” he asked, unwavering in his eye contact. He looked incredibly serious, his face somewhat seeming more pale than usual.

“Y-Yeah,” Lila smiled tentatively, gently removing herself from his grasp. “See you then.”

“Good,” he replied, sounding relieved. He smiled at her before turning around and heading off to his locker, his gait seeming stiffer than usual. What was up with him today?

“You coming to your locker?” Grace asked from Lila’s right side, the sudden question making Lila jump.

“Yeah,” Lila uttered, following Grace. “Sorry. Was I blocking the way?”

“A bit,” Elise chuckled from Lila’s left side. “C’mon, spacey.”

The rest of Lila’s day continued relatively normally, given her classes didn’t involve Asher at all. She was able to get him out of her mind, actually, which she considered a success as she heaved herself into her seat on the bus home. Today, there was no Daniel – but, from what she could recall, he was most likely at touch footy practice.

Once inside her house, she poured herself a cup of juice, contemplating how best to ask her parents if she could stay over at Asher’s tomorrow. As she pondered this, she realised, with a sinking feeling, that… if she stayed over, with those thoughts ruling her mind, she’d probably go insane. It was a terrible idea, now that she considered it.

In saying that, though, she’d more or less said that she would… and it wasn’t that she didn’t want to. She just needed to get better at preventing her intrusive thoughts from infiltrating her consciousness. That… probably needed practice.

“Oh, hey,” Clare’s voice startled Lila, though she caught herself in time, safely stowing the juice box onto the counter before it could smash onto the tiles. She turned to face her sister, considering whether she should ask Clare what to do about all of this, before gasping.

“Clare!” Lila cried, astonished. “Clare, you got a fringe!”

Clare’s face split into a wide beam as she tugged at her new fringe. “Sure did. Couple hours ago. How do ya like it?”

“It looks great,” Lila replied earnestly, turning back to the counter to pour her sister a cup of juice. “How much did you spend?”

“Ugh,” Clare’s voice was filled with disgust as she answered Lila’s question. “$65.”

“Disgusting,” Lila said sympathetically, passing the cup over to Clare, who thanked her.

“Yeah, but it had been a hot minute since I went to the hairdresser. They freshened up my layers, at least, and I think they did a good job with these curtain bangs.”

“They sure did,” Lila grinned. “Now I wanna get them.”

Clare grinned back at Lila. “Maybe you should. You can always trust your test dummy sis.”

Lila laughed before taking a sip of juice. A new question brewed in her mind as she eyed her sister who used her selfie camera to inspect her new fringe.

“Did you end up talking to Alex?”

Clare froze, staring wide-eyed at Lila. “N-Not really,” she confessed, putting her phone down.

Lila nodded shrewdly. “Thought so. Getting a fringe to avoid talking to him sounds up your alley.”

“Hey!” Clare protested before sighing heavily. “… You’re right, though.”

“Have you seen him at work since we last talked?”

“Yeah… I… I asked if we could talk and… he kinda brushed me off. Said ‘about what?’ and I was all like ‘about us?’ and he went all quiet and said he was busy this week. Busy with what?” Clare sullenly drank some juice before staring down into her cup. “Busy banging other girls, probably.”

“Clare,” Lila sighed, putting her cup down. “You’re on a break… so is it really reasonable to be upset about that?”

“No,” Clare admitted in a small voice. “But I don’t wanna be on a break. I… wanna do this thing for real.”

“You probably spooked him,” Lila said. “Saying ‘about us’ is so vague. He probably wants to, I dunno, mentally prepare for the worst or something.”

“What if the worst for him is that I want to be serious?” Clare responded, her voice even quieter than before. “Then what?”

“Then… I guess you have to move on… enjoy being single again.”

Clare groaned in frustration before downing the rest of her juice and slamming her empty cup onto the counter. “Well, that fucking sucks.”

Lila nodded. “It does. But what else can you do?”

“Run away from it forever and not date anyone ever?”

“If that’s what you want,” Lila shrugged, raising an eyebrow at Clare. “But… I think you should try. Maybe see if he’s free this weekend sometime.”

Clare closed her eyes with a grimace before exhaling deeply. “Alright. Maybe he’ll like me more with my fringe.”

Lila snorted. “I’m pretty sure he’ll like you with and without a fringe. You look good. Don’t worry about that, at least.”

Clare pressed her lips together before hanging her head. “Alright, alright. You win. I’ll try harder. Even if it doesn’t work… then at least I tried.”

“Exactly,” Lila smiled. “That’s all you can ask for.”

Clare tapped the edge of her cup before looking intently at Lila.

“So, what’s going on with you?” she asked, tilting her head to the side. “Can’t have all our conversations be about my woes.”

“A-Ah… well…” Lila coughed awkwardly, sipping more of her juice. “Um… I have been having some troubles…”

“About what?”

“About… keeping… my thoughts in check.”

“Your thoughts in check?” Clare looked entirely bewildered as she poured herself some more juice. “What does that mean?”

Lila turned around, suddenly far too embarrassed to look at Clare as she spoke. “… I’ve been… having stupid thoughts about Asher. You know, those types. When I’m with him, and when I’m without him. I can’t even enjoy the moment ‘cause I’m too worried about… I dunno, acting on them. Since we’re not dating, and… I don’t even know if he’d be interested in all that. There’s something wrong with me for sure.”

“Damn,” Clare responded incredulously. “Nothing’s wrong with you. Seriously. I mean… we’ve all been there. My advice would’ve been just to go for it, but your whole situation is so complicated. I don’t really know what you should do. Have you tried telling him?”

Lila whirled around, her face feeling as though she’d been set on fire. “No, no, no! Never. I’m never telling him that. How embarrassing.”

Clare smiled at Lila, a playful twinkle in her eye. “Lila, I can almost guarantee that whatever you’re thinking about, he’s thinking about too. Like… teenage boys are something else.”

“I doubt it,” Lila shook her head to emphasise her point. “He’s… always so studious. He’d never compromise on that by thinking such… stupid things.”

“It’s not stupid,” Clare replied shortly. “It’s literally the most normal thing at your age. Heck, even mine, too. What do you think I’ve been thinking about while I’ve been moping around at home?”

Lila fell silent, unsure what to say. Though… Clare’s reassurance did help her feel a little better. Perhaps she wasn’t as out of line as she thought she was.

“Look, you’ll get better at restraining your thoughts,” Clare said gently. “You’re just… well, I hope it’s relatively recent. It’s just taking you by surprise, that’s all. It doesn’t help that you feel like you can’t act on these thoughts, though I’m sure if you talked to him, he wouldn’t mind helping you out.”

Lila bit her bottom lip, her face still feeling hot. “You really think nothing’s wrong with me?”

“Of course,” Clare replied seriously. “Don’t stress about it.”

Lila hesitated before smiling at Clare. “Thanks, Clare. You’ve helped me feel a bit better about it all. I… don’t know how I’ll cope, but… at least knowing I’m not this weird anomaly helps.”

“No worries. When do you see him next anyway?”

“… Tomorrow… and I’m gonna ask Mum if I can stay over tomorrow night.”

“Oh God,” Clare looked horrified. “You sure you’ll survive if it’s that bad?”

“Honestly, I don’t know. But… I don’t want to not stay over, just because my brain is… how it is. Besides… I really like him. I don’t want to… I dunno. I…”

Lila’s words failed her as she tried to think hard about what she was feeling.

“I get it,” Clare said gently. “Since you’ve already stayed over once, I don’t think Mum’ll say no. She’s already opened the door to it. Plus, our parents do actually like him.”

“They do?”

“Yeah. I’m sure if he didn’t have parents, they’d want to adopt him,” Clare joked. “I think they’ll just settle on him being a son-in-law.”

Lila laughed nervously in response. Son-in-law?

“I’m only joking,” Clare clarified. “Don’t look at me like that. They do like him, though. You’ll be fine.”

They briefly chatted some more about other things that were going on – including Lila’s hopes for getting Elise and Isaac together – before Lila finally headed upstairs. Her parents arrived home soon after, and Lila tentatively asked to speak with her Mum in the kitchen, since Daniel, Clare and her Dad were all hanging out in the living room with Lila’s Mum. She didn’t want everyone to hear her plans for tomorrow, just in case her Mum declined.

Lila’s Mum took the opportunity to cut up some apples to share with the family, looking encouragingly at Lila.

“Yes, Lila?” she asked, offering Lila a slice.

“Can I stay over at Asher’s tomorrow?” Lila asked, accepting the slice but looking instead at her feet than her Mum.

Lila’s Mum paused her cutting before sighing. “Lila…”

“I know you still don’t like him-”

“That’s not it,” Lila’s Mum said firmly. “You can stay over. I already said yes to you before. But… please stay at his home.”

Lila blinked at her Mum in confusion. “What?”

“Lila, a murderer is out there,” her Mum replied, her face turning paler by the second. “I want to say no because I know you’re safe here with me at home. But… I trust that you’ll be just as safe with Asher. You just have to promise me that you’ll stay at his place as much as you can.”

“… Alright,” Lila promised. “I wasn’t planning to go anywhere. But… when will it be safe enough for me to go out?”

Lila’s Mum pressed her lips together before shaking her head. “Probably never.”

Lila tried not to look disappointed as she picked up another apple slice.

“So… let me think about it, okay?” Lila’s Mum said, patting Lila’s head gently. “Just not now.”

“Okay, Mum. Thanks. I… I know you’re just looking out for me.”

“As long as you know that. Now, take these to your father and siblings,” her Mum smiled, thrusting several bowls of fruit at Lila. Lila returned her smile before heading into the living room and serving out the bowls as requested.

They spent the rest of the night almost entirely in the living room, eating pizza rather than cooking. It was a nice change, actually, and Lila went to bed feeling the warmth of her family bonds soothe her to sleep, her worries about staying with Asher tomorrow having all but faded away.