The two sat in the inn, outside it was dark, the stars were out as well as the crescent moon.
“Mm, mm, good to see this place hasn’t changed,” John remarked as the owner of the inn, a frogman wearing a long, blue apron that was way too long for him, emerged from the kitchen.
He shot the Thief a discrete thumbs-up.
“Alright! So this is the person…” the owner thought.
“Welcome! It’s been a while since I’ve seen you!” the owner exclaimed, the last one quit after Ed, the old leader of Levelgreen was murdered.
“Hey, it’s been a while!” the Thief replied.
Two days prior, the Thief came to the inn for drinks, when asked why she only comes here alone, she replied that the person she would usually come with is busy.
After a couple of drinks and some chatting, the two agreed on a bet, the loser owed the other person one-hundred gold.
JohnWillStab looked around the inn, the one thing different about it since last time was that the silver-light guys weren’t here for the first time, in fact, nobody aside from the staff was there.
Upon closer inspection, John also noticed some small details, the fancy vase here, the expensive-looking curtains there.
JohnWillStab wasn’t paying attention to the other two as they conversed.
“And what will you be having?” asked the frogman.
JohnWillStab snapped out of his daydreaming and turned to the two.
“Eh?”
“I asked what you’ll be eating,” the frogman repeated.
“Eating? I thought we came here for drinks…”
“I’m not really hungry,” John shrugged.
The Thief shot the owner a smug look as she kept the forced smile.
“Oh, come on, it’s a nice… starry… scenic night… between two similarly aged friends…”
JohnWillStab continued staring at him blankly.
“How about a meal on the house?” he offered.
“Can I get some… toast?” John asked uncertainly.
“…”
“…”
“Is that a no?”
“N-no… we’ll… get you some toast…” the frogman retreated into the kitchen.
“Mark my words, JohnWillStab, I will have you appreciate the romantic atmosphere even if it costs me double the money I’ll get from winning the bet!”
The frogman uncertainly wrote down the order as he walked into the kitchen.
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John turned to the Thief.
“What’s up with him?” John asked jokingly.
“Well… uh… It’s just… I ordered like… a proper meal…” the Thief replied.
“A big meal and drinks? I thought you’re supposed to like… snack on the food while you drink…” he scratched his head.
The Thief let out a sigh.
“Guess you’re right…”
“I… ehh… don’t remember him being this clueless…” She thought as a waiter came to the table and placed a candle rack in the middle.
“Woah…” John remarked seeing the fancy candles.
“Fancy, right?” the Thief asked, she had specifically requested the candles from the barkeep.
“What do you think, John – fancy candles, a night-time dinner?” she prodded.
“Isn’t this like a fire hazard?” John asked looking around the wooden inn.
“…what?” the Thief didn’t expect this level of ignorance, even from John.
“I mean, the whole building is made from wood…” he crossed his arms and inspected the entire room.
He pointed to a wooden beam holding the ceiling up in the centre of the room.
“If the fire was to spread to there it’d collapse the entire building,” he added.
The waiter returned to the kitchen with a confused look.
“Uhm… he… called the candles a fire hazard…” the waiter explained.
The frogman clenched his fists.
“By god, I will find a way to make that man acknowledge my efforts to make the scene romantic!” the owner exclaimed.
“Right…” the waiter nodded.
With a fully serious expression, the owner turned to the waiter.
“Deploy the flowers!” he cried.
“F-flowers?! We don’t have any f-” he was cut off by the boss “I TOLD YOU TO GET THEM!”
“I-I spend the entire day looking for ‘fancy Italian spices’ ” the waiter explained.
“And you didn’t even succeed in that…” the boss shook his head in disappointment.
“B-but… Italy isn’t even a thing here…” the waiter said trying to reason with his boss.
“Stop making excuses!”
“R-right!” the waiter exclaimed.
“NOW GO FIND SOME FLOWERS AND DELIVER THEM TO THEIR TABLE!” the owner commanded.
JohnWillStab watched the waiter that brought him the fire hazard sprint out of the inn.
He breathed a sigh as he pointed to the man.
“See, even the staff is afraid to stay here!” John sighed.
He extinguished the candles by pinching the wicks with his fingers.
“Tch… who even asked them for this?” John asked.
“…”
“I know right…” the Thief forced a smile as she awaited the meal.
A few minutes later the waiter sprinted back into the inn with a bulging pocket of flowers, he placed them nicely on the table before running off into the kitchen.
“…”
“…”
JohnWillStab looked at the crushed flowers, they were just weeds and a few tufts of grass.
JohnWillStab looked at the Thief uncertainly, she looked back equally confused.
“…Are these… eatable?” John asked.
“Oh, that makes sense! Like a less organised salad!” the Thief replied,
Meanwhile, in the kitchen…
The waiter and the boss carefully peeked from around the door as their eyes fell upon the two.
“THEY’RE EATING THE FLOWERS!” cried the owner as JohnWillStab grabbed a handful of white flowers and began chewing on them.
“These are pretty good!” he remarked.
“THEY TASTE LIKE FUCKING GRASS! I bet she ordered this… things got pretty awkward already, I need to get this night-out back on track!” he thought keeping a straight face.
The Thief also picked up one of the flowers, she placed it in her mouth before spitting it out.
“What the fuck!? These taste like regular weeds!” she exclaimed.
Breathing a sigh JohnWillStab spat out no less than fifteen flowers.
“Thank god, I thought I’d have to pretend to like them for the rest of the night…” John admitted breathing a sigh of relief.
Moments later, a panicked waiter emerged from the kitchen holding a bottle of fancy-looking alcohol.
“Uhm, I noticed you guys ate the decorations, so I thought you might be thirsty,” he placed the bottle on the table.
“The boss said it’s on the house…” the waiter quickly retreated to the kitchen before John or the Thief could comment.
“Finally! Alcohol!” exclaimed the Thief.
“Hmm… Fancy booze… Candles… Large meals…” JohnWillStab scratched his head.
The Thief observed JohnWillStab as he tried to piece the setting together.
“This whole… elegant atmosphere…”
“Yes….” the Thief was waiting for John to say it.
“This is kind of like…”
“SAY IT!”
“A birthday party!” John exclaimed.
The room went silent as a loud crash could be heard from the kitchen, unbeknownst to the two guests it was the innkeeper smashing his head into the wall.
“John, you and I both know you’re birthday parties were just you, me and sometimes one of the delinquents getting drunk of cheap beer in your living room,”
“Yes, but you could have pretended otherwise…” he replied.
“Besides, expensive parties suck… you gather with other rich people and drink wine, never really getting drunk…”
“It’s like the whole party is more of a show for others than an actual party…”
“Yes, yes, I know you don’t like fancy events, but back to the topic…”
JohnWillStab’s expression grew dark.
“Hold on… you’re right… for the last few years, my birthdays cost like… twenty bucks… so this means…”
“THIS IS YOUR BIRTHDAY!” John exclaimed.
“…” the Thief looked at him with a look of pity and confusion.
“…”
“…”
“I didn’t forget!” he added nervously.
“I just faked my forgetfulness to surprise you!”
“…”
“…”
“I even got you a present!”
“Present?” she asked fully aware that he was about to come up with something on the spot.
“You see, I happen to know that you are a toast enthusiast!” John exclaimed smugly.
“This is meant to be a date John, not my birthday party,” the Thief finally said.
“Oh, why didn’t you tell me beforehand?” he asked.
“I would have put on an identical suit, except cleaner.” He added.
“I wanted to see how long it would take you to realise…” she sighed.
“I mean, I had a feeling this was meant to be a date since the start, but I didn’t want to go out a say it,” he explained.
“What?”
“Yeah, I saw Bromy give you a thumbs-up earlier so I assumed you guys were in cahoots about something,”
“Plus the candles, I mean, the booze,”
“THEN WHY NOT SAY IT BEFORE EATING A GARDEN’S WORTH OF WEEDS?!” she demanded.
“Because on the off chance I was wrong it’d be pretty awkward,” John replied.
“WHAT OFF CHANCE!? Two people go to a restaurant for a candle-lit dinner and drinks!”
“What if it was like a friends-night-out with a candle-lit dinner,” John replied.
“How much further were you going to keep doing this?!” she asked.
“If you proposed to me I would consider asking if we’re close enough for dating,” John replied fully seriously.
“Thank god I don’t have to hand my toast over!” John thought.