"We'll need to go through the valley south-west of here, It's safe to say we should expect more monsters," Pedecree explained looking over the map he took from the inn he appeared near a few days ago.
"Level thirties..." noted Foxly.
The group sat around a fire in the large cave.
"I thought we established levels don't work like they do in-game," Crown butted in.
"True, they may not make the enemy invincible for us low-levels, but it is a good indicator of their strength," Pedecree rebuked.
"Can you do stop complaining about everything for five minutes?!" Foxly demanded, he was looking at Crown.
"Oh, I'm sorry for not beaming with joy in fucking Nifelheim!" she replied.
"Wrong zone!" Foxly called back.
"NO SHIT SHERLOCK!"
The thief was making her way back from the outside the cave, she was practising her knife-throwing.
"What are they talking about?" she thought as she came within hearing-distance.
Pedecree raised his hands a bit and gestured for them to quiet down.
"Hey, hey, don't let your lover's quarrel wake the others up!" Pedecree said trying to deescalate the situation.
The thief did a one-eighty, spinning on her heel away from them.
"I am not getting involved in this." thought the thief as she began speed-walking back into the frigid outside.
Both Foxly and Crown shot Pedecree a dirty look.
Foxly let out a loud sigh before standing up.
"God, you're annoying..." he stood up and stretched a bit before heading towards the deeper portion of the cave they sat in.
"Where are you going?" asked Pedecree.
"I'm just going to take a piss," he replied.
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In reality, he wanted a break from Crown's bullshit... and also to take a piss.
As he walked further into the unlit cave the sound of the conversation by the fire became nothing more than a distant echo.
"It's so dark here... where do I piss anyway?" Foxly wondered out-loud.
After a few seconds of wondering, he bumped into a massive pillar of ice.
"Ouch!" he exclaimed placing a hand onto his head.
"Well, guess it's destiny, this is where I'm taking my piss," he decided before unsheathing his weapon.
"Now that I think about it... don't people in movies always get their tongue stuck on something like this?" he thought.
He looked down and then back up to the pillar.
"I shouldn't..."
He proceeded to make brief contact with the massive pillar of ice, not with his tongue, but with his "blade".
"Pftt, what the fuck am I doing?!" he thought, laughing a little at the stupidity of the situation.
He took a step back so as not to be sprayed with piss only to realise he was stuck.
His facial expression sank to a look of pure dread.
"Oh no..."
He tried pulling away to no avail.
"..."
For a second he considered calling for help but decided not to risk embarrassing himself.
"I know! I'll use a fire seal to melt the ice!" he thought.
"Hey, toad-tard! Are you here?" called out the voice he was hoping to avoid hearing in the first place.
"FUCK!" he thought.
She was casting a spell called a fox-light, a small blue ball of light that could follow the user, it drained mana continuously until dispelled.
Foxly desperately tried to escape.
"It's either my dignity or my d-"
"Are you lost or something?" Crown called out.
Eventually, the light reached Foxly who was still attached to the pillar, she looked at him in his compromised position as his desperate attempts to pull away from the pillar came across as somewhat... perverse.
Crown's expression didn't change as she slowly turned away and started walking back to the group.
"My bad, man, didn't mean to interrupt."
"IT'S NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE! I'M STUCK!" Foxly exclaimed.
She turned back around.
"I always expected you to be a pervert, but pillars, Foxly? Is nothing sacred to you?" she asked in a mocking tone.
"I wanted to see if I'd get stuck on the pillar-like they do in the movies!" he exclaimed.
"...what kind of fucked-up movies are you watching?!" she asked while making her way towards him, she avoided eye contact as Foxly moved his hands to cover his "icicle".
"Alright, here I go," she said before pulling him away from the pillar by the neck.
"W-w-w-w-wait! Don't!" he cried.
"Don't be a little baby!" she exclaimed while walking even further away from the pillar.
Moments later she was standing no less than a meter away from the pillar.
"I'm not sure if I should be impressed or annoyed..." she sighed.
She let go of Foxly launching him back towards the pillar, he crashed into it causing it to crack.
"Oh no..." said Crown before turning towards the little bit of light coming from the fireplace in the distance as chunks of rock and ice rained down from above closing off the entrance.
"Fuck!" she exclaimed, she looked back seeing foxly still attached to the base of the ice-pillar.
"Oh for fuck's sake!" she exclaimed stomping over to him.
Pedecree rushed over to the newly created pile of rubble blocking a section of the cave.
"Are you guys alright?!" he called out pressing his ear up against the rubble.
He heard Foxly screaming.
"Wait! No!"
Followed by a loud tearing noise.
"Oops..." Crown said with a shrug.
Foxly looked down and back to the pillar.
"..." he stood there, mouth agape and shoulders slumped.
"...It'll grow back," Crown replied uncertainly.
Foxly slowly turned his head towards her.
Roses are read...
Crown isn't nice...
Foxly's dick is stuck to a pillar of ice...
"Quit being dramatic, it's just some skin," she replied irritated.
"I am dramatic... for I have lived through something traumatic..." he replied.
"Why are you speaking in rhymes?! What is this the fucking Christmas special?!" Crown demanded.
She looked to the pillar.
"I mean the Hanukkah special," he said with a chuckle